Broken Hearted Girl
by one true voice
Summary: A Reddie fic set in series 4
1. Chapter 1

**Background for Broken Hearted Girl**

Rachel return to school suffering a few metal scars

Earl shot Maxine but she survived, he is currently in prison but Ralph Mellor is trying to get him out

Colin has returned and is getting married to Matt

Tom and Davina getting married in the summer

Chlo is pregnant

Rachel and Eddie are together but not public to the staff but they have spent Christmas together

Grantly and Steph both improved as teachers with a renewed enthusiasm for the job

Broken Hearted Girl

Part 1

"_Happy New Year" the room was filled with the sound of party poppers and cheering as the group were all welcoming in 2009. However for Rachel and Eddie this was a blur as they only saw one another and they both knew that this was the way they wanted to welcome the New Year. They were together and that this definitely was the start of new beginnings. As they leant forward their lips finally met in public for the first time and if anyone else was interested they would have seen the once private Rachel Mason disclosing her true feelings to the rest of the room. However the other party goers were too preoccupied to notice the pair of them who were too in love to care whether any one else noticed their relationship._

Bleep…Bleep…Bleep. Rachel was woken from her pleasant dream with the sound of her alarm ever since she had shared the magical experience with Eddie she dreamt of the kiss which told them that this was what they both wanted. Rachel was aware of the smile on her face when she reached across the table and hit the alarm; _first day back at school after Christmas and the beginning of my relationship with Eddie. I can't believe that I have only been awake for a couple of minutes and immediately I'm thinking about him. I read somewhere that you know you are in love, when the person in question fills your thoughts before you go to sleep and then again when you wake up in the morning. I guess that just sums up my feelings for Eddie pretty accurately then._

Rachel smiled as she knew that Eddie loved her as much as she loved him and despite only being away from him for about 24 hours in the entire fortnight that she had, had off during the Christmas holidays. _I just wish that I hadn't waited as long to get with Eddie as I love him and I was scared that he wouldn't love me after I rejected him but I couldn't be more wrong._

Rachel had already got up thirty minutes ago when she heard her phone bleep; this caused her to remember the previous time her phone buzzed this earlier in a school morning; the first day back in September. _I guess this is the same person then._ The smile which was spread across her face represented the feelings that she felt for this person as she knew that she loved him.

Rachel flipped her phone open and opened the text message; **Hi Rach, hope u had a good sleep. C U in 30 minutes; found it hard to survive the day without u yesterday as I still didn't understand why u had 2 go home yesterday. But perhaps u can explain it 2 me 2day ;) Love Eddie xxx.** Rachel smiled as she read the text knowing what Eddie was trying to imply; _I don't think he realises that my head was telling me to leave Eddie's house but my heart was telling me to stay exactly where I was; in Eddie's arms._

Her silver Mazda pulled into the car park and she was relieved that for the moment Eddie's car wasn't there. _It's not that I don't want to see Eddie but it is because I want to get work done and as soon as I see Eddie I know that work will no longer be a apriority; not something that a head teacher should be saying first day back after Christmas when she is meant to be giving a good impression to the pupils in high work ethic. _

This made Rachel smile as she remembered Eddie's New Year resolution for her; _as if he thought I, Rachel Mason, would work less_ _although, I may not have the self-control that I require which will prevent me being distracted by him. But I'm Rachel Mason and I will stay strong…hopefully._

"Come on Max, we need to be going" Steph called up the stairs as she had insisted that Maxine was getting a lift to school today rather than begin allowed to walk with Janeece. _It's not that I don't trust her but I don't trust Earl Kelly so I won't feel that Maxine is safe until I know that there is no chance that he will be released from prison._

Maxine was sitting on her bed with the tears streaming down her face; _I don't think I will be able to go back because I was so stupid letting myself get involved with Earl; although Janeece and Steph warned me off from him each of them several times over. How could I have been so stupid? _

Maxine wiped her eyes and re-applied her make-up; _hopefully Steph doesn't notice that I look upset as I'm going to struggle to get through today as it is._

His car pulled into the car park and the speed that he drove in told any prying eyes that he was impatient or running late. In Eddie's mind he was both; _he was impatient to see Rachel and as he hadn't seen her for at least 16 hours therefore he was missing her so he knew that the quicker he drove to school, the quicker he would see her. _Particularly as her car was in the car park it proved that she was here and he was eager to see her_. I wonder if she is missing me as much as I'm missing her. I convinced that she will by the time she has seen me again as she seemed to enjoy being in my arms throughout the holidays. I never thought that Rachel would ever be held in my arms and after all the waiting that it took for the pair of us to admit our feelings certainly made them stronger and I know that I'm never going to let Rachel go._

It was only when Eddie was walking up the first flight of stairs to Rachel's office did the nerves start to set in._ She wouldn't try and pretend that nothing happened because of us being back at school would she? Because I don't think I could stand it if she rejected me again, but she wouldn't would she?_


	2. Chapter 2

Part 2

"Ah, Eddie I'm glad I've caught you; although you're here early aren't you" Steph called to him as she jogged down the corridor in her ridiculous high heels which was causing her to stumble due to the thin heel on them. _I wish you hadn't seen me though because I was just about to see Rachel and I have only just built up enough confidence whereas this meeting may sap all my confidence and knowing Steph desire for gossip it will be extremely time consuming._

"The same could be said about you Steph, as you are here early" Eddie replied contemplating whether trying to dodge around Steph in the corridor would be the more effective way at getting away from her quicker.

Steph smiled at his reaction and the answer that she was able to give whereas to her knowledge Eddie had only avoided his question rather than to actually answer it. "I've got a reason though" Steph replied rather pointedly. _Oh that's nice but I want to see Rachel._ Eddie thought and the smile on his face ensured a queried expression on Steph's but thankfully she didn't pursue the matter as she continued her original statement; and the purpose as to why she wanted Eddie in the first place. "I want you to sign the card for Matt as it's his birthday today and can you put some money into the tin so I can get a present for him at lunch"

Eddie hadn't been listening to Steph as his mind had wandered and he was considering what he would be able to say to her when he intentionally got there; _if I get there as it doesn't look as though I'm getting away any time soon._ The way that Steph was thrusting the card into his hand signalled that he was expected to do something and the way that she was holding put the card gave the indication that he was suppose to be signing it. _Hopefully if I do it, it will mean that she will leave me allow and I will be free to go and see Rachel._

Eddie pulled the first pen out of his pocket that his hand touched and a piece of spare paper to ensure that the pen worked, unfortunately or as Eddie was starting to think, the conspiracy was stopping Eddie getting to Rachel; _I do hope Rachel hasn't asked Steph to try and distract me to keep me away from Rachel, although I would be surprised because it would mean that Rachel would have to tell her what happened over the holiday._

Needless to say the pen didn't work and he was left shoving his hand back into his pocket to retrieve another pen. _I hope this one works because if not I won't have time to see Rachel before assembly and I've no idea how I will get through year 11 maths._ Thankfully the pen worked and Eddie rushed away from Steph before she was able to pester him any more. _At last I have got away. _Eddie thought as he started running up the stairs holding the pen that wasn't working in his hands.

Tom and Davina were both sitting in the car in the school car park as neither of them wanted the holidays to be over yet as in 7 months time the pair of them would be married and Chlo would have had her baby. _Possibly me and Tom will have our own baby soon although as my mother is traditional I'm pleased that we are doing it the right way round by getting married and then having a family together._

"I suppose we had better start thinking about actually going into the school then" Davina said which caused Tom to pause for a minute acting as though he was putting some thought into it although he already had his answer. "Well we could but I would prefer to stay here with you" Tom said with a serious expression on his face. Davina leant forwards and gave him a quick kiss "if you get all your work done today, I may treat you later" she stated as she pulled open the passenger door and left Tom sitting there.

Eddie walked up to the office and he stood outside the door nervously contemplating his options; _do I knock on the door and risk getting rejected or do I play it cool and wait for her to come and find me. _The problem was that this wasn't really a contest as he knew in both his heart and his head he wanted to see Rachel and he wanted to see her now. Therefore he quietly knocked onto the door which bared the name of the woman that he loves. _I can't believe that I would be so nervous to see Rachel. She is normally the one that stops me being nervous not starts me off; I guess it is the affect she has on me and the way that these few moments will have the power to change both of our lives._


	3. Chapter 3

Part 3

The familiar voice of the woman that he had spent the entire holiday with came through the door, "come in". _I could add Eddie on the end of that sentence as I know it's him but I want to play it cool as I'm worried that over the holidays it was more of a holiday romance rather than anything deep and meaningful. Therefore I don't want me to go overboard and read far too much into something. _

Rachel was pulled from her thought with the sight of the door handle being depressed and the door being pushed open with the silhouette of the man she had learnt to depend on walking through. _She really does look more beautiful each time I see her but that could be because every time that I'm away it hurts more._

Eddie walked through the door and closes it behind him as he struggles to take his eyes from Rachel as she was the woman that he loves and he was struggling to remember how he managed before he was able to call her 'his'. Rachel looked up at Eddie and for a brief second their eyes met and the nervous feeling that the pair of them were feeling caused them to immediately avert their eyes. _Not the most helpful when I'm trying to determine her feelings towards me but then I guess that I did the exact same thing so let's give it another chance. _When Eddie walked towards Rachel he was rotating the pen in his hand so he placed the pen upon her desk; _at least that stops me having another distraction that will hide my true feelings._

Maxine got out of Steph's classroom and started to wander down the corridor as if she wasn't actually there as in her mind she was picturing the last time that she was here; when she was with Earl and telling him that they were finished. She couldn't believe that only a few hours later she would have been in hospital fighting for her life. _I can't imagine what I've put Steph through maybe I'm more trouble than I'm worth_.

"Eddie", "Rachel..", Eddie stopped as he realised that they both had started talking at the same time to try and end the silence which had surrounded the pair ever since Eddie had arrived in her office a few minutes ago.

They both laughed as it was another sign of their nervous around one another. _Come on Eddie; get a grip, its Rachel the woman that you love and you are acting like a teenager around her._

"You go first" Eddie said as he once again was attracted to Rachel's eyes; _because unless I get my act together I'm not even going to be able to string a sentence together. _

_Ok then if I've got to go first I had better act serious. _"Eddie you may want to sit down" Rachel said as she led him towards the desk. Eddie looked at her confused; _what has she got to tell me that may require me wanting to sit down. _Eddie tried to gauge Rachel's expression but the way that she kept avoiding looking at him in the eyes wasn't helping him.

Tom raced down the corridor ensuring that Davina hadn't got too far away from him, "Oi gorgeous, come back here" Tom called to her as he ran down the corridor ensuring that she wasn't out his sight during the entire time. Davina hurried her walking speed to a light jog as she knew that if she gave into temptation, now then she wouldn't be able to keep away from him for the entire day. _Not the most helpful if I want to qualify as a teacher._

Davina was looking behind her so she could see Tom behind her at the end of the corridor. Davina was suddenly stopped as she had ran into someone; _I just hope it's not Rachel; because I don't think that she would consider it to be appropriate even though it is first day after the Christmas holidays, especially as the kids have exams this term. I don't think seeing two teachers behaving like this would be appreciated._

However Davina didn't need to worry as it was Maxine she had ran into, "I'm so sorry", Davina replied as she was embarrassed about running into her particularly as she was trying to escape her fiancé's embrace due to the fear that she would be unable to release him.

"Don't worry, I wasn't looking where I was going" Maxine replied still not all together there.

"Are you ok Max" Tom asked as he was concerned about the far away expression that she had on her face when she was talking to the pair of them. _Maybe she isn't over the trauma as much as Steph would like to believe._ As Maxine continued down the corridor, Tom and Davina walked the other way with the pair of their thoughts being with Maxine and the realisation that rather than bringing their personal issues into school, they should be concentrating on the people they were there for as there were a lot of people who would be under scrutiny as to whether Waterloo Road was still able to protect their pupils.

Eddie got the impression that Rachel wasn't going to start speaking until he was sitting down on the chair the other side of her desk therefore he hastily sat down as he was unable to deal with the suspense any longer. He watched Rachel as she walked past him and sat down the other side of her desk. "I'm sorry but this isn't going to work" Rachel stopped as she looked away unable to see the hurt expression in Eddie's face. _Judging by the expression on his face it seems as though he believes me perhaps I'm a better actress than I thought._

"What do you mean?" Eddie asked as he was unable to believe that Rachel would suddenly end the relationship all of a sudden; _I thought she felt the same way as me; obviously not._


	4. Chapter 4

Part 4

Rachel smiled at Eddie however this did nothing to relieve his fears; _I love her and I knew that I shouldn't have come because I could have still been in my classroom living in blissful ignorance believing that Rachel Mason loved me. I suppose it was stupid to think someone as beautiful as her would want someone like me._ Eddie was considering whether it would be less painful to get up and walk out of the room and he possibly would have done if it wasn't for Rachel starting to talk again. _I love her too much to hurt her so even if she doesn't love me I'm not going to do anything to hurt her. I'm going to accept it graciously and be here as a friend whenever she needs anyone._

"Why are you looking so worried?" Rachel asked as she looked back at the worried expression on Eddie's face. Eddie looked back at Rachel as if she was absurd; _why wouldn't l Iook worried; the woman I love is trying to prepare me to tell me that she doesn't feel the same way. _The way that Rachel was looking back at Eddie told him that she was expecting an answer; _suppose I had better tell her what I'm thinking as it's the only chance I have of keeping Rachel._

"Well I thought we were comfortable around one another, I thought…" Eddie was stopped by Rachel putting her finger on his lips. Eddie pulled his head back from Rachel's finger and said "so what do you mean when you say that this isn't going to work"

Rachel smiled now noticing the way that Eddie had understood it, "No Eddie, I meant that it's not going to work because every time that I see you in the morning I love you more so if I continue to see you in the morning I'm not going to be able to leave you allow". Rachel stated and was embarrassed about the way that she had been so open with her feelings. Eddie smiled at her knowing how hard it must have been for her to tell him that.

"So does that mean that we are officially going out now then?" Eddie asked unable to stop the delighted expression being shown on his face; _and I thought that Rachel was going to dump me. I don't think I will ever understand that woman but I'm never going to stop trying._

Rachel considered the answer that she was going to give to Eddie; _yes I want to say to Eddie that I want to publicly announce our relationship but at the same time, I'm scared that if I let myself get in too deep then I will only be left heart broken when it falls apart. Eddie was the person who picked me up last time when I was at rock-bottom; when my past was announced, therefore I don't know who would be able to pick me up next time._

"Yes we are a couple" Rachel said which caused Eddie to wrapped his arms around Rachel and clung to her almost as if he was mentally telling himself that he would never let Rachel go. Eddie was smiling to himself knowing that if Rachel was by his side his life would be prefect whereas Rachel was feeling this to a lesser extent as she was also feeling anxious due to the impending decision that they would have to inform the rest of the staff.

"But we don't have to tell the staff and pupils yet do we?" Rachel asked Eddie as she pulled back from the embrace that Eddie held her in. The expression on his face told him that he was confused as to why he wouldn't want to announce their relationship publicly. _I want the whole world to know that I'm going out with Rachel Mason. _The confused expression on his face told her that he required answers. _And I suppose that I had better give them to him._

"It's just that I'm scared that it will look unprofessional for the pair of us to announce our relationship to the rest of the staff particularly as we'll not sure how serious it is". Rachel immediately regretted what she had said; _why did I need to say that. I wish I had just kept quiet; would it really have been too bad for the rest of the school to know._

Eddie looked incredibly disappointed and in fear of showing his displeasure at Rachel's recent comment he said, "I better go and prepare for my lesson". Eddie said as he released Rachel and started walking to the door.


	5. Chapter 5

Part 5

"Hang on a minute, Eddie" Rachel said which caused Eddie to immediately spin round in the hope that Rachel had only been joking and she was going to tell him how much she loves him however she started speaking before Eddie was able to respond and the relieved expression on his face was instantly changed.

"I wanted to run a new policy to you before I tell the rest of the staff in morning briefing at break today" Rachel said finding it increasingly hard not to smile at Eddie. "I think we should operate a new policy in school for the staff of non-contact" Rachel said and immediately she realised the confused expression on Eddie's face. "Non-contact?" Eddie repeated almost as though he was checking that he wasn't missing anything. _Is this so she has further reason to push me away why don't we operate a two metre rule between members of staff in the school; or more particularly me and Rachel. It's obviously what she wants._

"Yes you know, as it doesn't look professional for members of staff to be romantically involved with one another especially when we have visitors to the school so to make sure everyone knows where they stand I suggest we operate this policy from today. What do you think to the idea?" Rachel asked Eddie knowing that he would absolutely hate the idea and he would suggest anything that would prevent this policy being put into practice. _What does she think that I'm going to feel about it. I love Rachel and she has practically told me that she feels nothing for me and that the feelings that I thought existed were in my imagination._

Rachel who was trying to stop herself laughing, she picked up the pen that Eddie had placed on her desk as this would have provided the distraction that she desperately needed. Rachel opened the file that was placed on her desk and pretend to be scribbling away almost as if she was actually writing notes on the page. _I wonder if I have managed to convince Eddie that this is how I feel. _Rachel was expecting Eddie to leave her office and then try and test the policy out later but instead he seemed intent in finding out what Rachel meant. _I can't help feeling that there is something happening which I don't understand and I know that Rachel won't tell me straight away so I'm going to stay here and help her through it, whatever it is._

Tom's phone buzzed in his pocket and he withdraw it looking at the display. _I'm just glad that Davina isn't next to me or I would never have the confidence to read the text but I know I have too as I need to know the answer. _Tom smiled when he realised who it was and he moved even further away from Davina to ensure that she wouldn't be able to read the message.

**Hi, I managed 2 sort that out 4 u, u can thank me later. Rose x**

Davina sidled up to Tom and said "what you looking so happy about?" She asked which caused Tom to jump as he had been in a world of his own.

"Nothing for you to worry about" Tom replied as he slipped his phone back into his pocket.

"So what falls into this non-contact policy?" Eddie asked carefully trying to stop the bitterness he was feeling to be shown towards Rachel as although she was unintentionally hurting him; he still loved her and he guessed he probably would never stop loving her despite how much she tried to push him away.

"Well undoubtedly kissing one another and most probably holding hands as well" Rachel replied and let the smile spread over her face when Eddie was gazing out of the window in an attempt to stop his displeasure being directed towards Rachel. Before Eddie looked back Rachel had returned her expression to the typical head teacher expression that she often employed when she was 'dealing' with a serious topic.

Before Eddie was able to stop himself, the anger that had finally boiled over caused him to say, "So basically any public show of affection…" Before Eddie was able to say any more Rachel interrupted him, "Yes Eddie that's exactly right" she said with feigned excitement in her voice almost enough to give the impression that this was what she wanted. Eddie looked back at her bewildered; _I suppose this is certainly telling me where I stand isn't it?_

Eddie walked towards the door full of anger at the way that Rachel never seemed to be comfortable unless she was pushing him away; _what could have happened today so it would cause Rachel to feel like this? _Eddie had one last glance at Rachel as she was doing the work on the desk; _why does she always hide behind her work. _He realised that if she continued in her destructive ways then this relationship wouldn't be strong enough to break through the barriers that Rachel surrounds her heart with. It was then that Eddie noticed it.

_Well unless that pen has decided to work for Rachel now, she obviously isn't doing as much work as she is trying to give the impression that she is. But why?_

"So Rachel did you miss me yesterday?" Eddie asked as he leant against the door frame gazing back at the sight of Rachel almost as if he was trying to submit all her features to his memory.

Rachel looked up at Eddie startled and as she thought that Eddie had gone she couldn't stop the smile that broke out on her face when she saw him. _For once I can't be bothered with trying to cover my feelings I want him to know how I'm feeling as I trust Eddie and I know that he will never let anything happen to me._

"Was I supposed to miss you?" Rachel asked as she put the pen down and stood up. The smile on her face told him that this was said in jest as she had certainly missed him as much as she missed him.

Eddie extended his arms and Rachel walked into them as he wrapped his arms around her and breathed in her perfume now appreciating her more than ever due to the impending danger that this may be over in a flash. _Although I will fight until the bitter end to ensure that I never let Rachel go. _Their head gravitated towards one another as their eyes were attracted to the others. _I can't believe that I'm actually able to do this as I've dreamed about it for so long but I never thought that it would ever happen._

Before their lips got to touch, there was a knock at the door and the pair of them sprung away from one another; _we want to keep it quiet for a bit longer and if that's a sacrifice that I have to make to be with Rachel I would do it. I just wonder who it is?_

Rachel had beckoned the intruder into her office and was surprised that it was Steph; _she really is taking the job a lot more seriously now but I wonder what could have happened so she wants to talk to me at this early time in the morning._


	6. Chapter 6

Part 6

Rachel heard Eddie groan as she walked into the room; _I wonder what Steph has done to upset Eddie as he seemed to be in a good mood before she came in and now he looks as though he is grumpy. But I guess it's probably better to get rid of Steph and then determine, what's the matter with Eddie?_

"What can I do for you Steph" Rachel asked trying to turn her attention to Steph rather than worrying what could be the matter.

"Well I was wondering whether you would be able to sign this card for Matt as it's his birthday today". Steph asked thrusting the card into Rachel's hands so theoretically she didn't have a choice whether she signed it or not. Rachel quickly signed the card and wrote a quick message how 'the first round of drinks would be on her later at the pub'. Rachel put money into the collection for Matt's present and then was preparing for Steph to leave Eddie and her alone again. However Steph seemed to be lingering almost as if she wanted to say something to the pair of them or specifically Rachel.

Rachel noticed the expression on Steph's face which could have been considered as one showing her nerves. _I wonder what could be the matter as I know it must be serious for Steph to let anyone else know._ Rachel could appreciate this because over the last few months Rachel could see a lot of her own qualities in Steph. _But what can I do to help her?_

"Steph is everything" Rachel asked which caused Steph to look panicked almost as if she didn't know whether to tell the truth or blatantly lie. _I think lie is the best approach. _"Everything's fine" Steph said and edged towards the door, hoping to leave quickly before Rachel was able to extract anything that should have remained hidden.

"Steph, you know my door is always open don't you, if ever you need someone to talk to; it doesn't matter when. I'm here for you" Rachel commented as Steph opened the door and left the office after acknowledging the last comment from Rachel.

Rachel looked at Eddie with a concerned expression on her face; _great I've only been at school for 20 minutes and I've going to have to deal with two situations where people are unhappy; surely it isn't the school as it's not that bad is it?_

"Eddie is everything alright between you and Steph because I noticed that you groaned when she came in". _Rachel probably wouldn't admit it but Steph was her closest friend; well apart from Eddie therefore Rachel require them to get along as it would have made her life easier._

Eddie was also concerned about Steph therefore he said, "yes it was nothing personal towards Steph it was just that they were interrupting us" Rachel smiled at Eddie as she realised what he meant.

"Don't worry Mr. Lawson, I'm sure that you will survive" Rachel replied as she stepped further away from Eddie as this decreased the temptation to kiss Eddie. _Not good when we have assembly in 10 minutes as I wouldn't want to leave him to go to the assembly and if I get through this bit without kissing him it will give me the encouragement I need to get to break._

"Do you think that Steph's ok, because she's extremely stubborn and I don't know how to get past that, any ideas?" Rachel asked Eddie which caused him to smile.

"I think you have to be there for her and constantly reassure her". Eddie said knowing that if Rachel thought about it she would realise the double meaning behind the comment. Rachel thought about what Eddie had said and then smiled as she realised that not only was Eddie talking about Steph but he was also talking about Rachel.

Rachel walked towards Eddie and for the first time since they had been officially going out Rachel instigated the embrace which the pair of them felt comfortable in. _I love the feel of Eddie's arms around me and if I'm as stubborn as Steph, I wonder why Eddie still wants to break my barriers down. _ Rachel leant forward as ever impulse in her body was encouraging her to kiss Eddie and the reasons she had for resisting had faded away. Their lips were nearly touching when they were interrupted by the bell ringing to signal the start of assembly.

Rachel audibly sighed and stepped away from Eddie to increase the distance; "Come on Mr. Lawson we have an assembly to get to" Rachel said as she walked out of the office door leaving Eddie moan yet again for another interruption. Eddie saw Rachel walking down the corridor from her office and he ran after her using his height over her he whispered in her ear "am I ever going to get the good morning kiss that I've missed for today". Rachel smiled at his Eddie's comment and as was holding the corridor door for her she replied; "only if you deserve it". Before Eddie was able to comment Rachel walked through the door which led into the hall and proceeded to walk onto the stage


	7. Chapter 7

Part 7

Rachel stood at the front of the hall and as the pupils respected her, the mummers faded rather quickly which for a moment left silence in the hall particularly as both Eddie and Rachel were exchanging glances remembering their previous conversation. _It really doesn't help having Eddie sitting there as I'm struggling to act professional. I guess I better get back into Head teacher mode; although that may fall apart whenever Eddie is near, as I have a belief that my self-control is weak around him although I'm determined to prove that I have more self-control then him._

"Welcome back after your Christmas holidays I hope that you had a good rest and then you have come back refreshed. There have been a couple of staffing changes since last term as we have filled the P.E position and the teacher is somebody called Mr. Cleaver and he will be arriving with us later today. We have recently been able to offer German as a GCSE language so this will be taught by Miss Haydock.

Mr Clarkson resigned as Head of Pastoral Care last term so I have employed someone to fill the position". When Rachel announced this it was met with various gasps and groans as the students had taken to Tom and they actually felt as though he had the interests of the students in mind.

There was one person who heard the groans but didn't join in because she wasn't in the room with all the rest of them. The worst thing was that barring the people who she had walked to school with, she was convinced that nobody else would be aware that she wasn't in the room. The tears ran down her cheeks as she looked at the small scar that she had as a result of the incident with Earl Kelly. _How could I be so stupid; why didn't I listen to the advice that anyone told me; they told me that he was trouble and I was better off without him but I thought I knew best; why?_

_I should have realised when he stole the money and Steph's bracelet but I gave him another chance, if I could repeat the recent events again I would never have got involved with him, but then I suppose it's easy to say with hindsight._

Maxine had cried so many tears recently it almost seemed natural to have them dripping from her face and onto her hand which was rubbing almost as if it was tainted with the guilt that she felt at the belief that she had caused nothing but trouble for Steph and here she was continuing to do so.

It was the first time during Rachel's assembly that the mummers started again as the pupils wondered who would be able to do the job as many of the teachers already had too many commitments to enable them to do the job properly. Rachel looked around the room and was pleasantly surprised at the disapproval that the pupils were showing to the information that Tom was no longer head of Pastoral Care. _At least it showed that he must have been doing something right to make the pupils feel this strongly but I had better inform them as to who is taking over the position because unless I intervene soon I doubt that I will ever regain silence during the assembly and I would quite like to see the pupils reactions when they realise who it is. Because every decision that I make in this school is for the pupils therefore if I leave the school at the end of the day knowing that the majority of the pupils; or even staff for that matter, don't approve of a decision that I have made then I have failed them._

Rachel stood in silence at the front of the stage and within half a minute the hall was restored to the silence which it had previously been held in. "I can tell you're disappointed about the decision but Mr. Clarkson felt he was able to devote enough time to it therefore the decision was taken which lead to the new appointment". Rachel stopped talking almost as if she was enjoying the power which the anticipation in the room brought. _Particularly as it's only me and Eddie who know who the appointment is, if I'm honest, if I was braver then I wouldn't have had to consult him particularly but after the extended services; aah yes that's another thing I have to talk to them about, and the incident with Earl Kelly. I have lost the confidence in my decisions therefore I thought if I ran through them with Eddie he would be able to help me make a decision which is more likely to be successful because I trust Eddie with my life._

Rachel assemblies weren't typical of other schools that she had been in; where the pupils have to sit in silence while the adult stands at the front talking about a topic which the pupils don't care about and furthermore has no really impact upon their life. Rachel used to sit in on these assemblies and vowed that if she was ever to become a head teacher; then she would be a stickler for discipline but at the same time there had to be that level of mutual respect.

Therefore Rachel was pleased when the pupil that she and everyone thought she had made the biggest impact on; Bolton, asked her a direct question, "So who is the person who has replaced Mr. Clarkson" Rachel smiled at the way there was a time when Bolton was all for giving up school as he didn't consider the relevance of it but here he was asking about the staffing arrangements. _I guess that just shows that no-body is a lost cause and given a bit of encouragement and respect they can achieve anything after all the moral of Waterloo Road is 'Everything from nothing' I guess this sums up the pupils fairly accurately. _


	8. Chapter 8

Part 8

She realised that the once professional Rachel Mason was going off on yet another tangent; _must be the effect that Mr. Lawson has on me. _This was the wrong decision to think about as it meant subconsciously she risked another glance in his direction and as he was waiting for her to continue speaking, their eyes locked and she found it impossible to look away. _I probably wouldn't have managed to look away if I wasn't in a room with 500 pupils and about 20 staff._

"Good question Bolton, because rather than me telling you who the person is I think I will let them do their own introductions; I just hope that you help them settle in quickly and offer them support if they need it to begin with. I don't think there's much more for me to say so Mr. Lawson could you do the honours please".

The pupils looked confused at Eddie as they didn't understand how Mr. Lawson would have more time to devote to being Head of Pastoral care then Tom did. The pupils looked at one anther confused and this was only increased as Eddie rather than walking to the front of the hall walked towards the back and out of the door.

Danielle looked at Aleesha and neither of them knew what to say to one another and they were trying desperately hard to suppress the laughter as to their knowledge Eddie was the new Head of Pastoral Care and instead of telling them what they had previously been told dozens of times; about how important and special they all were and if they worked hard then they could achieve but instead he just seemed to walk out of the hall. Feeling that the assembly had been a disaster, Danielle looked at Aleesha and said "looks as though Lawson doesn't want the job, do ya think that Mason even asked him"

Bolton looked at Rachel and felt sorry for her. _I bet she wishes she could run away as I bet she feels humiliated by this now. I will kill Lawson, how could he do that to her. Why would he want to make her look stupid?_ However Bolton was confused because whereas he was expecting her to have the hurt and to a certain extent anger expression on her face she didn't almost as if it was part of the plan.

Bolton was getting fed up of the muffled laughter which was coming from the year 8's who seemed to be surrounding Bolton, "why don't you just shut up" Bolton said to them with his voice increasing in volume towards the end of the statement because if he was his old self he would have stood up and punched the lads but Rachel had changed him; _I can't have two people letting her down now can I? As we obviously can't rely on Mr. Lawson?_ The terrified expression on their faces told him that using the short sentence proved effective and he was convinced that he wasn't going to hear another noise from them for a while.

The door opened and in walked Eddie, Bolton was finding it hard not to boo, but on the realisation that Rachel probably wouldn't approve caused Bolton to try and suppress his feelings despite believing that his deputy had a lot of grovelling to do. The pupils were confused when Eddie was holding the door almost as if he was waiting for somebody to walk in.

It seemed to take an eternity for the person to follow Eddie in through the door but eventually they came into sight. The pupils who recognised the person smiled and appreciated the decision that Tom had made because this person would definitely have the interests of the pupils in mind. Bolton had looked to the back of the hall and the expression on his face when he saw the person was one of excitement. Bolton looked to Rachel at the front and their eyes locked as Rachel was trying to determine what the opinion of the pupils was on the new appointment. The expressions that Rachel saw on the faces of the people in front of her, told her that this was a very good appointment and the pupils were pleased to have her back.

The mystery staff member looked to Eddie at the door almost as though she was asking for reassurance that this was the right decision for her. Obviously she saw the indication she required as she took steps into heading through the door which Eddie was still holding open.

She walked to the front of the hall and proceeded to walk onto the stage, Rachel and the woman smiled at one another and the women looked expectantly at the pupils in front of her; waiting patiently for them to settle down as the older pupils were excited about who had returned to the school. Soon silence descended on the hall once more and the women started speaking, "Hello Waterloo Road, for any of you who don't know my name is Miss Campbell and I am taking over the role of Head of Pastoral Care".

The year 12 pupils who had been there when Kim left a year and a half ago started cheering and chanting, "there's only one Miss Campbell". The teachers sitting around the edge of the room started smiling at the way effective teachers can get respect from the pupils if they show pupils respect.


	9. Chapter 9

Part 9

"I want you to know that if you ever need to talk to anyone there is always a member of staff here to talk to; whether it's me, Miss Campbell or even Mr. Clarkson; as he will still be helping Miss Campbell in her role as Head of Pastoral Care. I want you all to know that my door is always open". Rachel said to the pupils who were now aware of the serious tone that the assembly had taken hold of.

Bolton and Janeece looked at one another as these were the two people who suffered the most from the events of last term; when Maxine was shot. _I was wondering how long it would take for Miss Mason to bring it up, it's probably a good job that Earl is in the young offenders institute because I know that Bolton would try and kill him if he could for hurting Max._

The bell rang so it ended the assembly and the pupils headed in two directions; they either approached Kim to welcome her back to the school and try and find out what Rwanda was like or they headed out of the hall and started going to lesson. The staff knew that they would be able to welcome her back later therefore the majority of them walked out in their small groups.

"So then Steph, have you got any information for me" Matt asked with an excitement expression on his face as he knew that if anyone was going to know anything then Steph Haydock would be the person to ask. _I think that's why I'm proud to call her my friend; not much escapes our attention._

"Well not really but I wonder where Andrew is because I thought that if he was back we would have had a grand introduction to him as well" Steph said to Grantly and Matt as she made the most of the gossip that she was provided with. _Why are everyone else's life's a lot more exciting then my own as I never seem to be able to have anything to gossip about where as other people's lives are filled with opportunities which me and Matt exploit on a hourly basis._

Matt laughed at the way that she had only been at school for about 20

minutes; well to his knowledge anyway, and she had already found something to talk about, "Maybe he is working at a different school" Matt suggested, which seemed in his opinion to be a fairly intelligent comment as Waterloo Road wasn't the only school in the area. Therefore it was quite possible that he was deputy head for another school particularly as Waterloo Road didn't need another deputy as they had got Eddie.

Rachel was sitting on the chair in her office with clear pictures forming in her head with all the memories which brought her so much pain; the problem for Rachel was that these memories weren't from her past instead they were mistakes which had been made during the last couple of years ever since she had been part of Waterloo Road. _I can accept that my mistakes effect my life but what I can't take is the way that in my position of responsibility I can alter another person's life so dramatically._ Rachel removed the white envelope which she had taken a great deal of thought into composing and making sure that what was written in the letter was the best way of expressing her feelings without having to permanently remove the barriers which had been placed around her heart.

Davina walked down the corridor as she was heading towards her classroom when she considered it to be a more worthwhile exercise to pay Tom a visit; _as I've not since him for 10 minutes and I'm already missing him._ She walked to the door and heard two voices; one was clearly Tom's. Davina smiled when she heard it because it made her heart swell with the pride that she felt due to the knowledge that in a few months she would be marrying him. The other voice sounded as though it was Rose Kelly's but why would Tom be talking to her particularly as he was aware of my concerns as to her feelings for Tom before. _What do I do if I don't go in the classroom it will be driving me mad questioning what they could be talking about but if I do and it's nothing it will seem as though I don't trust Tom and then he may possibly leave me for good, what can I do?_


	10. Chapter 10

Part 10

Maxine eventually dried her tears from off her face and walked inside mentally preparing herself for being the main gossip of the students in the school. She was so used to the nightmare where all the rest of the school pointed and laughed at her it was almost as though it had actually happened as the comments that she imagined them saying seemed to be so realistic; 'look there's the stupid girl who thought that she knew better and ended up getting shot'. _How will I manage with those comments, if I sat outside crying how will I have the strength not to cry when I hear them?_

Grantly and Steph looked at Matt as if he was stupid, "But he's not come back with her Matt" Steph replied as she seemed to have totally missed the concept which he was trying to express.

_You know what I give up,_ Matt thought as he made his excuses and walked away from the pair of them with Grantly saying, "he probably got sick of hearing her clear cut opinions on things. _Will those two ever get any work done today because I fear for Kim that she will be the subject of their gossip. Gossiping is so immature._

There was a knock on her door which caused her to quickly hide the letter in a top of her drawer as she called for them to enter her sanctity; the one place where she felt safe because she didn't have to pretend that she wasn't hurting from both the memories of the fire and the knowledge that her decision to keep the Kelly's at school caused Maxine to be shot. _I'm surprised that Steph doesn't hate me due to the possible danger that I pose as everyone who I get near to, I end up putting in danger or hurting; more often than not both. _

The person who walked through the door was the person that Rachel had allowed herself to get the closest to therefore he was the one that she posed the greatest danger to. _Perhaps I have to break it off before I hurt him more than I already have or ultimately will._

Grantly and Steph waited until Matt had slammed the door at the end of the corridor as he was not impressed that he had found anything to be worthwhile and defiantly nothing that would make him money from the bets that they had placed at the end of last year; particularly about Rachel and Eddie. _I guess I had better sing 'happy birthday to myself because it is quite apparent that nobody else has remembered. If anything I thought that Steph would have remembered and I appreciate that she has had other things going on over Christmas with Maxine being in hospital but it's not as though I expected a present, but I would have thought they could have wished me 'Happy Birthday'. But no instead they were more interested in contemplating whether Andrew has come back with Kim, why don't they just wait and see_

"Good I'm glad that he has gone because it means that you will be able to sign this" Steph said as she pulled out the card and thrust the pen into Grantly's hand; he groaned as this seemed yet another interruption that stopped him getting to his beloved 'Racing Post'. _The worst part about the holidays is that Fleur doesn't approve of the paper that I chose to read therefore she has banned it from being in the house. The only time I have to read it is during school, which is the reason why I read it obsessively; it's as though I have to catch up on several additions._

Eddie walked into her office and saw the expression which Rachel often used to give the impression that everything was fine when really it was the complete opposite and due to the length of time that Eddie had spent with Rachel recently he was better at reading her emotions and she looked as though she was physically hurting. _I wonder what could have happened because the assembly went fine as the pupils were pleased that we have Kim back as Head of Pastoral Care so I wonder what could have happened so Rachel is doubting herself and I wonder what I can do to make it better for her because I love her and I hate the fact that she doesn't trust herself any longer._

Grantly hastily signed the card and looked in horror at Steph when she pulled the collection out for Matt, "What you want me to give some money as well?" he asked however the expression on her face told him that the quicker that he paid up the quicker that she would leave him in peace. "Fine here you go then" Grantly exclaimed as he withdrew a pound from his wallet and chucked it into the collection, Steph looked in horror at Grantly due to the way that he had only donated 1 pound, "oh thank you Grantly, you are so generous" Steph said sarcastically as she left Grantly to his paper as he relaxed into the chair that he called his own and said, "this is the life". It was enough to show that this was all that Grantly was intending to do.

Davina realised that to put her mind at ease she would have to enter Tom's classroom and see the reaction that she received when she walked in; _if either of them look embarrassed or uncomfortable I know that Tom is having an affair and I will have to question it. _She knocked on the door and saw Tom rapidly putting something in his pocket almost as if he was trying to hide something; _but he didn't know it was me so wonder what it could be that he wanted to hide it no matter who it was at the door._

As her eyes met with Rose's she saw an expression of awkwardness and Rose looked away to meet her eyes with Tom's, almost as if she was trying to tell him something through the expression which she was using. _If only I could see what expression Tom had on his face because then I would understand his opinion on me being here._

Rose sensed the tension among the 3 of them in the room therefore she looked at the clock and said, "I'm sorry I've got to go see you both soon". Before either of them were able to object; not that Davina wanted to, she had left the room and the pair of them in the uncomfortable silence once more. Tom turned around so that he was facing Davina and saw the hurt look on her face; _if only I could tell her want had happened but I'm sworn to secrecy. I just hope that this doesn't split the pair of us up._


	11. Chapter 11

Part 11

"So then Rachel do I deserve my good morning kiss yet" Eddie asked as he walked towards Rachel having shut the office door; leaving the pair of them in her sanctity. If Rachel was honest the one person she didn't mind having to share it with was Eddie as he always managed to calm her down and put everything in perspective.

"Well I don't know because this head teacher is very busy and a certain deputy of her just keeps harassing her for attention". Rachel replied with a smile threatening to overpower her emotions.

Eddie mocked a horrified expression on his face which made Rachel laugh as she was starting to forget all previous thoughts that she had; particularly about the letter. _But surely I have to accept my responsibility as it was my decision to keep Earl Kelly here and now look at the damage which has been done._

"well I think the workaholic head teacher should focus her attention elsewhere and then everybody would be happy" Eddie replied and he noticed the small smile that filled Rachel's face although she tried her best to contain it. _I wish I didn't have to work as hard but it's the only way I don't see the memories showing me all my mistakes and the destruction that I leave in my wake._

"Perhaps if my deputy focused his attention in more effective areas, then I won't have to work so hard" Rachel replied realising that she was actually enjoying the banter which the pair of them often started whenever the pair of them were together.

Davina walked to Tom's classroom as she was surprised that she hadn't seen him for the whole day; _well apart from the awkward meeting earlier today when Rose was there, I wonder what she must have given Tom which was such a secret they had to hide it. Then they wonder why I get suspicious of the pair of them, but I will make it up to him now as I trust him, perhaps he was just thanking her for the Christmas present that she brought around to our house._

"Just give me a kiss, Mason" Eddie replied trying to be as forceful as he could be on such an issue, Rachel would have ignored it completely if he wasn't grinning at her; _I love him when he does that, I think that's what I fell in love with him in the first place._ Rachel stood up and walked towards Eddie and the pair of them narrowed the distance between the pair of themselves.

The knock of the door interrupted them once again, "aw Mr. Lawson unlucky once again" Rachel said as she teasingly withdraw from the close proximity which she enjoyed when she was near Eddie. _I can't believe that I may have never experienced this with Eddie._

"You wanted to kiss me as much as I wanted to kiss you" Eddie replied getting increasingly annoyed at the constant interruptions. The knocking on the door proved that the person wasn't planning on leaving them in peace any time soon. Rachel increased the distance until it represented nothing more than colleagues although the pair of them knew they had been more than that for an incredibly long time now.

"Come in" Rachel called to the person who had interrupted another precious moment that Rachel and Eddie shared. It wasn't that they didn't share many special moments it just that to Rachel they seemed few and far between so it seemed more infuriating that at school there was always somebody else that craved one, if not both of their attentions. _I guess that's the downside of being head teacher but I don't think I would change it for the world because if I hadn't joined Waterloo Road I would never have met Eddie._

Steph walked through the door and Eddie looked at her bewildered; _does she have some sort of radar as to when me and Rachel are going to kiss therefore does she come to interrupt us._

"Hi Steph, how can I help?" Rachel asked to the older woman who looked in some considerable distress.

"w…Well you said that if I ever needed to talk you were here, so I guess here I am" Steph replied although she wasn't looking forward to unloading her problems on someone who 6 months ago she would have considered to be her enemy. Admittedly over the last few months the pair of them had grown closer but this still seemed to be uncharted waters for the pair of them.

Rachel got the impression that this was going to be a hard conversation for the pair of them therefore she looked at Eddie and immediately he knew what she was asking making his excuses he left the pair of them in the office which following Steph initial comment had been surrounded in a dark, cold silence; one that indicated neither of them were totally comfortable in having this conversation. _How am I supposed to react around Steph when I don't know if she blames me for Maxine being shot?_ Rachel motioned for Steph to sit down on the sofa hoping that the comfort that this offered would miraculously transfer into Steph; _as I'm not sure how much help I'm going to be._ Rachel looked at Steph and waited patiently for her to continue. _I remember Eddie saying that the thing you have to do is wait until they are ready to tell you._


	12. Chapter 12

Part 12

Steph and Rachel sat there in silence as neither of them knew the way to start the conversation and yet both of them knew that it was a conversation which they needed to have for both of their benefits. _I wonder if I should just start the conversation to see whether she does blame me for Maxine being shot. Or perhaps I should start it a different way to allow Steph to start talking and then I will listen and add my input when it is deemed necessary. _

When Rachel had finally made a decision it was too late as Steph had already established what she was going to say and despite knowing that she would find it hard to open up to Rachel; or anyone else for that matter, she hoped that Rachel would understand. _Because me and Rachel are actually extremely similar; we both need help but we both try and pretend that we are strong enough she we don't need anyone but in reality we are unsure of ourselves and we need someone to support us and tell us that everything will be alright. Because if I know Rachel, like I think I do, she will be blaming herself for the incident with Maxine when really it was all my fault._

Needless to say when Davina arrived at Tom's classroom she wasn't expecting to see Tom leaning forwards and giving her a kiss on the cheek. _Surely he isn't cheating on me because we only arranged to get married a few weeks ago and I thought he wanted to get married because he is helping with the preparations but instead when I walk past I see him kissing another woman._ The tears threatened to spill from her eyes so to save her embarrassment she left the pair of them in blissful ignorance that they had been seen. _This is the last time that any man cheats on me; I'd have thought I could have trusted Tom what with the hard time that he gave Jack but instead he is only doing the exact same thing. Well I'm not waiting for him to break it off, I will do it first._

"I'm sorry Rachel, it's all my fault" Steph started and then stopped abruptly as she was struggling to prevent the tears from flowing. _This is the only time I think about it because I know that I have to be strong for Maxine so I have tried to pretend that it didn't happen I have kept it bottled up and now it seems as though it is finally spilling out. I'm just glad that I have someone here that I believe will comfort me although I would prefer it, if I wasn't about to cry in front of the woman who I used to hate and to be honest I think the feeling was mutual._

Rachel looked back at Steph feeling sorry for the woman that she knew was breaking inside. _I wish I could do something to make it better for her but what can I do._

"No Steph, it's my fault because I'm the one that kept the Kelly's at the school when everyone around me was telling me that I should get rid of them because they were trouble; but no I thought I knew best. How stupid of me!" Rachel said trying to breathe through the tears as she didn't want them to fall due to the belief that she had to be strong for the woman that over recent weeks she had begun to admire. _Although I doubt that I will ever tell her that._

"But it's not your fault" Steph replied sensing that the more reserved of the two women was blaming herself for the situation which had occurred. "I'm the one that allowed Maxine to get in a relationship with Earl and I'm the one that didn't try hard enough to protect her. As her mother, it's my responsibility to ensure that she is kept safe from harm and danger but instead I let her walk straight into it". The tears were now flowing freely down Steph's face and despite her best efforts she was finding it impossible to stop them.

Rachel wanted to pull her close and tell her that everything would be okay as Earl was now in a young offenders institute but what Rachel didn't know was that he was very close to being released due to the false evidence that Ralph kept drawing up.

"Yes but she is safe now isn't she?" Rachel asked as she wanted to reassure Steph that she had done all she could to keep Maxine safe and to gently break the news that she needed to be kept safe more than ever now. _Unfortunately I know from first hand experience that she will be suffering more than ever now and she needs people around her that she is able to trust._

"Yeah but how much longer will I be able to keep her safe for" Steph responded through the tears although she immediately wished that she hadn't said that as she wanted to keep it quiet with the least people knowing the better instead in a moment of weakness she had exposed the one secret she wanted; needed to keep quiet.

Rachel looked at her confused; _what does she mean why wouldn't she be able to keep her safe because he is in prison now and won't be able to hurt anyone for a long time. _"Steph what do you mean?" Rachel asked as the head teacher instinct kicked in due to the knowledge that a pupil may be in harm again but she was also concerned. Concerned due to the fact that one of her friends was going through hell before her eyes and there seemed to be nothing that she could say to relieve the suffering. _I need Eddie as he always knows how to calm me down, perhaps I have to think what he does towards me and I will translate that into helping Steph._

Rachel shuffled closer and put her arm around Steph trying to hold back the desire to cry herself. _I have to be strong for Steph as Eddie has so often been for me._ This seemed to comfort Steph so she said, "It's Ralph Mellor…


	13. Chapter 13

Part 13

Rachel looked back at her confused, "what do you mean, what has Ralph Mellor got to do with anything"

"Because Ralph is trying to get Earl out of prison" Steph responded saying it with a shocked angry sound to her voice almost as despite her saying it she still couldn't quite believe that it was true. _I really don't see the advantage in trying to get Earl out of prison unless it is so the Kelly's owe him so they pretty much do what ever he asks of them and so he gets back at me._

The bell rang to signal it was the start of the break which would normally be seen as some sort of respite for the staff and the pupils due to them not quite being used to having to be in the routine to teach and learn respectively however for certain members of the Waterloo Road staff, this break would make or break their life's. Davina walked into the staff room and saw Rose once more standing next to Tom; the blood started to boil in her veins as she wondered how they believed they would be able to get away with something when they were being so blatantly obvious with it. _They must think that I'm stupid; well I will show them, that I'm not._

"b…but why would Ralph want Earl out of prison I thought he would be glad to see the back of him" Rachel replied as she couldn't understand as to why Ralph would want to get Earl out of prison as she believed that he hated the Kelly's almost as much as he hated Rachel herself.

Davina marched over to the pair of them and as Rose was able to see her before Tom she coughed to signal to Tom that somebody else was close to their proximity. This caused Davina to be angered further because this showed that the pair of them knew what they were doing was wrong however they were still prepared to do it and break her heart.

Deciding that now probably wasn't the best time to confront the pair of them, Davina walked to the sink and made herself a cup of coffee, by now the pair of them had split up leaving the three of them alone in the staffroom but all three of them were preparing to sit on different sofas. Tom realised that if he sat on a separate sofa to Davina he was as good as ending his relationship with Davina in a non-verbal way; _I couldn't bear it if the pair of us split up because I love Davina._

As the tears were flowing freely down the pair of their faces, Rachel removed her arm from around the back of Steph and walked towards her desk. She walked around the front of it and subconsciously she removed the box of tissues that had been hidden there. _How pathetic is that having to hide the tissues because you try and act so strong when really you break down every day that you get into your office with the memories from last year engulfing you. It just to be alright when I just saw them in my sleep because I could block them out during the day and I used to be able to pretend that it was the over-active imagination that I used to get accused of by my parents but instead they are always in the back of my mind. I just can't get rid of them as anything serves them to trigger off and jump to the forefront of my mind where I can do nothing but accept what a bad person I am._

Tom walked towards Davina and sat down beside her, despite the gap between the pair of them the atmosphere between the pair of them seemed to intensify it to such a point it crossed both of their minds whether their relationship was even salvageable at this early point. Rose walked out the room as she realised that the pair of them had much to talk about and she was the obstacle in the relationship at the moment. _I just hope she listens to him enough so she understands what has happened between the pair of us._

Steph missed the contact that she had when Rachel was rubbing her back so her eyes followed her to the desk. _I wonder what she could be getting._ Steph was surprised when Rachel without removing her eyes from Steph sitting on the sofa thrust her hand into a drawer and removed a box of tissues. However what interested Steph more than the reason as to why Rachel would feel that she had to hide the tissues was the envelope that fluttered onto the floor before Rachel remembered that she had hidden it there before Eddie had walked into the room.

"Hi Davina, how are you?" Tom asked and instantly regretted it as he knew how stupid it sounded. _How is she supposed to feel when she believes that he fiancé is having an affair?_ Unfortunately she did feel the anger which Tom expected she would and she replied "Please tell me how am I suppose to feel when my fiancé is having an affair. I mean I thought I could trust him but instead it's happened all over again". Davina said and he voice got gradually louder due to the anger that she felt due to the belief that she had lost the one man that she loved more than anyone else. Tom looked very shamefaced as he knew what she was referring to and he wasn't sure how to tell her that she had got it completely wrong.

Rachel's eyes followed Steph and realised what she was looking, _great she has seen the letter but what can I say because I definitely can't tell her the truth but I just hope that she buys the excuse that I'm going to give._ Rachel bent down and picked the envelope up from off the floor and shoved it back into her desk drawer under the files which she knew that she wouldn't need for some time therefore there was no risk of a similar event happening so it would mean that the envelope contain was viewed before the ideal opportunity that Rachel created for herself.

"How about if your fiancé isn't having an affair" Tom suggested and due to the anger that she was feeling she didn't even consider that he may be dropping a subtle hint instead she believed that it was him trying to treat her as if she was stupid. "I'm not stupid Tom; I know you are having an affair with Rose Kelly because if not why are you spending so much time with her?" Although she had intentionally intended to make it a statement it seemed as though she was asking a question at the end of it. _I thought I could trust Tom but instead he just thinks that I'm stupid and I like how Rose has escaped trying to eliminate herself from the blame which is attached to having an affair. I guess at least it shows she feels guilty but I'm not sure how me and Tom move on from this; or if we ever will be able to._

Instead of answering her question, Tom just asked her another one; _great now he won't even give me the answers that I believe I'm entitled to_. "How long is it until we get married?" Davina was embarrassed that she had to answer the question due to the speed that she knew the answer; _shows how much it means to him if he has to ask me. "_25 weeks until 21st June"

"Hmm that's what I thought, how would you feel if I told you that I'm getting married in 6 weeks" Davina looked horrified as she stood up from off the sofa next to him. _I guess it is a lot to take in isn't it, _Tom thought as he smiled back at Davina and walked forwards to hold her in a warm embrace something that would take all the pain and suffering away from her.

What he expected was her to hug him back instead he pushed him hard in the chest until he was no longer coming towards her, "I thought that you loved me but instead you are planning a wedding with Rose Kelly". Davina said as the tears came spilling down her cheeks.

Tom almost choked; _how could she have got it so wrong,_ "Davina listen to me" Tom said as he took hold of her shoulders, "I'm not marrying Rose Kelly, I'm marrying you but I've moved it all forwards as I couldn't wait to marry you".


	14. Chapter 14

Part 14

"Rachel what's that?" Steph asked although she already assumed that she knew the answer as it wasn't hard to guess what would be in an envelope after Rachel had accepted that the shooting of Maxine was her fault. _After all my efforts last year trying to get Rachel to leave, the one time I actually appreciate Rachel and require the need for Rachel to stay, subconsciously I think me and Maxine may be the route cause as to why Rachel wants leave. If she does I will feel very guilty therefore I will do everything within my power to make her stay and I won't and refuse to give up on her. I pretty convinced I could find other staff members who would feel the same way; perhaps even Grantly is coming round to the idea of Rachel now although he still tries to maintain the pretence that he doesn't like her despite the new job which he has._ The determination that Steph felt this made sure that although Rachel may want to leave she would have to fight a lot of people to be granted the wish. _I know it's a cheap shot but if the worst came to the worst we would get the pupils involved and if that didn't serve to encourage, AKA; force, Rachel to stay I don't know what would make her stay, perhaps begrudgingly we would have to accept her decision and due to the way we value Rachel we would have to wish her the best in whatever she chooses to do. _

"What do you mean, all the times I've seen you with Rose" Davina asked as she couldn't quite believe that Tom had moved the wedding forwards and whereas she was contemplating calling the entire wedding off she was now facing the prospect that in 6 weeks she would be Mrs. Clarkson. _And I can't wait I just need to know whether he is sure because there was certainly a stage when I didn't trust him and I don't know whether that is a good start to the marriage. Although I love him and this gives the impression that he also loves me. I must be one very lucky woman and I will never forget it._

Eddie and Steph left Rachel and she withdrew the letter once again from the drawer which she had recently hidden it in. _I never thought making a decision would be so hard but I'm going to have to do it because it will affect my relationship with Eddie anyway so I might as well prepare for it now. It's just it feels as though it has only just started therefore I don't want to do anything rash that will end it but at the same time I have to do what is right by me and the school. _

"Yes I had to spend so much time with Rose because she was helping me to bring the wedding earlier but you know what I'm like I find it impossible to be organised therefore I had to get help and Rose said she had helped planned her friend's wedding so she seemed idea to the purpose that we required of her". Tom said as he lent forwards and embraced Davina as he was relieved that the 'secret' that he was harbouring hadn't affected his relationship with Davina.

Davina smiled as she smelt the familiar smell of Tom; _I can't believe that I didn't trust him and I was prepared to give it up. How stupid would I feel if they had to tell me the truth after I had needed it with him?_ She was broken from her thoughts by the sound of his voice, "you ruin surprises do you know that?" Tom laughed when he said it and he was relieved that she no longer felt threatened by Rose. _Although I should probably explain about the AA meetings to her soon or it will be a constant problem in our relationship and I couldn't bear to lose her because I love her and I can't wait to marry her. _

Rachel leant over her desk and removed the phone from its holder; scrolling through the list of contacts she found the name that would determine her future; Ralph Mellor,_ I only hope that he respects my decision and allows me to do it without me having to persuade him too much. _Pressing the call button Rachel was surprised when it was answered quickly; "Um, Ralph, would it be possible for you to come for a meeting at school to discuss the happenings of last week…" Rachel continued to finalise the details and although she hadn't directly announced his plans it was obvious that he wasn't going to need too much convincing. _Perhaps making this decision isn't going to be as difficult as I initially thought. But then at the same time Eddie hasn't agreed to it yet._


	15. Chapter 15

Part 15

The bell had recently sounded to announce the beginning of lunch and Matt was sitting on the sofa feeling incredibly downhearted. _I thought that someone would have remembered because I know that Steph has had other things at the moment but I would have thought that somebody such as Jasmine or Tom would have remembered instead it seems as though everyone has either forgotten or ignored it. I suspect the latter._

The rest of the staff came bounding through the door within the next few minutes as none of them actually wanted to be teaching as they were all still in holiday mode. Tom walked into the staff room with his arm snaked around Davina's waist; the public display of affection and the massive smiles which the pair of them wore on their faces caused the other staff members to look back at them as they were unaware of the recent developments which had taken place over the last few minutes therefore they looked back at the couple with a puzzled expression on their faces.

The couple noticed the room quieten when the pair walked in and they couldn't wait to tell them the answer as to why the pair of them were grinning almost inanely. Davina looked at the people in front of her and said, "You know we are getting married in a few months" Davina said which brought a smile to her face as she still found it hard to believe that although she was originally looking forward to the summer wedding the desire to become Mrs. Clarkson overcame her and she would get married to him tomorrow if it had been at all possible.

This comment caused the other staff members to nod as they were well aware of the situation for the pair of them. "Well we're not any more" Davina said as the smile on her face widened which caused the staff to look confused. _Surely they wouldn't be pleased that they are no longer getting married._ Steph who was intrigued by the reaction that their recent statement had on the pair of them caused her to say, "It's a shame that your not getting married because we had taken bets on whether your first child would be a boy or a girl so I'm going to have to pay the rest of the staff…" before Steph was about to continue, Davina interrupt her and smiled at the staff which were in front of her.

Bridget who had been waiting to ask if she was able to leave for an early lunch had heard the entire conversation with Ralph; _well the one sided side of it anyway. But from what I heard I know that it's isn't good news for the school as I'm sure that Rachel wants to leave, but what can I do about it or who do I know that would be able to alter the events that may follow…perhaps I know one person but whether Rachel will take any more notice of them then she would me is up for negotiation, but he stands more chance than the rest of us._ Bridget heard Rachel stand up from her desk and footsteps started to be heard moved towards the door; _I better pretend that I haven't heard anything as I don't think that listening to her conversation is part of my job._

"No Steph we are still getting married but we are moving it all forwards so what we are really asking is what have you got planned for February half term and do you fancy coming to a wedding. And before you ask Steph, yes there will be free alcohol". Davina stated which caused the other members of staff to laugh however Steph looked indignant, "anyone would think I only ever gossip and drink alcohol" she said as she looked around the staff to gain some moral support. However this support never came as her colleagues either re-directed their gaze somewhere else however Grantly was one for saying what he actually felt and his approach never spared anyone's feelings, "surely you are trying to imply your life revolves around anything else" he said and whereas he was expecting a few laughs from this comment it didn't bring any as the staff believed it had been unnecessary harsh and wasn't particularly that true. _Although they all tried to give the impression they didn't like Steph, the majority of the staff actually respected her and valued her as one of their friends whereas Grantly had neither._

Grantly's' comments lead to an awkward silence in the room where no-one knew how to break it. This led to the staff reflecting upon their own situation and for Eddie it was almost as though he was feeling resentment towards Tom and Davina due to the knowledge that he and Rachel would never have the open relationship that they experienced. _I wish I could wrap my arm around Rachel's waist and I wish that I could kiss Rachel without having to worry as to whether anyone else is watching and what the staff or pupils would think if they knew about our relationship. But the truth is I would like to let everyone know that I'm with Rachel Mason as I believe I'm the luckiest man alive but I would rather be with her instead of everyone knowing and it is over within the blink of an eye because at least with it just being the pair of us knowing it is secretive and special. Incredibly special._


	16. Chapter 16

Part 16

Sensing that this was as good a time as any to end the awkward silence which had descended upon the room Steph stood up and walked towards Matt carrying the present which she had acquired in the last free period that she had, and the card which the entire staff had signed.

_I was surprised that I managed to get all the staff to sign it and they all added to the collection; despite the protests from Grantly when he felt that the good money that he earned was being spent on other people rather than one the horses which he had spent the entire day circling possible candidates in the Racing Post. _Steph smiled at the knowledge that Fleur was gradually trying to stop and she thought she had succeeded in Grantly not putting money on the horse. _I wonder if Matt thinks we have all forgotten about his birthday._ She thought as she stood in front of him and saw the hurt expression on her best friends face.

Matt looked up as he saw his good friend standing in front of him, _I wonder what she wants because it's rather obvious that she hasn't remembered my birthday. I better try and give the impression that I'm not too upset by it._

"Hi Steph" Matt said as he momentarily lifted his head of the magazine which he had been flicking through.

"Hi Matt" Steph replied as she sensed the awkward tension between the pair of them. _Perhaps he does think that I have forgotten about his birthday; as if. I wouldn't want to pass on the opportunity to go to the pub…_ Steph stopped her thoughts abruptly when she remembered Grantly's previous comment which was the reason for the silence in the room. _Perhaps he is right maybe all I think about is alcohol but what can I do about it?_

Matt lowered his head and then continued to flick through the magazine as the hurt that he was feeling which was stopping him from able to take any information that the pages held. _I thought it might be a joke but it really does seem as though everyone has forgotten._

"Erm, Matt" Steph said which caused him to look up at her almost hopefully before remembering that she would probably have already remembered if she was going to. Therefore the hopeful feeling in the pit of his stomach vanished as he came back to reality and the knowledge that no-one knew or remembered that it was his birthday.

"Happy birthday" Steph said with the smile breaking through on her face as she was delighted that she had been able to maintain the pretence for so long, the smile that she was greeted with told her that she had been extremely convincing as he obviously was not expecting anything from the people that he liked to call his friends.

Rachel walked into the staff room and smiled at the picture which she saw in front of her. _Well it seems as though despite it being the first day back I haven't had any complaints from the staff and it seems as though they are all enjoying being back at school. If I'm honest so am I because it means that I'm able to right the wrongs which I believe have always tainted my past._

When Matt had opened his present, he and Steph hugged, as Matt was unable to believe, that she had managed to keep it a secret for so long and the fact that he had doubted his best friend. _I should have known that she wouldn't let me down._

Eddie looked up at the sound of her voice and was amazed that she had come into the one place which she used to avoid like the plague.

The staff turned around and faced Rachel as they were surprised that she was in the staff room as she very rarely entered apart from giving notices in the morning or chasing someone up who wasn't doing a very good job. Rachel smiled at the way that they all looked at her as she could honestly say that this was a social visit; _I don't want to stay alone in my office as I jut have images whirling about in my head but being with other people I'm preoccupied and distracted enough to only leave the memories in the back of my mind; ready to pounce forward with the first available moment._

"I just wanted to let you know that I will be buying the first round of drinks in the pub this evening in celebration for Matt's birthday". Rachel said to the group of teachers in front of her; to which they now felt a strong affection.

Rachel who now allowed her eyes to meet with Eddie's felt a pang of guilt due to not running the idea with him before contacting Ralph; _especially as it will affect him as well as me._

"Eddie can I have a word please?" Rachel said which brought a few surprised glances from the rest of the staff in particular the three gossips. As Eddie stood up and followed Rachel out of the staff room the gossips prepared to start letting their thoughts which had gone into overdrive to be publicly expressed to the rest of them.

Matt turned to Steph and immediately forgot his previous comment about gossiping being immature as he prepared to discuss his insight opinion on the two most senior members so what blossoming relationship.

"So then what do you think Rachel wants to talk to Eddie about?" Matt asked finding it increasingly difficult to resist the urge to run to the door and listen to what they were saying outside of it.


	17. Chapter 17

Part 17

Silence descended upon the room when the door flew open have expecting to see Eddie rushing through it with an angry expression on his face; instead it was Bridget. Another person who very rarely entered the staff room. Grantly leant over towards Steph who had now sat down next to Matt; holding onto his arm to prevent him from running to the door listening to the conversation which they believed was taking place outside. "They are all coming in today aren't they?" he whispered to Steph however this was heard by Jasmine and she quickly told him to shut up in fear of offending Bridget. _How annoying is Grantly, does he moan about everything and anything._

Grantly gave her a look enough to kill and the public feud between the pair of them was interrupted by the sound of Bridget panicked voice, "does anyone know where Mr. Lawson is?" she asked to the staff in the room but in response she only got another unhelpful comment for Grantly, "they all want to know where Eddie is. I'm guessing he has never been as popular" The rest of the staff laughed as Bridget hastily left the room with no more knowledge on his whereabouts then when she had arrived. _No wonder Rachel doesn't come in here very often, because she wouldn't be able to put up with them. I just hope I can get to Eddie in time before Rachel does something that we are all going to regret._

The staff looked at one another in confusion as they were unsure as to the reason why Bridget had come into the staff room in such a panic, "I wonder why Bridget wanted Eddie?" Davina asked which caused Grantly to snort with laughter, "She probably forgot the way that Rachel likes her coffee therefore she decided to ask Eddie" The three gossips laughed as this reunited the desire to speculate about what had happened between the pair of them. Jasmine looked at them confused, "but why would Eddie know?" The rest of the staff; well the three gossipers looked at Jasmine with distain. "You really don't know anything do you?" They asked and even the other teachers in the room had to agree that they had gained an insightful concept over the last few months of the ever-improving and rapidly changing relationship between the two most senior members of staff in the school.

"Just because I try and respect other people's privacy whereas you Grantly would exploit anyone if it would make you a bit of money" Jasmine shot back at Grantly as she was annoyed at the way that he trying to give the impression that she was very self-centred and didn't care about anyone else. _I can't stand Grantly I wish he put as much effort in his teaching as he did annoying me._

Before Grantly was able to respond Jasmine continued berating him and said, "If you took more time and attention doing your lessons plans then maybe you would be a better teacher and the pupils may actually learn something from you". Jasmine smiled after she had finished her little rant because she was proud of the way that she was now standing up to Grantly and the way that she was no longer going to be the teacher that the entire staff members ignored.

Grantly looked around the room at the teachers who seemed to be enjoying the entertainment which the pair of them were unintentionally providing. _I will show them that she is as stupid and pathetic as I know she is. How could she tell me how to be a teacher when I've been doing it a lot longer than her and she isn't even good enough to be a teacher assistant; I would go as far to say Miss Shackleton does a better job than Miss 'I'm always right' Koreshi. _

"Well maybe you should take some note from the pupils in this school as they seem to have a better idea than you because they soon realised that everything isn't about hard work". _Lets be honest modern pupils often realised this as soon as they started school and the further that they go through it, the more the idea is established into them._ The other staff looked back at Jasmine to see her reaction to Grantly's recent comments but she seemed amazed by the furious attack that he had just undertaken on her. _I knew we didn't see eye to eye but that seemed incredibly harsh as not only is that insulting me but it is also insulting the pupils who come here and personally I believe they put a lot of effort into school and they encourage me to come to school every day. The best day for this school will be the day that Grantly retires from teaching; I will suggest he has a leaving party as we will never need to see his miserable face again._

Rachel and Eddie walked to her office in silence as Eddie was confused about Rachel's expression as he didn't understand why Rachel would need to talk to him especially as it seemed a serious conversation that she was about to have with Steph shortly after he left. _I hope it hasn't put Rachel back in her recovery as she seemed to be making progress because I know that she was anxious when she came back in September and I just hope that Steph reassured her that no-body blames Rachel for what happened to Maxine as I don't know how many more times I can tell her and she will believe me._

"Eddie there's something I need to tell you" Rachel said as she faced Eddie and took a deep breath preparing to tell him something which could cause a massive argument between the pair of them. _I just hope he doesn't take it too badly._


	18. Chapter 18

Part 18

The conversation in the staff room had come to an abrupt end due to Jasmine having no reply to Grantly's last comment. _I wish I could have said something to make Grantly seem stupid but that would make me as bad as him wouldn't it?_

So once again the staff members were divided into the separate friendship groups with Matt and Steph sitting in the corner contemplating what Rachel could want to tell Eddie. The pair of them immediately stopped talking when anyone came near them but they were unaware of Kim standing behind the pair of them.

"Steph, I think the only way that we are going to make any money from the bet about the pair of them is if we set them up ourselves because if we leave them to get on with it. Nothing will happen and we will end up paying Grantly and have to accept that we aren't Waterloo Road's finest gossipers". Matt said with an incredibly serious expression on his face but this turned to confusion when he heard someone laughing behind the pair of them, despite her best efforts to suppress the laughter that had been building up ever since she gathered the information which told her the topic that they were talking about.

_I don't know; I'm not here for a year however the place is still exactly the same well apart from Andrew. I wonder if he is going to come back, I wish we had sorted the argument out before I left to come back here because at the moment I doubt that I will ever see him again._

The pair of them turned around as they felt threatened by the person who had joined in on their conversation without their knowledge. _And I thought me and Matt were good at listening to other people's conversations but it appears that Kim is even better. I wonder if she gained any knowledge about the relationship between Rachel and Eddie when she went to the welcome back meeting with the pair of them this morning because I didn't when I went to talk to Rachel but then I wasn't really in the mood to try and identify the feelings in the room because all I felt was hurt. However I still didn't manage to tell Rachel the full story as it felt too uncomfortable telling a woman who I previously despised all my problems perhaps I would be better off telling Matt as at least he understands me better._

"What is the matter Rachel you are starting to worry me now?" Eddie asked with compassion in his voice and he hoped that this would get some reaction out of Rachel because the anxious expression hadn't disappeared from her face instead she was trying to disguise it with the expression she often used to give the impression she was 'fine'.

"So what are your opinions on the relationship between Rachel and Eddie then?" Kim asked as she had overheard enough to know this was what the two members of staff were talking about. Matt looked back at her surprised; _how does she know that's what we were talking about. I swear she must have a sixth sense. But they don't really exist do they, I better ask Steph later._

Steph smiled as Kim had seemed to have forgiven her for the interrogation that she was subjected to earlier in the day, mostly about the noticeable absence of Andrew. "Well you see that's the thing we don't know what is happening but we have an ongoing bet which…" Steph was stopped by the smile which was starting to spread upon Kim's face. _They never change but I'm surprised it's not a bet to determine why I have returned without Andrew because I'm convinced that she was trying to get as much information out of me as possible this morning however I refused to tell her._

"Well…"Rachel started talking and then paused as she didn't quite know how to continue the conversation as there was so much that Eddie didn't know about as he had no idea about her reoccurring nightmares or the thoughts that filled her head every time that she walked down the one corridor where her lungs always felt as though they restricted her breathing leaving her breaths ragged and uneasy. _But I refuse to rely on Eddie any more than I absolutely need to._

"Well?" Eddie said as he tried to encourage Rachel into continuing as he knew that she would need a bit of gentle persuasion to continue in explaining something that would be hard for her.

"The thing is I don't know if I can do it" Rachel said as the tears started to glisten in her eyes.

Eddie looked back at her concerned; _it looks as though she needs even more support and I will offer it her because I can't and won't let her leave because me or the school wouldn't survive without her and I'm not prepared to try for one minute._


	19. Chapter 19

Part 19

"What can't you do Rachel" Eddie asked as he found it hard not to walk up to her and wrap his arms around her telling her that everything would be fine and he would help her through it. _But I don't think that will help Rachel as I need to be able to look straight into her eyes as although I don't want to have to work without her I believe that her happiness is more important so if she doesn't want to stay at school unwillingly I will have to accept her decision._

"This" Rachel said as she waved her hand around the office and this only served to confuse Eddie further; _she isn't being very descriptive here is she? Does that mean she can't be with me or doesn't want to stay here?_ The confusion was noticed by Rachel when she looked back in Eddie's eyes and immediately felt guilty for what she had implied and the apparent interpretation that Eddie had taken of it. _He must think I want to break the pair of us off before we have really begun but I don't think I do, perhaps a break would do us good though as I need to get myself sorted out before I'm able to begin a proper relationship where I can be totally committed as at the minute I have other problems going on and although it appears the school isn't blaming me for the incident before Christmas I can't help but blame myself._

Steph stopped as she realised what Kim was thinking and noticing that this was a smile rather than a frown Matt decided to try and push Kim for information whereas Steph looked confused at the way that when Matt had first come to Waterloo Road he wasn't particularly very interested in gossip as he kept himself to himself but since he had been with Steph for about a year he had learnt certain tips and he now seemed to seize the opportunity which Kim had presented.

Seeing the expression on Eddie's face, Rachel felt that she needed to justify the reasons and make sure that Eddie was clear with what Rachel was trying to say. She decided to try the best policy and began looking deep into Eddie's eyes while she was talking hoping that he wouldn't notice the tears that were beginning to fill them as it hurt her physically to say the following comments.

Steph looked bewildered at Kim as she reeled off a load of questions which Matt provided the answers to; 'have you got any prove that they are together', 'are either of them with anyone else' and 'what signs have we had that the pair of them have feelings for one another'. Steph had sat in silence while Matt answered all the questions that Kim was firing at the pair of them however she was thinking; _I wonder what happened at the New Years Eve party because I remember them sitting next to one another and then Eddie whispered something in her ear._ Steph smiled as she thought of various phrases which Eddie could have said with some taking on a completely different meaning to others. _Perhaps I had better think of something else as I don't really want to speculate what Eddie had whispered to Rachel but I do remember that Rachel laughed when he said it but I wouldn't say that is any firm prove that would show a relationship between the pair of them and I'm convinced it wouldn't get any money out of Grantly as he did say we needed photographic proof. _Little did Steph know that they had already had the moment when she would have been able to take the photograph that 60% of the staff would gain financial reward from?

"No Eddie, please listen…I'm scared" Rachel said as Eddie stepped forwards and took Rachel in his arms as he could see the pain that she was feeling and it physically hurt him as she was the love of her life and he only ever tried to make her happy by making her life easier for her but as it was it seemed as though it was only making his life harder and the decisions that she was trying to make seemed to be incredibly harder due to the affection that Eddie was showing her. _I wish he wouldn't treat me this well as I don't know how I will manage without him but I can't recover if I'm continuing to try and hide my feelings and emotions from Eddie as I know that I will only push him away when I have recovered as it will remind me of times which I would rather forget. I know that I would do it for a fact because it is what I always do; whenever anything gets hard, Amanda Fenshaw/ Rachel Mason, runs, its what happens; it is almost expected now._


	20. Chapter 20

Part 20

Rachel leant her head against the comfort of Eddie's chest; _I know it isn't going to help in the long run but I need one last moment where I will be able to do it as I don't know whether we will ever get to the relationship we have at the moment but I have to do this as it will only come back to haunt us later on._

"Rachel what are you scared about?" Eddie asked as he gave her small frame a tiny squeeze as though he was trying to commit to memory the feel of her against him almost as though he was pleased that he was able to hold her like he was at the moment. _I never thought that me and Rachel would have this type of relationship particularly due to my opinions on her as soon as she arrived but when I think of the blossoming relationship between the pair of us I smile as I know the massive progress that we have made._

"Steph!" Matt called as he looked directly into her eyes to end the recollection of the events of the New Years Eve party. Steph looked annoyed as she knew there was something that she was forgetting about the evening but she couldn't quite remember what it was, _I wish I hadn't got so drunk because I could had taken a greater interest in the relationship between the pair of them so I would have been able to take a picture and if I needed to I would be able to change it slightly on Photoshop to make it show what I require of it. I know it's cheating but it's not as though we will ever see Rachel true emotions and feelings is it because I know that she will try her hardest to keep them hidden._

Steph looked back at Matt and he looked as though he was expecting an answer, "I'm sorry I didn't hear the question" Steph replied to an expectant Matt and Kim. To a certain extent Matt looked worried and this was shown when he started speaking "Kim wants to know why we want to know whether Rachel and Eddie are in a relationship" Matt said quickly wishing that Steph had an answer because he hadn't and Kim would of refused to help them if she knew that it was for a bet. _I suppose I had better use my creative talent then and come up with a plausible excuse that will encourage Kim to aid us in our quest, I don't want to deliberately lie so I will just try and alter the truth slightly so I'm not exactly lying but at the same time I'm not telling the whole truth._

Rachel pulled away as she felt the contented sigh from Eddie's lips as he was pleased with the way that Eddie had been so readily accepted and the way that she came to him when she needed comforting; _it's not fair on Eddie and I refuse to do it._ Eddie looked at her confused but she decided rather than commenting on his confusion she would continue the conversation which they had previously been saying. "I'm scared because I don't trust myself any more" Eddie looked horrified at this statement as he was used to Rachel Mason being strong and confident in her views but the woman standing in front of her was weak and almost fragile. Her small waist only re-enforced this opinion and it was almost as though Rachel's fighting spirit was no longer there; her desire and passion was missing and this was the think that Eddie was first drawn to. _Perhaps I will be able to help her get it back as I know that this school still needs Rachel as I doubt we would be able to function without her._

"We want them to admit to their feelings because they have both had so much sadness in their life's that we feel they deserve a bit of happiness and as their staff we can see the attraction which the pair of them have but it seems that neither of them will either admit to them or act on them therefore their staff will give them a little bit of help". Steph said and she and Matt had to agree that although this wasn't the original true story it was something that they both secretly thought. _It is true Rachel has been through a lot and she does deserve someone to look after her and I don't know who would be better than our very own respectable deputy._

Kim seemed to like the reply as she smiled at the blonde headed woman and said, "ok that seems a convincing enough reason to get me involved". The three of them sat on the sofa in the corner concocting plans as to how they would get Rachel and Eddie to face up to their feelings for one another.


	21. Chapter 21

Part 21

"But Rachel I trust you" Eddie said with total honesty in his voice as he wasn't prepared to let Rachel go without a fight; _although I suppose she hasn't actually expressed any desire to leave yet, which is something positive for the school. _Rachel couldn't help but smile back at Eddie due to the knowledge that every word he said was something he believed in as he believed in Rachel and the potential relationship which the pair of them had.

"That's not enough though is it?" Rachel said as the tears started to fall from Rachel's eyes and she sunk into the sofa almost as though she had been defeated; physically and mentally. _I don't know how to tell him because I know however I do it, it is going to hurt him something that I never wanted to do but now it is a reality. I just hope that he survives when I have done it._

Eddie saw the tears that were falling down Rachel's cheeks and he admitted to himself that he couldn't stand to see the state that Rachel had got herself in. _If I didn't know that I love her I definitely know now due to the aching that I am feeling in the pit of my stomach with the knowledge that she is hurting and there is nothing that I can do about her perhaps I will have to continue to reassure her because I know that she requires confidence and support and I promised that I would be the one that would give it to her._

Eddie sat down on the sofa next to Rachel and put his arm around her shoulder's gently pulling her towards him until once more she was resting her head on his chest. _At least she is somewhere where I can keep her safe and give her the support that she needs as having Rachel near me with my arm around her is the way that it should have been for a long time I just hope that Rachel feels the same way and doesn't reject me when I ask her out for a meal later tonight so I can talk about 'us'. I Rachel surprised herself at the way that she didn't shrink away from the contact of Eddie however she later acknowledged it was most likely because she was to tired and no longer had the strength to fight anyone; let alone Eddie; the man she knew she loved but was unable to._

"Well how about you don't make any rash decisions today as you have so much more to offer the school as it wouldn't be the same without you…" Rachel interrupted Eddie when he was talking as she did a slight laugh when he said how it wouldn't be the same when she had left. The tears were restricting Rachel's ability to talk therefore Eddie used this to his advantage as he said, "no Rachel I'm telling the truth, you have made so much progress with the school and I wonder what made me want to come ever day when you weren't here because being totally honest you; Rachel Mason, is the reason that I come to school. As I know that you will be here and I use any excuse in the morning to see you". Eddie and Rachel smiled at one another because despite Rachel cursing herself fro showing her emotions towards Eddie she was unable to stop herself as for the last few months she hadn't had to hide what she felt and she liked it. _I never thought that I would be able to be honest and open with my feelings but Eddie allowed me to do that and it is the most wonderful thing that anyone has ever done for me I just hope that he knows that._

Perhaps it is the right time to tell him how much I appreciate what he has done for me, "Eddie" the sound of his name from her lips meant that he lifted his head from the top of hers and looked straight into her tear stricken eyes. "I want you to know that what you have done for me over the last few weeks has been the best thing that anyone has ever done for me". Eddie laughed slightly as the room seemed to take an uncomfortable turn, "it seems as though you are ending it with me" Eddie said which caused Rachel to avert her eyes away from Eddie's as she couldn't stand to see the hurt in his eyes.

"Oh" Eddie said as he knew from the reaction that this brought from Rachel meant that he was ending it with her. Rachel stood up from the sofa as she couldn't stand to be so close to Eddie when she knew that this was breaking Eddie's heart and hers but it was something that Rachel had to do to save the relationship before it had started properly. _I have to sort myself out before I ruin the relationship to such an extent that it will never be able to start again. _

Tom and Davina weren't particularly interested in the speculation about Rachel and Eddie's impending relationship; _well they hoped it was impending because they both unbeknown to the other one was preparing to win some money; in Tom's case he was set to win £100 with the excuse that it would have been able to go into the wedding fund._

"So then Tom how long have you been planning to move the wedding forward then?" Davina asked him as she still couldn't quite believe that Tom had done it all for her and she would be Mrs Clarkson in a few weeks. _Have I ever told him how much I love him?_

"Well I love you and I couldn't wait so one lunch when you were marking Grantly's books for him I was talking to Rose about how I wish it could have been brought forward. Rose then told me that it could be arranged as she was friends with someone who had brought their entire wedding forwards so I made a few arrangements for us" Tom replied as he leant forwards as his lips met with hers.

Eddie was hurting but he knew that at the same time there were reasons behind it and thing had to be said as they both knew where they stood. "Is it something that I have done?" Eddie asked as he was conscious that he had pushed Rachel too far to quickly so it resulted in him looking into her eyes trying to contain the tears that were threatening to spill from his own. _I don't think it will help if I start crying because even if we can't have a relationship I know that I will always be here to look after her and give her any support if she needs it because I know that who does end up with Rachel with be a very lucky man even if it can so obviously not be me._


	22. Chapter 22

Part 22

Grantly walked into the room and said, "Can't you give it a rest?" he said as he spotted Tom and Davina kissing in the corner. The other staff members who were preoccupied in their match-making schemes turned around as they were unaware of the public display of affection which Tom and Davina were showing.

Steph sighed as she considered whether to rise to the bait that Grantly offered therefore on the opinion that today he was being extremely annoying she said, "Grantly if you don't like it you can leave because I don't think any of us would notice whether you were in the staff room or not" The staff looked at Steph surprised as they thought that her and Grantly were close friends and it seemed as though Steph was finally getting as annoyed with Grantly as everyone else was. _Lets be honest the best contribution that Grantly made was when he was wearing his ridiculous clothes last year when he was trying to become a teacher motivator however it seems as though he has stopped that now so it isn't even possible to laugh at him for that now._

Rachel saw the hurt expression in Eddie's eyes as she knew the news which she had delivered had hurt him deeply. _I hope that I haven't hurt him too much as I really do love Eddie but not at the moment as things aren't clear in my own head at the minute and I need time to myself to ensure that I will be able to sort myself out. And I won't bring Eddie down with me when I go on the quest which will ether make or break me. I just hope that I'm strong enough to get through it, as by releasing Eddie I am getting rid of the support network that I knew I could constantly rely on last year._

"No Eddie, it's not you, its me" Rachel closed her eyes and took a deep breath as she was annoyed at herself for using one of the most used clichés which didn't hold much meaning or significance to the person that it was delivered to.

Eddie smiled at Rachel trying to show that there were no hard feelings and although he was disappointed he didn't want Rachel to believe that she didn't have anyone she could rely on; _because over the few months that I have been closer with Rachel I have realised that she actually needs support and as her friend and the person that loves her deeply I promise that I will put my pain to one side and I will be here to support her._

The bell rang which signalled the end of lunch and for Eddie it had proved to be a very painful lunch as he had just realised that despite him not actually ever being able to call Rachel his, he had managed to lose her. _I wonder if I can use the bell as an excuse to leave her office because I really don't want to cry in front of Rachel as I don't want to make this any harder for her than it already is because I know she doesn't feel the same way as me. She probably never did but she was too scared to tell me that she didn't feel the same way perhaps she got caught up in the moment and the desire to have a family I seemed to be the perfect man as I have a son so she could have a family as it is. I can't blame her because I know that she wants a family and what I do know is that the man that does eventually have a family with her will be a very lucky man however it is blatantly evident that it isn't going to be me._

"I'm sorry Rachel but I have to go as I have books that need to be marked for next lesson" Eddie said as he stood up from the sofa which he had been left sitting on by Rachel and walked towards the door.

Rachel looked upset as she sat down at her desk almost wishing that Eddie had made it harder for her. _This relationship seems to have ended as quickly as it began but I suppose that is for the best and I'm grateful for Eddie not making it any harder for me._

"Ok" Rachel said and then realised what she was doing and the way that she was going to let Eddie walk away without having a memory that was going to pull her through even the darkest nights.

Eddie opened the door of Rachel's office wishing that she was going to say that she was joking but even Eddie knew that Rachel wasn't this good an actress therefore he had slowly come to accept the situation that he was facing. "Eddie wait" Rachel called out to him as he was about to step through the door. Rachel stood up with the tears beginning to fall down her face despite her best attempts to contain the tears she had failed miserably so the tears were rolling down her face.

Eddie held his arms out and he indicated for Rachel to walk into them however she seemed rooted to the spot therefore he walked back into the office and took a step towards Rachel until he was holding her in his arms. _This is the place where Rachel should belong but I can understand that she doesn't feel the same way._

Eddie pulled away from Rachel and used his thumb to wipe the tears away from her eyes; carefully resisting the urge to kiss Rachel he decided to commit all of her features to memory due to the fear that after this day he may never have been able to be like this with her readily accepting his help.

"Rachel if ever you need anyone to talk to I'm here for you and I always will be" Eddie said gazing into Rachel's eyes as these were the one place where he was able to be alone with his thoughts without having any concerns in the world particularly as the way that he was able to be so close to Rachel it meant that she trusted him deeply. _I just hope that never changes._

With this comment Eddie smiled at Rachel; used his thumb to wipe the tears that were once more falling and then he left the office so he didn't need to maintain the image of strength any longer.


	23. Chapter 23

Part 23

When Eddie shut the door it meant that the tears which Rachel had managed to stifle resulted in the tears flowing down Rachel's face at a steady pace. _That was most definitely the hardest thing I have ever had to do and I never want to have to do it again. _

Eddie was storming through the corridors as he was taking his anger out on everything and anything, therefore the pupils who were dawdling to their lesson after lunch bore the brunt of it as he was shouting at them to get to their lesson quicker and how they should remove the gum out of their mouths and to sort their uniforms out. _Even shouting at the pupils didn't seem to help the aching which I am feeling at the pit of my stomach. _Seeing another victim Eddie called "Bolton get to lesson now" he shouted down to the end of the corridor to Bolton and Paul who were both walking slowly to the classroom which they were suppose to have.

"Don't worry sir, we're goin' but the bell only went two minutes ago" Bolton tried to defend himself as he was walking towards Eddie and unfortunately for Bolton he had intentionally believed that Mr Lawson was joking with the sharp tone that he used as even the pupils had noticed that over the last few weeks the two most senior teachers were in an improved mood, however it quickly became apparent that he wasn't

"No the bell went nearly four minutes ago now get to lesson or go to the cooler" Eddie said lowering the volume that he was speaking but it was still was louder than was actually necessary for the distance that he was speaking as Bolton was practically standing next to him

Bolton opened the door opposite Eddie and walked into the classroom and turned to face Paul, "Wonder what's the matter with Lawson today?" he said as they couldn't understand the sudden change which had happened to their deputy head.

Eddie felt that he had stamped through the corridors enough therefore he retreated to his office where he was able to gather his thoughts with the knowledge that today's events would have made a massive impact on his life. Opening the exercise books in front of him it wasn't long before the maths became blurrily as the tears started to fall from his eyes as he no longer needed to maintain the pretence that he was strong and that he accepted the decision that Rachel had made admittedly he respected it but he confirmed to himself that he would never accept it.

The three gossips left the staff room and the three of them went their separate ways to their classroom as Kim went to her office with Steph and Matt going to their respective classrooms. _I do hope our plan works as I convinced that Rachel and Eddie have feelings for one another but they are refusing to admit to them therefore they require help from The Three Musketeers._ Steph smiled at the nickname which she had concocted for the three of them as she was obviously pleased about their progress over lunch. _A good thing about recruiting Kim is that the rest of the staff know what me and Matt are like however they don't know that Kim is going to help us therefore it means that she will be able to get information for us without the staff suspecting anything as she can claim it is to get back into the swing of things. I think she is a very good recruitment and I'm proud of our work to persuade her to work for us even if she doesn't know the total truth. _

Rachel was sitting on the sofa as this still smelt of 'Eddie', Rachel inhaled deeply as she knew that this would be the closest that she would allow herself to get to Eddie for a long time. _As it will take all my self-control not to run towards Eddie's classroom and tell him that I love him, but I can't do that as I won't let myself as in the long run it won't help me to recover however hopefully when I recover me and Eddie will be able to start again; well if Eddie still wants me._

A knock on the door awoke Eddie from his thoughts and the memories of days which he had spent with Rachel; the happiest days of his life however now it seemed as though there was a dark hole in his life where the love seemed to fill instead there was hurt and a feeling of disappointment. _I love Rachel how am I going to survive without having Rachel in my life and the ability to call her mine._

Half of Eddie hoped that it was Rachel coming to tell him that he had made a terrible mistake and that she wanted to give them another go however the realisation kicked in and he knew that this was unlikely to be the case.

Looking towards the figure of the person at the door and Eddie was immediately concerned when he saw that it was an anxious looking Bridget. _I wonder if Rachel is ok as she seemed to be in a bad state when I left her but I know that if I hadn't left when I did I knew that I would never be able to._


	24. Chapter 24

Part 24

Eddie beckoned Bridget into the room as he was concerned about Rachel as it was unusual for Bridget to come to Eddie's classroom. _I wonder why Bridget would want to come into my classroom I suspect I will find out soon._

"Hi Bridget is everything okay" Eddie asked as if it wasn't important Eddie wanted to get rid of her as quickly as possibly as it felt as though his heart was broken with the knowledge that he had managed to lose Rachel and he didn't even know what he had done wrong. _I think that is probably the worst part about it as I can't apologise and make it up to her because I don't know what I have done that would cause her to break up with me. I thought that we were great together as I was obviously wrong._ Although Eddie was trying to stop the bitterness filling his thoughts he couldn't because the anger was filling his head due to disbelief that the pair of them had finished their relationship without the knowledge as to what he had done.

The sound of the response broke Eddie from his initially fears that something was the matter with Rachel as Bridget replied; ""Yes, I think so but I have something to tell you". However she paused before she told Eddie because she had noticed that his eyes were watery almost as if he was about to or had been crying. _I wonder what is the matter with both Rachel and Eddie; I thought they were getting on well particularly the number of times that Eddie has gone to her office during the last few months I'm pleased to say that he has been looking to for her but now it seems as though something terrible has happened. I wonder if Eddie already knows what I am going to tell him?_

The pause that Bridget left resulted in Eddie believing that it was a question which he needed to answer and as it didn't seem to be able to improve the situation that he currently found himself in he replied, "I'm sorry Bridget but I'm busy would it be possible for you to tell me later?" Eddie asked as he was still quite emotional and he wasn't really in the mood for a conversation with anyone at the moment. _ And I really don't want to cry in front of Bridget as that would make in awkward for the pair of us particularly if she went back to Rachel and said how I was upset to Rachel as then she would feel even more guilty as I know that even though she was being honest that wouldn't have been easy for her to do._

Bridget looked back at Eddie confused as she was just to him being accommodating for others therefore she was surprised when he asked if she could come back later. _I know he doesn't look as though he is in the mood to hear this now but if I don't tell him he may never know and it may result in Rachel leaving as it will be too late to do anything about it. At least if Eddie knows we may be able to stop her going, _"Well not really Eddie because it is about Rachel"

The sound of Rachel's name immediately got Eddie's attention however he looked confused as he didn't understand why Rachel would have sent him when she had just ended the relationship which the pair of them had.

"What does Rachel want me for?" Eddie asked as he presumed that Bridget would be following the instructions of Rachel therefore he didn't quite understand why she would want him back as wouldn't it make it harder for her, _that's one reason why I respected her decision as I want Rachel to be happy more than anything in the world. As I love Rachel and her happiness means everything to me even if the only way she can be happy is if I sacrifice my own._

Bridget looked confused at the way he seemed to be avoiding Rachel; _I thought Eddie always wanted to help Rachel but now it seems as though the one time that she needs him, he seems to be avoiding her. _Eddie saw the confused expression and decided to enlighten Bridget, "well I've just been with Rachel and she didn't say anything about wanting me" Eddie said and despite the unknowing Bridget he was aware of the double meaning that this held. _She doesn't want me to help her now and she certainly doesn't want me to have any other part of her life._


	25. Chapter 25

Part 25

"Well she doesn't actually want you" Bridget started to look incredibly sheepish which caused a confused expression on Eddie's face once more during the short conversation that the pair of them had. Bridget realised that she had to explain despite the awkward situation that she now faced. _Somehow I don't think Mr. Lawson will approve but to a certain extent I'm pleased because I would have never known if I hadn't listened and she may be leaving at least this way we can stop her. _Eddie listened to what Bridget had said; _well that's great she is in trouble but even then she doesn't feel as though she can come to me for help, I thought our friendship meant more than that but obviously not. _

Bridget saw the angry expression on Eddie's face; _Rachel told me once that when Eddie is angry, it is better to stay out of his way but it seems as though I will have to ignore her normally excellent advice today, _"What I mean is she doesn't know I heard the conversation but Miss Mason is in trouble and needs your help".

Immediately Eddie looked concerned and Bridget knew she had his attention.

_Well one think is for certain, Eddie defiantly has feelings for Rachel although he probably hasn't told her this because they are both scared about the other one I will have to see what I'm able to do but after what I'm about t do I wonder whether Rachel will ever want to listen to me again. Perhaps I'm not doing the right thing but Eddie deserves to know rather than just hearing in morning briefing; 'Hi everyone, today will be my last day' because that would be dreadful as I would also like to leave if Rachel ever did which is a shame because I love my job but Rachel is the person who makes it worthwhile coming every day; she is the person who makes my job enjoyable and I'm convinced that other people think the exact same thing as me._

Bridget began explaining about the days events and the way that she was going to go to lunch so she was standing by Rachel's door when she heard that Rachel was on the phone to someone; "I didn't mean to listen but I was waiting until the conversation was over and I was going to ask her if it was possible for me to leave however I heard that she was arranging a meeting with Ralph Mellor" Eddie looked mystified as to the reason why Rachel would willingly accept Ralph into the school particularly as she hates him so much. _If Ralph has threatened Rachel I will personally ensure that he never steps foot on this property or anywhere near Rachel again._

Eddie nodded at Bridget to be continue as she was a bit reluctant knowing that what she had done was highly unprofessional and was convinced that Eddie wouldn't have been very impressed due to the angry, hurt expression on his face.

Steph had finished devising her plan therefore she started walking towards Matt's classroom; _great he is teaching it looks as though I will have to go it alone unless I manage to round up other teachers who are prepared to help. Let's see who are the choices that we have; Jasmine, I don't think so as she always keeps well away from any type of speculation on Rachel's and Eddie's relationship at one point I even questioned whether she was jealous of the pair of them. There is Tom and Davina but I know the pair of them are planning their wedding in 6 weeks time; I wouldn't mind if someone did that for me but the closest that I'm going to get is security Dave and at the moment I have to focus all…the majority of my attention to Maxine. (I can't stop every hobby can I? And as I have given up giving into the demands of my followers who all wish that they fell into the category that I require from a man , I have to maintain some light-heartedness and I've decided that the three gossipers will maintain a healthy business with me in charge._

When Eddie was convinced that he knew all the facts he slightly interrupted Bridget just to clarify his understanding, "so she doesn't know that you heard this conversation with Ralph?" Eddie asked and in response he had a shake of the head from Bridget who was reddening due to embarrassment that she had betrayed her friends trust like this. _She trusts me to do my job and not to listen to her conversations but here I am listening to them and even worse I am repeating them to other members of staff._

True to her beliefs the staff were already busy or they weren't interested in match-making; _although I prefer to use the term 'aiding in their relationship'_ therefore Steph surveyed the options that she had available; _1) go it alone and maintain the impeccable reputation of 'The Three Gossipers_' _or 2) wait for assistance and hope that were are able to still provide the public with the service that they know and expect from us because after all we have a reputation to uphold._

Eddie stood up and said, "Don't worry Bridget, I'm going to sort it out now" as he started to walk towards the door, she looked confused at the way that he was going to manage it therefore she asked, "Why what are you going to do Mr. Lawson?" The worried expression on her face could have shown that she knew the event within the day were risking her job however for Bridget it was more than that as she had acted on impulse by coming towards Eddie as she knew the implications for the school if Rachel was ever to leave. _For me she made it into a safe environment which you are pleased to publicly announce that you work here._


	26. Chapter 26

Part 26

Creeping down the corridor with her plan in mind, she reached the corridor before Eddie's classroom, _3,2,1, the three gossipers are go. As soon as she thought that, _Steph berated herself; _fancy a grown woman coming out with a phrase like that and I don't know why I'm creeping down the corridor almost as if I am on a secret mission. I must pull myself together and hope that no-body saw._

Unfortunately Steph wasn't so lucky as she saw a flash which caught the corner of her eye; slowly turning round on fear as to what she would see; her heart missed a beat when she saw the majority of the louder students; to be specific; Janeece, Maxine, Bolton and Paul all holding out their phones and using the latest technology videoing her little secret mission down the corridor_. Great how do I explain that now?_

Eddie was fuming as he left his classroom; _I can't believe that she wouldn't tell me that she has organised a meeting with Ralph Mellor. I know we have just split up. _Eddie even winced when he thought about it. _But I would have still thought that she would want to consult me about decisions which affect the school but obviously not. Eddie Lawson is insignificant to Rachel once again, as she thinks she knows best and is determined to go it aloe; well not this time because I'm not going to stand by and watch her make a massive decision which will not only affect her life but the entire schools._

Steph hastily straightened herself up and walked swiftly down the corridor in an attempt to drown out the laughter that was filling the air through Mr. Budgen's classroom; _I starting to agree with Jasmine; if he spent longer planning his lessons then the pupils wouldn't be bored and they would never have spotted that embarrassing incident._ Despite Steph trying to tell herself that it would be forgotten within a day; the reality of the situation was that it would be being blue toothed among the pupils already and as a result it would be around the school faster than her own gossip chat line. _And dare I say; that's quick, perhaps technology is the way forward._

Steph was walking down the corridor towards Eddie's classroom when she heard a loud commotion coming towards her; _I wonder who has annoyed someone and why do they need to take it out on the wall. I'm betting that it's Eddie as he doesn't seem to have been in a bad mood for a couple of weeks. Strange that because Rachel has also been in a good mood since the New Years Eve party but then nothing could have happened because me and Matt would have noticed as we wouldn't have missed anything that would have been in front of us._

Tom and Davina were oblivious to the noise around them; particularly from outside the staffroom as Eddie was continuing his trail of destruction. Davina looked concerned at Tom and said, "do you think that we should go and see if we can do anything?" which caused a smirk from Tom as he was considering the options which he had available to him. "No I don't think so because we are preoccupied as it is". Davina looked perplexed at Tom; _what is he on about it's not as though we have to go anywhere is it?_ Unable to prevent herself asking Tom, she said, "what do you mean, we're not exactly doing anything that couldn't wait until another time are we?" This caused Tom to laugh as he stood up and held his hand out for Davina to take. "Come on, we have somewhere to be" he said which caused Davina to look interested in the surprise which was planned for her. _I wonder where we are going but then we could be going anywhere as I know now that Tom is very good at keeping secrets._

Eddie was still cursing down his breath when he turned around the corner sharply and walked into Steph; he quickly reached his arms out and steadied her to prevent her from falling. When Steph had regained her balance she said, "Slow down Eddie" but at the same time she was still in Eddie's arms therefore she thought; _now I know why Rachel likes being in Eddie's arms as you feel incredibly safe and although I didn't quite see it before there is something about Mr. Lawson…Steph Lawson. _Steph paused in her thoughts to consider what she was saying; _nah Rachel Lawson sounds better and I will stand to make a better deal out of it due to the fifty pounds that I will get from Grantly and the free drinks at both the engagement party and the reception. _Steph smiled; _Rachel can have him which reminds me I had better continue in my plan as it looks as though I can start the ball rolling. _

Davina looked at Tom confused when he was practically dragging her to the car park during the lunch break, _okay it's lunch but we aren't suppose to leave school without telling anyone and as I'm trying to revise to ensure that I qualify as a teacher and I don't see how sneaking off with my fiancé. _Davina smiled when she said that as she still couldn't quite believe that it was happening, "Tom where are we going?" Davina asked as Tom gestured for her to get into the car by opening the door for her, "don't you worry; it's a surprise" Tom replied and at that moment Davina was convinced that she wasn't going to get any more information out of him.


	27. Chapter 27

Part 27

Eddie coughed as he was quite uncomfortable at the way that Steph was looking at him in a way that could almost be described as; _well I think the best word to describe it would be; loving, but then Steph doesn't feel like that about me does she. But one thing I know for certain is that if it was Rachel who was looking at me like this, then my heart would be soaring and I definitely wouldn't be feeling uncomfortable. But I have to come back to reality and accept that me and Rachel is never going to happen but then I suppose that I have to move on but I doubt that the person that I should move on to is Steph. Somehow I doubt it as I definitely don't have any feelings for her I guess I will have to let her down gently._

Tom stopped the car in what could only be described as the middle of no-where, this caused Davina who was slipping into a contented sleep to open her eyes as she had felt a prolonged stop and the loving eyes of Tom gazing at her. However she was surprised when her eyes readjusted to the light because rather than expecting to be somewhere that could be considered as a surprise she seemed as though they were preparing to do hill walking due to the large number of hills that were in front of them and in the distance.

"Where are we?" Davina asked as she wasn't looking forward to the potential walking trip which she believed was facing her; _I wish that I had protested as rather than revising he is making me walk around the countryside; in these heels…I don't think so._

"So Eddie what are you going to do about Rachel" Steph asked and for the moment Eddie didn't think that it was strange how Steph knew about Rachel leaving, "well I don't know what can we do?" Eddie asked and it was only when Steph was answering did the reality of the situation hit him and he questioned; _how does Steph know that Rachel is leaving; or does everyone know and I'm the last one to find out; laughable that when you consider that I used to think that I was the closest to her. _"Rachel's too good to resign…" Eddie wasn't interested in anything else as the sentence was resounding in his head. _It's was fine when no-one else said it because I could pretend that she wasn't going but then how does Rachel know because if she hasn't told me or Bridget how has Steph managed to extract this information from Rachel because I know that they are closer now but I wouldn't exactly say they are best friends._

Tom rushed out of the car and ran around to the passenger side to open the door for Davina; "come on Madame, your surprise awaits" Tom said and he was determined to stop speaking there to ensure that he didn't give too much information away. "We haven't got to walk up that hill have we?" Davina asked as she didn't want to spoil the surprise that Tom had devised for her but she knew that she would never be able to walk up it in the shoes that she was wearing; _he could have warned me this morning that these shoes probably weren't the best pair to wear today._

"Don't worry Davina, I have planned for that" Tom responded as he left Davina sitting in the passenger seat and retreated to the boot of his car; _why doesn't that fill me with confidence?_

"Hang on Steph, how do you know that Rachel is leaving?" Eddie asked trying to contain the anger which was at risk of spilling out due to the impending danger that all the staff knew before him and as he was the one who it affected the most then he should have been told first. _At least the rest of the staff only lose a boss whereas I lose a boss and the woman that I love with all my heart at least even if we can't be together I can look after her and ensure that she is safe but if she isn't living in the area I won't be able to do that._


	28. Chapter 28

_Part 28_

"Well I when you left the office me and Rachel were talking however it got quite emotional so…" Steph paused at the way that Eddie honestly looked pained when Steph had said that Rachel was upset. _He must really love her so I can report back to the TTG that we don't need to persuade Eddie that much so it seems as though Rachel must be the one that may need all the persuasion; not as easy as Eddie do to but you mustn't underestimate the pervasive powers of TTG._

Eddie looked at Steph which encouraged her to continue; "So Rachel went into the office drawer and pulled out the box of tissues but there was also an envelope which I can only assume was her resignation particularly as she was saying how she didn't have anything left to give to the school"_. _Eddie interrupted Steph and said "I hope you assured her that there is plenty more for her to offer the school" Eddie said with the anger being obvious in his voice which Steph instantly detected.

"Yes Eddie; of course I did but I don't know if she is going to believe me so we need someone who respects her to tell her and tell her that her leaving the school will be the worst decision that she has ever made" Steph replied implying that Eddie is the person who best suited the criteria that was required.

Eddie seemed to agree with Steph's interpretation due to the way that he excused himself from the conversation with Steph and said, "I think that somebody has to stop Miss Mason from having it all her own way". With this remark Eddie strode down the corridor; but the main difference now as to hi previous journey down the school corridors; before talking to Steph; was that he wasn't as angry as this had been changed to determination to ensure that Rachel wouldn't be allowed to slip away quietly. _If I get my way she won't be slipping away at all. _In Eddie's head he had a voice that seemed to be telling him; _Pull yourself together and go and see Rachel telling her that you love her because even if she doesn't feel the same as me I can make sure that she is aware of my feelings in no uncertain terms._

Davina was confused when she saw Tom walk towards the boot of the car; _what would he have in there which would mean I don't have to wear my heels._ What Davina didn't expect was that Tom had still kept his old walking boots in the back of his car ever since he had gone on the outwards bounds trip with Eddie and the disruptive boys. _I wonder if she will agree to wear these then but it's not as though she has much choice if she doesn't want to wear her shoes. _ Davina saw what Tom was carrying and wanted to point-blankly refuse to wear them; _but how can I, it's not as though I can wear anything else. _

Eddie saw Rachel's office door and decided that it was now or never. _Come on Eddie you can do this; just imagine what your life would be like if you didn't see Rachel every day_. Eddie knocked the door and waited patiently until there was a response from Rachel within the comfort of her office. The sound was muffled but the response came and dutifully Eddie opened the door and entered her sanctity. Rachel turned around from the window and shoved the tissue back into her pocket; _I'm not going to let whoever it is see me upset because I have to pretend that I'm fine although I can't imagine who it is because the person who normally comes into my office now hates me._ On turning around to acknowledge the person's presence, Rachel was surprised to see that it was Eddie; _I never thought it would be him because I was convinced that he left quickly because he couldn't stand to look at me, so I wonder what he is doing here. _As soon as Rachel realised it was Eddie she was finding it hard not to smile at him because normally when Eddie entered her office he somehow had a knack at always making the situation seem better than it did before his perception on the issue; _but not this time, I hope I can act professional enough in front of him._

"Hi Eddie, how can I help?" Rachel asked and despite the formal, professional front that she was trying to portray this even sound a little withdrawn from the situation almost as if they were no longer friends. _I couldn't stand it if I was no longer friends with Eddie so I had better change my tone._ Rachel felt as though she had been punched in the stomach due to the hurt expression on Eddie's face. "The rest of the teachers aren't that scary you know so you have to come in here…not that I object" Rachel said as laughed; _ok I'm trying to be friendly but I have to ensure that I don't give Eddie the wrong impression._

"Rachel I know" Eddie said with a stern expression which showed he wasn't interested in light-hearted conversation with Rachel. _I don't want to be too harsh as I love Rachel and I don't want to risk her pushing me away but if I'm not forceful enough then she will ignore me and brush my concerns off; if that happened she would never know how I actually feel about her at least this way she will have a good indication._

Rachel tried looking innocent at Eddie; _perhaps he doesn't know anything I will try to give the impression that I haven't got a clue what he is talking about_ "What do you know?" Rachel asked and her heart missed a beat in the suspense that was created while she waited for the answer from Eddie.

"I know that you are resigning but don't want anyone to know" Eddie said rather bluntly which caused an awkward silence to be cast in the room.

Rachel's eyes filled with tears and she didn't know whether it was due to the realisation that she wasn't going to be able to slip away quietly, the harsh tone that Eddie was speaking to her with or the fact she wasn't sure how she was going to live without Eddie in her life.

"Sit down Eddie, I think I had better explain" Rachel replied as she and Eddie made their way to the sofa in the corner of Rachel's office.


	29. Chapter 29

Part 29

Tom walked back to the passenger's seat and held the pair of walking boots out towards Davina, "I have these if you want to wear them" Tom suggested with a smile on his face knowing the reply that this was going to be greeted with, "No Tom I don't want to wear them can't we do the surprise somewhere else so I don't have to climb up the hill because you could have said that I had to do walking this morning because then I could have worn better shoes" Davina complained which caused Tom to shake his head throughout; "no I'm sorry we have to go over the hills to get to where we need to. But we have two options; you can either change your shoes and walk yourself or I can carry you" Tom said which caused Davina to laugh, "I doubt you are man enough to carry me Mr. Clarkson. It was then that she came up with an idea which meant she had to do neither of the two unimpressive options; _but I wonder if it will work._

The silence surrounded Rachel and Eddie as they sat in her office on the sofa and neither of them knew what to say that would break the impending silence which was hanging around the office like a black cloud. _Perhaps I had better just start by explaining to him about my decision but then if he has only found out from Steph I can prove to him that it isn't true and then I can pretend that I'm not leaving; until I get confirmation from Ralph Mellor that I'm allowed to be as he doesn't like me anyway I don't see why it should be a big problem as I doubt he will want to keep me at the school._

Davina said to Tom, "Get in the car then because it will take me a while to change my shoes and it's cold outside so you might as well stay warmer for longer". Unwillingly Tom walked around the car and got back into the drivers seat. Davina took the walking boots off him and threw them into the back of the car; Tom who was shutting the car door didn't notice the thud and then was soon distracted by the feel of her lips upon his own. _Good it seems to be walking because I will delay it for so long that he will decide it's not worth it to go walking and we will be able to go home in the warmth._ However unfortunately for Davina, Tom realised what she was doing, and as a result he pulled away from the kiss, "I'm sorry Davina, as nice as this is, we still have somewhere which we have to be.

When he looked around the car he saw his boots in the back and saw the glum expression on Davina's face, "come on, you're not getting out on going so you might as well start to prepare". Tom was aware that Davina wasn't very happy with him but _it will be worth it in the end._

"So who told you that I was leaving because whoever it was got there information wrong" Rachel said which caused Eddie to look at her confused; _why is she lying I thought we respected each other enough to tell one another the truth but here she is lying about it. I guess she just doesn't respect me at all._

Eddie didn't reply however Rachel continued talking as she could still see the pain which was evident on his face; _e must think that I'm lying but I'm not; I'm just not being entirely truthful at the moment. Because as it stands I'm not leaving, I am just hoping to._ "Let me guess, Steph came to tell you that I was leaving because she saw a letter in my drawer" Rachel asked and the anger was quite apparent due to the way that Eddie felt as though he couldn't trust her; _but then I haven't given him much confidence to trust me at the minute though have I. _

Tom and Davina both got out the car but with different reactions to the impending trip; Tom was looking forward to the trip as he always enjoyed any time with his fiancé however Davina was unimpressed as she was wearing Tom's walking boots and his old coat which smelt musty due to it being left in the boot of his car for a few months. _What must I look like? _Davina thought as she began the summit up the hills.

Rachel stood up and walked to the drawer which was containing the letter, she opened the drawer and withdrew the offending item; walking back towards Eddie she handed him the letter and said, "Here read it, if you don't trust me". Eddie looked shamefaced that she knew that he didn't trust her therefore he reluctantly removed the letter from the envelope but he was surprised when he opened it as it wasn't what he had expected to see; as rather than a letter from Rachel it was one addressed to her from the hospital. _But why would the hospital be contacting Rachel?_


	30. Chapter 30

Part 30

Eddie read the letter and was more confused after reading it than he was to begin with. _I still don't understand why the hospital would be contacting Rachel. Perhaps I had better ask her._ Eddie looked towards Rachel who was now gazing out of the window and unknown to Eddie she was furiously wiping away the tears that at one stage were streaming down her face.

"Why does the hospital want you to go in for an appointment?" Eddie asked and on hearing Eddie's voice Rachel dried her remaining tears and turned around to face him. _should I tell him the truth or should I cover it up with another lie; either way it still amounts to the same thing; that Eddie didn't trust me but then I'm not giving him any reason to because I'm not being entirely truthful anyway; as I'm not going to explain my meeting with Ralph. _

Davina was getting more and more dishearten as she continued the summit of what she now considered to be a mountain. _It doesn't help that his stupid boots are too big so it feels as though my feet are going to keep slipping out of them. I don't understand why we have to climb mountains when we should really be in school._

"Tom can't we just stop here because I don't want to have to climb any further as my legs are hurting" Davina whined hoping that Tom would give into her demands however he was being stubborn and refusing to. "No I'm sorry love but we have to get to the top, don't worry it's not much further and it will be worth it in the end I promise you". Tom continued striding of to such an extent he was so far away her voice didn't travel far enough for him to hear her continued campaign about not going up the hills. _It had better be worth it as my legs will be so stiff I won't be able to walk for weeks._ Davina was suddenly stopped in her thoughts as noticed the mud that was surrounding the pair of them had suddenly thicken to such an extent it now had a vice grip on 'her' shoe and despite her best efforts to remove the shoe from the mud it was stuck. _Great what do I do now?_ She thought as she looked towards the distance and saw that Tom was continuing to make strides towards the top of the hill. _Which seems to be the biggest hill that I have ever seen; I'm convinced that he has done it on a purpose._

"The hospital want me to go for an appointment because…" Rachel paused as she was finding it hard to get the confidence to tell him. Eddie immediately noticed this and despite the short time that the pair of them had spent together over the Christmas holidays, Eddie had become an expert at reading and interpreting Rachel's moods and expressions. _Perhaps she needs a bit of prompting_. "What do the hospital want you to go for an appointment for" Eddie was hoping that he would ask the questions and Rachel would provide the answers however this didn't seem to offer Rachel any more encouragement to continue._ Better try a change of tactic then, perhaps this will encourage her to talk to me more._

"Rachel if it is anything bad, I promise we will get through it together. I will be by your side ever step of the way" Eddie said trying to coax her into looking in his eyes although he had believed that he had failed as throughout the speech she hadn't looked at him; her heart had soared when he said that he would help her, only for her to come back to reality; _you can't rely on Eddie to help you because you pushed him away so this is something that you will have to deal with on your own._

Steph ran back towards Matt's classroom and explained about the recent events and the way that Eddie has feelings about Rachel particularly when he heard that Rachel was leaving, Matt stopped in his thoughts "Rachel's leaving?" he questioned as he knew that she would be blaming herself for the incident with Maxine but no-one expected Rachel to be leaving especially when she had come through harder things; like last year, the revealing of her past and the fire, they thought it would be impossible to remove Rachel from her position but instead she was willingly leaving.

"Well yes…at the minute but Eddie is in her office at the moment trying to convince her otherwise" Steph replied with a crestfallen expression as previously she would have believed that she was losing the opportunity to win some money but for the pair of gossipers it actually ran a lot deeper than that as they had both come to respect Rachel due to the way that she faced up to her past and got on with her life making a future for herself. _Not a bad role model for the pupils of this school as it goes fairly well with the school motto 'everything from nothing'. Let's just hope that Eddie helps Rachel to see sense. _


	31. Chapter 31

_Part 31_

"No I'm sorry Eddie; I can't let you help me because it's not fair on you. You have your own life to lead as you need to look after people that you care about the most" Rachel said as once more the tears started to spill down Rachel's face; the only difference this time was that she didn't make any attempt to stop them. Eddie looked at her and it pained him; _how can she not realise that I like helping her and she is someone who means a lot to me._

"Well then, Rachel it seems as though if I follow your advice I have to look after you because you are someone that I care about. So are you going to tell me what is wrong" Eddie smirked at his reply because he knew that there was no comeback to that as he had followed Rachel's advice and he knew that Rachel actually needed help and support. _So she is going to need to let me help her whether she wants me to or not._

Tom was surprised how quiet it had suddenly gone as he could no longer hear faint sounds of Davina complaining about how her legs were tired and she wanted to stop. _She is worse than the kids. _He decided he had better look around and see what was taking her the time and he was astonished when he saw that she was stood still and wrestling 'her' shoe back from the mud. He couldn't help but to laugh at the sight of her but when she shot an angry expression in his direction did he rapidly change his expression and started walking back down the hill towards Davina. "What's the matter you seem as though you are stuck?" Tom tried to ask with a serious expression on his face as he was finding it incredibly hard to suppress the laughter at the sight of her getting increasingly muddy.

"This was a stupid idea" Davina almost shouted back at him as she was frustrated at the way that he was dragging her up the hill although she had explicitly said she did not wish to go. _I bet it isn't worth this hassle and I really can't be bothered to continuing climbing; I'm going to suggest to Tom that we go home._

"Come on Tom, can't we go home and leave the surprise for a time when it isn't so muddy" Davina almost pleaded with Tom; _I hadn't better say that I'm not planning on doing it ever again had I? It might have a better reaction if he thinks we may be doing it again some time._

"No I'm sorry Davina we have got this far we might as well carry on now" Tom replied and he instantly knew that this didn't go down very well with Davina but he couldn't help it because he was convinced that she would love it as soon as they got to their final destination. _All I have to do is get her to the top of the hill and then she will forget all of the pain that I put her through to get to the top._

"Well you see, this isn't the first appointment I have had at the hospital as I had one shortly after the fire when they diagnosed me with exhaustion; telling me that I needed time to recover as the physical scars weren't healed properly and the mental scars were just setting in rather than being healed at all". Rachel was relying the information back almost as if it was happening to somebody else and she was just telling Eddie the information. Whereas Eddie looked pained to hear what she was saying, she had an expression which worried Eddie; it was almost as if she had stopped fighting and was resound to the fact that her past had shaped the future in the respect that it was bleak and going nowhere.

Eddie looked in Rachel's eyes and saw the hurt that he was causing by making Rachel think about events which she would rather keep to the back of her mind; unknown to Eddie they were creeping closer to the forefront of her mind with every passing minute throughout the day and during the night they never left the front. _I could kill Steph for telling me that Rachel was leaving by a letter because I would never have barged in here if she hadn't and I wouldn't be causing pain to the woman that I love; with all my heart. But what can I do to make it better as the pain has set in and every day it must hurt more as the memories compact upon one another. If only there was something that I could do to take all the hurt away from Rachel but I doubt that there is._

Eddie asked the question which was confusing him the most, "so why are the hospital asking you to go back when you have already been diagnosed surely they can see that you are coping as you are doing a great job with the school" Eddie closed his eyes when he said the last line; _what did I say that for it gives the impression that I don't care what she is going through and I only care about the damage limitation to the school. In truth that couldn't be further from the truth as I love Rachel and if I had to make a straight choice between the school and Rachel, she would win; no doubt about it. I tried to praise her; give her something to be proud about but instead I have given the impression that I don't care about the pain which she is daily going through._

Rachel looked back at Eddie surprised when he said the last line as she wasn't aware that she was as good an actress; _but obviously I must be it give the impression that I'm doing okay because the memories in my head are constantly waiting to jump to the front and it seems the harder that I try and suppress them, the more they want to finish me. To think that I had won the battle when I survived the fire. Just goes to show that the saying is right about the battle and the war; I wonder what better position the school would be in if I hadn't won the battle with Stuart Hordley; lets be honest it couldn't be much worse than it is at the moment._


	32. Chapter 32

Part 32

"Well aren't you going to help then?" Davina asked as she was getting frustrated at having to stand on one leg while trying to pull 'her' boot out of the mud which was putting up a lot of resistance. Tom who was trying not to laugh at the sight of his fiancé getting covered in mud was enjoying the entertainment that she was offering as she was getting more and more frustrated at the boot. The tone of her voice snapped his from his thoughts and he immediately bent down beside her; "why don't you let me have a go" he asked trying to sound as sympathetic as he could muster considering that he found the whole incident amusing. Needless to say, Davina wasn't very impressed with the reaction Tom had to the incident therefore in a lightly acidic tone she said, "it's nice of you to offer considering that you are the one responsible for the situation anyway".

"You are coping aren't you?" Eddie asked as he was concerned that Rachel hadn't replied to his recent comment therefore he was wondering whether she was contemplating if it was possible to tell him her feelings, "because if you're not I want you to tell me because I want to be able to help you as like I say we can work through it together" Eddie said as he looked into Rachel's eyes which were still filled with tears; _I wish it was possible to tell him but the barriers around my heart stop me; perhaps it's possible to tell him snippets which if he cares another he will be able to piece together and understand the problems which I have._

Rather than replying Tom believed it was a more worthwhile exercise to retrieve the boot and then continue walking up the hill; _or the time that we get there will be so later the sun will have set and it will be time to go home again._ "Shall we just call it an evening and go home because it's cold and muddy…" Davina had a moment of inspiration; "how will the Chlo and Donte get home if we aren't there to take them?" she asked believing that she had devised the perfect way for the pair of them to leave the cold murky hills behind but instead Tom had formulated a response as he had prepared himself for such a question; "sorry you're not getting out of it that easily because I told the pair of them that we would be leaving school early so they said that they would walk home" Tom cheered as the boot which was covered in mud was released from the tight hold and he held it aloft almost as though it was a trophy.

"Yeah I'm not doing too bad, it just" Rachel stopped as she was finding it hard to say the words which would reveal so much about herself. _Come on Rachel, you can do this, I mean it's talking to the man you love….care about._ Rachel corrected herself as she knew that if she allowed herself to believe that she loved Eddie she would never be able to set him free and she would require to much of his time and patience therefore he would be neglecting Michael. _And Michael has to be his main propriety as it's not my right to take his dad away from him and I love Michael too much to cause him any hurt. I wouldn't want to be the cause as to why Michael feels he never had the love of Eddie because I never felt I had the love of my parents and it still hurts._

Davina looked on in horror at the sight before her eyes, as was expecting Tom to speak and she wasn't disappointed "See it isn't that…" Tom was interrupted by Davina, "don't say it" she said with a look of disgust of her face; _how could he possibly claim that the shoe isn't that bad there is no way that I am putting my foot back into that boot. It took enough courage to earlier never mind the fact that it is now covered in mud._

"So then how are you going to get up the hill then?" Tom asked and immediately Davina wanted to reply "I'm not" but on examining the hurt expression on Tom's face she decided that this possibly wasn't the best response particularly as this was supposed to be a surprise. _Although I don't like it much and it seems as though I am trying to make it go wrong; which I'm not intentionally, but it just is._


	33. Chapter 33

Part 33

"What do you mean it isn't too bad?" Eddie asked once more trying to coax some information out of her; _I understand that it is hard for her but I want her to know that when she is ready to talk I will always be ready to listen._

"Well it's just that I can't walk down the one corridor" Rachel was feeling uncomfortable explaining all this to Eddie standing at such a great distance from him therefore she walked back towards him; who was still sitting on the sofa. Eddie looked mortified when she said this; _how didn't I notice, I love her and I didn't notice the pain that she was going through instead I chose to force a relationship upon her; no wonder she called it off her just wasn't ready. How could I be so selfish towards her?_

Rachel noticed the guilty expression on Eddie's face; _I do hope she isn't blaming himself because I deliberately tried to keep it from him and for a certain length of time I would say I was managing to deal with the problem. I had accepted that I wouldn't walk that way but it is due to the dizziness and the lack of appetite which is starting to worry me now._

"I'm sorry I don't know Davina replied; almost begging Tom to say that they didn't have to bother although he obviously wasn't going to say that, "Ok I've got a plan but you are going to have to close your eyes" Tom said which caused Davina to look mystified at him. _I wonder why he wants me to close my eyes, I don't know if I trust him completely._

Tom sensed the hesitance and said "you have to trust me because if you didn't we wouldn't be getting married" Tom knew that Davina wouldn't be able to claim that she didn't trust him because she obviously did_. I just wonder what he is going to do._ "I'll warn you know Mr. Clarkson that if you put that muddy boot on my foot; the wedding is off" Davina stated shortly before she reluctantly shut her eyes.

"Eddie I'm scared" Rachel said as she sank into the sofa and let Eddie's arms surround her. _I hate seeing Rachel like this because it is something I have never seen before but she looks so weak and fragile almost as if she is going to snap through the events which are happening to her. But what can I do about it? I want to support her but whether she will let me is another thing._

Eddie pulled her tighter to him and breathed in the smell which was so typically Rachel; _I have to be strong for her even if it is killing me to be this close to her but knowing that she is no longer mine and probably never will be again but I will accept that if I could take this pain away from her._

"Rachel, tell me what to do and I will do it" Eddie replied trying to give Rachel confidence and assuring her that she isn't on her own; _I just hope that it is enough._

"I'm not sure what you can do Eddie" Rachel replied honestly because she knew that the problems she was suffering where in her head and it would be incredibly hard for Rachel to allow Eddie into her head and let him help her. _But if Eddie is prepared to try I am prepared to let him. _Rachel saw the hurt expression on his face again and wanted to know what she would be able to say to make him feel better, Rachel stood up as she couldn't stand to see the hurt expression on his face for another time during that day. _It makes me wonder why Eddie wants to come to my office as whether he does all I do is hurt Eddie; I wish it didn't have to be like that but what can I do about it?_


	34. Chapter 34

Part 34

However Rachel was pulled from her thoughts as suddenly Eddie's voice seemed far away and the darkness was starting to overcome her. Her eyelids started to droop, she placed her hand to her forehead and noticed that it was extremely sweaty and then suddenly it was all dark.

"Rachel!" Eddie shouted as he jumped off the sofa and ran towards her catching her before she fell to the floor. _What is the matter with her? _Eddie was starting to panic as he seemed unable to wake Rachel; _what do I do, I can't leave Rachel but then we need an ambulance and I left my phone in my classroom; how could I be so stupid. Come on Rachel, I need you, please don't leave me._

The next thing that Davina knew was that she was suddenly lifted in the air as Tom had picked her up and started marching up the hill with her in his arms. "See Davina, I should have probably done this in the first place because it would have been a lot quicker" Tom said as he laughed at Davina who in a strange way seemed contented in his arms. Davina didn't refuse therefore Tom said "Oh I get it now, you wanted me to carry you up the hill didn't you because you wanted my strong arms around you" Tom joked as before Davina had noticed they had already nearly reached the top of the hill.

Davina was going to protest that it wasn't true and that she was quite capable of walking up the hill by herself but in reality she quite liked being in Tom's strong arms_. Although don't tell him that._

Eddie had gently lowered Rachel to the floor and about to remove the phone from the holder on Rachel's desk when he saw Rachel's eyes start to flicker; placing the phone back on the desk, Eddie focused all his attention on Rachel. "Come on Rachel, you can do it; fight back" Eddie said as he was relieved that Rachel was regaining consciousness, he heard someone enter the area outside Rachel's office.

"Help" Eddie called to the mystery person; they came rushing into the office and it was Bridget who had returned from her lunch break; she was worried to see her friend looking so pale lying on her office floor. She noticed the tears that were slowly gliding down Eddie's face, "Mr. Lawson, have you phoned for an ambulance?" Bridget asked trying to restore some order and ensure that Rachel would be getting help as quickly as possible. Eddie shook his head and once again focused his attention on Rachel, whose eyes were flickering open albeit slowly.

It was only when they neared the top of the hill did Tom look at Davina and said; "I think we have got past most of the mud so if you want to put your shoes back on because there is something which you need to see" Tom said which caused Davina to swing herself to the floor and place her feet in her shoes. _I wonder what it is that has been the cause for me to have to walk up the hill._

Davina walked up the remaining bit of the tree and was amazed to see the scene in front of her; _wow I never thought that Tom would do this for me._

Rachel who was conscience of making a fuss tried to sit up and if it wasn't for Eddie holding her down she would have probably been standing up and starting work again. "No Rachel, stay there, Bridget has called an ambulance" Eddie said forcefully because he knew that this was the only way that Rachel was going to listen to him. _I was so worried about Rachel; perhaps this is the best time to tell her that I love her._

"No Eddie, I'm fine, let me get up" Rachel tried to get up once more as she wasn't sure she wanted to go to hospital as it would drag up memories that she would rather forget. _I can't go to hospital as I hate it as it shows me everything that I hate about my past._

Eddie shook his head, "you are going to hospital, and before you mention the school I will be here to look after it". Eddie put his hand underneath Rachel's legs and lifted her onto the sofa and placed a cushion underneath her head as a pillow. Eddie leant forwards and said, "I will look after you" as he then kissed her on the forehead.

On the floor there was a picnic blanket which held a picnic basket and a bucket which contained iced champagne. "What have I done to deserve this?" Davina asked as she was amazed at what Tom had done for her. "Aww Tom, have I today you how much I love you?" Davina asked as Tom took her hand and led her towards the picnic blanket which was spread across the grass.

"No not recently I don't think" Tom replied which caused Davina to lean towards Tom and kiss him. _I'm so lucky to be marrying him and I can't wait._ The sight on the hill was amazing as you could see for miles with the view representing everything that was good about Britain. Tom laughed and said, "I can now understand why Mika used to care so passionately about the environment.

Davina agreed as they both absorbed the surroundings as neither of them knew of anything to say as they both had exactly what they wanted. _I think in certain circumstances either the person with the most perfect vocabulary do not do the occasion any justice and I think this is one of those times._ Tom put his arms around Davina as she relaxed into them; the two of them were pleased that they were with the person that they loved.


	35. Chapter 35

Part 35

It was nearing the end of the school day and Rachel was still lying on the sofa in her office; much to Eddie's displeasure as she had refused to go to hospital. _Why do I need to go to hospital for them to tell me what I already know; 'you are working to hard Miss Mason, you need to take a couple of weeks off work to enable your body to recover from the stress that you are placing it under, both physically and mentally'._

_I know they will tell me that but I can't leave the school for a couple of weeks because I still have to repay the pupils due to the danger which I placed them under due to allowing Earl to stay at the school but then no-one else would understand that because they aren't the one that is harbouring the guilt._

Davina was still resting in Tom's arms as they sat on top of the hill; watching the sun set. "Tom, why did you do this for me?" Davina asked as she was still amazed that the man's whose arms she was lying in was the man that she loved and couldn't wait to marry.

"Well it's because I love you and I wanted the pair of us to have some time to ourselves where we don't have to pretend to be anything we're not" Tom responded which caused Davina to smile as she couldn't believe that she had previously been jealous of him and Rose.

"Aww you're soppy aren't you" Davina replied with a smile as she leant forwards and kissed Tom; making it if anyone was watching the pair of them, they would see Tom and Davina kissing in front of the setting sun.

Eddie finished marking the paper work that Rachel claimed which she had to stay to sort out. "As I'm not going to let you get up from that sofa, you may as well leave the school and go home" Eddie said although he knew that he would never get Rachel to agree with him, particularly as she wasn't impressed that she was being made to lie on the sofa all afternoon and every time that she tried to move from the sofa Eddie rushed to her side and pushed her down again.

"I'm sorry Rachel but I'm doing it for your own good and you should accept that I'm not going to let you leave my sight as I want to make sure you are safe and this is the only way I can do it". Eddie said forcefully as he knew that if he left Rachel she would start working again which wouldn't doing her health any good. "You should be pleased that I've not forced you to go home" Eddie said and looked away before she shot him an angry expression, something he knew he would be receiving due to his comment.

"How can I leave, I need to get the paperwork done" Rachel said choosing not to mention that she had a meeting with Ralph Mellor later on that afternoon after school had finished. _I don't think he would be too impressed but it's not as though I organised it because it was the governors as they wanted a response, by the governors due to the incident involving Maxine._

"Well I will do the paperwork for you then" Eddie replied as he knew that this would mean that Rachel wouldn't have any work to do. Although she didn't want to Rachel smiled at him; _Why would Eddie volunteer to do the paperwork because I know that he hates doing it therefore he must really care for me. Just shows that I shouldn't have let him go but then I needed too as it's the only way I will get better; to build my barriers once again and I promise myself that I will never let anyone infiltrate them again._

"But you won't know the system which I have" Rachel said trying to make any reason she could come up with to prevent Eddie doing the paperwork and to enable her to do it. _I never thought that I would be taken prisoner in my own office._

"Then you will have to tell me what it is then because I'm not going to let you do it" Eddie replied and he confirmed Rachel's belief that this was another battle that she wasn't going to win. _Perhaps I had better accept that he is just trying to look after me but I want…need to be independent. _

"But I'm quite capable of doing it myself and it's not as though you actually want to do it is it? because I know that you hate doing paperwork so you might as well let me do it" Rachel insisted hoping that the more she said it, the more Eddie was going to agree but in reality it was causing him to dig his heels in even further. _I don't care what she says I'm not going to let her do any work as seeing her collapse worried me and I'm not best pleased that she refused to go to hospital but it's a start, stopping Rachel from working._


	36. Chapter 36

Part 36

"But your not capable are you because what would have happened if you had collapsed in assembly, how worried would the pupils be if you collapsed in it" Eddie said and he was speaking from the heart as he knew the whole school would be worried if Rachel collapsed as there wasn't anyone who didn't like her, but Eddie knew that Rachel would not appreciate him saying this.

Needless to say, Rachel; was annoyed at Eddie and sharply responded, "that's not fair, you should know that everything I do is for the benefit the school and I would never deliberately put anyone in danger" the tears started to glister in Rachel's eyes as the pain from last term shot through her body again. _How can I claim to do everything for the school when I put them through potential danger?_

Eddie walked towards Rachel and wrapped his arms around her hoping that he was offering her, his strong and determination to get her through the pain which she was suffering. _I know that Rachel is stubborn I just hope that it gets her through the events giving her the will-power to succeed rather than the stick to beat herself with, causing her to lose herself in the person which she believes she has become due to the mistakes that she has made._

Matt and Steph were still discussing Steph's success in the staffroom when the other teachers entered and as many of them had an economic gain from the potential developments they were all interested to hear Steph's news.

"So then Stephanie, are you prepared to pay up yet because it is obvious that Mr. Lawson would never reciprocate any feelings that the lady of the night held for him". Grantly said as he walked into the staffroom preparing to make himself a drink in the corner. As he had his back towards the rest of the staff he failed to see the annoyed expressions that his recent comment was greeted by; some were too infuriated to say anything that would have made an proper sense and the others were all waiting for the attack on Grantly to start so they would have been able to join in.

Eddie noticed how quiet it had gone from Rachel's direction; _either she has accepted the fact that I'm not going to let her move or she has fallen asleep. _Eddie decided that he should check if Rachel was okay, therefore he quietly stood up from the chair and looked at the mountain of paperwork that he had managed to complete. _Now I understand why it takes Rachel so long to complete, therefore perhaps I had better help her more. If I help her with the paperwork I will be a better deputy for her and it would give me a reason to be with Rachel, as if this is the only way that I will be able to be near her. But for me this is enough, of course I would love to be in a relationship with Rachel but I know that it isn't what Rachel wants therefore I have to respect her decision._

On closer inspection he could see that Rachel had fallen asleep, _it probably the best thing for her as her body is trying to tell her she needs a rest but Rachel being Rachel thinks that she knows best. H_e left the office to face a blanket from the first aid kit. On entering back into the office he placed the blanket over Rachel and kissed her forehead; "don't worry Rachel I will look after you" Eddie told a sleeping Rachel as he smoothed her hair from off her forehead and took a step back away from Rachel watching her sleep. _I really love Rachel as she is the woman that I love so I'm going to care for her and make sure that she gets through whatever problem is causing her to feel ill. I just hope she knows that I'm here for her and it is something with no strings attached so she feels comfortable to ask me for help._

It was Steph who felt that she was unable to let this comment lie therefore she replied, "you would do well to remember that Rachel is our friend and I defended her against her own sister therefore I will have no qualms about defending her against you". Steph replied which caused the other members of Staff to stand behind Steph almost as if they were a form of back-up for her. Grantly looked at the expressions between the teachers, "I suppose you feel the same way about our illustrious leader do you" he asked with the resentment that he felt for her burning through as he was unable to believe that he; someone who had been there for years was having an ex-prostitute being more popular than him. _How very insulting. _


	37. Chapter 37

Part 37

It was starting to get cold sitting on top of the hill and despite the fact that Davina still had Tom's strong, loving arms around her; the cold was still getting to her causing her to involuntary shiver. _I love the fact that it is just the two of us but it is really cold up here now._

Tom noticed the extreme shivering of his fiancée; _I think I had better get her back home, I just hope that they have had enough time to set it all up as I'm surprised…and worried that I haven't received a text yet._

"Shall we go, because it's freezing up here" Tom suggested as he removed his arms from around Davina's waist and the pair of them got to their feet. Tom packed everything away in the picnic basket and then carried it with his left hand enabling him to hold his right hand out for Davina to take. _I don't think that I had better complain on the way down as I guess that I was rather annoying on the way up the hill._

Therefore Davina was happy to walk through the mud as she was looking forward to the future as she was marrying a man who she loved like no other and he felt the exact same way about her. _I don't think I could wish for much more._

Eddie looked at the clock and noticed that there was only 3 minutes until the end of the school day as had been a regular occurrence throughout the time that Rachel had been sleeping Eddie's eyes flickered towards her; pleased that she was sleeping as it was giving her body some hard earned rest. _I just wish that I had noticed it as I would have been able to help her before it got this bad. I can't help but blame myself as if anything had happened to her I would never be able to forgive myself, I'm suppose to love her but I didn't notice that she was struggling. _

Just looking above Rachel's head he gazed out the window and saw a familiar car pull into the car park; _this must be for the meeting that he is suppose to have with Rachel, but what can we do if she isn't awake, because I'm not waking her up therefore he will have to come back another day. I know it won't please him but Rachel is too special to have her health at risk._

However Eddie didn't need to worry as the bell sounded which caused Rachel to stir on the sofa, _she really is beautiful I just wish that I was able to call her mine._ The pupils who had rushed out of the school looked at Ralph Mellor and viewed him with distain with a large majority of the school tutting and shaking their heads at him. Paul looked at Bolton, "is that the person who was trying to get Miss Mason to leave earlier this school year?" he asked as he wanted confirmation until he acted on his hatred for the man in front of the two boys.

"Yeh, I think so, let's tell him what we think of him" Bolton replied as they were both perfectly aware that he had come to the school in response to the shooting of Maxine before the school holidays. _If he thinks that he is getting rid of Mason, he will have to get through Paul and me first. As I don't want Mason to go because of all the help and support that she has given me, let's call it, me returning the favour._

The pair of them had reached the car and Davina was waiting for Tom to get back into the car after placing the picnic basket in the boot. While Davina was waiting for him, she reflected upon recent events partly because she still couldn't believe how lucky she was to be marrying Tom. _I know that now I have him, I'm never going to let him go._

She was broken from her thoughts by the sound of the boot slamming and the driver door opening shortly after. Tom sat in the driver's seat rubbing his hands together trying to regain some of the warmth that had been lost ever since he had released Davina's hand to enable him to place the picnic basket in the boot. _I wish they would hurry up and text me because I don't know how much longer I'm able to delay going home as at the moment Davina isn't suspicious but she soon will be._

Davina saw Tom rubbing his hands together trying to generate some heat; and judging by the blue colour of them, they would require quite a bit of warming up. _I wonder if I would be able to help him._

Rachel was soon aware of the time and started to panic due to the way that she knew what the meeting was about and as she had fallen asleep she had taken time to prepare for the meeting. _I know I wanted to leave before but now I want to stay as I believe that I can make a difference to the people that come here and that's what teaching is all about isn't it?_

Davina leaned towards Tom and captured his lips with her own as the pair of them deepened the kiss, there was an urge from both of them to get home as it would have given them more room than the car was currently providing. Davina was running her hand through Tom's hair when Tom's phone vibrated in his pocket. Davina pulled away as it enabled him to read the message that had just been sent to him and she jokingly asked, "Who is it, the other woman?" Tom smiled back at her and despite knowing that it was asked as a joke Tom replied, "Why would I want another woman when I have the woman of my dreams in front of me". The pair of them smiled at one another and leant towards one another resulting in another kiss. This time it was Tom who backed away, "come on, let's go home" Tom said as he started the engine and reversed the car from the parking space.


	38. Chapter 38

Part 38

"Can we help you sir?" Bolton asked trying to stay as polite as he felt was physically possible considering who the man in front of him was. _Miss Mason always says the best way to avoid a confrontation is too take yourself out of a bad situation therefore I am keeping the situation calm but making sure that he knows that no-body wants him here._

"No I'm here to see Miss Mason" Ralph snared back as he remembered the two lads as being the ones that we always following him about telling each other how wonderful Miss Mason was last time that he was at the school. _I bet they think that they are really clever, I wonder what she has offered to the pair of them, after all a leopard can't change their spots can they?_

"Well I think she is busy at the moment" Paul replied to the man that neither of the lads respected and if it wasn't for Rachel asking neither of them to get into unnecessary fights they would have both happily punched Ralph until he didn't want to come back at the school. _But I don't think that Miss Mason would be very happy if we did that._

Tom pulled his phone out of his pocket and read the message, **All done, can come back now. Steph.** Tom reversed the car out of the car park and began the short journey home stealing a quick glance at his now sleeping fiancée. _I just hope that she likes the surprise as I want her to be happy as she makes me the happiness man alive when she agreed to marry me._

Eddie looked in Rachel's face and saw that she was getting increasingly worried, "Rachel calm down everything will be okay" he said trying to reassure her and give himself confidence that Rachel would actually want to stay; _but what Bridget said and Steph; although I now know that was false gave the impression that Rachel wanted to leave._

"How can you say that, Ralph Mellor is here and you know that he doesn't value my contribution to the school" Rachel replied with panic in her voice as this was one of the first times that she felt as though she wasn't in control and that was something that she hated.

"Well he is the only one then" Eddie responded with a reassuring smile on his face which caused Rachel to smile back at him as she felt that if Eddie was by her side then she would be able to face anything and anyone. _But that's the thing isn't it, he isn't by my side because I rejected him, I turned him down I lied and said that I didn't love him and now I don't know whether I will ever be able to take those words back again._

"Why what is she doing, actually I don't want to know as judging by her past, I can probably guess" Ralph replied knowing that this would anger both boys as it was obvious the respect that the pair of them had for her. _That will show them for thinking that they are able to question what my intentions are because no doubt that as soon as Rachel leaves the school; which if I get my way will be today, they will forget all about her as she is no-body important as should have left last year._

Ralph was right as this did annoy the pair of them that it caused Bolton to clench his fist and if it wasn't for all the work that Rachel did with him last year he would have probably punched Ralph by now. _I don't understand why they don't appreciate the fact that Miss Mason has changed as all they see is the negative things that she used to do._

Realising that Davina was asleep he decided that this was the perfect opportunity to drive the long route to their house as he wanted to increase the surprise therefore it would have been more effective if they were slightly later. _I hope she likes two surprises in the day because if she is sleeping now she may not be interested in another surprise but there's not a lot I can do now as it has already been decided that we will have the surprise._

Ralph walked past the two boys who had dubbed themselves 'the Mason protectors' "So Bolton what do you think he wants" Paul asked as they walked towards the gates knowing that there wasn't a lot more they could do for Rachel. _I just hope that Mr. Lawson is there to protect her. _

Ralph strode up to Rachel's office and pushed open the door without knocking, he saw Eddie in the office and immediately he felt angered that she would have him on his side; _she thinks he is but when it becomes obvious that if Rachel left he would get the job it will be interesting to see where his loyalties lie._


	39. Chapter 39

Part 39

"Hello Ralph" Rachel said trying to give the impression that she actually respected the man in front of her. _I don't know why I bother to be nice because it is blatantly obvious that the pair of us do not get on therefore I don't know why I'm even bothering to pretend that I do. _

Ralph wasn't interested in being polite towards Rachel therefore he replied, "I think you know why I'm here". Eddie who had been silent throughout the conversation so far looked straight at Ralph and saw the hatred that he felt for Rachel showing clearly on Ralph's face. _If he thinks that he is getting rid of Rachel then he will have another thing coming because the only way that Rachel will leave the school is if she chooses to._

"Shall we sit down then?" Rachel asked gesturing to the table and smiled appreciatively at Eddie as he had made any intention of leaving Rachel to face Ralph alone. _Well even if we're not together, I'm still pleased that he wants to support me as I certainly think I need help against Ralph because this isn't going to be a pleasant conversation._

Davina's eyes started to flicker open and as her eyes gradually started to adjust to the light, she looked confused; _why are we going to long way home I know we are cold but I thought that would be reason to get home quicker not slower._ "Tom why have we come this way back" Davina asked as she was now hungry and not in the mood for a long drive.

Tom contemplated whether he could act daft and claim that he had come the normal way home but he knew that Davina would have soon seen through this therefore he replied "there was a lot of traffic so I hoped that this route would be eventually quicker". This seemed to reassure Davina who let the tiredness overcome her again as she drifted into another peaceful sleep dreaming of the future that she and Tom had to look forward to.

"So I think you know what I want to talk about" Ralph started as although he had no respect for the woman in front of him, he also knew that Eddie and Rachel made a formidable team which would have been hard to break unless they were separated. _I hope I can do that as I never wanted Rachel at the school in the first place._

The meeting was dragging on and Ralph still hadn't got to the main point of the meeting as he had explained all the other possibilities which both Rachel and Eddie realised resulted in Rachel leaving but neither of them wanted to acknowledge this due to the pain that it caused for the pair of them; _how am I suppose to live without Eddie as he is my life and I love him. _The only important issue they had actually managed to discuss was what they would do with the Kelly's when they returned tomorrow. _But I had already decided that therefore it didn't really require a contribution from Ralph._

"However there is one other option that as a school we look favourable on" Ralph started and Rachel who had been absentmindedly looking out of the window now stared at Ralph in the eyes. _If he wants to tell me I can but that doesn't mean that I'm going to make it easy for him as I don't want to go and honestly I don't think that I ever did._ On hearing his recent phrase, this instantly got Eddie's attention as he knew that this conversation would not only have a massive impact on his life but also the schools.

Steph walked towards Matt's classroom pleased that at the moment there hadn't been a few stories about her little adventure down the corridor earlier in the school day. She knocked on the door and Matt grinned when he saw his best friend at the entrance to his classroom.

"Hi Matt, are you still okay for tonight?" Steph asked as she knew that if it was still going to work then she would require some help from her best friend and ally.

"Yes but how are you because Maxine was back today wasn't she?" Matt asked as he was aware that his friend may have been bottling her emotions up.

"Well she was nervous at first as she was scared about what people would think about her but I saw her at lunch and she said that everybody had been supportive and asked if she could go to Janeece's house this evening, so at least she is continuing her life as Earl hasn't taken her confidence.

"As the governors, we feel that you have offered all you can to the school and quite frankly there isn't anything else for you to offer to the school anymore so we are proposing the idea of removing you as head teacher and offering the job to someone else" Ralph said and from the expression on his face he was clearly enjoying the prospect of sacking Rachel.

Rachel was shocked at the way that he seemed so pleased about what he was saying and despite expecting it that didn't reduce the impact that it brought when he finally said it, however Eddie was incensed at the way Rachel was getting all the blame for the decision. _Anyone would think that it was Rachel who shot Maxine so I'm not going to let Rachel shoulder all the blame as no-one is more sorry than Rachel._

"There's something you should know Ralph, if Rachel leaves so do I because there is no way that there is a better head teacher than Rachel because she is the best and I never want to be deputy for anyone else" Eddie said smiling at Rachel who was now reddening as she was embarrassed about the praise that Eddie was sending her way.

Ralph smiled at both Rachel and Eddie as he had expected his response from Eddie; _well we will see how much Eddie feels like that then._ "That's the thing you don't have to work for anyone else…" both Rachel and Eddie looked at each other. _Surely Eddie isn't being sacked as well because if he is I will take all the blame; I won't let him get sacked due to my mistake. _Ralph saw the confusion that was shown on both of Rachel's and Eddie's face. _Aww isn't that nice, Rachel is concerned for somebody else other than herself…must be the first time ever._ "You won't have to work for anyone else, Eddie, because the governors want to offer you the job".

The silence echoed around the room.


	40. Chapter 40

Part 39

"Hello Ralph" Rachel said trying to give the impression that she actually respected the man in front of her. _I don't know why I bother to be nice because it is blatantly obvious that the pair of us do not get on therefore I don't know why I'm even bothering to pretend that I do. _

Ralph wasn't interested in being polite towards Rachel therefore he replied, "I think you know why I'm here". Eddie who had been silent throughout the conversation so far looked straight at Ralph and saw the hatred that he felt for Rachel showing clearly on Ralph's face. _If he thinks that he is getting rid of Rachel then he will have another thing coming because the only way that Rachel will leave the school is if she chooses to._

"Shall we sit down then?" Rachel asked gesturing to the table and smiled appreciatively at Eddie as he had made any intention of leaving Rachel to face Ralph alone. _Well even if we're not together, I'm still pleased that he wants to support me as I certainly think I need help against Ralph because this isn't going to be a pleasant conversation._

Davina's eyes started to flicker open and as her eyes gradually started to adjust to the light, she looked confused; _why are we going to long way home I know we are cold but I thought that would be reason to get home quicker not slower._ "Tom why have we come this way back" Davina asked as she was now hungry and not in the mood for a long drive.

Tom contemplated whether he could act daft and claim that he had come the normal way home but he knew that Davina would have soon seen through this therefore he replied "there was a lot of traffic so I hoped that this route would be eventually quicker". This seemed to reassure Davina who let the tiredness overcome her again as she drifted into another peaceful sleep dreaming of the future that she and Tom had to look forward to.

"So I think you know what I want to talk about" Ralph started as although he had no respect for the woman in front of him, he also knew that Eddie and Rachel made a formidable team which would have been hard to break unless they were separated. _I hope I can do that as I never wanted Rachel at the school in the first place._

The meeting was dragging on and Ralph still hadn't got to the main point of the meeting as he had explained all the other possibilities which both Rachel and Eddie realised resulted in Rachel leaving but neither of them wanted to acknowledge this due to the pain that it caused for the pair of them; _how am I suppose to live without Eddie as he is my life and I love him. _The only important issue they had actually managed to discuss was what they would do with the Kelly's when they returned tomorrow. _But I had already decided that therefore it didn't really require a contribution from Ralph._

"However there is one other option that as a school we look favourable on" Ralph started and Rachel who had been absentmindedly looking out of the window now stared at Ralph in the eyes. _If he wants to tell me I can but that doesn't mean that I'm going to make it easy for him as I don't want to go and honestly I don't think that I ever did._ On hearing his recent phrase, this instantly got Eddie's attention as he knew that this conversation would not only have a massive impact on his life but also the schools.

Steph walked towards Matt's classroom pleased that at the moment there hadn't been a few stories about her little adventure down the corridor earlier in the school day. She knocked on the door and Matt grinned when he saw his best friend at the entrance to his classroom.

"Hi Matt, are you still okay for tonight?" Steph asked as she knew that if it was still going to work then she would require some help from her best friend and ally.

"Yes but how are you because Maxine was back today wasn't she?" Matt asked as he was aware that his friend may have been bottling her emotions up.

"Well she was nervous at first as she was scared about what people would think about her but I saw her at lunch and she said that everybody had been supportive and asked if she could go to Janeece's house this evening, so at least she is continuing her life as Earl hasn't taken her confidence.

"As the governors, we feel that you have offered all you can to the school and quite frankly there isn't anything else for you to offer to the school anymore so we are proposing the idea of removing you as head teacher and offering the job to someone else" Ralph said and from the expression on his face he was clearly enjoying the prospect of sacking Rachel.

Rachel was shocked at the way that he seemed so pleased about what he was saying and despite expecting it that didn't reduce the impact that it brought when he finally said it, however Eddie was incensed at the way Rachel was getting all the blame for the decision. _Anyone would think that it was Rachel who shot Maxine so I'm not going to let Rachel shoulder all the blame as no-one is more sorry than Rachel._

"There's something you should know Ralph, if Rachel leaves so do I because there is no way that there is a better head teacher than Rachel because she is the best and I never want to be deputy for anyone else" Eddie said smiling at Rachel who was now reddening as she was embarrassed about the praise that Eddie was sending her way.

Ralph smiled at both Rachel and Eddie as he had expected his response from Eddie; _well we will see how much Eddie feels like that then._ "That's the thing you don't have to work for anyone else…" both Rachel and Eddie looked at each other. _Surely Eddie isn't being sacked as well because if he is I will take all the blame; I won't let him get sacked due to my mistake. _Ralph saw the confusion that was shown on both of Rachel's and Eddie's face. _Aww isn't that nice, Rachel is concerned for somebody else other than herself…must be the first time ever._ "You won't have to work for anyone else, Eddie, because the governors want to offer you the job".

The silence echoed around the room.


	41. Chapter 41

Part 40

The silence in the room was only the quiet before the storm and needless to say Eddie was the storm. Eddie looked at the two people in the room with him. _Wow they want to offer me the job as head teacher… but its Rachel's job and always will be. _Eddie looked directly at Rachel and saw that she had dipped her head as she was now avoiding Eddie's gaze. Eddie saw the pain that was etched onto her face and immediately felt angry due to the way that Ralph could have caused Rachel to be so upset. _What gives him the right to upset Rachel like this._

The school was deserted apart from the three people in the one room as this was the only room in the school which had the light left on was the majority of the rest of the staff had left for home after a hard first day back; all secretly hoping and counting down the days until they were able to have another holiday. It wasn't that they didn't like the school but whenever they were on holiday they were with the people that the loved and meant the most too, however when they returned to the school they had to maintain the professional front which was expected of them.

The only person who secretly liked the school was Grantly as Fleur had refused to let him do his first love; gambling on the horses, due to the debt that he got into last year when it spiralled out of control. _So I can honestly say that I love the school as it gives me the opportunity to do my first love, but that is all I love about the school._

The darkness that the rest of the school was covered in seemed to compound the silence which they felt in the one room where there was darkness in the room instead of the literally darkness which was cast in all the other rooms, there was a metaphoric darkness due to the bad mood which all the people in the room felt.

Eddie knew that he had to say something as the two other people in the room were waiting for a response from him.

"I don't want the job!" Eddie said in an angry tone as he couldn't believe that he was being asked to replace Rachel.

Rachel who was half expecting Eddie to take the job looked down at the table as the tears were starting to glisten in Rachel's eyes as the realisation that the decision being made were out of her control. _I hope Eddie reconsiders and takes the job because if not it will be offered to somebody else and he definitely deserves it as he would be a great head and I know that he would continue to move the school forwards whereas somebody else may destroy all mine and Eddie's hard work from over the last couples of years. _

Davina woke up as the car came to a stand-still as it pulled up outside their house. "Come on sleepy-head let's get you inside" Tom said as he looked at the house to see that it was all quiet. _Well she definitely isn't going to be any the wiser to the surprise that we have planned for her._

The pair of them walked into the house and Davina looked puzzled at Tom; _he is very confusing today, I wonder what the matter with him is as he has acted very strangely throughout today. _The pair of them walked into the lounge and the sound of their fellow colleagues and friends shouting, "Surprise, happy engagement" greeted both of their ears.

Davina looked around the room and then looked accusingly at Tom, "you knew about this didn't you?" which caused Tom to laugh and reply, "Naturally, I never miss a thing".

The other people in the room laughed and then this turned into "awws" with the sight of the two people who were in very much in love, showing some public affection as they shared a kiss which represented the love they felt for one another.

Ralph looked annoyed at Eddie; _I can't believe that Eddie doesn't want the job; I hope this isn't out of some form of misguided loyalty towards Rachel, because I could tell him now that she isn't worth it._


	42. Chapter 42

Part 41

The rest of the staff had offered their congratulations and left Tom and Davina in peace while they made their way to the free alcohol. "I hope you realise Steph that this is the only reason that I came because I give it 6 weeks and then one of them will be having an affair as marriage doesn't mean as much as it used to". Grantly grumbled as he had been removed from his racing paper when he felt that he had only just been reunited with it. _I want to know how the other people would feel if they had to spend 6 weeks not doing something which they really enjoy…no I'm not talking about teaching the little terrors which life-long ambition will be to mug some old dear in the street._

"So how did you know about it then?" Davina asked as she was now starting to really the hushed voices whenever she walked into a room and the reason for their little excursion onto the hills. _And I thought that he was being romantic!_

"Well… I heard people talking about an engagement party and I wondered whether it was Rachel's and Eddie's…" Tom was going to continue talking but Davina interrupted him, "Are they getting married then?" Davina asked excitedly as she stood to make a tidy profit if they were due to the sweep stake that she had entered herself in; _although I have to pretend that I hadn't as me and Tom both considered that it was too harsh to bet on people's lives but I couldn't resist because I'm so obviously going to win with Rachel and Eddie as anyone can see they love one another; well apart from themselves that it._

"No I don't think so, why" Tom asked hoping that he would be able to explain that he joined the sweep stake although he knew that Davina wouldn't be very impressed with him. _But I couldn't help it as I will put the money towards the honeymoon._

"No reason" Davina replied which dropped both of their hopes as they hated keeping secrets from one another.

"You do know you will be passing up on your best chance to run this place" Ralph replied with a malicious tone with an expression which signalled that this would not be offered again. Rachel continued to keep her head looking at the table as she didn't want Ralph to see tears which were glistening in her eyes. _I must be stronger as I need to make plans what I can do when I leave this job as it is clear that I'm not going to be staying for much longer I just hope that Eddie takes the job as then I know that it is in safe hands because the pupils deserve it. _

"Well I realised something was happening when Chlo came to me to ask for house keys and when I asked why she explained that Steph had asked for them. So of course I went to find out more and she eventually after some persuasion told me what was planned. The only reason I agreed to it was because if they all have a drink on our behalf now it might mean that some of them are sober enough to actually remember the wedding". Tom sadi and Davina wrapped her arms around Tom's neck and replied, "I don't care if they don't remember it because I will as I'm the luckiest woman in the world as I love you".

Eddie looked at Rachel and smiled; _how could Ralph even believe that I would contemplate taking the job from Rachel._ Eddie looked at back at Ralph and said, "This is Rachel's job and always will be until she decides otherwise, so I'm not gong to help you kick her while se is down".

Although Rachel was giving the impression that she wasn't actually listening to the conversation she had a good impression as to what was happening between the two men partly due to the way that it was becoming louder and louder in volume; _well by Ralph anyway, obviously he thinks the louder that you talk to Eddie the more he responds, well he's wrong its louder and slowly to Eddie as this is the only way that he ever understands what I'm saying._ _How can I be making jokes when my career is on the line here as I doubt any other school would have me as I would have to tell them all about my past; which wouldn't be easy._

Steph tapped her glass which got everyone attention, "Hi everyone" Steph started as although she was a naturally loud person she hated doing speeches and the only reason she was doing it was because she knew that as it was free alcohol people would go over the top with it and be in no fit state to talk. _Of course I don't mean myself….do I?_

"I just wanted to say we will do the presents when Rachel and Eddie finally arrive from the unusually long meeting…although of course I'm not implying anything" she laughed as the whole of the staff turned to look at Grantly hoping this would be the evening where he would have to pay up.

Once the laughter had quietened down Steph continuing talking "But I just wanted to say we wish you all the best, Tom and Davina" Steph said raising her glass to the pair of them which caused the other staff in the room to mirror the action.

"Well you do realise that although you are accepting the job doesn't mean that it won't be offered to anyone else don't you because as governors we don't want Rachel at the school any more" Ralph was actually talking to Eddie but throughout the whole of that speech he was looking at Rachel as he was enjoying the way that he was effectively sacking her; something which he had wanted to do for a long time.


	43. Chapter 43

Part 42

"Well Steph, were our illustrious leader and the person who you all falsely believe has some feelings for her". Grantly asked as he was quite annoyed that this was compulsory for him to come to; as it was bingo night tonight therefore Fleur would have been out. _I normally look forwards to Monday nights as it means I have longer with my paper whereas today I am being subjected to having to stay with people who I got thoroughly bored of, throughout the school day as if spending 6 hours in their company isn't enough._

"Well I don't know Grantly but they are together so prepare to pay up as it seems as though you owe a lot of people money" Steph replied with a smirk on her face as she was getting annoyed at Grantly as he seemed intent on ruining other people's happiness with his bad moods or his comments. _At least it seems as though that has meant he has no reply as it is taking Grantly longer than normal to respond._

However Steph was wrong as Grantly replied, "I have told you before that I'm not paying up until there is actual proof and I see it with my own eyes and I'll tell you this now if…no, when they get divorced after 1 year I will want a full refund". This comment caused Steph to look at him confused, "why would they get a divorce after one year?" This caused Grantly to smirk and replied "because he will find out that she has not given up her previous profession, after all a leopard can't change its spots".

This is remark; Steph gave Grantly a withering look and left him standing alone in the corner as she didn't want to stand next to someone who was confident of ruining everything good about other people's lives.

Rachel had taken a couple of deep breathes therefore she had regained her composure; _Eddie is doing all the fighting for me here perhaps I had better also help._

"Ahh the vote of no confidence" Rachel replied which caused the two men in the room with her to took at her surprised; Ralph was surprised that she was fighting back, _Why can't she do what everybody wants and leave without making a fuss she is making this a lot harder than it needs to be but then I suppose she is used to being paid after she has done a job therefore perhaps I had better throw she cash her way. I bet that will make her leave._

Eddie because he had half expected her to leave the school but now it seemed as though Rachel actually wanted to stay. _So I'm going to do everything within my power to ensure that that happens._

_B_efore Ralph was even able to respond to Rachel's statement Eddie had asked him a question, "yeah why don't the governors trust Rachel any more because I know the rest of the school does".

Ralph stared at Eddie; _I don't understand why he is putting up such a fight for her because if he left the job would be his. Perhaps he doesn't want the job then. _"The governors don't want Rachel at the school because she is a liability as for the two 'delightful' years that she has been with us she has caused more scandal and bad press than the rest of the head teachers put together. Ralph had decided that the only way to get rid of Rachel was to make her feel so stupid and small she would want to resign herself; _perhaps this will get the desired effect._

Eddie looked bewildered at Ralph, _how can he claim that? _When Eddie was looking at Rachel's hurt and alone face, Eddie had an idea…_I wonder if it will work._ Eddie glanced around the room first looking at Ralph who was directly opposite him; _well he doesn't seem to be paying much attention obviously trying to think of another comment to make Rachel look stupid. _He then glanced at Rachel who was sitting to the right of him and he saw the expression on her face which he hadn't seen for a long time; determination. _well at least she is going to fight the decision, I wonder if she will appreciate what I'm going it do but then at least it will give the impression that we are in it together._


	44. Chapter 44

Part 43

Eddie removed his right hand off the table and placed it on his own leg trying as best to make movements which were as unnoticeable as ever. As once more the silence captured the room Eddie started to respond to Ralph recent comment. "Rachel is the only one that has been associated with bad press what about Izzie getting stabbed and jack's use of finances". Eddie continued with his plan. He glanced at Rachel and spotted where her left hand was; _ok it's now or never then._ He lifted his hand from his own leg and took hold of Rachel's left hand.

Steph shoved her phone back into her handbag hoping that the recent text would get some reply from Maxine. _I only want to know that she is okay as I know that Ralph is trying to get Earl out of prison and I would hate it if he managed it as I would be unable to keep Maxine safe and the only way to ensure her safety would be to move countries and although I don't want to do this I would do it because Maxine means more to me than anything or anyone else. _

As soon as she felt the contact with his hand, Rachel looked surprised as the electricity passed through both of their bodies and the feelings that she had harboured for quite some time were starting to come to the surface. She had tried to reduce the reaction; which was almost bringing a smile to her face as the man opposite them, now hating the pair of them. _I can honestly say that I like the feel of his hand in mine as it seems to fit as though that's how it is meant to be. But he is only doing it out of support he probably doesn't mean anything by it._ They sat like this for a couple of minutes listening to Ralph making every excuse under the sun as to why Rachel was the worst headteacher that Waterloo Road had ever had, when the feeling that just holding Eddie's hand wasn't enough. The feelings in the pit of her stomach had finally reached the surface and she had no urge to oppose them.

A couple of minutes had passed and still Steph hadn't received a text from Maxine therefore she was starting to get worried. _What if something has happened I know that Max said I should come, but I will never forgive myself if she has come to any harm._

Matt who had been enduring Grantly's moaning for the last couple of minutes saw the worried expression on his best friend's face and decided that this was the perfect way to escape the ramblings of Grantly. By now Steph was starting to look worried and she was unaware that Matt had approached her, "hi Steph" Matt said which failed to get any response from Steph therefore Matt tried again, "Hi Steph is everything okay"

Not wanting to get anyone else involved, Steph answered "yes everything is fine, why wouldn't it be?" _ok not exactly the truth but the less people that know means that there is less people in danger as Max is at risk I don't know what I would do if I caused Matt to be put in risk as he is my best friend._

However Matt wasn't convinced, "come on Steph, whatever it is you should know that you can tell me, as I know that I have come to you with my problems enough it is only fair that I return the favour.

Rachel started to entwine her fingers with his and initially Eddie believed that she was pulling her hand away from his; _well it was only an idea I suppose_ therefore Eddie released her hand making it easier for her to remove her hand from his, it was then Eddie who was puzzled as rather than her removing her hand she wrapped her fingers around his and smiled at him as for now this was enough for her. _What is Rachel trying to do to me, one minutes it's off then she is doing this perhaps she does feel something for me and I'm just going to have to wait for her to be ready until she will commit fully to relationship with me. But I will wait for as long as it takes. I know one thing for certain, with this renewed hope there is no way that I'm letting Rachel leave._


	45. Chapter 45

Part 45

Rachel and Eddie exchanged expression as they stood up from the table as they watched Ralph walk out the room; not noticing that the pair of them were still connecting at the hand as Rachel ran her right hand through her hair unable to believe the events which had happened in the room. _I can't believe that Eddie would be prepared to give up his job for me because I'm not worth it as he has to look after himself._

With Ralph stood outside Rachel's office door, she saw this as her opportunity to stop Eddie making a big mistake. _I know they are going to eventually get rid of me, I just don't want Eddie to be dragged down as well due to supporting me so I had better try everything I can to stop him and persuade him to take the job because I know that he will look after the interests of the school._

Tom and Davina were standing in the back garden which hadn't been forgotten about in the staff's decoration as there were white fairy lights in trees which made the environment feel colder but the pair of them were both kept warm due to the embrace which they were held in.

"Have I ever told you that I love you" Tom asked to the woman that was standing in his arms. _I'm going to tell her everyday how I feel about her because after Izzie died I thought that I would spend my life alone but then Davina came and she picked me up from rock-bottom and although it sounds like a cliché she made my life worth living._

"I think you may have implied it" Davina replied with a smile on her face knowing that she was marrying a man who had the same strength of feelings for her as she did for him.

"Well in that case I had better tell you because implying it isn't enough" Tom responded and then continued by saying "Davina I love you and I can't wait to marry you"

"I'm sorry Eddie but I'm not going to let you do this as it isn't fair to you". Rachel stated as she held onto Eddie's hand enjoying the comfort that it provide. _I just with that I had a right to request this support from Eddie but instead I don't as I reject Eddie when we required each other the most and that is something that I have to live with and deal with. As it is something that will never change; even if I wanted it too._

Eddie looked back at Rachel astonished; _how can she be caring about somebody else when her career is on the line here. That is one of the many reasons as to why I love Rachel and I'm never letting her go even if she tries to pretend that she wants me to. _"It's not fair on me, how about trying 'it's not fair on you Rachel' as Ralph is trying to get rid of you when you did your job and tried to see the best in every pupil" Eddie replied as he used his thumb to stroke the back of Rachel's hand. A simple action that made her breath hitched in the back of her throat.

Tom and Davina lent forwards and captured each other lips with their own and this kiss spoke more words than either of them knew as it spoke about their desire for one another and the love which they held in their heart. "Do you think that we had better rejoin the party?" Davina asked as if she had her way she would have spent the whole evening outside with Tom; resting her head on his chest listening to his heart beating. _It should be cold but I'm not it's almost as though I am too happy for any negative feelings to get anywhere near me and that is down to Tom._

"Well we could but I don't want as I prefer being with you rather than any of them in there" Tom replied and Davina laughed, "I don't know surely the appeal of Grantly makes you want to return, as I know it is taking all of my self-control not to run in there to him".

"Don't you think that it would be better for me to leave?" Rachel asked although she was convinced that she knew the answer which Eddie would provide."

"No I don't" Eddie replied as he couldn't believe that Rachel had asked him such a question; _hasn't she listened to a word that I have said but then I guess Ralph has messed with her head a fair bit therefore I have to sort it out for her._

Rachel looked confused at the reasoning that Eddie was going to give as to why she should stay, "but I hadn't exactly done what I set out to do have I?"

Tom pretended to be annoyed at her as he released her from his embrace and said, "Well I have made it easier for you" Tom said turning away from her which made her question whether he was actually joking or now being serious.

Davina rushed up behind him and out her hands on his shoulders; "Tom I was only joking" she called to him hoping that this would give the desired effect however she was confused as he didn't turn around; _perhaps I have I hurt him more than I thought. _It was only when she walked around to face him did she realise that he was smiling. "See I knew you were unable to resist me" Tom said with a smirk.

Before Eddie was able to respond, Ralph had entered the room so the pair of them instinctively dropped one another's hand but they both craved the comfort which it had provide.

"The governors have come to a decision" Ralph said as he walked back into the room; leaving both Rachel and Eddie to exchange nervous glances as they once more in the meeting were sat around the table listening to the potential damage which Ralph would inflict on Rachel's career.


	46. Chapter 46

Part 46

"I'm sorry Steph, I had no idea what was happening but if ever you need anywhere to stay; you or Maxine my door is always open and I am always available for you to talk to day or night" Matt replied as he was horrified that he hadn't noticed the struggle that his best friend had been going through in recent weeks. _I can't believe what Ralph Mellor is like, I just hope that he doesn't succeed because they should lock him up with Earl and throw away the key._

"So then Rachel, I expect you want to know the decision that has been made" Ralph stated as he was going to enjoy the news that he was able to deliver. _I knew the rest of the governors would come round to my way of thinking eventually and all I can think is that I have waited 2 years to be able to do this and I know that I will enjoy doing._

Rachel and Eddie sat on the opposite side of the table and once more prepared themselves for the revelations that Ralph would bring and the effect that it would have one the pair of their lives. For the second time in the short meeting; the pair of them held hands but unlike the first time it was Rachel who searched for Eddie's hand as she craved the comfort and security she always received from Eddie. _I don't know what I will do without Eddie but I had better get used to it as I'm sure that Ralph is going to get rid of me now. But I'm not going to let Ralph sack me because I will go before he decides to do it._

Tom and Davina were still standing in the garden; which now seemed incredibly colder due to the sudden drop in temperature; however Tom and Davina were kept warm due to the love that they felt for one another. The two of them believed that they were standing in the garden alone however the tranquil mood was interrupted by a rustling of a newspaper in the corner of the garden. Although neither of them were paying any attention to the person they both knew who it was; _I thought Grantly was told by Steph not to bring the newspaper although it looks as though he has completely ignored that 'advice'._

"Ralph why don't I make this easier for you" Rachel explained as she wanted to keep the small amount of pride which she had left as when she was working at the school a large amount of this pride had been lost due to the revelations of last year and the after effects of the fire.Eddie looked at Rachel confused, _what could she be saying because surely she isn't still intending to leave because she gave the impression that she was fighting back before but now it seems as though she has been resound to her fate but I'm still not going to let her go anywhere._

Ralph looked back at Rachel with malice in his eyes; _it seems as though my plan is working I knew that Plan B would because it seems as though this will be a lot better than the original plan as it will have more success. _"And how are you planning on doing that Rachel" Ralph asked as he had a pretty good idea of what Rachel was saying and to be truthful he was delighted about the prospect. _I'm actually a bit disappointed as I hoped that she would have put up a little bit more of a fight but then why would she when she is able to resort back to her previous profession, I just hope that she is better at that because she has always been dreadful at this one._

"Grantly!" Tom called as he saw this as the ideal opportunity to get back at Davina for her previous comment; Davina looked at him horrified; "what are you doing I was enjoying the fact that it was just the pair of us" she whispered to him as she was preparing herself for the interruption.

"Oh I know you were so this is pay back time" Tom replied with a smirk on his face as he saw Grantly try to disguise his newspaper once more and made his way towards the pair of them.

"I will get you back later" Davina retorted as she was feeling disappointed that she had to share Tom with somebody else.

"Oh I'm sure you will" Tom answered with a grin as they paused at their bantering as there was a third person within their proximity.

Eddie was attracted to Rachel's chocolate pools as he waited patiently to hear what she was going to say; _I just hope that it isn't too bad as I was being serious I don't want to work here without her. As she is the reason why I want to come to work in the morning and she is the reason why I don't want to leave in the evenings. I just wish that I hadn't wasted as much time when she was new with me refusing to have anything to do with her. Why do you only realise what you have when it is too late?_


	47. Chapter 47

Part 47

_I wonder whether it would be better for me to leave because the way that Ralph is saying it, ensures that I'm not wanted and he will only make my life harder for me. Although I don't want to admit it; I'm too tired to fight any longer so perhaps if I chose to leave it, would mean that when Eddie had get passed the initial shock he will accept the decision and take the job. That will be helpful for the pair of us because I will already find it hard to leave but I know that Waterloo Road will still have a good person at the helm and someone who will be able to take the school forwards and maintain the progress that we have put together. _

"Well it is blatantly obvious that I'm not wanted at the school any longer" Rachel was interrupted by Ralph mumbling, "you've got that right" which caused Eddie to send him daggered looks and the only reason he refrained from commenting was the fact that Rachel was about to begin talking again. _And I know that I have a bigger fight on my hand than Ralph Mellor as it appears that Rachel has given up the fight but I'm not prepared to._

Davina saw that Grantly was approaching her and Tom and in her panic to decide what she could pretend she wanted to say to him, she didn't notice that Tom had left to fend for herself. _What can I say because at this time I feel that I could kill Tom as I have no idea what I am able to say to him?_

"So then Miss Shackleton what can I do to help you?" Grantly asked although it was obvious to the pair of them that the use of 'Miss Shackleton' was sarcastic as he hadn't forgiven for the incident last year when Davina stuck up for Karla over him. _I can't imagine what she wants me for as it is a well known fact that the pair of us don't get on therefore there is absolutely no point in pretending otherwise and furthermore I'm not prepared too._

Davina cringed at Grantly's comment; _I wish that I had Tom to help me as this is not going to be comfortable. _"I just wondered whether you were having a good time." Davina asked and felt herself quake due to the knowledge that this would be met with a harsh comment and needless to say Grantly didn't disappoint.

"So I'm going to hand in my resignation and if possible I want it to be used with immediate effect; however I would prefer to be able to explain my decision to the pupils as I think they deserve an explanation" Rachel explained with the tears being to well up in her eyes and if she hadn't looked away to stop the tears from rolling down her cheeks she would have seen the look of glee on Ralph's face when he heard the latest revolution. _And to think that I thought today was going to be a bad day but instead I don't think that it could be any better because although on the phone the governors said that under no circumstances was I to dismiss Rachel but if Rachel is resigning then I can claim that although I tried to change her opinion I was unable to._

"Ooh, yes I'm having a great time, I mean I'm not allowed to read my paper and I'm having an enthralling time". Grantly replied with the comment dripping with sarcasm. _Of course I'm not having a good time because this is meant to be my paper time but instead I'm stuck here in a house where I feel the other thing decent thing is the free alcohol…how bad does that seem anyone would think that I'm Steph Haydock._

Eddie who had taken a couple of minutes to regain his composure was still angry at Rachel as he couldn't believe that after all his effort to try and convince Rachel to stay she was actual still planning on leaving. _I never thought that I would be giving up on her but it seems as though she has actually won although I don't want her to leave._

"The pupils aren't the only ones who deserve any explanation" Eddie with the bitterness that he felt towards her being directed towards her in his comment.


	48. Chapter 48

Part 48

Rachel shot Eddie a look of disgust as she couldn't understand why he was making it harder for her. _Why does he always have to be so stubborn… why can't he just accept my decision and leave me alone? Surely he knows that I don't really want to leave but I don't trust my judgement any more and I have made far too many mistakes._

Ralph looked between the two people in the room and his reaction to this news was very different to theirs; as they felt resentment about the fact that Rachel was begrudgingly deciding to leave whereas he was thrilled. _I knew today was going to be a good day. The only disappointing thing is that I'm not allowed to accept her resignation straight away as I will have to pretend that I have tried to make her change her mind…of course I will put a lot of effort into helping her pack her belongings!_

Davina was stuck while Grantly showed her the paper which he was managing to keep a secret from Steph but still fill his need for all the racing gossip. Davina noticed all the bets that he had placed; the enthusiasm which he spoke about it surprised Davina. _If only we did lessons about gambling because then Grantly would be an exceptional teacher. _

"Ok I will start to put the wheels in motion then, I would normally ask you to reconsider your decision but I think we would all agree that this is the right decision" Ralph started to try and sound genuine but the huge smile on his face told a completely different story.

Before he was able to continue speaking Eddie interrupted him, "I don't agree that this is the right decision because I know that it isn't and I think the governors would actually agree with me". His voice started to rise throughout the speech as he was trying to defend Rachel as he was never going to give up on her as he still secretly harboured hopes that he would be able to get a lot closer to Rachel. _But I guess that isn't realistic now._

Ralph rolled his eyes; _I can't believe that he is still trying to fight Rachel's corner as it is obvious that she doesn't want to stay perhaps he will have to get used to it as I'm determined that I'm not going to rest until Rachel Mason has left the school. _

Realising a way to try and escape Davina said, "I didn't think that you were suppose to bring the paper from Steph's strong instruction" Grantly snorted "surely you don't think that I take any notice from our Stephanie because we all know that she will get so drunk today she won't even remember the way home".

Rachel was contemplating having to leave the room as the barriers were being crushed with each statement that Eddie made in her defence. _It's not only the words that he is saying it is that way that he is saying them with a deep felt conviction…I never thought he felt that strongly about me. I suppose I did have an idea but that proves that I have to leave before we get too involved because I ruin everything and anyone who gets near to me. A prime example is Melissa as I was left to bring her up by myself and look at the type of person that she is…but what do you expect when I'm the role model. It's a good job that I never let myself find a man who loves me and have children with him, because think of the damage that I would do to the children's lives. _

"Eddie can you just accept my decision please because I'm not going to change my mind as it is best for everyone" Rachel pleaded with Eddie as she was finding it hard to say that she wanted to leave in the first place. _How can I want to leave when Waterloo Road is what my life is based around and as strange as it sounds I actually like that._

"Oh, it's best for the pupils is it?" Eddie asked however the comment was filled with the anger that he felt towards Rachel. _I don't want to be like this towards her but I can't believe that she is prepared to let Ralph win. She knows that I will always stand by her…just not with her decision to leave; that is something that I will never support…ever!_

"Eddie, why can't you just accept my judgement?" Rachel demanded as she knew that she couldn't provide Eddie with a proper answer as truthfully she didn't believe that she was doing the right thing. Ralph was sitting there smiling knowing that if the pair of them were arguing the formidable force that they always had was destroyed. _Looks like I win again…I knew I would._

Davina inwardly groaned when she heard that as she was aware that her way of escaping Grantly had fallen to pieces and it was only when she spotted Tom in the corner of her eye waving to her did she realise a perfect opportunity to escape, "sorry Grantly but I have to go as I think that Tom needs me". Davina ignored Grantly's exasperated face as she left him and hit Tom on the chest, "never do that, to me again" he wrapped his arms around her and kissed the top of her head.

"What is going to happen to the school?" Rachel asked as she knew that the only way leaving was going to be made easier would be if she knew that the school was in safe hands. Eddie resisted the urge to ask her why it affected her and listened to the response that Ralph was going to provide, "well obviously we will try and replace you as quickly as possible to prevent any further upheavals therefore ideally we would prefer an internal candidate" Ralph said which resulted in both Rachel and Ralph looking at Eddie. The anger started to rise further in Eddie and before he was able to stop himself he launched a blazing attack on the pair of them, "so you think that just because Rachel is resigning I will want the job, well I don't"

Rachel interrupted Eddie, "but Waterloo Road pupils need someone who understands them" she tried her best to explain to him the school's necessity for him to stay. _If I know Eddie is in charge I will be able to leave because I trust him._

"Why don't you stay then" Eddie shot back at her as he released Rachel's hand and stormed out of her office.


	49. Chapter 49

_Part 49_

"Well they are taking a long time aren't they?" Matt asked Steph who was about to confront Grantly about the newspaper which she had spotted when she was in the kitchen. _Fancy bringing a paper, when I specifically told him not too. I bet he thinks he is clever, well we will see about that when I confiscate it won't we. The problem is that is something that I would do with the kids never mind Grantly._

"Who do you mean" Steph asked as she wasn't quite understanding where Matt was going with his comments as he seemed to remember things which other people simply considered insignificant and forgot about.

Matt looked back at Steph amazed, "who do you think that I'm talking about? The blank expression on Steph's face made Matt look horrified and took great pleasure in revealing his theory to Steph hoping that this would lead to some gossip between the pair of them "Rachel and Eddie!" _After all gossiping is what we are best at._

"Oh I hadn't noticed" Steph responded as she looked deep in thought as she began to approach Grantly who was currently trying to pretend that he was reading the menu for the local take-away rather than his newspaper.

"Steph, what's the matter you are starting to worry me now?" Matt asked as he was concerned about the blonde haired charismatic woman. _I know the problems that she has but it seems as though something has happened and I wish that she would tell me because I'm worried about her…I want to be there for her and ensure that everything is ok as I want her to be happy due to the number of times which she has stood by me and helped me; particularly through all the tough times._

Rachel looked back at Ralph apologetically; "I'm sorry about him I think he found it slightly hard to accept but don't worry I will try and convince him to take the job" Rachel explained trying to defend Eddie as she was concerned about his job due to his reaction to the news. _I wish that Eddie wouldn't try to defend me because even if I wanted to stay I can't therefore the quicker he accepts that the better._

Rachel was broken from her thoughts with the sounds of Ralph's chair shuffling across the carpet on the floor, "Well Rachel I think we could conclude that this meeting is over; I will forward your views to the rest of the governors and I will be in contact shortly with their response. It would be normal practise for them to shake hands but the pair of them didn't have any respect for the other therefore it resulted in Ralph just marching out of the office with a smirk on his face. _Well I'm quite disappointed I thought that she would try harder than that to stay because I was already devising Plan C but it looks as though I will never need it. I just hope that I can explain to the governors before Rachel does as that would scupper the plans if she found out the truth. But then she isn't going to if I have anything to do with it; unless I tell her when it is too late just to rub salt into the wound._

"Why me not interested in gossiping, worries you does it?" Steph asked sarcastically as she wanted to be left alone as she was getting extremely worried about Maxine as she still hadn't text her and in Steph's opinion it was Rachel; and Eddie who were delaying it therefore if anything happened to Maxine they would have been partly responsible. _If they don't hurry up I will have to leave the party as I need to check that she is safe because only then will I be able to relax._

"Well yes actually it does" Matt replied with a smile and the endearing smile which he had soon resulted in it being transferred onto his friends face, "Sorry Matt, I just worried about Maxine as she still hasn't text back and I don't want to even contemplate the possible danger which she may be in" Steph replied with a sign of tears starting to well in her eyes. _I'm a bit of an emotional wreck today aren't I?_

Matt asked a question to him which seemed to be fairly logical, "why don't you continue it phone and text her until you do get a response" Steph almost laughed as soon as she heard it, "can tell that you don't have children due to that question as if you do that they are more likely to ignore you rather than answer" Matt smiled as he remember moaning about his mother doing it to him when he was younger, _but here I was suggesting it, it just shows that you do actually behave like your parents._

"Yeah I suppose you're right because I remember ignoring my parents when they pestered me on a night out with my friends" Matt stated and smiled with the memories which were brought to the forefront of his memory.

"Well your mother is protective as she is…remember when she came to the school last year" Steph responded with a smirk as she knew the embarrassment that Matt felt for the occasion.

"Please Steph don't remind me" Matt replied ducking his head hoping that she would drop the subject.


	50. Chapter 50

Part 50

Rachel tidied her office and then prepared to leave the school contemplating whether she should go to the party; which was organised for Tom and Davina. _I have the present though so I haven't got much of a choice, but I won't stay for very long. I will just check whether Eddie has left the school as there are things to resolve with him, I just wish that he would accept my decision._

Walking through the now darkened corridors caused Rachel to shiver; it wasn't because it was particularly cold but it was due to the dark atmosphere which had engulfed the school ever since the pupils had left at 3:30. _The problem is, the function of the school is to educate and without the pupils, the school has no life. Sometimes I prefer the quiet as it enables me to think but now I feel cold and alone…ok possibly slightly afraid; but I will never admit that to anyone as the one person who had dismantled my barriers is the one person who is going to aid in their construction. His performance in the office proved that._

Subconsciously Rachel looked out of the window; which overlooked the staff car-park but something caught her attention. Her car was the only one remaining in the car park as there was a car which Rachel presumed to be Ralph's being driven out of the car park. _Looks like it's just me then, typical, that's the story of my life._

"Come on Tom, as much as I like being here with you, I think we should go back inside because the sooner we mingle with the guest the quicker they will go" Davina said with a smile on her face as although she was enjoying the company of the people around her she still wanted to be lying on the sofa with Tom's strong arms around her. _That is my idea of a good time._

Begrudgingly Rachel walked to her car and wrapped her arms around her body trying to contain the warmth and ease the pain that she was feeling ever since Eddie had left her side in the office. After locating her keys in her bag she withdrew them and eventually sat in the driver's seat enjoying the comfort and support that it offered her. _I know someone else who used to do that but I think I have put pay to that now._

Rachel put the keys into the ignition; _better pretend that I'm in a mood for a celebration but it shouldn't be too hard as I pretend about my entire life. I can't even be truthful with myself, never mind anyone else. _

Steph's phone buzzed and immediately she searched for it in her handbag_. I hope that it is Max as I need to know that she is safe_. _I hate to think what may have happened to her._ However Steph didn't need to have to worry as when she was looking on the display, she was instantly relieved; _at least she is in contact with me. I just hope that it says something positive._** Hi Steph, soz 4 the delay in txt. Just been with Jan. Hope the party's good. Max xxx**

Steph smiled as she read the text again just to ensure that there was nothing hidden in the message as a type of code. When she was trying to decipher it she must have looked strange because Matt asked, "Steph is everything ok" the panic was obvious in his voiceso it caused Steph to turn and show him the smile which was captured on her face.

"Yep, everything's great. And you're right the pair of them are taking a long time" She replied which caused Matt to smile at her knowing that he had got his friend back.

Tom and Davina walked back inside, hand-in-hand, "have I told you how much I love you?" Tom asked Davina which caused her to smile due to the warmth of his breath hitting the coldness of her ear; a result of the sub-zero temperature which they had been standing in for the last 10 minutes.

"I think you may have mentioned it once or twice" Davina responded with a smirk which caused Tom to lean forwards and capture her lips with his own. Slowly pulling away Tom whispered, "I love you and I can't wait to marry you".

Davina nodded in agreement, "neither can I". The pair of them pulled away with from another kiss with the sound of the door bell. Tom groaned as this was another guest which they would have to greet, "don't worry the quicker they come, the sooner they will go and leave us in peace, which reminds me, you still need to be punished".

Jasmine opened the door and saw that Eddie was standing on the door step looking annoyed, "is everything ok Eddie?" she asked as she had always remembered the way that he stuck up for her against Michaela White.

"Fine" Eddie replied in such a tone that told Jasmine he wasn't really in the celebratory mood.

She moved out of the way and let Eddie proceed through the door; _and I thought it was Grantly who seemed to be determined to spoil today. Why isn't anyone happy?_

"Ooh Eddie has arrived although he is without Rachel; do you think that is to try and make it less suspicious?" Matt asked as he was getting excited about the potential 'information' which they believed they had.

"I don't know Matt let's ask him shall we?" Steph suggested and initially Matt thought she was joking, "Yeah might as well" he replied with a smile; half expecting to see Steph trying to get out of it. What he didn't expect was Steph to start staggering as she heading in Eddie's direction" Steph what are you doing" Matt whispered, which caused Steph to smile, "finding out what is happening between Eddie and Rachel of course". _I will report my finding back to TTG; or shall I change that to The Two Gossips (instead of three) as Grantly isn't as dedicated as the job requires him to be. Actually that is still TTG…maybe I have had more wine than I thought._


	51. Chapter 51

Part 51

"Hi Eddie, you're late" Steph started slowly trying to get around to the issue that he and Matt were most definitely interested in. _ok it is most probably because we stand to make a fair bit of money but it is also because I would quite like Rachel and Eddie to be happy as the pair of them have gone through a lot and have stayed together._

"Well me and Rachel…" Eddie noticed the excited expressions that were passed between Matt and Steph. _They are so childish although I want something to happen between me and Rachel, it's not going to happen because she is leaving as although I thought I had convinced her to stay I obviously didn't try hard enough._ "have been in a meeting" Eddie finished his statement ignoring the two people in front of him hoping that they would eventually get the hint that they weren't wanted and leave him in peace. However this wasn't either Matt's or Steph's intentions, "so was it just you two in the meeting then?" Steph tried to be as subtle as possible when she asked but in reality she failed miserably as Eddie could see how their minds worked. _I wish. _"No it was a meeting between us and Ralph; who was representing the governors".

Matt sniggered behind Steph, and mumbled into her ear, "I bet that upset the pair of their plans, as we can only imagine what happens in all the extended meetings that take place". However rather than smiling or even taking interest in the recent information that they had extracted, Steph looked confused. _Why would the governors what to talk to the pair of them I wonder if something has happened, and if there is anything that I can do to sort it out. _

Rachel sat outside the house in her car contemplating whether her decision was the correct one for the school even if it wasn't the correct decision for her. _I don't need to consider whether it is the right decision for me because I know that it isn't, but what can I do, because I always promised myself when I joined Waterloo Road, that I would do everything in the interests of the school and on many accounts this is the best decision for everyone; even if they don't think so at the moment._

Matt who was still smiling looked at the confused expression on Steph's face, _Surely she understands what I was trying to imply as we have speculated about it for a good few months now. _Steph felt a tug on her arm as Matt wanted to pull Steph away so the pair of them were able to generate an interesting piece of information that would work in their favour however she resisted his attempts and replied. "Why don't you go and get yourself a top-up, I will be over in a minute after having a word with Eddie". Matt huffed and walked over to the drinks table where he was met with Jasmine and Grantly who were now decidedly tipsy. _I wonder what the matter with Steph is as I didn't notice that there was anything wrong with Eddie. I don't suppose she could be jealous of Eddie and Rachel could she?_ On looking back at Eddie and Steph he saw Steph placing her hand on Eddie's forearm; _I don't believe it Steph is jealous and she is trying to win Eddie from Rachel. I think she has a bit of a task on her hands and part of me doesn't want it to happen as I will lose a lot of money unless I can start a round of bets predicting Eddie and Steph. Hmm that's a good idea._

"Jasmine, have you ever noticed how close Eddie and Steph are, I will bet you £20 that by the end of the year they are together". Matt exclaimed as he had a large group o people in the room that accepted the proposal that Matt put forwards. _After all he is her friend so he would know her better than the rest of us._


	52. Chapter 52

Part 52

Rachel glanced at the windows which were streamed with congratulations banners; _the problem is don't feel much like celebrating today but they are my friends, so once more I will put my feelings to one side and concentrate on the needs of others. _Rachel considered the people who would be in the house, but her thoughts immediately stopped with the image of one face; Eddie.

_I don't know whether I want Eddie to be here, because it would make it easier if he wasn't as I wouldn't have a further battle on my hands as I wouldn't have to try and justify my decision. However at the same time, the friendship that the pair of us have doesn't deserve to end like this therefore it has to be sorted out and if the only way that I can sort it out is at this party then so be it. I would hate to leave Eddie on bad terms because I once hoped that our friendship would go further than that…I know it was unrealistic considering my past but once I hoped that he would see past that and we could start a proper relationship but I knew that when he wanted to start a relationship a few weeks ago. I wasn't ready and now it seems as though I have missed the opportunity. _

"Eddie is everything alright, because I can't help notice that you look distant" Steph asked as she was actually concerned about the man who she liked to consider as her friend. _I know I wasn't previously but over the last few months I have got to know Rachel and she trusts Eddie therefore I trust her judgement and I will also look for the good points about him._

"Yes Steph I'm fine" Eddie explained as he was getting exasperated at people asking him if he was ok. _How am I suppose to look when I have found out that the love of my life….perhaps I had better stop thinking that now…is leaving, how am i…we…going to manage without her._

"Do you remember that conversation that you and me had a few months ago now?" Steph asked Eddie and by the puzzled expression on his face she was aware that he didn't.

"We were talking about the pupils' incorrect use of the English Language and you mentioned the one word that you wanted to be banned. Do you remember what it is?"

Eddie smiled as he realised what Steph had done to him, "yes I remember the word 'fine'. _I never realised that she paid any attention to what I was saying I will have to be more careful what I say to her next time. I only said that to her because I was annoyed that Rachel kept saying she was 'fine' when she blatantly wasn't._

"Ok then I suppose I had better tell you" Eddie replied, he was pleased that he had someone else to tell but he wasn't sure whether it should have been the biggest gossip in the entire school, _but then she does look concerned at the minute._

"What!" Steph exclaimed due to the information that she had just been asked, the rest of the people in the room looked at Steph. Matt smiled at the sight before his eyes; _I wonder if she will agree to marrying him because I guess that's what he has just asked her. I know it is soon but I feel the par of them would work and I would hope to have some active part in the wedding._

"Do you know what I have realised?" Davina asked Tom as they reluctantly entered the kitchen through the back door. Tom looked at Davina puzzled; _I wonder what she is going to say. _"Well go on then tell me" Tom joked as he was worried by the serious expression that Davina's face held. "Well in 25 days, I'm going to be Mrs Clarkson" Tom laughed as he intentionally believed that it was something that was going to be of concern to him; _I get the impress that she approves of me moving the wedding closer than! Which reminds me; the other 3 guests haven't arrived yet…which is strange as I thought that they would be here by now._

"I think we had better tell Rachel that you should be a Maths teacher instead" Tom joked as the pair of them walked back into the lounge with Davina giving him a friendly punch in the arm as a form of response for his previous comment.


	53. Chapter 53

Part 53

Steph left Eddie promising that she would help Eddie; _but how surely I can't agree to what he is asking of me, perhaps Matt would have a good idea as how best to tackle the situation._

Steph noticed the other members of staff turn to face her as she graced them with her presence; _I wonder why they are all looking at me strangely perhaps I will get more sense out of Matt._ When Steph had located Matt she made strides towards him, "Watch out Mr. Lawson doesn't get jealous as you all claim that he prefers the illustrious leader" Grantly mumbled into her ear as she passed him which caused Steph to portray a confused expression; what is that suppose to mean?

Rachel took a deep breath and prepared herself for the confrontation which she may encounter when she entered the house. _I just hope that Eddie doesn't make it too awkward; if he is here because I didn't want to fall out with him as it was and it won't improve the situation if we aren't talking to one another. I can't decide whether I want him to have told anyone else because ideally I would prefer to do it because then I will be able to explain my decision without it including Eddie's biased views but at the same time I don't know whether I will be able to pretend to be happy about the decision again because I must have done a good job already; to convince Eddie that it was what I actually wanted; but then I was always good at hiding my emotions and closing my feelings off from the rest of the world._

Rachel hand gripped the car handle and involuntary pulled as though a force was dragging her inside. _Looks as though I had better get used to the idea of going inside the house and get into the celebratory mood because after all today isn't about me or even Eddie for that matter but it is about Tom and Davina; a couple who I know will be really happy with one another; even if I'm not here to witness it._

"Well you're a dark horse aren't you?" Matt asked when she reached him which only served to add to the confused expression; "I'm sorry I have no idea what you are talking about" Steph replied no getting quite annoyed at the cryptic clues that the rest of the staff were providing her with. _If they have dot something to say why don't they just come out and say it, I think I'm strong enough to take it._

"Well you and Eddie; I'm pleased for the pair of you" Matt exclaimed surprised as he couldn't believe that Steph was trying to deny it despite all the 'evidence' that he had witnessed she was still trying to deny it. _She must think that I'm stupid!_

"Matt what are you talking about there is nothing happening between me and Eddie" Steph replied as she was dumbfounded at her friend's recent suggestion. _Surely he must be joking but I'm not going to fall for it._

"Oh poor you, don't worry I will have a word with him and I will fix you two up soon. I will make him regret turning you down" Matt replied with compassion in his voice for his friend.

"Matt what are you talking about, he hasn't rejected me because I haven't asked him" Steph replied now understanding that Matt wasn't joking about this and was starting to question whether her friend knew her at all.

"Oh…but you are asking him" Matt asked as the alcohol that was circling his body was confusing his train of thought.

"NO Matt I'm not but I have got something to tell you" Steph replied now getting considerably annoyed with Matt. _Why would I want to start a relationship with Eddie…I guess he isn't that bad but it is clear that his heart belongs to Rachel. _Matt tried to disguise the interested expression that was etched on his face when Steph said 'how she had something to tell him' but failed miserably therefore Steph said, "Before you suggest it I'm not pregnant". The interested expression on Matt's face disappeared and he seemed genuine concerned about the news that his friend was going to relay from Eddie.

Rachel knocked on the door and waited patiently for it to be opened; despite every synapse in her body trying to pull her back to the comfort of her car and keep driving she knew that it wasn't fair; not to Tom, Davina, Eddie or even herself…_but why should I matter I will get everything that I deserve, because it's not unusual for me to be left broken hearted is it. _

"Hi Rachel, come in" Davina said as she opened the door to reveal a nervous looking Rachel on the door-step. _Well obviously she doesn't know about me leaving then. Perhaps Eddie isn't here._

"Well what are we going to do about it then?" Matt asked as he nor Steph wanted Rachel to leave the school as they knew the positive impact that she had placed upon it. _I actually think I prefer Matt's suggestion of Eddie asking me to marry him. I still have no idea how he came to that conclusion; perhaps I won't ever know._


	54. Chapter 54

Part 54

Rachel stood in the end of the room with the other guest looking back at her in anticipation. _Well it seems as though it is now or never._ The silence in the room was almost deafening therefore Rachel wanted to relieve the tension that was suffocating the life out of the room. "I guess you will be wanting your present then" Rachel exclaimed to Tom and Davina the two people who were at the centre of the crowd behind them.

"Well if you're offering" Tom joked back as the room was filled with a comfortable laughter which as strange as it sounded offered comfort to Rachel. _This just proves that life will continue without me so although some will falsely claim that it will be hard to continue without me they will remember this day and build on the memories that they are going to be witness too. _

"Ok then I had better make a speech…what do I say?" Rachel nervously laughed as she wanted to bide her goodbyes to the people in the room but in a subtle way which wouldn't result in unnecessary questions.

"When I look at the love that you have for one another, it makes me realise that life is perfect when you know that you have found your perfect match. I know that things haven't always been easy…they never are. But the strength that you provide each other with is…well unbelievable really. You are each others' rock and you would be lost without one another so I hope you are very happy together, Tom and Davina". Rachel stated which caused the other teachers to join in and raise their glasses to the pair in a toast.

Davina stepped forwards and embraced Rachel as both of the women had tears in their eyes. _you can see that I'm tired because normally I don't let my emotions show but I'm too tired to stop them particularly as throughout that speech I could only picture one person…most probably the person that I should be trying my hardest to forget at the minute; but that isn't very likely is it?_

_It doesn't look as though he is here though does it, because I've not seen him yet. I hope that he is ok because I know that he will come to terms with the decision soon and that he will eventually agree that it has been done in the best interests of the school._

It was then that she saw a silhouette walk past the door and head into the kitchen. _it looks as though he has just arrived, hopefully I can get to him before he says anything to anyone else as I don't think that I will be able to cope if they try to convince me that it is the wrong decision but I know that at the same time, I'm unable to go back on what we have already agreed._

"Ok then that is the plan we will just have to see whether we will be able to put it into operation as we may lack the opportunity which we crave however I'm sure TTG will be successful we always are". Steph replied enthusiastically to Matt as she was determined that Rachel wasn't going to get her own way and leave; _because I would miss her too much if she did as I hate to admit it but she is actually my role model due to the way that she has turned her life around therefore I would hate for her to leave because of what happened to Max as neither of us blame her._

Before Rachel was able to confront Eddie she was stopped by the sound of somebody calling her name. _What do they want, why can't they just leave me alone as I have things to sort out as I need to find another job perhaps an accountant as I can't allow myself to affect other people's lives by staying in teaching._

"Rachel before you run off, I have something to tell you" Steph started which caused Rachel to inwardly groan. _I like to consider Steph as a friend but when she started talking it is hard to stop her. No wonder Matt complains on ear ache. _

Putting all her feelings to one side, Rachel replied "Yes Steph what can I do for you" she was going to make a joke but on fear of extending the conversation she decided against it. _Although, it would probably be too obvious to use monosyllable answers._


	55. Chapter 55

Part 55

"Sorry Davina, got to love you and leave you…for a few minutes, because after all they may leave quicker if we speak to them because clearly ignoring them hasn't done any good" Tom laughed as he prepared himself for the feeling of loss that he always felt whenever he let go of Davina. _That makes me seem really sad but it's true I feel lonely whenever she isn't near me and although we may have only just left I feel lonely without her._

"You're not complaining about being with me are you Mr. Clarkson?" Davina asked with a smile on her face as she was subtly trying to extend the time before Tom would leave her. _I miss him whenever he isn't near to me because I know I lack the warmth that he provides when he wraps his arms around me but it feels more than that almost as if I am cold on the inside._

"You know me, soon to be… and I can't wait Mrs Clarkson…" Tom paused as the smile that he received took his breath away. _I'm so lucky to be marrying and I'm glad that I will be able to call her mine because I know that I'm the luckiest man in the world as that amazing smile is reserved especially for me. "_I love every minute that I spend with you and I will never complain" Tom finished his comment and ducked his head in embarrassment. _I'm just glad that none of my friends know about this comment as I'm sure that I would be the centre of all their jokes for ages but to a certain extent I wouldn't care because I know that the love that we feel for one another would most definitely be worth it._

"I know" Steph stated which she hoped would be enough for Rachel to understand what she was talking about. _I hope she doesn't try and deny it because I know that I need to help and if she is going to be awkward then it will only hinder the progress that we may make._

Rachel feigned confusion, _how would she know, she wasn't there and Eddie has just arrived, perhaps she doesn't really know and is talking about something else. But that isn't very realistic is it, oh well let's give it a go._

"I'm sorry Steph, what do you know?" Rachel asked and although she had tried to hide it; the panic in her voice told Steph that Rachel knew perfectly what she was talking about. _But it seems as though she needs a bit more persuasion to start talking therefore that is exactly what she will receive. Because I will get some answers from this woman, and before you ask, no it isn't just for the purpose of gossip, it's because I actually want to help, but we will have to see the way that the conversation goes._

"I know that you are leaving" Steph replied and saw the colour drain from Rachel's face. "So I think we need a little talk, don't you?" Steph appeared to ask a question but Rachel knew that it wasn't a question as much as a statement. _I had better come up with some reasonable answers then._

Jasmine was starting to get quite tipsy which was unusual for her as the last time she had drunk this much alcohol was at the Christmas party when she ended up dancing with Grantly. _I still haven't found out what happened as Steph told me that she had stopped everyone talking about it to save my embarrassment particular as Steph later told me that I kissed Grantly! How embarrassing; what must I have been thinking, I offered to buy Steph a round of drinks for a week as a way of saying thank you for keeping it quiet; needless to say it was an expensive week. _


	56. Chapter 56

Part 56

"Steph I don't know what you want me to say" Rachel started trying to bypass the situation that was facing the pair of them.

"How about the start and please make it the truth" Steph almost pleaded with Rachel; something that last year would have been unheard of her. Rachel glared back at her silently wishing that she didn't have to engage in this conversation at the moment.

"And you can stop that" Steph scolded Rachel who once more feigned innocence, "there's no getting past you today is there?" Rachel replied and prepared herself for explaining the truth. _I knew today was going to be a bad day._

"Has anyone ever told you how romantic and handsome you are?" Davina asked knowing that soon it was going to be blatantly obvious that she was doing.

"No I don't think so perhaps you had better show me later" Tom replied with a cheeky smile on his face. Tom and Davina lent forwards and closed the tiny gap which had existed between the pair of them throughout the entire conversation.

"Well I guess that Eddie has told you that I'm leaving…"Rachel paused as she didn't want the sadness in her voice to be evident as something that Steph was particular good at was understanding other people's emotions. _I managed to convince Eddie it was what I wanted therefore it should be easier to convince Steph._

Steph noticed the hesitance from Rachel's reply therefore she said, "just for the record, neither of us agree with that it is the right decision" Steph answered looking straight in Rachel's eyes as up until that moment it was the first time that they had let their eyes meet throughout the entire conversation. _I have the feeling that this is exactly what Rachel wants so I'm sure we can do something to convince her as I doubt it will require much effort…although she is extremely stubborn._

"I'm sorry I'm going to have to go, or I never will" Tom stated as he withdrew from the kiss and looked deep into Davina's eyes, "and is that a bad thing?" Davina asked as she felt Tom lean forwards and kissed her forehead, "see you in a bit" Tom replied and took a step away from Davina; but still had his arm wrapped around Davina's waist showing that he didn't actually want to leave her.

Rachel wanted to end the silence which surrounded the pair of them as at the moment Rachel knew that only Steph and Eddie knew about the decision which would affect a lot more people's lives than Rachel liked to consider. _Why do all my decision affect a lot of people, especially when I seem to make the wrong decision constantly? At least if it only affect me, it would only be my life which is ruined by it…but that doesn't bother me because I deserve everything that I get._

"Well that may be the case but it is happening" Rachel replied still trying to exit the conversation as quickly as possible. _Does she know that I don't want to do this and is that the reason why she is harassing me about it, because the more people talk about it, the harder it is going to be for me to leave but ultimately it is what I'm going to have to do as it is the only way that I can ensure the safety of the pupils. _


	57. Chapter 57

Part 57

Tom saw Grantly sitting in the corner and unwrapped his arm from around Davina's waist and walked towards him, _shall I be kind and warn him to keep away from Jasmine or shall we all just enjoy the entertainment which gets offered. It's perhaps a good job that neither Jasmine nor Grantly have facebook as they would have seen the horrific pictures that Steph uploaded of the pair of them at the Christmas party. But they didn't really kiss did they?_

Rachel had finished explaining to Steph the happenings in the meeting and Steph smiled when Rachel said Eddie had defended her against Ralph and was putting up a spirited defence towards Rachel's departure. _Well he would because he loves Rachel however it appears that they are the only ones who don't notice it. I wonder if that is why our very own Mr. Lawson requires Rachel to stay. I know it is a bit of a dirty trick but if she is intent on leaving perhaps I had better suggest that he tells her because I'm convinced that will change her mind as I know that she feels the same way due to the affection that she has in her eyes when she speaks his name._

"Hi Grantly" Tom said which made Grantly jump due to being caught reading his paper something that he thought until now he had kept hidden. _I guess I was going to be found out sooner or later but I just wished that I had been able to keep it quiet for longer as it is my sanctity, lets be honest I need it to work with these people; I'm surprised that Steph hasn't started on the karaoke. _Grantly looked around the room and was confused as he couldn't see her; sub-conscientiously he immediately looked at the area of the room where the drinks were served. _Hmm, this is worrying because she isn't at the microphone making a fool of herself and deafening the rest of us and she isn't propping up the drinks table, perhaps she has left and if she has gone then I would be able to and I may be able to read the paper in peace away from the other interruptions that I know that I'm going to face if I stay here._

"So Rachel do you want to leave?" Steph asked her deciding that despite her attempts to be subtle Rachel had seen through it and realised the motive behind each question that was asked. _Should I answer with my head or my heart?_

"Yes Steph, I want to leave" Rachel replied sounded bored with the line of enquiry but in reality it was the hope that Steph would realise she wasn't going to extract anymore information.

However Steph wasn't going to give up that easily; _I'm not going to let the two most valuable members of staff leave because they are too stubborn to admit their feelings for another. _"Why".

Rachel looked back at Steph in disbelieve; _why does she want to know the reasons behind me leaving but perhaps if I tell her she will leave me alone. _"I want to leave because I have been at the school for 2 years and I consider that to be long enough as I have itchy feet and consider it time to move on" Rachel replied but resisting looking in Steph's eyes as she knew that her feelings would give her away.

"Now tell me the truth" Steph replied as she was aware that what Rachel had just told her wasn't the true. _It might have been lightly more convincing if she looked me in the eye when she said it._

"That is the truth" Rachel tried to insist but it lacked the conviction behind it therefore Rachel contemplated the possibility of having to tell Steph the truth.

"You don't want me to get Eddie do you?" Steph asked and instantly Rachel shook her hand, "therefore I think you had better tell me"

Davina had been gazing at Tom for the last few minutes, was interrupted by somebody linking arms with her; she spun around and saw herself propping up a now drunk Jasmine. _What is it with this woman and alcohol why can't she control how much she drinks?_ Davina thought as she took pity on the woman and started to walk towards the sofa in the corner where they would be able to sit in peace as the music was slightly quieter there. "Come on its quieter here" Davina said as she gently lowered Jasmine into the seat and sat down beside her with her gaze once more finding Tom.

After a couple of minutes of silence, Jasmine looked at Davina and followed her gaze, "you can't take your eyes off him can you?" Jasmine asked her with a giggle as the alcohol rushed to her head leaving her with a throbbing head ache as the music seemed to have gone straight through her.

Davina felt the colour rise in her cheeks at being so obvious, "no I can't, I really love him you know" she said but ducked her head in embarrassment which was only stopped by the sound of laughter as Davina looked at Jasmine and saw her resting her head on the arm of the chair looking in a very sorry state.

"Shouldn't it be him you're marrying then?" Jasmine asked starting to get incredibly confused and the high concentration on alcohol in her blood only seemed to compound the confusion.

"I'm sorry to tell you dear that I am…in six weeks" Davina replied with a smile on her face which was an involuntary reaction whenever she thought of the impending marriage.

"That's quick for a divorce as well isn't it" Jasmine asked and now Davina was getting confused. _But Tom isn't married is he? Surely he would have thought to have told me before things had got this serious between the pair of us._


	58. Chapter 58

Part 58

"Ok then…" Rachel paused as she looked out of the kitchen window and Steph could see how torn that Rachel was. _I wish that I could do something to make it easier for her but what can I do? _Steph stepped forwards and wrapped her arm around Rachel's shoulders, "come on Rachel if you tell me I might be able to help you" Steph countered Rachel's hesitance. This seemed to offer Rachel comfort but some of it was because she was too tired to continue fighting therefore she eventually agreed that it may help to tell somebody else. _Perhaps telling Steph will help me as it will put it all in perspective without having the personal issues that Eddie would feel if I told him. I know that the hurt look on Eddie's face would make me what to reconsider but I know that in the long run it would only make me resent Eddie because I would feel that the only reason that I was still at the school was because of him, therefore it would most probably put pay to any possible relationship that the pair of may have… but then I don't know his feelings towards me, they may be purely friendship; if that any more._

"Hi Tom" Grantly replied; hoping that Tom would leave him in peace but it was obvious to Grantly that Tom had no intention of leaving anytime soon, _perhaps I had better make the best of a bad situation because there are worse people in the room to talk to, perhaps it is kinder for everyone if I don't name them._

"So then Tom, where is Steph as I have noticed that she hasn't been swanning about for quite a long time" Grantly asked hoping that he was being obvious to the fact that he wanted to leave the party which in his opinion was dull and boring.

"I ..I…don't really want to leave" Rachel paused as she was struggling to find the words that expressed her feelings and emotions to Steph. _I never thought that Steph would be the one person that I would feel that I was able to confide in._

"So if you don't want to leave why are you?" Steph asked as to her it seemed to be a rather simple answer that she would receive. _Surely if Rachel doesn't want to leave it is easy; she doesn't have to._

"Because I don't have a choice" Rachel replied the tears starting to well in her eyes; _I wish that Steph would pretend that it was so easy to stay because it isn't; but I know that I wish that I could stay but it is never going to happen._

"Of course you do, everybody always has a choice" Steph replied as she squeezed Rachel's shoulders trying to reassure her slightly.

"No I honesty don't have a choice because it was either I resigned or I was sacked" Rachel admitted and Rachel looked out of the window once more as the feeling of loss overcame her once more. _I wish that I didn't have to leave._

"Don't worry we will sort it out" Steph replied and the pair of them walked into the lounge to rejoin the party atmosphere. _I can see her problem but I'm still not letting her leave._

"Jas what do you mean, Tom isn't already married" Davina replied as she tried to put her own mind at ease due to the sudden increase in panic due to the fear that Tom was already married.

Jasmine believed that she had misheard Davina therefore she replied, "but surely it will mean that there are a lot of people left incredibly unhappy, what about poor Tom".

Davina looked aghast and answered, "I'm not that bad you know" starting to get confused because she was used to the friendly banter that the pair of them had but this sounded serious. _I'm not that bad am I?_

"Oh so you are going to tell him then?" Jasmine asked as she was starting to get confused with the entire conversation.

"Surprisingly he already knows" Davina replied with a smile as once more the topic of her wedding was about to be spoken; something that always brought a smile to her lips.

"Oh how did he take it" Jasmine asked as she couldn't understand how he could be so understanding. _Perhaps I had better play along as it may be entertaining because after all she is so drunk she wouldn't exactly know any better would she, but then she is my friend so perhaps that would be a bit cruel. _


	59. Chapter 59

Part 59

Steph and Matt looked between Rachel and Eddie amazed that they had actually been avoiding one another since Rachel had returned into the room; following her discussion with Steph.

"Oi Steph do you think that something has happened between Rachel and Eddie" Matt asked getting excited as he loved the potential gossip that he was going to be provided with.

However Steph hadn't been particularly listening as she was preoccupied with her own thoughts as she was trying to contemplate how she was going to her Rachel to stay. _It isn't only Eddie who wants Rachel to stay as the own school need her to stay._

"Can we rewind the conversation and start again because I think the pair of us"…._or more specifically you… "_have got confused". Davina asked Jasmine who was now starting to feel the effects of the alcohol as she massaged the temples on her forehead.

Well you were talking about how much you love him but I was aware that Grantly was already married" Jasmine replied as she rested her head against Davina's shoulder as the alcohol was taking an effort on her. Davina started laughing which caused Jasmine to glare at Davina annoyed at the sudden increase in volume as it didn't help the impending headache.

"What are you laughing at?" Jasmine asked beginning to get past caring about Davina's recent revelation.

"Well surely you don't believe that I like Grantly do you because it was Tom I was looking at; not Grantly" Davina replied and laughed further at Jasmine due to her intentional belief.

"Yes" Steph replied as she was unaware as to what she had just agreed to. _I hope it isn't anything too embarrassing but Matt seems to be in a strange mood today, perhaps I had better start listening._

"So do you think they had done something they regret" matt asked sensing the opportunity to make some money, _because the way that they are avoiding eye contact gives the impression that they have done something that neither of them wants to remember. I was thinking that it was a long meeting but we need them to admit to it as we are never going to get Grantly to pay without it._

Steph who was now listening looked back at Matt disgusted, "don't be stupid surely you have more important things to do than gossiping about Rachel and Eddie as we all know that they love one another however I doubt that a long distance relationship will work" Steph put her hand to her mouth as she realised that she had spoken to much and now everybody was going to find out Rachel's secret although Steph had promised to keep it quiet. _What have I done, I promised that I wouldn't tell anyone else by now I have just told Matt and we all know how chatty he can get when he has had a fair but to drink which would be an acceptable comment about his current state._

"Why would it be a long distance relationship?" Matt asked as to his knowledge both Rachel and Eddie were staying therefore it wouldn't be necessary for it to be a long distance relationship. _Unless Steph is trying to tell me that one of them is leaving, but I wonder which one?_ The horrified expression on Steph's face confirmed his initial belief.

"Please don't say anything it is meant to be a secret as I only found out earlier and at the moment we need to create a plan to ensure that Rachel doesn't leave". Steph replied as they both looked between Rachel and Eddie who were absorbing the sight of the other person almost as if they were trying to make it a permanent fixture in their memory so it would get them through the lonely days and nights.

The room was filled with a hushed silence as the guest took a couple of moments to try and come to the decision that they had all had enough to drink and the conversation had come to a close as the tiredness and alcohol started to take hold on even the hardened drinkers.

The music was still blaring in the background of the room and due to the peaceful silence which had descended upon the room they listened to the lyrics of the song and for two people in particular it seemed to have a special meaning almost as if it captured the story of their life.

**Two 'o clock and I wish that I was sleeping  
You're in my head like a song on the radio  
All I know is that I got to get next to you  
Yeah I got to get next to you  
Sitting here turning minutes into hours  
To find the nerve just to call you on the telephone  
You don't know that I got to get next to you**

Maybe were friends  
Maybe were more  
Maybe it's just my imagination  
But I see you stare just a little too long  
And it makes me start to wonder  
So baby call me crazy  
But I think you feel it too  
Maybe I, Maybe I  
Just got to get next to you  


The furniture which had been pushed aside created the effect of a dance floor therefore it resulted in the couples in the room taking one another hands and swaying together to the music. One of the first couples was Tom and Davina as they had been longing to rejoin one another ever since they had parted to try and mingle with the guest which had joined them.

"Come on Matt whether you like it or not you are going to dance with me as there are only 4 people who aren't dancing and hopefully they will feel pressured into dancing with one another.


	60. Chapter 60

Part 60

**I asked around and I heard that you were talking  
Told my girl that you thought I was out of your league  
What a fool, I got to get next to you, whoa  
Yeah it's five in the morning and I can't go to sleep  
'Cause I wish, yeah I wish that you knew what you mean to me  
Baby let's get together and end this mystery, oh  
**

Rachel was looking around the room hoping that somebody would end the lonely feeling that she felt ever since the other couples had started to take one another's hands and lead them on the dance floor. _Why am I always left alone, I guess it is to do with my past and I should be used to rejection; it's not as though it has never happened before, although it doesn't stop it hurting because even Grantly has found somebody to dance with. _Rachel was intrigued to find out who the woman in Grantly's arms was, _because I know that it isn't Fleur because I heard that she was at bingo, so I wonder who it is? _After observing the situation for a little while longer, Rachel realised who it was. _Oh dear, it's Jasmine, I wonder if something is happening between the pair of them as they always seemed very close and although they pretend it argue and fall out it isn't unusual for relationships to start that way; look at me and Eddie; although that hasn't lasted because I'm stupid and I ended it due to a fear of getting hurt. I should have realised that Eddie would never hurt me but now it is too late to do anything about it. I better stop speculating about Jasmine and Grantly because I sound like Steph; although the help that she has given me; I'm starting to believe isn't necessarily a bad thing and I could sound and behave like people who are a lot worse._

**Maybe were friends  
Maybe were more  
Maybe it's just my imagination  
But I see you stare just a little too long  
And it makes me start to wonder  
So baby call me crazy  
But I think you feel it too  
Maybe I, Maybe I  
Just got to get next to you  
**

Rachel looked for the one person that her heart longed for; Eddie. _I don't know whether to be pleased that he isn't dancing with anyone because it means that I still have a chance but at the same time it means that he is lonely and feels as awkward as I do and I wouldn't want that because he doesn't deserve it. He deserves to be loved by someone special; that rules me out then._

Despite Rachel's head telling her to look away her eyes refused to move until eventually they met with Eddie's; who seemed to be in a similar situation as her.

**Whatcha got to say? Whatcha got to do?  
How ya get the one you want to want to get next to you?**

****"Why who are the other two people?" Matt asked as unknown to him Steph had taken his hand and was beginning the task of dragging him to the newly created dance floor.

"Well who do you think?" she resorted not knowing how someone who had taken such a keen interest in their life's for the entire evening would miss out on all the juicy bits of gossip.

**Whatcha got to say? Whatcha got to do?  
How ya get the one you want to want to get next to you?**

Whatcha got to say? Whatcha got to do?  
How ya get the one you want to want to get next to you?

Whatcha got to say? Whatcha got to do?  
How ya get the one you want to want to get next to you?  
Yeah, yeah, to want to get next to you

Maybe were friends  
Maybe were more  
Maybe it's just my imagination  
But I see you stare just a little too long  
And it makes me start to wonder  
So baby call me crazy  
But I think you feel it too  
Baby call me crazy  
But I know you feel it too  
Maybe I, Maybe I  
Just got to get next to you  
Yeah, yeah, yeah  
I got to get next to you

Rachel watched as Eddie walked towards her; with a stretched-out hand using his persona he gestured for Rachel to capture it with her hand. However Rachel had different emotions whirling through her head; _Should I go with my head and reject him or should I go with my heart and the belief that the relationship may work; what should I do?_


	61. Chapter 61

Part 61

The weeks since the surprise party had flown by but there was still no change in the relationship between Rachel and Eddie as they were still suppressing their feelings due to the knowledge that as long as Rachel was leaving there was no chance of them having a relationship. _Although it isn't from want of trying; as me and Rachel hadn't been ignoring one another but we seemed to have talked about everything else apart from her impending departure and the way we feel about one another._ However I'm not going to let it fade away as I know that my feelings won't go away and I need to see whether she feels the same way as me.

"I can't believe that we are getting married on Saturday!" Davina said as she gazed into Tom's eyes for the umpteenth time that day. _I will never get bored of looking in Tom's eyes as they tell me everything that I need to know about our relationship; his eyes tell me, everything that his words can't explain._

"I know neither can I; it seems to have come around so quickly but at the same time I feel as though I have had to wait too long" Tom replied which caused Davina to look at him with confusion etched on her face. "What do you mean" she asked and Tom smiled back at her; "don't worry it's nothing bad but what I mean is all the time that it has taken for me to marry you could have resulted in me losing you as you may have found someone who deserves you a lot more than I do" Tom replied and instantly Davina grinned back at him remembering a conversation that she had with Jasmine 6 weeks ago.

"Well according to Jasmine, you may have lost me to Grantly as she was convinced that I had feelings for him" Davina replied with a smile on her face which was met with a stony-glare from Tom. "I always thought that there was something going on"

Davina looked at Tom confused; "surely you can't believe her" she replied indignant. _He should know that I will never cheat on him particularly as I have been cheated on and I know what it feels like._

Rachel was sitting in her sanctity and was enjoying the tranquillity that it offered; _although I'm only here for a week because after that I'm leaving. _ _I guess that Ralph got his way but not to worry because I think I would have had to leave eventually anyway and we have Tom and Davina's wedding to look forward to._ Rachel closed her eyes and reflected upon her relationship with Eddie; something that over the recent days was becoming a regular occurrence; _probably because I know that I'm going to have to give it up when I leave._

**Rachel watched as Eddie walked towards her; with a stretched-out hand using his persona he gestured for Rachel to capture it with her hand. However Rachel had different emotions whirling through her head; **_**Should I go with my head and reject him or should I go with my heart and the belief that the relationship may work; what should I do?**_

Tom laughed, "you are far to easy to trick do you know that?" due to this remark he received a punch on the arm from Davina, "you have to stop doing that because I don't know whether you are serious or not"

**She actually surprised herself because despite preparing herself to reject Eddie again she found that she was unable to and resulted in her capturing Eddie's hand with her own and the surge of electricity raced through the pair of their bodies. **Rachel smiled at the memory and continue her reminisce about the party. **The feelings for Eddie started to rise to the surface and despite her doing her best efforts to contain them; Rachel seemed to be fighting a losing battle.**

**The pair of them joined the other couples on the dance-floor and they started swaying to the music listening to the words both realising the connection that it held for the pair of their life.**

**The music ended and the pair of them smiled embarrassed at one another as they were aware of the other staff members who were watching the pair of them in their very public display of affection.**

"**Well you weren't as bad a dancer as I thought you may be" Rachel joked with Eddie as they retreated to the kitchen to avoid having to dance to the latest track which neither of them knew and they both quite honesty considered to be far too modern for the pair of them.**

Rachel was pulled from her memories due to the sound of someone knocking on her door, _I knew today was too quiet to be true. "_Come in" Rachel called.


	62. Chapter 62

Part 62

Eddie was sitting in the staffroom thinking about the party where him and Rachel admitted their feelings for one another however it was due to the body language that was used between the pair rather than a public admittance.

**The pair of them were standing alone in the kitchen both of them trying to regulate their heart beat as they were aware of the close proximity which they were stood in; something which only served to increase their heart beat following the dancing. "Eddie can you get the glasses down for us please" Rachel asked gesturing to the two crystal glasses on the shelf out of her reach.**

**Eddie smirked and replied, "Well I don't know considering that you insulted my dancing" he grinned at the end of the statement enjoying the teasing of Rachel partly because she trusted him enough to let him do it.**

**Without a seconds thought, Rachel replied, "no I didn't I was actually kind saying it wasn't as bad as I expected" Rachel smiled back at him because despite the dryness of her throat; begging for drink; she was enjoying the teasing that the pair of them had engaged in; which was surprising particularly considering that Eddie had given Rachel the cold shoulder as he was still upset about the decision which she made a few hours earlier in the meeting with Ralph.**

"**Well it isn't exactly complimentary is it?" Eddie asked and he walked to the other side of the kitchen indicating that he wasn't getting the glasses down any time soon.**

"**Eddie please, I'm becoming very dehydrating" Rachel answered trying to play on Eddie's conscience and make him feel guilty.**

"**Don't be such a drama queen!" Eddie responded with a smile on his face due to the way that Rachel was massively exaggerating.**

"**Me drama queen; I think not" Rachel replied enjoying the banter as it was at this time that Rachel was able to forget that in 6 weeks this would be a distant memory which would never be happening again. **

"**Please Eddie" Rachel asked with an expression in her eyes that she knew Eddie wasn't going to refuse.**

**Eddie walked behind Rachel and took the two glasses from the shelf, however Eddie has misjudged the distance and it resulted in Rachel leaning back into him. He could smell her shampoo and perfume; which resulted in him taking deep breaths almost as if he was committing the smell to memory.**

**Rachel turned around so she was facing him, the pair of their eyes became transfixed on the others. The pair of them closed the gap as their heads gravitated towards one another; at that moment neither of them cared that they were in the company of two o the biggest gossips as they were only interesting in ensuring that the other person knew exactly how deeply their feelings ran.**

Eddie was pulled from his reminisce with the sound of Steph's voice as she joined Eddie in the staff room. "Anywhere nice?" She asked which caused Eddie to express his confusion.  
"Sorry Steph what do you mean?" _Maybe the more time you spend with her, the more sense she makes with her comments. The worrying thing is I may have to find out because when Rachel leaves I will have lost my best friend…and lover, so I hope that if I'm always surrounded by people I will trick myself into believing that I'm not as lonely and missing her as my heart is trying to tell me._

"Well the distant expression and smile on your face tells me that you weren't thinking about your next lesson" Steph replied trying to get some information from Eddie.

"No I wasn't I was thinking about…" Eddie paused realising that telling the school's biggest gossip that he had been thinking about Rachel probably wasn't the best idea particularly when he saw the excited expression on her face when he started explaining.

The abrupt stop in the sentence resulted in Steph asking a question trying to calculate Eddie's feelings for Rachel, "So what do you think about Rachel leaving?" Steph asked and judging on the expression on Eddie's face, this hadn't been phrased very well.

Needless to say the anger was starting to rise in Eddie, _how does she think I will be feeling, the woman I love is leaving, but then I suppose she may not know that I love her although due to the amount of gossip that she does, she should have at least speculated on the relationship between me and Rachel. _The anger in Eddie had subsided as he remembered that he may require Steph as a friend soon.

"Well of course, I'm not very happy about it and I would do anything if it ensured that she could stat" Eddie replied honestly and was surprised that Steph made no comment about the strength of his feelings towards Rachel.

Steph looked back at Eddie and asked what she was considering to be a sensible question, "so what have you done to make her stay?" Whether it was the abruptness of the question or the way Steph was encouraging Rachel to stay, Eddie looked confused and once again annoyed. "I haven't done anything" he replied honestly which resulted in Steph looking horrified.

"What! You're going to let the woman that you love leave you?" Steph asked and immediately Eddie's mind went into overdrive. _What can I do to make Rachel stay and will she appreciate the effort._

"I didn't say that I love Rachel" Eddie replied trying to deny the rumour which he was convinced would be soon circulating about him and Rachel. _I had better try and deny it because I know Rachel likes to keep her private life private._

Steph smiled and Eddie could only presume that it was due to him trying to deny his feelings for Rachel, "Eddie, you didn't have to say. I can tell". _I suppose that there isn't much point in me trying to deny it then is there? But it still hasn't helped so unless Steph has a bright idea the outcome will remain the same._


	63. Chapter 63

Part 63

"Well have you told her?" Steph asked and once more Eddie was left confused. _This woman really is confusing, _"Steph, what am I meant to have told her?" he asked getting extremely frustrated at the way Steph wasn't giving him much help to answer her 'challenging' questions. _Doesn't she know that my mind is elsewhere?_

"Tell her that you love her" Steph replied amazed at the way Eddie hadn't contemplated this however before Eddie was able to reply, Matt had bounded into the staff room looking incredibly excited as he had heard Steph's last sentence.

"Who has Eddie got to tell that he loves?" Matt asked looking eager to find out any gossip that he would be able to pass onto anybody else. However he didn't receive a reply as Steph glared at him believing that it was totally obvious as nearly every conversation between the pair of them speculated on Rachel's and Eddie's feelings for one another in one shape or form.

"You two are a very good indication as to why I'm happy single" Steph replied as she directed her gaze between Matt and Eddie.

Before Steph and Matt got into an argument, Eddie said, "I'm going to do go and see what she says" to which he stood up and walked out of the staff room with the sounds of the pair of them shouting "good luck".

"Well Mattie boy, our Mr. Lawson has just admitted that he has feelings for a one Miss Mason" Steph replied with a giggle and as a form of response, Matt held his hand up to which Steph returned the gesture in a child-like high five.

"I think we can safely say TTG strike again" Matt continued in their celebration but halted when they noticed Tom and Davina to walk into the staffroom however the pair of them had already witnessed the conversation therefore Tom asked, "What are you celebrating, the wedding of the year isn't until Saturday, you know" he joked with the pair of them as once more Tom and Davina got lost within each others eyes.

Steph and Matt decided to platy a joke on the pair of them "sorry we won't be able to make the wedding" the pair of them noticed the way that Tom's and Davina's face had dropped.

"Oh ok" the pair replied failing to hide the disappointment because although the gossiping ways of the pair frustrated and annoyed people they were valuable members of staff and the pair of them wanted them at the wedding.

Matt saw the Steph was trying hard to contain the laughter therefore he continued in the staged 'apology'. "It's because we thought that it was next week so we have made a plan for this Saturday" Before he was able to continue, Steph appeared to interrupt him and said, "how did we get the date wrong, I feel bad about it now, don't you?" Tom and Davina exchanged puzzled expressions because Matt and Steph were talking as if they weren't there.

Matt acted as though he was answering Steph's question, "well I think it may have been easier to remember if they had spoken about it at every possible opportunity" The fixed smile was affixed on both of their faces made Davina suspicious and it was due to that sentence that she realise they were both joking.

"Ha-ha, very funny, you two. I thought it was strange that you weren't coming as there is free alcohol". Davina replied which caused them all to look at Steph and noticed the way her mouth twitched into a larger smile with the words 'free alcohol'.

"I have had this argument before, why does everyone think I'm obsessed with alcohol, I could easily go without it" Steph replied to which the other three people in the room raised their eyebrows at her. _Great what did I say that for? _"Perhaps not go without but you get my point" Steph replied quickly hoping that they wouldn't make further comment.


	64. Chapter 64

Part 64

Eddie walked into Rachel's office with the sound of Steph's words echoing through his head, _so if they have noticed then surely Rachel must have, and hopefully feels the same way as me. But then I won't know if I don't tell her although I don't know what good it will do because she is leaving in a week. _Eddie was too wrapped up in his own thoughts to realise that he had knocked on the door and the sound of Rachel's voice greeted him from behind one of her many barriers.

"Come in" Eddie depressed the handle and opened her office door; _if only her barriers were as easy to break down._

The nerves started to rise in Eddie as he was scared of the distinct possibility that she would reject his advances. The sound of her voice broke him from his negative thoughts. He saw her stand up and walk from behind yet another of her barriers. _I seem to be breaking her barriers down fairly well today so perhaps there is some hope for me._

She walked towards him and Eddie wanted to pull her into his arm and declare his undying love for her; _however I don't think that Rachel would appreciate that._

She gestured for Eddie to follow her to the sofa and Eddie felt nervous again as he realised that soon he would have to confess his motives for entering her office. On sitting down Eddie noticed how close the pair of them were sitting particularly when Rachel turned to face Eddie.

Rachel asked how she could help Eddie and this comforted Eddie because when he was trying to pluck up enough confidence to come; this was how he had imagined the conversation starting. As a result he was relieved because he knew that he would be able to talk about the issue without being sidetracked and spending the entire visit talking about something else.

The conversation continued until Eddie had summoned enough confidence to tell Rachel. _I hope she feels the same way because I couldn't stand it if she didn't as she is the woman that I love and if in later years I went out with anyone else I know I would be comparing them to Rachel and I know that they wouldn't match up to her because she is perfect and everything I want and need._

"Rachel I have something to tell you…" Eddie started and was relieved that Rachel didn't instantly dismiss it out of hand. _Surely that is a good thing._


	65. Chapter 65

Part 65

The door swung open and in walked a man who Rachel liked to consider her closest ally and friend. _However I think I lost that right when I agreed to Ralph's demands; perhaps I should have put up a better fight to stay but it is too late now._

"Hello Eddie" Rachel smiled at him and she was still surprised that they were on speaking terms; _I liked the fact that he cared about me…or the school, to try and persuade me to stay but I think we both know that it wasn't practical or realistic so it is a decision that we will both have to get used to…but I promise you it won't be easy to get used to as it hasn't sunk in yet that I'm leaving._

Rachel stood up from the chair behind one of her physical barriers to walk towards the sofa gesturing f0or Eddie to follow her. Once seated; Rachel turned in the seat to face Eddie and it was only now did the pair of them realise how closely they were seated. _Perhaps I could lean forwards and feel his lips upon mine for one last time however I don't think that is fair for either of us; as it would leave the pair of us heartbroken- longing for more contact something that neither of us would be able to wholeheartedly offer the other. I have to be more professional as it is the only way that I will contain the urges to have a final relationship which threatened to engulf the pair of us but at the same time never quite had us in its clutches. _

"So Eddie how can I help you?" Rachel asked in the most professional voice that she could manage, but at the same time she was struggling to maintain eye-contact with Eddie's eyes; normally the one place that kept her attention however at the moment, the only thing that had her attention was the burning desire within her to kiss Eddie something that she knew from past experience was a bad idea.

"Well Rachel I have something to tell you" Eddie replied in a voice which was filled with nerves. Eddie was nervous.

_Something must be bad because the whole two years that I have known him, I have never seen him nervous before. I wonder whether I will be able to help him like he has helped me over the past couple of years._

Rachel looked concerned at Eddie; _what if I am unable to offer the support to him to the same extent that he has done for me, perhaps I won't be able to tell him the things that he will need to hear._

"OK, I'm all ears, what's the problem" Rachel joked hoping to lighten the darkened mood which had descended upon Rachel's office in the minutes following Eddie's arrival.

"Well…" Eddie stopped and Rachel saw him take a deep breath, Rachel noticing Eddie's need for comfort, she used the small distance between them to her advantage as she reached her hands out and took each of his hands with hers. This seemed to have the desired effort which not only comforted Eddie but also Rachel; with the belief that she was as good a friend to him as he was to her. _Although I wish that he would tell me what is wrong because I'm starting to get worried as I have never seen him like this before and I have no idea as to what would have caused it. Perhaps he has found another woman who loves him how he deserves to be loved and he is trying to tell me so maybe I have made it worse by holding his hands._

When Rachel was criticising herself, Eddie had put his thoughts into a coherent sentence therefore he continued.

"I was sitting at home last night when I realised that in a few weeks we won't be sitting here like this" Eddie's eyes were transfixed upon Rachel's and as a result of the harsh reality of the situation hit Rachel almost as if she had been physically hit, Eddie had paused therefore Rachel replied, "yes" however it was said in a dubious voice as she was unsure of Eddie intentions with the recent statement and Rachel wasn't sure if this was Eddie's long winded way of telling her that he had found someone else. _If he does I hope my acting skills are better than I imagine them to be because I don't want the hurt to be shown on my face. I guess that despite knowing that me and Eddie don't have a future it would still hurt if I knew that he had found someone else and I was no longer the person who he would unload his problems onto._

"Well…" the nerves had most definitely returned and Rachel took a deep breath preparing herself mentally and physically for Eddie's revolution.


	66. Chapter 66

Part 66

Eddie found the words he was searching for therefore he continued "I have something to tell you because if I don't tell you now I never will" Eddie stated and due to the expression on Eddie's face she knew exactly what he was going to say to her. _I actually think it is worse than him telling me that he is with someone else because it shows that he is also stuck in the past. The past, which has shaped our future; for one of misery and heartbreak._

"Eddie please don't" Rachel replied almost pleading with Eddie not to continue with his statement as she knew that it wasn't what either of them needed to hear as it would only serve to make her departure harder for the pair of them.

However Eddie was insistent as the tears started to glisten within his eyes, this made Rachel want to wrap her arms around him and tell him that everything would be 'fine'; something that he had done for her on the rare occasions that Rachel broke down in front of someone. "But if I don't tell you now, I never will" Rachel looked into Eddie's eyes contemplating what would be less painful for the man that she loved. _What have I done to him; he is normally so strong but here he is standing in front of me looking broken._

"No Eddie, let's leave it as something wonderful; something wonderful that was never said". They both closed the gap between the pair of them, Rachel placed her left hand on Eddie's cheek and they shared what they both recognised to be their last kiss.

The bell rang and Eddie groaned, "Sorry I've got to go I promised that I would help Steph" Eddie explained as he stood up and gave Rachel another longing look.

Rachel rested her head on the back of her chair, hoping that she had been able to tell Eddie what he wanted to hear. _I guess that is our goodbye then. _Rachel thought and felt considerable alone therefore she walked towards the radio that was in the corner and despite considering it highly unprofessional she switched the radio on to drown out the silence. _But I had better get used to it as it is something that I know I will have a lot more of when I leave._ As previously she considered silence to be peaceful however now it gave her time to reflect upon missed opportunities and events that she wished could be different.

The sound of a woman's voice filled Rachel's office and Rachel listened intently to the words knowing that work was going to be limited.

**Is there anything that can make you happy?  
I don't know what to say to make it better  
Seeing you like this, down and hurt so badly  
When you have been so kept together**

What's this?  
All this time I thought you didn't need me  
Now I've gone from you and now you tell me

You're in love, but that's not what it was  
All those times that passed by with no signs  
And now you're telling me  
You miss me, boy why couldn't I see?  
And my heart don't agree with what you're telling me

You were nonchalant, strong, and unaffected  
And you never wanted me to be there  
I never saw your heart, that's how close you kept it  
So right now I'm so unsure how to care

What's this?  
All this time I thought you didn't need me  
Now I've gone from you and now you tell me

Rachel was listening to the song with the hope that if she told herself that she didn't love Eddie then she may actually believe it. _I thought I could convince myself that he didn't feel the same way so the relationship wouldn't work anyway but he has made it harder to know that I have just rejected him. At least it is Friday afternoon so I don't have to see him for the whole weekend apart from at Tom and Davina's wedding however surely I can keep my feelings at bay because it won't be my day; it will be theirs._


	67. Chapter 67

Part 67

The door bell sounded and a weary Davina padded down the stairs to answer it. _I knew it was a bad idea letting Steph come around last night, the alcohol and my nerves have resulted in a very bad night sleep but then there is a upside...in a few hours, I'm going to be Mrs. Clarkson!_

Davina pulled back the latch and expected to see some of her Waterloo Road colleagues standing on her doorstep however the sight amazed her. "Surprise!" was called to her by the unexpected guest and despite the sound of her shouting which increased the rapid thumping in her head she was too pleased to care.

As on the doorstep stood one of her closest friends; who to Davina's knowledge was in New Zealand and unable to get back in time for the wedding.

"What, how, why?" Davina asked in a flurry of questions as Holly pulled Davina forwards and embraced her in a hug.

"Calm down, I'm not going anywhere and those questions are really easy to answer. I'm Holly Johnson and I'm here to provide all those embarrassing childhood memories which I will happy provide to the people who at the moment probably consider you to be fairly normal". The two woman laughed but at the same time Davina was cringing at the possible embarrassing memories she may choose to disclose. Holly replied while Davina gestured for her to follow her into the house. But all the way into the lounge, Davina never removed her eyes from Holly, which caused Holly to laugh, "I would say you can pinch me to check if I'm real but it may hurt so please can you just take my word for it". The two woman laughed again as they sat next to one another on the sofa while they answered each others questions to fill in the last 4 years; which was the time that Holly decided she wanted to go travelling and they lost contact due to living in two totally different worlds; something that they promised would never happen.

Davina asked the question which had been intriguing her ever since Holly's arrival, "how come you sent your apologies before as you wouldn't have been able to come to the summer wedding however you are here for the wedding today" Davina realising that soon the pair of them would have more company from the fellow Waterloo Road woman who were attending the wedding.

"Yes well I had a phone call from a certain Tom Clarkson asking whether I was able to come to the wedding" Holly replied and smiled at the shocked expression on Davina's face as it was apparent that she knew nothing about it. "Which reminds me, what happened to the idea that the husband-material had to be checked by the other person" Holly asked with a laugh as she knew how hard it was for them to keep in touch therefore this promise was doomed for failure.

The man in question was in a similar position to Davina as he was beginning to worry about the wedding; _Perhaps I shouldn't have moved it forward as something is definitely going to go wrong as why would I be lucky enough to marry Davina perhaps I should call it off now to try and stop some of the humiliation. _

Throughout the negative thoughts Tom had sat down on the sofa with his state of dress being anything but suitable for marrying the love of his life. Tom was worrying to such an extent that he didn't notice another person's presence as they sat down beside him on the sofa.

"Hey mate, I know you have to wear formal clothes for work and you don't particularly like doing it however I think this is one of the rare occasions where you should because I know that you're bride is going to show you up but you could at least act as though you have tried to compete". Before Tom was able to stop himself he muttered, "That's if she turns up" which shocked the pair of them, Tom trying to resist having to explain further ducked his head and once more started struggling with the cufflinks.

However the person beside Tom wanted an explanation, "Tom as your friend and best man, I need to know what you meant by that because in 6 hours you will have married the love of your life, and all these nerves will have been for nothing" he stated and turned to face Tom almost as though he was demanding some answers.

The colour started to rise in Tom's cheeks as he knew that he was just nervous but it also caused the self-pitying that he was about to reveal. "It's just that Davina is gorgeous and she takes my breath away the minute that she steps into a room, when she leaves I long for her and feel empty and when she speaks to me I feel that I can do anything so I was amazed when she agreed to marry me but now I'm waiting for something to end the fairytale and I will receive the life that I deserve; alone".

After Tom had finished speaking, the embarrassment continued to rise as it was unlike men to talk so openly about their feelings but somehow it seemed natural for Tom and Ryan to discuss their feelings with one another because it was almost as if they were brothers.

Ryan smiled back at Tom realising that the only thing he needed was reassurance because he was convinced that if Davina loved Tom as much as he loved her than it would take a lot more than nerves to prevent the pair of them from getting to the altar. However before Ryan was able to comment he was stunned by Tom's revelation, "can you call Davina and tell her the wedding isn't happening because I've cancelled it".

Ryan went over to the other side of the room and retrieved his mobile out of the travel bag which he had brought with him. _I hope that Tom knows what he is doing._


	68. Chapter 68

Part 68

Ryan looked at Tom astonished and to a certain extent angry; this anger was shown through the response to Tom, "No, I'm not doing it. If you want to cancel the wedding then phone Davina yourself and explain your reasons but I'm not doing it for you" Ryan's blue eyes pierced into Tom's and he used this as another form of indication that despite all the pleading and begging that Tom may resort to he was not backing down. However Tom seemed desperate therefore he replied, "Please Ryan, if you were my best friend you would do this for me". _Perhaps making him feel guilty will make him do it._

However this failed due to the stern reply that he received from Ryan, "No, I'm doing this because I'm your friend" Tom rolled his eyes signalling that he didn't agree however Ryan continued regardless, "what type of friend would I be if I let you lose the woman that you love and I know that she loves you too" This seemed to comfort Tom as he replied, "I'm just being silly aren't I" to which Ryan laughed, quickly nodded his head and then replied "definitely but if you don't want to marry Davina…I will" He said with a grin.

"No it's just nerves, I can't imagine anything I want more than marrying Davina" Tom replied and Ryan grinned back at him, as he knew that his best friend had made the correct decision.

"Somehow I thought that you would say that" Ryan laughed and he continued, "now, hurry up, we have to be at the church in a hour…well that's if you're still marrying her" Ryan asked needing to ensure that his friend was making the right decision and he was confident about it; _because I don't want the nerves to overcome him at the church and for him to do something stupid; which he would certainly lose Davina for._

"You bet I am" Tom replied as he ran up out of the lounge to retrieve his jacket from upstairs; with a massive smile on his face as the nerves had been transferred into excitement. When Tom was running up the stairs he called down to Ryan, "Will you please hurry up we have to leave in 5 minutes" to which Ryan looked at his watch. _Why would we have to get to the church 40 minutes before we had already planned to; which was an hour early anyway._

Davina turned to the woman in the room, "So how do you think that I look?" she asked nervously to which she received a massive smile from the other women in the room who had an immediate smile on their faces, the minute that they turned around to view the nervous woman.

"You look gorgeous and if Tom doesn't think so, then quite frankly he doesn't deserve to marry you" Holly replied to which the other women in the room agreed.

A woman who had remained silent so far lifted the half empty glass that she was holding and raised it to the air; "to Davina looking beautiful" on noticing that she was the only one in the room with a glass she drank some of the crimson liquid. _Ok there probably wasn't any need for that toast but the best thing about toasts are the drinking of alcohol in agreement….they are right; I am an alcoholic; it must be something to do with the school because there is me… umm…ah yes…Rose, Grantly and Matt. See it isn't just me and I was fine before I worked at Waterloo Road so perhaps I can get some compensation from the obvious stress that is caused from working at the school. _

The woman was pulled from her thoughts with the sight of Holly looking at her almost as if she was about to say something. In reality Holly was looking at her trying to remember how Davina had told her to remember the names of her Waterloo Road colleagues. _Well she has blonde hair and a glass of alcohol in her hand so that must mean that it is…_

"You are called Steph aren't you?" Holly asked her which left the blonde woman confused, "Yes how did you know that?" The other members saw Davina shaking her head pleading at Holly from over Steph's shoulder. It left the other members of staff concerned as they wondered how Davina would have told her to remember them.


	69. Chapter 69

Part 69

Tom was standing at the altar looking at his watch for the umpteenth time. _She has 5 minutes to get here but I don't know why I'm bothering to check my watch because_ _I knew it was too good to be true, as she obviously isn't going to come. But how long do I wait before I admit it to everybody else in the room…I feel so humiliated. I know one thing I'm going to have to leave Rochdale possibly England as I couldn't stand to see these people day after day with their pitying looks; all knowing that I was the person who was jilted at the altar._

Ryan who was standing beside his nervous friend smiled as he knew what he would be going through as Tom Clarkson had always been a worrier. _I hope I can say the right things to reassure him though because I'm not very good at these things but I'm convinced that she will come because I know how much they love one another. That was obvious at the barbeque which they attended together last summer at my house. _He prodded Tom in the arm to attract his attention, "what are you worried about, it's your wedding day and it's suppose to be the happiest day of you life" he said to which he received a dubious response.

"No today is the day when I turn into the male version of Miss Havisham" Tom replied showing his knowledge of the subject which he had spent his life teaching. Tom could tell that Ryan didn't understand due to the confused expression on his face therefore he decided to elaborate.

"Miss Havisham is a character in the novel "Great Expectations by Charles Dickens…I trust that you have heard of him?" Tom asked Ryan to which the pair of them laughed.

"Ok I might not have a knowledge of the English language like you, but I do know one of the greatest writers" Ryan replied; _the cheek of him, thinking that I wouldn't know who that was; just because he is an English teacher and I'm an accountant. Disgraceful. _However Ryan was pulled from his thoughts with the sound of Tom's voice as he continued in his explanation.

"And she was jilted on the day of her wedding so she effectively paused her life so she would never have to face up to the reality of being alone" Tom explained to which he saw a confused expression Ryan's face as the pair of them laughed due to the smile and nodding that Ryan was doing to give the impression that he understood.

"But you don't have to worry about that because I know that she is going to come" he replied to which Tom looked sceptical, "how do you know that?" he asked as he was intent on believing that she wasn't coming and he had prepared himself for a lonely life.

"Because your colleagues have come in looking excited so I presume that Davina is waiting outside" Tom looked to the door and saw Steph walking in. _Although she looks as though she is staggering, but surely not. _However Tom was interests were taken when she gestured to Tom with her thumbs up and then pointed outside.

Tom looked excitedly at Ryan, "She's outside, I'm getting married today" to which Ryan shook his hand and replied, "prepare to go under the thumb then, and I hope that you are aware that there will be no more football for you…still sure you want to marry her?" Ryan asked and Tom instantly replied, "Absolutely".

Davina walked down the aisle followed by Holly; who was Maid of Honour; as the pair of them walked down the aisle they both wore huge smiles as they were both delighted about the events that were going to unfold. Davina reached the altar and she turned to look at Tom. _I can't believe that today is actually happening it feels as though I have waited my whole life for today._

The fellow Waterloo Road staff were sitting on Tom's side of the church as there were less family members on his side that were attending the wedding however the staff filled the empty seats to leave the church decidedly full. The staff sat together in their friendship groups with Steph and Matt sitting next to one another; passing comment on the type of clothes that other people were wearing.

Steph nudged Matt and gestured to the woman in the hideous hat; "I would love to know who told her that looks good because it just doesn't". She whispered which caused a few of the other staff feeling the need to restrain laughter due to a fear of offending people that they weren't acquainted to.

Eddie leant towards Rachel; who rather begrudgingly had to sit next to him as there wasn't anyone else that she was able to say she was particularly close too and as she was so often around Eddie it would look suspicious that today was the day that she decided not to sit next to him. _I guess that I will have to make the best of it because I really don't want anyone else to know what happened between the pair of us._

"Who told these two that they were Trinny and Susannah?" Eddie whispered into Rachel's ear and the sensation of his warm breath on the side of her neck caused her breath to catch in the back of her throat when she tried to respond therefore all she could muster was a nod in agreement hoping that the conversation would be over quickly. _I know I will be making the situation more awkward as he has just made an effort but I don't know how to respond around him._

Eddie who was extremely confused and the lack of response from Rachel decided that it was probably better not to pursue the conversation further. _Although I saw the reaction that it provoked in Rachel when I was whispering in her ear and it certainly wasn't the reaction of someone who feels nothing for me._


	70. Chapter 70

Part 70

"I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride" the vicar declared which was greeted with a round of applause from the fellow people in the church.

At the reception; Matt and Steph were sitting in the corner, partaking in their favourite past-time; gossiping and people-watching. "Have you noticed that Rachel and Eddie haven't spoken to one another today although they do keep giving each other longing looks which the other one keeps missing? Why don't we watch the pair of them and see if we can find out any clues as to what has happened?" Steph suggested enthusiastically as she and Matt turned their attention to Rachel and Eddie; as they kept staring at one another before becoming aware that they may get caught and redirecting their gaze.

Steph and Matt laughed as they watched the situation. "I think there must have been some drama" Matt said as they both tried to rack their brains as to what could have happened between the pair which normally had an unbreakable partnership.

After many hours of posing for photos and having conversations with family members who required an invite but they had lost contact with; Tom and Davina were exhausted. "Don't worry we only have the reception and then we will be left in peace Mrs Clarkson" Tom said as Davina rested her head on Tom's shoulder trying to resist the tiredness that was threatening to overpower her.

"That reminds me, I thought that there is normally drama at weddings; a fight or something else, that makes these events interesting for the rest of us" Steph said which caused Matt to also look disappointed at the lack of memories that this wedding would provide them with. _Doesn't allow us much gossip does it? _However Matt's thoughts were interrupted with the flashback of a dream that he had the previous night. "Why didn't we see someone who stopped the wedding at the vital part because it normally happens in the movies" he said excitedly which caused Steph to look back at him in confusion, "well who would be the person to stop it?" _He really does come up with some silly ideas and then people wonder why I have to talk to Grantly and feign interest in horse racing._

"Well you" Matt mumbled as he ducked his head, as he revealed something that he knew his friend wouldn't approve of.

"Why would I want to stop the wedding, when they are suited to one another" Steph replied indignantly

"I was really nervous about marrying you" Davina said to Tom as she gazed into Tom's eyes; relieved that this time it was different to all the other times as this time she was Mrs. Clarkson. _And I'm incredibly pleased to be._

"It's funny you should say that because I was also nervous but now I'm delighted and this is the happiest that I have ever been." Tom replied as the pair of them shared another kiss, "Do you think that we could escape and leave them to it?" Davina asked with a smile however Tom begrudgingly had to decline, "sorry but I think it would be a bit obvious but as long as we are together I will permanently have a smile on my face because I love you and always will".

"I don't know it was a thought that I had last night" Matt explained and before Steph took further offence at his comment he said, "You are right though; they are well suited to one another" the pair of gossips turned their attention to Tom and Davina who were standing in the darkest corner of the room both obviously trying to avoid the conversation of others as they wanted to be left alone in each others company; tired of posing for photos and the catching up from distant family members which had only been invited to the wedding due to protocol.

"Hey Matt, I think we should leave them alone; it is obvious that they only want one another" Steph answered and a comfortable silence once more rested between the pair of them until involuntary both of their eyes fell upon Rachel and Eddie; who were still keeping out of each other's way.

"Tom and Davina aren't the only couple that are suited to one another in the room" Matt said and Steph commented in agreement.

"Actually I'm going to get those two together today, even if it is the last thing that I do especially as I will have to face the consequences of my actions" Steph started to stride away from Matt who stretched out his hands and placed them in a firm on the top of Steph's arms.

"Why what are you going to do?" Matt asked concerned for his friend as he valued her friendship too much to suffer the consequences alone.

"Wait and see" Steph exclaimed as she walked further away from Matt taking a deep breath preparing herself for what she was about to do.


	71. Chapter 71

Part 71

The party was in full swing when Steph managed to persuade the DJ to stop playing the music to enable her to say the speech; which she had quickly created when she left Matt. _I just hope that the plan works because if it doesn't I will look incredibly stupid._

"I know the best man has already made a speech; and I would like to add embarrassed Tom to a suitable degree however as a colleague of both of them I would like to give you all an insight into what it is like to work with them". Steph paused as her eyes found the best man who she had become intrigued with as the day progressed; _blonde hair, blue eyes and tall, he seems to be my and I'm convinced that throughout his speech he was having the same problem as his eyes were fixed upon mine. See I still have my female wiles about me although Rachel and Eddie doubted that Claude even existed._

_Yes I do still remember him but what I felt for him is nothing compared to what I feel for Ryan as I convinced that he feels the same way about me; unlike Claude; as the only other people who were near me was Liam; the school governor and Rachel; and she kept adverting her gaze from him so it was highly unlikely that he was looking at her because if he was surely you wouldn't look away. She must have been jealous that he was so obviously interested in me therefore she would have looked away because she was struggling to contain her jealously._

Steph realised that silence had descended upon the room in anticipation for her to speak. _Somehow I have to get them on side and I know the way how. _"Hello everybody, I'm not the most confident speaker" _The sympathy vote always works._ Steph paused due to the stifled laughter coming from the table which she had previously been sat on. _Well isn't it nice for colleagues to show some support._

"But I felt that I had to offer my congratulations to the happy couple as on behalf of the teachers of Waterloo Road we couldn't imagine anyone who would suit the pair of them more; and as a third party to their relationship; well considering the fact that at break and lunches they never take their hands off one another" Steph paused once more as everyone turned to look at Tom and Davina particularly as Davina was going red from embarrassment.

"I hope that you two are very happy together. Tom and Davina!" Steph called and raised her glass as the other people in the room copied.

"Not to steal the limelight but I have one other announcement" Steph said which caused Matt to look excited; _I wonder what it could be although I'm a little concerned that I haven't already heard about it because I did think that I was her best friend however I'm sure that it will be brilliant._

Steph paused as she wondered whether what she was about to do was the best idea as she knew two people in the room wouldn't be best pleased with her. _But then I believe that it is worth the risk because Waterloo Road isn't the only school in England is it?_

The other people in the room looked at Steph in amazement; _I wonder what her announcement could be? _Steph looked around the room and Matt seemed to have remembered what this was probably going to be about therefore he gave Steph the thumbs up almost as if he was trying to tell her that he would support her.

"I know that weddings are normally happy occasions and this wedding is no exception as two of our friends have got married however this announcement isn't particularly very happy but I think that as friends you deserve to know; therefore I make an apology in dampening the atmosphere but…" Steph paused as she realised that she was waffling and this fear was increased with Matt gesturing with his hands to get one with it. _Although it's easier for him because he isn't risking his career but surely they couldn't dismiss me due to a personal issue could they?_

"Well it isn't actually my announcement but I know about it so I think that the person isn't going to tell you so I have taken it upon myself to tell you; unless the person will decide to tell you themselves". Steph spoke and looked and Rachel whose eyes had connected with Eddie's. _Well at least they aren't ignoring one another anymore so this has obviously worked a little bit and we all know what a knight Eddie likes to be so I'm sure that he will race to Rachel's defence if the questions become intense._

The next thing that Steph knew was Rachel making her way to the microphone preparing to disclose something that Rachel wanted to be hidden for a more substantial length of time. The rest of the people in the room looked perplexed; _why would Steph know something about Rachel because you can't say that the pair of them are overly close therefore I can't believe that they had a heart-to-heart anyway I doubt that would ever happen again especially as Steph is making Rachel disclose it to everyone._

"Thanks Steph" Rachel muttered sarcastically however the microphone picked it up and announced it to the rest of the room

Steph smiled back angelically at her and walked down off the stage leaving the rest of the people in the room confused; as to how Steph would know something that concerned Rachel and the way that they had pressured someone who was normally so independent into doing something against her will.

Rachel looked nervously around the room and wanted nothing more than Eddie to stand on the stage next to her and telling her that everything would be 'fine' something that was definitely his trademark saying; particularly to Rachel as he had already publicly exclaimed that she was a natural worrier.

_But come on Rachel, you can do this after all you address a whole room of teenagers every week in assembly, I'm sure I can address the staff especially when I will only have to see them for another five days and then I can leave not needing to think about any of them or seeing any of them. Ok maybe it will be harder to not think about some of them but that is something that I will have to face when I have already left._

"Thanks to Steph, I'm going to announce something that I was going to leave until Thursday in assembly but then I suppose it is only right that you as staff hear it first". The tears started to glisten in her eyes and although she was finding the prospect of leaving her pillar of strength behind she had to search for him among the crowds as she knew that he would give her the reassurance that she needed. Once located, Rachel felt as though she had enough strength to continue therefore she took a deep breath and once again started to explain.

"Friday is…." Rachel paused finding it harder than she had initially expected too. _Come on Rachel you can do this you have overcome bigger things than this before._

"Friday is my last day as head teacher at Waterloo Road as from Monday the school will have employed a new head". Rachel spoke quickly so that it resulted in silence followed by the crowd murmuring as they didn't understand the reasoning behind the decision.


	72. Chapter 72

Part 72

The staff looked at one another as if they tried to comprehend what Rachel had just told them and from looking at the expression on one another faces they all knew they had the same reaction to this news; anger. Not at the way that Rachel had left it so long to tell them but the way that Rachel was getting replaced which was to them unthinkable because of the sacrifices that she had made for the school and the improvements that she made to it which had made a significant change in all of their lives.

The staff looked at Tom trying to persuade him to ask the question which they all knew required answering, begrudgingly he complied and asked, "But why, you are the best thing that ever happened to the school. I don't know about anyone else but you changed the school from a job to somewhere where I wanted to go; I knew that I could make a difference because I had support from the top; you".

The other staff voiced their approval at what Tom said however rather than helping Rachel this made it harder for her to leave and the tears were starting to make tracks down Rachel's face. Eddie who until now remained silent wanted nothing more than to walk up to the stage and declare his love publicly for her almost hoping that a public confession would prove it further however Eddie knew Rachel too well to know that she wouldn't appreciate this.

Rachel looked around the room for the first time allowing her eyes to leave Eddie's almost as if it was too hard to admit that this was one of the last times that they would be able to be like this. "No Tom, you don't need me you are all brilliant teachers and have been incredible to work with for the last couple of years however it is time for me to move on" Rachel replied to Tom's question with an intent to leave the stage quickly and fade into the background of the party somewhere where she was comfortable; allowing the likes of Steph Haydock and Matt to take the centre stage. However the staff weren't prepared to let the questions stop there which resulted in the normally quiet but enormously loyal Jasmine to speak up, "But what are you going to do, because the governors won't be able just to replace you".

"Well I'm sorry but they have as they have decided that I have come to the end of my time at Waterloo Road and in response to your other question, I don't quite know what I'm going to do" Rachel responded once more trying to exit the stage however Jasmine hadn't quite finished the inquisition yet.

"But you are staying in teaching aren't you?" she asked hoping that one day Rachel would return to the school and the enjoyment which would be lost within her departure would return, however the reply that she received showed that in no uncertain terms this wasn't going to happen.

"No I'm not" Rachel replied and looked down to the floor now wishing that Eddie would once again act her knight in shining amour and deflect the questions which proved hurtful to Rachel. _But that is something else that I have forgo when I leave._

"But what are you going to do?" Jasmine asked knowing that she was grilling Rachel but in her opinion this was one of the worst decisions that the school governors had ever made. _And truth be told they had made some bad decisions._

"To be totally honest I don't know but I will probably go travelling and see all the places which I have always wanted to visit and possibly l will live there if I find somewhere suitable".

It was now that Steph remembered the purpose of exposing Rachel's secret; _as at the moment it hasn't served its purpose as Eddie seems to have given up the knight in shining armour routine for Rachel; typical man, never knows when to act upon his feelings so I will have to give him a further shove in the right direction._

"But surely travelling isn't a trip to do alone?" Steph asked trying to ignite a relationship between Rachel and Eddie.

Rachel stared back at Steph unable to believe the audacity of the woman, "Why there are some lovely cities out there" Rachel replied with a smile almost as if Rachel had seen through Steph's questions.

"Anyway can we please remember that this is Tom and Davina's reception therefore these questions can wait as I want to celebrate the wedding of two of my friends" Rachel knew that had sounded harsh but it was the only way to stop the questioning before she broke down in tears and she was finding it hard to convince them that Rachel was excited in the next chapter of her life; _life after Waterloo Road._

Rachel stepped from the stage and immediately the DJ replaced the eerie silence with the sound of music which now sounded deafening to the deflated people in the room.

She had managed to slip into the darkest corner of the room completely undetected; or so she thought.

The truth was the staff were all trying to encourage one another to talk to Rachel about her impending departure as normally they would send Eddie but it was apparent that the two of them had, had a disagreement.

A man stood next to Rachel and despite the darkness of the room, Rachel knew exactly who it was.

"So you don't want to leave then because I was under the impression that it was your decision" he asked almost as if he had to clarify something.


	73. Chapter 73

Part 73

Rachel looked at him confused, "Well it is sort of but Ralph made it clear that I either resigned or I was sacked as the governors had lost their confidence in me" Rachel replied looking at Liam extremely confused;_ why does it seem as though he didn't actually want me to leave?_

"What!" he exclaimed as if he couldn't believe what he had been told; _why would Ralph have said this when it blatantly isn't true but what can I do although I know that the other governors don't want Rachel to leave, she may have prepared herself although I'm going to try my best to stop her._

Before Rachel was able to reply, Liam continued with his comment, "I don't understand why Ralph would have told you something that isn't true because the governors haven't lost confidence in you we wanted to assure you that although there may have been increasing pressure following the Earl Kelly incident we were supporting you because no-one is able to deny the massive impact that you have had on the school and the surrounding community.

Rachel was finding it hard to take in; _so what is he saying that he doesn't want me to leave and if he is what does that mean for me. I don't mind what happens to me because I will survive; I always do eventually however I want a reassurance that the school will be in safe hands; whether that is mine or someone else._

"So Rachel, do you want to leave?" he asked almost as if he believed that it was a straight forward decision for her. Rachel looked at him puzzled; _surely it isn't that easy to make such a massive decision like that. I want to stay but I have already resigned myself to the fact that I am leaving._

"Of course, I don't want to leave, I never wanted to leave but it's not that easy" Rachel replied with the tears starting to glisten in her eyes once more as her believe that she would have to leave wasn't correct and here she was being presented with the option to stay.

"Isn't it?" Liam asked not totally understanding why Rachel was finding it so hard to agree to stay. _As a school we want her to stay, the staff want her to stay and so does she so why is she making the decision seem as though it is so challenging when it isn't. Perhaps I could get Eddie to have a word with her as she normally listens to what he says._

"I don't know" Rachel replied as there were lots of ideas racing through her head as she was starting to realise that her leaving the school was the right decision as people would be safer without her. Before Liam was able to comment, Rachel continued, "can I think about it for a bit?" she asked to which he nodded reluctantly as he was hoping that she would immediately agree.

Liam left Rachel standing in the corner with many ideas racing through her head. _I could stay as I have enjoyed my time at the school but I don't know whether this is a omen almost as if I should leave perhaps I can talk to Eddie and see what he thinks although I'm sure we know what he is going to say as he has been trying to convince me to stay the entire time._

Rachel looked around the room for Eddie and saw him standing at the bar next to the woman who was Davina's friend. _I think her name is Holly._

Rachel couldn't stop the jealousy that ran through her when she saw Holly and Eddie standing close to one another almost as if they were taking an interest in one another. _But why should I care, don't like Eddie do I? He is only a friend isn't he?_


	74. Chapter 74

Part 74

Rachel knew Eddie was more than a friend when she felt the anger rush view her veins with the sight of the pair of them laughing at something Eddie had said; _that should be me, but I gave that right away when I rejected him. How stupid was I. I suppose it is only right that he wants to move on but I wish that I didn't have to witness it because I never knew that it would hurt this much._

Rachel wasn't the only one to witness the blossoming relationship between Eddie and Holly, as Davina had witnessed the interaction between the pair of them but she also saw the hurt expression on Rachel's face. _Great what is Holly doing now? Admittedly the pair of them make a nice couple but I know that Eddie's heart will always belong to Rachel therefore it isn't fair that Holly should start a relationship with someone who wouldn't feel the same way about her as she would him although as I know Eddie he would try and convince himself that he did._

"Sorry Tom, I've got to go and stop Holly making a massive mistake and can you do me a favour and you keep an eye on Ryan because he seems to have developed quite a fascination with Rachel" Davina explained to which Tom looked totally confused; _how does she know all of this. I swear that woman have a sixth sense; mind-reading. But he has good taste in being interested in Rachel because I think that the pair of them would be well suited at least I know that he would look after her._

"How do you know?" he asked complete baffled by the way that his wife could tell so much about other people by just looking at them.

"Sorry can't say, it is a state secret but please go and stop Tom getting close to Rachel and I don't want to hear your views that you think that the pair of them would make a nice couple" Davina smirked as she knew that this thought would have once crossed his mind.

Tom tried to feign his ignorance, "I wasn't thinking that" to which Davina smiled, "remember I know".

Davina walked towards Holly which left Tom standing there incredibly confused and with the realisation that there wasn't going to be any secrets between the pair of them because she would be able to figure it out before he told her.

Davina walked towards Holly as Eddie had gone to the bar to buy drinks for the pair of them. "Holly can I have a word please?" Davina asked her friend knowing that this conversation may be very awkward for the pair of them.

"Yeah sure, what can I do for you?" Holly asked and she seemed to be in an incredibly good mood. _I'm afraid that the good mood may evaporate with the news of what she was going to hear._

"I don't want to speak out of turn but it's just that the man you are currently talking too is sort of the boyfriend of the head teacher" Davina said and when she was saying it she knew that Holly was very embarrassed.

"I'm so sorry I had better go and apologise to him, I'm sorry to you as I hope that I haven't caused any trouble for you" before Davina was able to comment, Holly had rushed over to Eddie who was about to order their drinks, "I'm sorry, I didn't know and I hope that I haven't caused trouble for you".

Eddie stared back at her confused. _Great I must be such a terrible person it results in two people rejecting me, it makes me wonder why I have any friends if I'm so dreadful._

Eddie glanced around the room at the people who he liked to consider his friends; reserving an extended look for Rachel, but also noticing that he wasn't the only one who was giving Rachel such attention. _No wonder she rejected me as I'm not worthy of having Rachel's interest as she could do so much better than me._

Eddie redirected his gaze to the barman who was asking for the order; _I guess that I will be standing here alone but then as long as Rachel is happy I will be for her because she deserves to be happy. I just hope that he looks after her and treats her properly; something that Rachel definitely deserves._

Rachel was relieved that Holly had left Eddie's side but couldn't help but notice the miserable expression on Eddie's face. _I wish he would look happier because he gives me confidence as he is normally happy. Perhaps I should go to him and see what has caused the dramatic change in happiness because although I rejected him I still care for him because I would like to consider that he is my best friend as I can tell him everything._

Rachel walked to the man in question; "Liam, I've made my decision".


	75. Chapter 75

Part 75

_Ok that wasn't the easiest thing to do but at least I can try and sort everything out before I leave this evening. _Rachel left Liam; refusing his offer to buy her a drink as she knew that she had to try and solve Eddie's problem. _Although that may determine whether he trusts me enough to tell me because I'm not quite sure what me leaving may have done to our relationship. This would be terrible, when you consider that it just to be a friendship, which I felt safe in._

"Eddie can I have a word please?" Rachel asked to Eddie whose mood hadn't been improved much following Rachel's arrival at his side which was unusual because that normally always brought a smile to his face. Eddie immediately looked unimpressed partly because he was still being bitter that Rachel was leaving although he had specifically asked her not to leave.

_Why ask, its not as though I can say no is it, although I would like to because I will have to be able to manage without Rachel being here next week. Actually I am going to say no._

"No, I'm busy and I'm sure that you have other people who would appreciate your attention more than me" Eddie replied in a harsh tone which resulted in tears starting to glisten in Rachel's eyes for the second time in the evening.

"Ok" Rachel turned away feeling humiliated by Eddie; now knowing that the friendship that the pair of them used to have was now lost and with further comments like that it was going to be irreparable. A sudden wave of guilt surrounded Eddie; I shouldn't have said that because after all she has done for me by getting me Michael back, I should treat her with more respect than that.

"Rachel" Eddie called as he stretched his arm out and held onto Rachel's wrist to prevent her from walking away from him and turning her back on the relationship which Eddie had just partly destroyed; and if I have I will never forgive myself.

The tears were running down Rachel's face as the emotional scars that Eddie had just caused her to feel was evident in the physical reaction.

"What do you want Eddie, I understand that you don't want anything to do with me but there is something that you need to know" Rachel replied as Eddie tried to reach out and use his thumb to wipe the tears that were falling however she dodged his attempt preferring to wipe them away herself; furious that she had allowed Eddie to see the pain that he had caused her to feel.

"No Rachel you don't understand, I'm being stupid as usual". Eddie tried to explain however it was obvious due to Rachel's persona that she didn't want to listen to any explanations that she may give. So what can I do how can I show her that for the next week I will be right beside her because although I don't agree with her decision to leave it might mean that the pair of us could start a proper relationship so I won't totally lose Rachel.

Realising that actions would perhaps serve his purpose better than words he stretched his arms out so once more they were rested upon Rachel's shoulders and he gently pulled Rachel closer to him he was expecting her to pull away and resist his attempts to comfort her but instead she rested her head on his chest listening to his heart beating and taking comfort from she

The other staff in the room watched with interest and the blossoming relationship between the two most senior members of staff as they were all pleased that they were able to offer happiness in one another's lives; something which their friends all acknowledged that they deserved.

The pair of them pulled away from the embrace instantly lacking and searching for the comfort that it provided; standing in the arms of the person that they secretly loved both knowing that the relationship would offer the pair of them so much but it required them both taking a massive risk in pursuing it but almost believing that it was worth the risk.

"I'm sorry Rachel, I didn't mean it, I'm just jealous of you and Ryan" Eddie admitted with the embarrassment being apparent in both his voice and his body language, which resulted in Rachel looking back in his eyes confused; "what do you mean nothing is going on between me and Ryan if anything you and Holly looked rather cosy earlier" Rachel responded which caused Eddie's lips to curve upwards and immediately he had a thought.

"So were you jealous then Rachel?" Eddie asked with a smirk of his face using the close proximity between the pair of them to his advantage as he looked down in Rachel's eyes trying to resist the urge to tell her that he loved her and that he always had. Although I have a feeling that she feels the same way as me although I'm pretty sure that she won't admit it perhaps I need to offer her some encouragement.

"No of course I wasn't jealous" Rachel insisted trying to avoid Eddie's eye contact which was hard due to the short distance between the pair of them and the way that he was slightly taller than her.

"Are you sure about that Miss Mason because you sounded jealous and you looked jealous but you weren't?" Eddie asked which caused Rachel to smile because she knew that she had been caught out; he always did know my feelings…actually he sounded jealous as well so lets turn the question around.

"Well were you jealous?" Rachel asked with a smile on her face knowing that she still hadn't answered Eddie's question but what she didn't expect was the answer that her question got greeted with, "yes because I wanted it to be me".

"Jasmine do you know where Grantly is?" Steph asked as she was determined to ensure that he had seen the recent developments between Rachel and Eddie; because I'm not having him claim that this hasn't happened because the rest of the staff have won the bet and I will be happy to receive the pay out because I am running out of money as I'm miscalculated the cost of the bottle of wine this morning so I'm severely short of money and I can't really wait a fortnight until the monthly wage comes.

"I think he is outside" Jasmine replied which resulted in Steph's face instantly dropping; well I will change that because he has to see this. I knew that this bet was one that was going to pay off.

"Rachel I have something to tell you" Eddie started and immediately Rachel opened her eye, lifted her head off Eddie's chest and looked him straight in the eye. I wonder what it is?

"What is it Eddie?" Rachel asked with a panic expression on her face as she was starting to accept the idea that the two of them would be able to work at a relationship. I know it is unprofessional but I think it could work between the two of us and if it doesn't then it isn't as though it will have caused any problem because I don't see why we couldn't go back to being friends.

"Well although you are leaving…"Eddie was interrupted by Rachel saying, "I'm not". This left a confused expression on Eddie's face.

"What do you mean?" he asked and Rachel replied with a smile, "I'm not leaving because it appears that only Ralph wanted me to leave rather than any of the other governors".

Eddie grinned back at Rachel as he knew that he would have no reason why the relationship between the pair of them wouldn't work but before he was able to respond Rachel had already started speaking again, "although things do have to change as I don't want things to stay the way they are".

Eddie looked even more confused, "what are you saying Rachel?" he asked with hurt shown clearly in his voice as he knew that it may end his hopes of having a relationship with Rachel.

"I'm not happy with the relationship that we have" Rachel replied which caused Eddie to look even more hurt. That's not exactly true because the problem is the fact that we haven't got a relationship. However Eddie didn't know the reasoning behind this comment therefore he replied, "Oh".

Rachel smiled knowing that the confusion was the reasoning behind such an answer, "don't worry about it's not as bad as you think" Eddie looked at her bewildered; that's easy for you to say.

"Look Eddie, the worst thing when I was leaving was…" Rachel paused feeling embarrassed at the possible rejection from Eddie.

The hurt expression on Eddie's face made Rachel continue, "the worst bit about leaving the school was the prospect of leaving you" Rachel ducked her head in embarrassment but was only encouraged by Eddie's response.

"well that's what I wanted to tell you, Rachel I love you",

"Oh Eddie I love you too" Rachel replied with a smile on her face as she wrapped her arms around Eddie's neck and their heads moved closer as they shared the kiss that they longed for.


	76. Chapter 76

Part 76

Rachel and Eddie pulled away from the kiss and Eddie couldn't disguise the cheeky smile which was fixed upon his face as he couldn't quite believe that after waiting an entire year he had finally admitted his true feelings for Rachel. She had let him behind the barriers which had rebuffed any previous attempts to get close to her.

Eddie was immediately concerned that once again Rachel would try to deny their feelings for one another so reluctantly Eddie slowly started to raise his eyes from the floor as he was trying to prepare for the heartbreak that he would suffer when Rachel exclaimed that the relationship between the pair of them wouldn't work but at the same time denying the opportunity to let it flourish into something that was worthwhile and would last for the pair of them; providing two independent people with the united strength to pick themselves up from their mistakes; which they would be beating themselves up about.

"It looks as though we aren't the only happy couple in the room" Davina said as she wrapped her arms around Tom pleased that she didn't have to continue the countdown for the wedding any longer because the day had happened and they were already married. Perhaps I had better tell Tom that I actually took part in the bet because I don't want to have secrets between the pair of us and it might be better to tell him now rather than him finding out later on.

Before Tom was able to reply the door swung open and in walked the other students that had been invited to the reception partly to keep Chlo and Donte company and enabling Mika to see what was going on in the school. Tom smiled at the way a pregnant Chlo and Donte were immediately surrounded by their fellow students showing how popular the pair of them were. I can't help but feel that I have done a good job on the pair of them and I'm convinced that Izzie would be proud of them. I know that it might seem strange to be thinking of Izzie on my wedding day but I can't help but question whether she approves of every decision that I make however I think that she would like the decisions that I have taken recently because I'm sure that she would like Davina and as we make each other happy I know that she would be pleased for me. As Davina treats Chlo and Mika as her own I know that Izzie would approve because she just wants the best for those two girls and although we hadn't had the easiest ride I know that everything will be sorted out in the end.

Rachel was concerned at the lack of speed that Eddie was showing to meet her eyes. Maybe he is embarrassed about my past, maybe he is hoping and believing that due to my past he should be getting more than a kiss as once a prostitute, always a prostitute. My past involved strangers and it's not as though Eddie is a stranger.

The tears started to glisten in Rachel's eyes; I never thought that Eddie was like that, I never thought that he saw me as a prostitute anymore but maybe I was wrong…maybe I was wrong to believe that I could be anything else.

It didn't take long for the pupils gaze to be directed towards the fellow teachers in the room trying to spot any embarrassing situations which they would be able to use to their advantage later in the year either to try and avoid homework or an internal exam which they believed was unnecessary; most likely because they hadn't been revising for it as they had always found something better and more 'important' to do.

"Do you think Mason and Lawson have finally told each other how they feel?" Brett asked the group of friends that he had recently joined with Mika.

The other pupils stopped looking directly at Grantly and turned their attention to Rachel and Eddie who were still standing in each other's company; they were too close to be just friends but at the same time they weren't exactly fully committed to the relationship that the pair of them may have been about to undertake.


	77. Chapter 77

Part 77

The slow process that Eddie had been undertaking was over and although he was delaying it for as long as possible; trying to commit the memory of kissing Rachel to his mind; trying to imprint it in his head so that it was the last thing that he thought of before he went to sleep, it was what he dreamt of when he was sleeping and it was the first thing that he thought of when he woke up. Because I'm pretty sure that it will only be a memory as why would anyone who is as amazing as Rachel want to be with a prat like me? However Eddie had delayed it for as long as was physically possible and despite the burning desire to stop Rachel telling him that she didn't feel the same way he knew that he owned the relationship the chance to run its course and have its place in the limelight. Something that it had threatened but knowing that it would never be the centre of attention despite the fact that the prospect of a relationship with Rachel was what gave Eddie the strength to live and the prospect of seeing Rachel in a morning gave him his oxygen to breathe.

"It looks like it but Lawson better not hurt her or he will have me to answer to innit" Bolton replied getting sudden protective over the head mistress in front of him who had been his protector throughout many occasions within the last year. When I get good marks in the exams it will be down to her because she is the one that told me that I was able to change and she gave me the confidence to believe in myself. She made me happy as I know that I can achieve anything that I put my mind to so I hope that Lawson makes her happy because she definitely deserves it.

"Aww it sounds as though you are getting dead protective Bolton" Janeece replied with a smile on her face at the sight of Bolton stating his respect for the teacher that they had all grown to love and respect. To think that we were all annoyed when Mr. Rimmer had to leave but now it seems as though it was good for the school as it enabled Mason to come and she has really changed all our lives due to the way that she believes in all of us.

Confusion was etched over Rachel's face when Eddie eyes eventually met hers. Why does he look so happy surely he should be annoyed but he looks delighted? I really don't understand this man…should I try and understand him more by being with him or should I claim that I have no feelings for him…well I can hardly do that because I have already told him that I love him so I would be a bit contradicting if I now claim that I don't. But Eddie is a good man and he can do so much better than going out with an ex-prostitute something that I will never be able to alter because it is something that I will always be.

The other people in the room were unaware of the sudden dilemma that the pair were facing as the majority of them were rejoicing in the knowledge that the pair of them had won them some money; mainly from Grantly. I knew that I would always win money on this bet perhaps I should find Matt to ensure that he knows the recent developments. Although I had probably better get photographic evidence hadn't I? Because I wouldn't like Grantly to claim that it never happened. Steph removed her phone from her handbag and snapped a photo of the pair of them with Eddie's arms still encircled around Rachel's waist. I do love the person who invented a camera on the phone as I would never have been able to get this proof without it.

"Rachel?" Eddie asked as he noticed that Rachel was avoiding his eye-contact and he knew that she would be feeling embarrassed when she noticed that the rest of the people in the room had their eyes fixed upon the pair of them. Why can't other people mind their own business because what difference does it make to them? Anyone would think that they have taken a bet on it…actually they probably have but I don't think that I will tell Rachel that.

Slowly Rachel raised her head to meet with Eddie's; this is where he will embarrass me now. However Rachel was surprised to look in Eddie's eyes and be met with an expression of love and concern. I guess that I'm not the easiest woman to understand perhaps he can do so much better than me and if I have a relationship with him I will only be holding him back.

Matt returned to the room dragging an extremely reluctant Grantly by his sleeve. Great they had to decide that after a year of dancing around one another and their feelings they had to decide that this would be the day where they would admit their feelings. I'm tempted to make them pay as if they could deny their feelings until they were alone no-body would be ever the wiser. But then she is a former-prostitute; well I say former I don't actually know that is true as she could still be doing it to tide her over when the pay packet seems a bit lighter; although she is a head teacher so it's not as though she has the same measly wage as the actually teachers in the school as all she can do is practice her signature on a few pieces of paper and then sit there drinking coffee which has been made for her by the secretary.

"Look Grantly it seems as though you are going to have to pay money to the rest of us because the pair of them have finally admitted their feelings to one another" Matt said with a beaming smile on his face while he exchanged a childish high-five with Steph as the pair seemed to be sharing a joke which wasn't disclosed to the rest of them.

Grantly looked at the pair of them and shook his head which caused the highly excitable pair to laugh out loud and through the laughter Steph said, "You are only jealous that you didn't join the TTG as if you had you would have been able to celebrate this with us but you decided that you didn't want to therefore you can't appreciate the reduced rates that may have been accepted". Matt looked at her horrified and whispered, "Who said anything about reduced payment?" To which Steph laughed again and whispered back, "no-body but I'm trying to make Grantly regret calling it a stupid idea because it seemed to have worked with Rachel and Eddie".

The other staff looked at them confused, "what is TTG?" to which they all shrugged believing that Steph made more sense when she was drunk than when she was sober. To think that we allow her to teach the people who will shape the country that we live in. What a terrible thought!


	78. Chapter 78

Part 78

"Davina I have something to tell you, I'm sorry I should have told you before but I was embarrassed however I think that you deserve to know" Tom said as he gazed down into Davina's eyes as she removed her head from his chest as soon as he started speaking. I wonder what it is that he has got to tell me however hopefully it means that I will be able to tell him my secret as well.

"Ok" Davina replied ominously as she was unsure as to what Tom would be telling her as she didn't know whether it would affect the relationship which the pair had fully committed too. I hope that she doesn't think that it is too bad but surely she can't be too annoyed at it because it has worked in the end and although she said that it was unfair; it's not as though the pair of them know. And what they don't know can't hurt them.

"Eddie do you think that this is a good idea?" Rachel asked nervously dreading the possible answer that he would provide as she was giving Eddie an escape route hoping that if further along the relationship he wanted to pull out of the relationship Rachel would have been relieved that the pair of them entered both craving it as much as the other one. I know that the relationship won't automatically solve all of my problems because there are still a lot of things that I have to fight on my own but I hope that Eddie will always be beside me to pick up the broken pieces of me when the reality of the situation has taken hold and my defences have crumbled.

Eddie looked deep into Rachel's brown eyes; partly because he loved the opportunity to get attracted to them as they showed Eddie everything that he loved about Rachel; her spirit, determination and love. I just wish she could see herself the way that I see her because she would never have to doubt herself again as I hope that I will be able to provide Rachel with the support that she needs although she will obviously maintain the pretence that she doesn't require any help and I will need to break through the barriers that surround her heart to get into a position where I will be able to help her. But I promise you one thing I will never stop trying as I will never admit that Rachel isn't the person for me because I know that she is.

"Rachel I don't think that it is a good idea…" before Eddie was able to continue Rachel had pulled herself further from his embrace now wishing that she had kept the barriers strong around her heart.

Rachel tried to try herself away from Eddie wishing that her expression didn't show the hurt that she was feeling due to the sharp impact of Eddie's comment. I guess that Eddie is the same as everyone else and the stupid thing is I thought that he was different; just shows that I can't judge characters as well as I thought that I could.

"So then do we want to place bets on whether the relationship will work?" Steph asked the group of staff which had now surrounded her and Matt due to sharing their delight at the money that they would receive from Grantly. The other staff umm faced a dilemma whether it was fair to gain more money from the pair of them or whether they should quit while they were ahead.

"Well I'm in but how are we going to do it?" Matt asked as he was sure that TTG team would win and they had promised that they would half any of the profits that they won. Therefore surely we have a higher chance to win as we have a bigger percentage of winning.

"Well we would all suggest a time frame where we believe the relationship might end" Steph replied and was starting to smirk due to the look of interest on the faces of the people around her. It seems as though their love for money has taken over their views on whether it is fair or not.

However a cynical Jasmine replied, "How will we know when the relationship is over because I doubt that they are going to tell us?" This comment resulted in other people agreeing with her and voicing her concerns. Grantly nodded in agreement, "yes I agree with Jasmine, how will we know".

Steph gasped which caused the other staff to look at her confused and Matt looked at her concerned, "Steph are you alright?" to which Steph smiled at her caring friend and replied " yes but can you get me a chair because I might need to sit down as Grantly has actually agreed with what Jasmine has said".

"Very funny Stephanie" Grantly replied totally unimpressed.


	79. Chapter 79

Part 79

"I know that we said we wouldn't get involved but I suppose I got roped in by them…I wish that I hadn't because now I feel incredibly guilty and I wish that I hadn't because I have been keeping the only secret from you in this relationship". Tom started to explain and with Tom's last comment Davina felt her stomach sink. Great now he thinks that I'm all innocent as I haven't kept any secrets and I guarantee that his secret can't be worse than mine because I'm the one that promised that I would tell him everything, and I did something that we both agreed that we wouldn't do.

Davina sensed that Tom needed reassurance therefore she took Tom's hands within her own to try and give him the confidence that she felt he needed to enable him to continue in his confession. I just hope that he will give me confidence when I confess my secret to him.

"Well you must admit that it is isn't often that the pair of you see eye-to-eye…well apart from when you kissed at the Christmas party anyway" Steph mumbled the last part quieter however every member of the group still heard it and it resulted in the pair that it involved to blush rather heavily both not wishing to be remembered of the incident which often brought amusement to the other people. "Oh and can you stop calling me Stephanie because it is Steph or I will have to start calling you John" Steph replied which seemed to have been lost on the rest of them judging on the confused expression on the rest of their faces.

Steph felt that she had to elaborate, "After the racing commentator, John McCrirrick, as I think after all the reading of the racing paper, Grantly should be in a position to replace him" Steph said and the other staff laughed at the joke which was said purely in revenge from Steph.

Grantly looked unimpressed again, "I don't read the racing paper that much but by the way Steph it is called the Racing Post" his response showed that he was either very niave or that he had been hurt by Steph's comment and sort revenge similarly to Steph's however he didn't realise that this comment only served to support what Steph had been saying.

"Eddie can you let me go please" Rachel asked as she was feeling embarrassed at the way that she had lowered her barriers; only for Eddie to aid in their construction again.

"No Rachel, I not going to ever let you go because I don't think that it is a good idea that we are together because I know that it is a good idea because I know I love you and there is no point in me getting up without knowing that I would see you in the day" Eddie explained and the tears were starting to glisten at the end of Eddie's speech in Rachel's eyes.

"Oh Eddie I love you too" Rachel replied which caused the pair of them to smile at one another as they had just declared their love for one another.

"Just one thing Eddie; I haven't been in a relationship for a long time therefore could we take this slowly because I want it to work between us because I know that the only way I have survived these last few months has been because I have had you to support me". Rachel explained and the pair of them had taken one another hands and Eddie gave her small hand a comforting squeeze within his own.

"Rachel, we will do this at your speed, I promise…I just can't believe that someone as amazing as you would want someone like me" Eddie replied which caused Eddie to smile; not only due to his words but the expression which Eddie used which reflected the love that he had for her.

"I have to disagree with that, because I think you are the amazing one" Rachel replied which caused Eddie to smile at her.

"Then Mason, I think we are going to have to disagree with each other on that one" Eddie replied as his eyes flickered down to Rachel's lips as hers repeated the action towards his.

Eager to break up the heated discussion between the pair of them, Jasmine reiterated her question trying to be as diplomatic as she felt that she was able to be particularly as it involved someone else moaning at Grantly; something that Jasmine felt she did a lot during a week within her fellow teachers company. I probably wouldn't have bothered if it wasn't Davina's and Tom's wedding because he deserves to have people criticising him but I just wish that they wouldn't continue to use the incident which is supposed to have happened at the Christmas party. I can't believe how much alcohol I must have drank as can't imagine wanting to kiss Grantly and whenever I do I feel sick.

"So then how are we going to know if the relationship has ended?" Jasmine asked as she directed her question towards Steph which resulted in the blonde woman to forget her conflict with Grantly and focus upon the money-making scheme in hand.

"Well perhaps one of us could befriend Rachel" Steph suggested while looking directly at Jasmine hoping that she would accept the challenge that was being set for her.

Unfortunately for Steph and the group of teachers, Jasmine was determined that she wasn't going to accept, "no way, I'm not doing that Rachel would be suspicious as we haven't got anything in common and why do you think she would tell me anyway" the other teachers reluctantly agreed knowing that Jasmine would fail to ask the questions that were divulging and imposing upon Rachel's private life.

"Come on, you can tell me because it can't be that bad" Davina said as she looked deep into Tom's eyes trying to convince him that she would always love him despite the revealing of the impending secret.

I wouldn't be so sure about that but I had better tell her I just hope that she doesn't resent me too much for doing something that I promised we wouldn't.

"You know the bet that the staff had on whether Rachel or Eddie would start a relationship" Tom starting to explain and the pained expression on Davina's face due to the belief that Tom may have rumbled her secret and he was trying to tell her that he knew.

However it was apparent that Tom didn't know anything about Davina's involvement as he continued in his confession, "well Steph kept pestering me and I guess I must have cracked as I realised that the only way that she would leave me alone would be if I joined in with the bet". Tom ducked his head in embarrassment as he couldn't face looking at Davina knowing that he had broken a promise.

"Tom look at me" Davina said as she placed her hand under Tom's chin forcing him to meet his eyes with her. Tom was confused by the expression on her face he had expected her to be annoyed but actually she seemed relieved; but why?

"It seems as though you aren't the only one then because they also roped me in" Davina replied with a smile as she was relieved that she had told him something that she had wanted to tell him for ages. Tom looked back at her relieved; it seems as though I wasn't the only one then; I hope she knows how much I love her.

"Davina I love you so much; I'm so pleased that I married you as you are amazing and I can't imagine my life without you in it". Tom said to which the pair of them shared a kiss amazed at how they had told the other person the secret that they hated to have.


	80. Chapter 80

Part 80

"Rach…" Eddie paused realising that the name he secretly always called Rachel in his head he had now disclosed it to her; allowing her to know the term of endearment for her as he felt as though he was in a privileged position to shorten her name. But Eddie immediately felt guilty as he noticed Rachel's raised eyebrow in response signalling that she had noticed it but as yet she had failed to pass judgement upon it which Eddie wasn't sure whether that was a blessing in disguise as it could be that she liked Eddie use of the name or whether it was the quiet before the storm.

"Rach?" Rachel questioned as she was trying to check whether this was something that Eddie meant or was a slip of the tongue and trying to determine what her opinion on this was; normally I would correct the person telling them the appropriate use of my name but coming from Eddie it seems right and normal almost as if it was designed for me to be his 'Rach' something that I would love to be.

The other staff looked at Steph wondering what her response will be as secretly all the other staff believed that Jasmine wasn't the right person for the job as they would do better trying to find things out from Eddie and the only person who was actually friendly enough with Eddie was Tom therefore they were waiting for Steph to suggest this however she interpreted their gaze at her as a different meaning.

"Oh ok then if you insisted I will do it" Steph replied and although her words gave the impression that she was disappointed and reluctant to do it her tone of voice and the expression on her face told them that this was a challenge that she was relishing.

Great how do we tell her that she is definitely not the person that should try and get information from Rachel because we know that she isn't going to be subtle when she does it?

The pair of them stood in silence with Rachel waiting for a reply however at the same time they were both reflecting upon the time when Steph felt Rachel's wrath for the use of 'Rach'.

"So has anyone got any ideas where we could take the pupils on the end of year trip then?" Rachel asked looking around the room knowing that half of the staff had no interest in going on a trip due to the pretence that it would have to be partly educational.

"Well Rach, we could take them to Ibiza" Steph replied and looked around the room looking directly at Matt knowing that this was somewhere where they would be able to reward themselves with plenty of sun, sea and alcohol due to believing that they had had a positive year as the TTG. The pair of them were so interested in organising their plans for the holiday they had forgotten that Rachel hadn't actually agreed to the proposal and she was more incensed about the shortened term of my name.

How dare Steph call me that no-body has ever called me that before perhaps because they knew that I wouldn't be very impressed however I have to ensure that they are in no uncertain terms that I do not appreciate being called Rach as I am her boss after all and it is unprofessional for my staff to call me that.

"My name is Rachel" she replied harshly with a stern expression on her face hoping that she would manage to avoid considering that proposal knowing the reasons why Steph had suggested it not helped by the inane grin that Steph and Matt had adorned on their faces knowing that they may have been facing the prospect of the school providing them with a holiday.

Eddie was pulled from the remising relived that as yet he was yet to receive the same treatment as he was aware of the reserved conversations that were exchanged between the pair of them after that. Trying to create a reason to escape from the silence that was proving to be more awkward as the time slowly passed the pair of them by.

The darkness of the room hid the embarrassment that was shown in Eddie's face realising that he may have tarnished the ever improving relationship with the woman that he loves.

"Sorry Rachel, shall I go and get us both some drinks?" before Rachel was able to reply Eddie had left Rachel's side and already making his way to the bar pushing his right hand through his hair in exasperation.

"I know that Chlo wants to go to Uni so I've had an idea about the baby…well if you agree anyway" Tom said as he gazed into Davina's eyes thrilled at the prospect of making plans about their lives together.

Davina looked at Tom expectantly, intrigued about what the conversation would involve. On seeing the indication that he needed to continue he prepared himself for saying the next comment hoping that he wasn't going to say something that she considered to be outrageous and as a result dismissed out of hand. "Well we will all need to adjust to having a baby in the house but I was thinking that it could be a sort-of trial run for the pair of us". Tom had ducked his head hoping that his new wife would dismiss it totally out of hand therefore he couldn't see her reaction and she failed to notice the rise in colour in Tom's cheeks.


	81. Chapter 81

Part 81

Someone from across the room had noticed that Eddie had left Rachel's side therefore they decided that this was their perfect opportunity to warn Eddie; hoping that it wouldn't put Eddie off the potential relationship with Rachel but at the same time making sure that he was aware of the implications that a failed relationship with Rachel would mean for Eddie.

Standing at the bar beside Eddie was a young man who had come to respect Eddie due to the effect that him and Rachel had put into making him the man that he was today. Admittedly Rachel had instigated the start of the belief but Eddie had been beside her ever step of the way helping her with her decision; picking her up from rock-bottom when the person in question let her down and aiding her with the support to reform the person once again.

Davina looked back at Tom; wishing that he would raise his head so she was able to see his eyes to see whether he was serious about the recent proposition. He should be because his voice sounded as though he was and we are married after all but I wonder if we will be able to manage with two babies in the house; but then I'm getting a bit carried away because he only said that it was practice; actually maybe that's not what he meant at all perhaps I had better try and check and ensure that this is what he wants.

"Are you together with Mason now then?" the person asked needed to clarify the facts before he said something that wasn't true.

Eddie looked back at the person amazed; noting much gets past these people does it. I thought that Steph was bad but she seems nothing in comparison at least she doesn't ask direct questions which are surprisingly hard to answer. What would Rachel want me to say?

"Mason?" Eddie asked with a puzzled expression on his face giving the impression that he didn't know who the person was talking about. Bolton soon realised why; well it was always going to be suspicious if he tried to give the impression that he didn't know who Mason was.

"Sorry…are you with Miss Mason then?" Bolton asked looking directly into Eddie's eyes hoping that this would expression the answer even if his words didn't.

"No comment" Eddie replied knowing that Rachel would appreciate their relationship being spread around the room when they had only agreed to give it a chance 10 minutes ago.

Bolton snorted, "No comment means yes" he replied with a laugh knowing that Eddie had told him everything that he needed to hear.

Eddie tried to rectify the situation, "no it doesn't it just means that I'm not going to say" to which Bolton looked at him with a puzzled expression not quite understand why he wouldn't want the whole world to know that he was with Rachel. I know that I wouldn't be embarrassed so why is Lawson?

"Err, no Steph, I don't think that it should be you because…"Jasmine paused as she was aware of the stern gaze that was directed in her direction from Steph as she was unimpressed that she wasn't going to have the opportunity to do something which would complete her passion for gossip as she would be the person who would be the direct link to Rachel.

"Fine" Steph replied showing that she wasn't impressed with the united decision from her fellow staff.

Quickly changing the direction of the conversation, Matt said, "So then Steph how long are you giving them because you gave Melissa and Eddie 6 weeks so are you going to give them longer than that?" he asked feeling guilty that he hadn't supported his friend in something that she longed to do.

Before Steph was able to comment, Grantly had interrupted, "If I was going to take part; which I'm not I would give them two weeks" he said with a laugh knowing that Steph would give the pair of them slightly longer than that but he believed that his guess was rather accurate despite the puzzled expressions that his comment was greeted with by the other members of staff.

Perhaps I have to try a different way to get him to tell me then. "Aww go on sir, you can tell me because after all Mas…I mean Miss Mason has always looked out for me so I think it is about time that I prepaid the favour" Bolton replied trying to con Eddie into telling him something that he knew should have been kept quiet.

"Just because you think that you are her favourite pupil it doesn't mean that I have to tell you" Eddie replied with a smile as he had seen through what Bolton was trying to do to get Eddie to tell him.

Bolton laughed, "aww don't worry I think that you will always be her favourite teacher" and the surprised expression on Eddie's face made Bolton laugh even more.

"Oi cheeky" Eddie replied enjoying the conversation with Bolton as he knew that the only reason that Bolton wanted to know was because he cared for Rachel therefore it warmed Eddie's heart knowing that he wasn't the only one who cared for Rachel.

"Why would we need practice; surely we have enough practice at work and I know that I only qualified as a teacher this year…" Davina was interrupted by Tom's resting his finger on her lips granting the silence which the statement requested as it gave time for Tom and Davina to question their practicalities and their own desire for whether they individually wanted children and whether they were wanted together in the relationship and the possible changes that would be inevitable with such a decision.

"I know we have practice at work but they are children who are a lot older and aren't either of ours" Tom replied and looked into Davina's intent on seeing her reaction to such a comment.

Davina looked back at Tom confused almost as if she was trying to determine what he was saying so she was able to reply with an answer which would express her opinion on the matter in hand.

"Are you saying what I think that you are?" she asked needing to check her understanding on the issue.

"Yes I think that I am" Tom replied as he wrapped his arm around her waist.

"Seriously sir, I'm happy for the pair of you but please look after her because she definitely deserves it" Bolton replied know feeling awkward at the way that he had showed how much respect that he had for Rachel. "Anyway I better be off" Bolton said trying to walk away from Eddie however he was stopped by the sound of Eddie's voice, "Bolton I admitted that we were together". At this comment Bolton turned around to face Eddie, "you just have".

A look of panic swept across Eddie's face and when Bolton realised this he said, "don't worry I won't tell anyone" to which Eddie smiled and thanked Bolton as once more the teenager walked away from Eddie. I have to admit that Rachel has been an incredible influence on his life as I never thought that Bolton would have been able to change like he has.


	82. Chapter 82

Part 82

On the way back to Rachel, Eddie couldn't hide the smile which was fixed upon his face. I wish that Rachel knew other people cared for her as well because I'm convinced that there are many other teachers that Bolton would care about. Perhaps it is the way that she cares about them and doesn't believe that she is better than any of them. I guess that could be due to her past but it certainly makes me love her more than I thought could be possible and I promise that I will tell her every day to ensure that she knows how I feel about her.

The awkwardness between the pair of them had subsided on Eddie's return as they both felt comforted by Eddie's return almost as if it completed the pair of them and they were with the person that they loved and they knew that they could be themselves with; without having to uphold the pretence that they were something that neither of them claimed to be.

"I got you a drink Rachel" Eddie stated as he held the drink out for her not looking in Rachel's eyes therefore he failed to see the wry smile at the sound of Rachel; missing the opportunity to be his 'Rach'.

Feeling a need to elaborate Grantly replied, "it's because Rachel has so many barriers and refuses to let anyone get passed them therefore Edward will get annoyed and admit defeat. It's not as though he will suffer any great loss any way is it particularly as we all know that Eddie could do so much better when you consider Rachel's ex-profession." Steph looked at him incensed; how can he say that surely he must have some respect for the woman after everything that she has done for the school. I know that I do and I actually like to consider her a friend as she is someone that has helped me through the issues with Earl and Maxine.

"How long do you give them Steph, accounting for her barriers" Grantly asked with a smirk knowing that his comment had annoyed Steph and the other members of staff.

"I believe that the relationship will be serious and I think that they will grow old together with grandchildren running about their feet after their own children have left home" Steph replied and smiled as she could actually imagine that scene in her head and it almost seemed as though it was something that she had already witnessed. Grantly snorted; "how about all her barriers?"

"Is everything alright with Bolton because I saw you talking to him?" Rachel asked concerned as to what Bolton would want with Eddie particularly as he was intent on leaving the school last year claiming that the school had no useful benefit for him but instead he was choosing to talk to one of the teachers at a party.

Eddie finally locked eyes with Rachel revealing in the comfort and love which they harboured; "Yes Rachel, he's fine he just wanted to…" Eddie paused knowing that Rachel wouldn't approve of the fact that the students were talking about the relationship between the two most senior members of staff along with the staff who would probably be discussing it all the time until there was some sort of proof that the relationship was happening especially as they all seemed to have their own ideas when either Rachel or Eddie continued to refuse that they had any feelings for the other. I guess that they always had ideas about the relationship which would happen between us I just wish that Rachel would see it as a positive thing rather than something negative.

Although Eddie was trying to eliminate Rachel's fears by not explaining what he was talking about with Bolton he seemed to heightened her fears even more with her comments judging by the confused expression on her face therefore Eddie knew that he would have to explain to Rachel the recent conversation already preparing for the battle convincing her that the relationship was something that they both deserved and that it would work proving both effective for themselves and the pupils. Not sure how I convince Rachel when she is so stubborn but I had better get thinking because I'm not going to let Rachel go now

Steph thought about her response knowing that whatever she said Grantly wouldn't agree with therefore she decided to use a quote that she remembered and thought that it summed the situation between the pair of them up fairly accurately; "Love takes off masks that we fear we cannot live without and know we cannot live within."

The other staff immediately turned to face Grantly waiting for the response which never came.


	83. Chapter 83

Part 83

Eddie sighed knowing that this would be another awkward conversation with Rachel which would either make or break their future.

"Oh Eddie you're making me really worried now, what is it that Bolton asked" Rachel replied taking the drinks from Eddie's hand; both of them sensing the electricity that raced through their hands on contact with one another. This feeling was increased when Rachel placed the drinks on a nearby table and then took hold of Eddie's hands hoping that this would spur him into a confession where he would admit what was bothering Bolton enough to tell her.

"Rachel there's nothing for you to worry about" Eddie replied trying to delay telling her hoping that he would have a moment of inspiration where he would think of something so he didn't have to tell Rachel the truth however the inspiration failed to come to him therefore he resigned himself to the fact that he would have to be truthful to Rachel. Perhaps a good idea as she would find out eventually.

The wavering voice of Rachel sounded unsure almost critical of Eddie at the way that he was keeping things from her; "Why don't you let me be the judge of that?" Eddie closed his eyes almost as though he couldn't stand to see Rachel looking as vulnerable as she did at the moment. Just shows that the fire did more physiological damage than physical. I wish that I could protect her but it seems evitable that she will push me away.

"Why do you think that we would be able to cope with a family then?" Tom asked Davina as he was thrilled about the prospect of them having children together

"Well I think we won't know until we give it a go" Davina replied knowing that if she and Tom put their mind to it then they would be able to achieve anything. I don't know who else I would want to be a dad to my children because I love Tom and if he loves our children a quarter of the amount that he loves me then they will be incredibly lucky as they will have a life filled with love.

The pair of their conversation was paused with the sudden arrival of Mika standing next to the pair of them.

"Congratulations you two I know that you definitely deserve one another" Mika said as she hugged Tom and in turn hugged Davina. Tom laughed and the pair of them looked at him confused.

"I'm sure you didn't say that before" he said through the laughter as the two women in front of him cringed with Mika feeling embarrassed and the way that Davina was thinking that Tom wasn't very tactful.

The colour started to rise in Mika's cheeks now feeling that she had to apologise. Something I should have probably already done so I guess that it is overdue anyway and it will provide the ideal opportunity now.

"Yeah about that, I'm sorry Davina, I shouldn't have treated you like that because it was wrong of me but I just was struggling to appreciate that there was going to be another woman in Tom's life" Mika admitted to which the pair of them smiled at one another showing that there were no more hard feelings as they understood the situation that they had found themselves in.

Eddie took a deep breath knowing that he didn't want to disclose the recent piece of information to Rachel but knowing that in the long-term it would do more harm than good to keep it hidden therefore he had no option but to tell her.

"Bolton just wanted to say that he was …" Eddie paused as yet he hadn't got the courage that he needed to tell Rachel and immediately she gave his hands a gentle squeeze almost as if she was trying to tell him that she would be here for him no matter what was said by Bolton.

"Eddie please tell me because I need to know then I will be able to help him because I always will stand by what I believe in" Rachel replied looking deep into Eddie's eyes where she could see the conflict. I wonder what it is because it must be something serious because if not he would be able to tell me wouldn't he. I wonder why Bolton felt that he wasn't able to come to me if something is bothering him because I thought that he knew that my door was always open for him or anyone else for that matter.

"Look Mika, I really don't mind about it because it just shows how much you care for Tom" Davina replied and saw Brett standing at the bar ordering drinks for the pair of them again. "So then how are things with Brett?" Tom asked as he didn't think that Mika was too old to have her boyfriends being given a warning if he even thought about hurting her. I know what it did to Mika before so I'm not going to let it happen again although she is away at Uni I still feel that I owe it to Izzie to protect the girls.

Eddie looked at Rachel hoping that he would provide the answer that he wanted for his next question, "Rachel, do you believe in us…our relationship?"


	84. Chapter 84

Part 84

Eddie asked and immediately saw a smile spread across Rachel's face brightening her eyes and easing the lines of concern that had been etched on her face.

"Oh Eddie you know that I want this relationship to work so to answer your question yes I do believe in us" Rachel replied and smiled her real smile at Eddie which made his heart soar due to the knowledge that this smile was most certainly reserved for him as it was very rare that this was seen by anyone else as in its place there was normally the Rachel Mason fake smile which was used to disguise her true emotions and cover up any emotion which may cause suffering at a later date.

Eddie wished that he was able to avoid the conversation instead by wrapping his arms around Rachel's petite frame and holding her knowing that he was in the privileged position to enable him to do this; but then we all know that Rachel wouldn't allow me to do that because she is stubborn so she will insist that I tell her what Bolton said although I don't personally believe that it is a good idea.

"Bolton came to ask me…" Eddie paused until he realised that he would have to tell Rachel eventually so he might as well tell her now so at least he would be able to help Rachel and support her when she claimed that the relationship between the pair of them was jeopardising their professionalism. I think I might have a bit of a challenge on my hands then but then I have fought Ralph off from getting rid of Rachel so surely I will be able to convince Rachel that the relationship between the pair of us is right and something that we both deserve.

"Bolton came to ask me if we were together…as a couple" Eddie mumbled the last part of the sentence but it was still audible to Rachel who had been looking intently at Eddie waiting for him to disclose the piece of information that he had kept guarded for the past few minutes.

In his head Eddie started to count; I guarantee that before I have counted to five I will have received a negative reaction from Rachel.

One... Two. Eddie watched Rachel's eyes widen as if she was trying to comprehend what he had just said; taking it in and realising the imprecations that would be caused due to the fellow people in the room knowing that the pair of them were having a relationship.

Three. Eddie watched as Rachel's eyes flickered down to the pair of their hands which were still entwined; showing the strong connection that the pair of them had. Immediately she raised her eyes from their hands and hastily glanced around the room with the fear that once more they would be the central attraction; she had a fear that once more her private life was on display as a form of entertainment for everyone else; almost as if it was a soap comedy.

Four. Eddie felt the reaction that he had been waiting for as his hands were released from hers and they dropped down to his side almost as if they were now being disregarded having fulfilled their purpose in offering the comfort that she once craved from him.

Rachel kept avoid eye-contact with Eddie trying to formulate a plan in her own head as to how she would get out of the situation that her lack of self-control had caused her to end up in. Great, if the pupils know then the staff must also know and it isn't very professional is it.

Eddie knew that Rachel was going to take it badly but he just hoped that she believe in their relationship enough to allow it to overcome further obstacles that were thrown in its direction as it was she had admitted defeat on it instantly something that pained Eddie.

Eddie tried to take her hands once more trying to goad her into looking into his eyes which for full of love and care for the woman in front of him so he would be able to change her mind get her to say the words that he desperately needed to hear and fully commit to the relationship that the pair of them craved from one another but as it was neither of them could fully commit due to a fear of upsetting the other and pushing them away closing the door on any chance that the relationship would have to blossom into something that would provide Eddie and Rachel with everything that they were missing in their lives and allowing them to live their life experiences together.

"Eddie don't" Rachel replied as she folded her arms ensuring that Eddie wasn't going to allow him to persuade her to comply with his way of solving the problem which faced the pair of them.

"Why Rachel, you said that you believed in our relationship; it looks like it" Eddie replied sarcastically knowing that he had already effectively lost Rachel. I knew that it was too good to be true.

"Oh Eddie don't be like that you know my feelings on other people knowing about the pair of us" Rachel replied as she looked into his eyes seeing the hurt that she had created ever since she had released his hands. "Surely you must care that other people are talking about us?" She asked unable to believe that Eddie was being so calm about being the centre of speculation.


	85. Chapter 85

Part 85

"Mika looked back at the pair of them almost as if she was trying to determine what the serious topic of conversation they had been discussing before she joined the pair of them. Well it looked serious judging by the expression on their faces would it be very nosey if I asked them about it…probably but then I have always been told that if you don't ask, you don't know.

"So then what were the pair of you discussing then because it looked serious and I might be able to help" Mika said as the two of them looked towards one another uncertain as to whether they should disclose their plans to her. The pair of them knew from looking in one another's eyes that they didn't want to.

"Nothing particular" Tom replied and Davina returned a grateful smile to show that she was pleased that the two of them were keeping their plans between them for a bit longer.

No if they are talking about us it gives someone else a rest…" Eddie paused realising that this probably wasn't the most tactful thing to say to Rachel particularly when her life was in the public spot light last year due to her past. Eddie looked back at Rachel and saw that her face had dropped considerable realising that her and Eddie's priorities were different. The question is if we will ever be able to find any common ground which will keep the relationship strong because I would hate to think that the relationship will end after what 2 hours especially when I debated whether to start the relationship for a good year.

"Well Eddie I'm a bit sick of begin in the spotlight it's not to bad for you because I guess that you will like the attention however it's not like that for me it is just another stick for people like Ralph Mellor to beat me with". Rachel explained and immediately any feeling of anger swept from his mind as now his main priority was to ensure that the 'failed' relationship with him hadn't set her back and sending her back to the fragile, scared woman that she had been when she had returned to the school following the fire. I will never forgive myself because I couldn't bear it if I have caused the woman that I love to suffer further particularly when I promised that I would look after her and care for her no matter what happened and we would overcome any obstacles that were placed in our past; facing them together; as a team.

"So then, have the others filled you in with the gossip that you've missed?" Davina asked Mika as she was desperately trying to change the conversation away from what her and Tom had previously been discussing.

"Yeah I think so because they were telling me that Miss Haydock has started a bet on whether Lawson and Mason are together". Tom and Davina looked sheepish and immediately Mika understood the reason why.

"Tom!" she exclaimed, "You joined in as well; how could you" she asked in disgust thinking that it was wrong for people to make financial gain when other people's future was involved.

"Well I didn't mean to it just kind of happened" Tom replied with the colour starting to rise in his cheeks. I think I preferred having to tell Davina at least it was easier than Mika being unimpressed with me.

"Davina why didn't you stop him?" Mika asked thinking that she would never have gone along with such an idea but the way that Davina had dipped her head made Mika realise that she had also joined in with the bet. I can't believe it I leave for a year and this is what it results in.

"No Rachel, I didn't mean it like that…I meant that if they are talking about us I will be honoured…" Eddie stopped to the ever increasing confused expression on Rachel's face. I really don't think that I am explaining this very well it is times like this that I wish that I was an English teacher because then I would be able to tell her exactly how I feel somehow I don't think that a quadratic equation will aid me in telling her how I feel in my heart. Perhaps that is what I have to do; I have to speak from the heart; put my on the line; risk it getting broken into minuscule pieces to enable it to join with Rachel's and we can fully commit to the future which I hold lies parallel with Rachel's.

Eddie looked into Rachel's eyes vowing that she would hear the way that his heart feels whether it made any difference to their relationship or not. "I would be honoured if they were talking about us because it would mean that they think there is an us; to talk about…something that I will never be ashamed of". Eddie reached his left hand out and lifted Rachel's chin to force her into looking into his eyes so she could see how serious he was and the way that he felt about her.


	86. Chapter 86

Part 86

Eddie had continued talking before Rachel was able to reply making sure that she was in no uncertain doubt the strength of his feelings for her. And if she still feels that the relationship is unprofessional then begrudgingly I will accept her decision and make sure that I turn my love for her into ensuring that this hasn't affected the friendship which I crave.

"It was times like this that I wish that I could say how I feel but I have never been very good at this type of thing…perhaps the reason why it took so long for me to admit to my feelings in the first place". Rachel smiled at Eddie trying to show that she understood how hard this was for him and she was trying to make it as easy as possible.

"I understand that you didn't want to tell people and I understand the reasons why but please don't believe me that we are ending it because other people know because it has been nearly impossible for me not to tell people but I haven't…I didn't even confirm it to Bolton". Eddie said as they locked eyes being absorbed into the other's eyes.

"That's the problem though if the pupils know won't they think that it is unprofessional for the two most senior members of staff to have a relationship with one another". Rachel replied with a hurt expression on her face knowing that the end of this conversation was going to result in some major decisions being made on their future.

"No personally I don't think that it is unprofessional because it will show them that relationships can work and that although it isn't always easy it is something that two people share and can make a positive influence on the two people in question" Eddie replied hoping that his little speech would get Rachel on his side so that she would give them a chance.

"But what if this relationship doesn't work and it proves that there is a negative atmosphere as I don't think that I will be able to continue, if the relationship doesn't work" Rachel admitted and then looked at Eddie to try and gauge his reaction to this comment.

"Look Rachel, I'm not saying it's going to be easy, I know there are going to be times when we both want to walk out on one another vowing that this was something that was never going to work. However I promise you that I will never leave you as I love you and I can't imagine my life without you. Because you Rachel are my life" Eddie started to explain telling Rachel his thoughts which were coming from the bottom of his heart. I must admit that I am doing pretty well even if I do say it myself because it seems as though I am saying something that makes sense and is portraying the emotions which I need her to know that I feel.

Rachel showed her first reaction to any of Eddie's comments when she rolled her eyes at his idea that she is his life. That's not right he is the one that has made my life worth living by believing in me and seeing beyond my past…something that other people have felt unable to do. That's why I need this relationship to work with Eddie because he is my rock and support and I really don't know what I would do if I had to survive days without him by my side knowing that I wouldn't have an ally.

Eddie smiled back at her lack of confidence in herself, "Rachel I'm being serious; you are the reason that I wake up in the morning, you are the reason that I arrive at work and you are the reason that I never want to leave". Eddie answered trying to transfer the confidence that he had in her to Rachel.

"So do you think that the relationship between us will work" Rachel asked needing to give Eddie one last escape before she would commit to the relationship. I couldn't stand it if the relationship ended in a few weeks because he decided that the idea of a relationship seemed a lot more exciting than the relationship itself.

"Yes Rachel I know that it will work because I love you and I will never let you go because I know that it would kill me" Eddie replied as he pulled Rachel into his arms amazed that he had been able to win a stubborn Rachel round to his way of thinking. That is something that I never thought would happen.

"Ok Eddie I agree that I'm probably over-reacting about the staff and pupils knowing because knowing Steph as I do she has probably already taken a bet on the relationship that the pair of us have" Eddie was relieved that Rachel had rested her head on his chest because it prevented her being able to see the knowing expression on his face. I wonder if Rachel knows that they have got a bet on us because Steph and Matt were quizzing me the other day as to whether we had started a relationship.

"Well Rachel if you don't want to go public that is fine by me because I love you and I would rather the relationship was something for the two of us rather than not having a relationship at all. We will take this relationship at your pace because Rachel Mason I love you" Eddie disclosed with a smile on his face; amazed that he was still in a position to say that to her.

Rachel raised her head off Eddie's chest and looked at him in the eyes and saw that they were full of love for her and she knew that he would live every day vowing to make her happy. "Eddie Lawson I love you too but you know earlier when you called me 'Rach'…" Eddie looked down to the floor feeling embarrassed knowing that it was due to that simple phrase which had caused the start of this entire conversation.

"Yeah sorry about that" Eddie mumbled knowing that this was something that Rachel didn't appreciate. I must remember not to call her that because I couldn't stand it if it caused another situation like tonight because I honestly thought that I had lost her and I didn't know how I was going to cope without her.

"No that's what I wanted to talk about, I would be honoured if I could be your 'Rach'. She said looking into his eyes able to notice the surprised expression which enlighten across his face with the realisation as to what Rachel meant.

"Yes I would love it if you believed I was worthy enough to call you my Rach" Eddie replied looking into Rachel's eyes to ensure that it was what she wanted.

"Eddie; darling, I know that you are because you have captured my heart" Rachel answered as she once more rested her head on Eddie's chest listening to his heart beating knowing that this was the place that held all his love for her. I know that I wouldn't normally let someone call me Rach but it sounded so natural coming from his lips that I know it is something that I couldn't survive not hearing. Must be the effect love has on me…and if I'm honest I quite like it.


	87. Chapter 87

Part 87

"So then Mattie boy, we have to come up with a plan because grumpy Grantly won't pay up until the pair of them admit to having a relationship. You do realise the only reason he is saying that is because Rachel will want to keep it private therefore she isn't going to tell anyone and she has probably sworn Eddie to secrecy". Steph said as she glared at Grantly knowing that he was probably going to be able to keep his money although he had technically lost the bet.

"I wonder if we could get Rachel to tell us whether they are in a relationship" Matt suggested; why is Steph looking at me as though I am stupid if we want to know why don't we just ask her?

"Thanks Matt; now why didn't I think of that" Matt grinned at her in response and Steph realised that he was being serious. What am I going to do with him?

"Do you actually think that Rachel is going to tell us even if we ask her because I somehow doubt it" Steph replied in an angry tone wishing that her best friend used the small amount of common sense that he had.

Matt looked back at Steph hurt; I honestly thought that it was worth a go asking her because the worst thing that she can do is deny it…perhaps I will ask her without Steph knowing about it. I will be so pleased if she told me because Steph would have to admit that it was a good idea. "So then Miss Master-plan what you do propose we do?"

Rachel threw the pen on top of the paperwork in frustration; I'm sick of seeing numbers; if only I had someone who wanted to do them for me because I don't think my brain can cope with many more. Perhaps there is something else that I could do to prevent me having to work out the school budgets; I honestly don't know why I bother though because the governors always claim that there isn't enough money in the school fund to make any chances anyway so me knowing exactly how much money there is; isn't of any relevance to me really.

"Well we need someone close to them who is going to be naïve so they won't see through our questions and they will provide us with the answers that we desperately need". Steph asked and silence took hold of the staff room as the pair of them both were trying to think of the person that would fulfil all of these categories. I wonder if Steph knows anyone because I can think of someone who may be able to help us, and although Steph may not think so I believe that it is an inspired choice.

"So then Steph have you thought of anyone?" Matt asked with a smug expression on his face however Steph wasn't impressed and this was represented in the very loud groan that she did in response to his question, "Why do I have to think of everything" she asked but then paused noticing his expression. Oh dear…I know that expression he believes that it is a good idea when it blatantly isn't. Steph took a deep breath trying to control her emotions before she asked her next question, "So Matt who is it that you have thought of?"

Ahh, it's not very often that there is an afternoon where I haven't got something to do causing me to be rushing around. Curling her feet underneath her, she rested her head on the back of the sofa enjoying the tranquilly of the situation. How very unprofessional; I have become very laid-back; I wonder if I am adopting the traits of someone who is forever in my heart.

Rachel couldn't deny the smile which graced her lips with the thought of the person in question. He would laugh at me if he could see me now but that would mean that someone else in joining me and I would have to pretend that I am actually planning on doing some work. It was then that Rachel's thoughts were interrupted by the sound of someone knocking on her door. I knew that I had spoken to fast as it was too good to be true. Hmm I wonder who that could be; Rachel opened her eyes preparing to allow someone to invade her sanctity. Perhaps I can pretend that I'm not here so they will leave me alone…although that's probably not very likely because where else would I be?

Matt grinned back at her, "prepare to be amazed" he said to which Steph tried to smile politely back whist thinking; I doubt it.

"Who knew Rachel before anyone else working here had seen her?" Matt asked and smiled further at the puzzled expression on Steph's face. See it is so good that Steph hadn't even considered the person.

"The school governors?" Steph suggested hoping that this was the people that Matt had thought of.

But she was surprised when he shook his head and said; "Think harder" the daft smile that was plastered across his face did nothing to comfort Steph. I really can't think of the person…perhaps I don't know them.

"Are you sure that I know the person?" Steph asked have expecting it to be someone who Matt had met in the pub one night therefore she was even further confused when he nodded.

Steph was getting exasperated in not knowing therefore she replied; "Oh just tell me" to which Matt grinned and said the one name which Steph was least expecting. I was right this was a really stupid idea of his!


	88. Chapter 88

Part 88

Steph stared back at Matt unable to believe his recent suggestion; and I thought that Matt was intelligent however with what he had shown just implies that he isn't; perhaps if I asked him to explain it will make more sense…somehow I doubt it though. Perhaps I will have to talk to Grantly more because surely he has more sense than Matt…actually he tries to deny Rachel's and Eddie's feelings for one another…note to self; must find new intelligent friends.

"I don't understand; why would we want her to come back when it took so much effort to get her to leave in the first place" Steph asked as she couldn't understand the reasons behind getting her to come back and the grin on Matt's face did nothing to reassure her. I didn't put so much effort in getting her to leave to invite her to come back.

Begrudgingly Rachel called out for the person to enter her office; perhaps I can get rid of them as quickly as possible as if anything needs dealing with I can send them Eddie's way can't I? Rachel smiled knowing this wasn't really an option; as I don't think that Eddie would be very impressed particularly as he has a lesson now.

"Well she is the one person who would have known Rachel before anyone else so she would know her better than anyone else" Matt replied believing that his proposal held some logic. "So do you agree then?" Matt asked and he was nodding gently at Steph trying to get her to agree with him. See she must have doubted this idea but now she is going to have to agree that it is a good idea and I like the feeling of Steph having to rely on me.

Rachel was still sitting on the sofa when the door opened and smiled at the sight of the person who had entered her sanctity which was unexpected as she had instantly taken a dislike to the person who was standing outside the door however when they entered the office her opinion on them was very different.

"Hi Phil, come in and sit down" Rachel said to Phil who was looking nervous as this was still a situation that he didn't feel entirely comfortable with. That's nothing due to Aunty Rachel but I just feel that I'm living with her when I should be living with mum…if I can call her that…but I feel that I'm putting Rachel out when she doesn't want to have to worry about me.

Steph stared back at Matt half expecting him to laugh and say how he was joking…Please tell me that he is joking because I would hate to think that he actually believes that it is a good idea. Let's just wait a couple of seconds and he will put me out of my misery…Ok it doesn't look as though he thinks that it is a stupid idea then; shall I let him down gently or just tell him what a stupid idea it is?

"Let me get this right; you want us to invite Melissa back here to see whether she can find out if Eddie and Rachel are in a relationship?" Steph asked and Matt nodded eagerly.

"Yep that is the grand plan" he replied and waited patiently for Steph declaration that this was a brilliant plan however a small part of him knew that he would be waiting a very long time to hear these words come from Steph..

"No Matt that is a very bad plan and in no uncertain terms we are not doing that" Steph replied and Matt looked at her incredibly hurt before marching to the sofa and replying, "fine I know when I'm not appreciated you can think of the idea yourself because you never appreciate anything I say".

He is being rather melodramatic isn't he or have I been unfair to him.


	89. Chapter 89

Part 89

"Phil is everything ok?" Rachel asked the teenage boy who was now sitting in the sofa but looking equally as nervous as he had when he was standing just inside Rachel's office until she invited him to enter and sit on the sofa. The tension was increased in the room due to the noticeable nerves that Phil seemed to be suffering from; simply because he kept avoiding eye-contact and he nodded hastily to any question that Rachel asked him trying to eliminate the tension before getting onto the topic as to why Phil had come to her office during his break.

"Matt don't be like that...it's just that I don't think that is a good idea" Steph tried to backtrack and avoiding a conflict with her best friend and the person that she held similar views to.

"Yeah well you never think that anything I say is right do you?" Matt asked indignantly as he was annoyed that Steph didn't agree with his brilliant plan.

"Although I don't think that we should get Melissa to help us partly because I can't look at her without wanting to be sarcastic towards her, but I have got somebody else in mind". Steph replied and although Matt was trying to uphold the pretence that Matt wasn't interested in the recent developments Steph could tell that she had captured his attention.

I wonder what the matter is because I know he must be missing Melissa; surely he has got to be as she is his mum after all…perhaps I should have tried to talk to him about it realising that pretending their wasn't an issue wouldn't do any good for him. But I guess I thought that if he didn't mention it I wasn't going to push it because if he is even a little bit like me…not that he would be because I haven't had any impact on his life but if for some reason he was I know that he wouldn't appreciate being nagged and questioned. I just hoped that he would have felt that he was able to talk to me if he felt that he had any problems.

Rachel looked back at Phil to see his hands clamped together in front of him with his knuckles whitened due to the stress that he was placing upon them. Poor lad I hope that he feels that he can talk to me. Looking downwards until his focus was blurred with the tears that were starting to glisten in his eyes; unknown to him, Rachel was watching him wishing that she was able to absorb all the pain and suffering that he was feeling and live with it for herself. Because I know that I deserve it because of the mistakes that I have made and continue to make but Phil doesn't…he is just a kid and he doesn't deserve to be abandoned by Melissa…how much I wish that I could kill Melissa but I know that there would be a line that I would have to join and somehow I think Phil would be first.

Davina walked into the kitchen and immediately walked over to the fridge in the corner looking for something to eat. It's true what Tom says being a teacher definitely takes it out of you as over the last few days I have felt incredibly hungry and tired.

"Davina would you like a drink?" Jasmine asked from the sink where she was starting to make drinks for her fellow teachers that were already in the staff room.

Rachel looked back at Phil to see his hands clamped together in front of him with his knuckles whitened due to the stress that he was placing upon them. Poor lad I hope that he feels that he can talk to me. Looking downwards until his focus was blurred with the tears that were starting to glisten in his eyes; unknown to him, Rachel was watching him wishing that she was able to absorb all the pain and suffering that he was feeling and live with it for herself. Because I know that I deserve it because of the mistakes that I have made and continue to make but Phil doesn't…he is just a kid and he doesn't deserve to be abandoned by Melissa…how much I wish that I could kill Melissa but I know that there would be a line that I would have to join and somehow I think Phil would be first.

Rachel saw a tear drop being soaked into the carpet and she knew that she could no longer sit back and watch hoping that Phil would be able to overcome the battle inside his head by himself as he obviously needed guidance and support; something that Rachel also needed but she had learnt to suffer alone while nobody else was able to see the quiet suffering of the woman. Partly because they never looked hard enough to see it; I guess that I was never worth it but I'm determined that Phil isn't going to feel the same because I know from first-hand experience that it hurts…I can't do a lot about Melissa leaving but I can try to help him now.

Rachel shuffled closer to Phil on the sofa until she was able to reach out her hand and place it upon Phil's hands which were still what held his attention in the room; whether he noticed that Rachel was offering her support was of no consequence as Phil didn't signal any response to the action from the head teacher. I suppose it has all taken its toll of him and I was too concerned about my life with Eddie that I failed to see it. I know that living with the head teacher of his school isn't 'cool' but I have honestly tried my best; giving him the love and attention that I never felt as a child…and most probably he hasn't as I can't imagine Melissa doing much of a job.


	90. Chapter 90

Part 90

Using her other hand Rachel rubbed Phil's back trying to ease the suffering of the young man that Rachel had grown to love and respect but at the moment she felt helpless not knowing the words or the actions that were desired at this moment in time.

Believing that Phil needed support Rachel used her arm that was placed on Phil's back to place it around Phil's waist and pulled him into her until he was resting his head on her shoulder. Although he never expressed his gratification at this action it gave him the confidence that he needed to express his thoughts; the sole reason which had brought him to Rachel's office during his break.

Davina turned around quickly and for a moment her vision was blurred causing her to stumble forward slightly before she reached the work-surface that was in front of her; which was something that didn't go unnoticed by the other people particularly Tom who was sitting in the corner.

Phil closed his eyes trying to compose his thoughts so he was able to express them to Rachel; the way that he had initially planned to before his emotions got the better of him. Therefore he was unaware of the door opening and the person that Rachel wanted to see more than anyone was about to walk through the door but he was stopped by the sight which confronted him.

A quick smile was passed between the pair of them and then the door was shut leaving Rachel and Phil in the room together again.

Rachel's thoughts were interrupted by the sound of Phil's voice, "I want to ask you something…its fine if you say no because I fully expect you too". Phil spoke quickly rushing his questions almost as if he wasn't comfortable in the situation that he found himself in. I know that mum would say no and as it is a school night Rachel probably will but I just thought that I should ask as I would love to go.

Tom immediately saw the stumble by Davina and was instantly concerned about her welfare. "Davina are you ok?" Tom asked as he stood up and started to walk towards her as she had just removed her hands from the work-surface and had a fake smile fixed upon her face showing that everything was 'fine'.

Jasmine walked up to her looking apprehensive as she was worried as to what would be wrong with Davina, "do you want to sit down because you look awfully pale now?" she said and by this time Tom had reached Davina and wrapped his arm around her waist to ensure that she wasn't going to fall backwards.

"No I'm fine thanks I just need something to eat as I haven't eaten today" Davina replied to the pair of them and although the pair of them looked dubious at her but they seemed to accept what she said as Jasmine walked back to the kettle making drinks for the teachers in the staffroom.

"Can I go to a party tonight?" Phil asked Rachel as he had composed himself enough to ask the question that was inadvertently causing him so much emotion due to the constant reminders of the life that he had and the way that it was changing out of his control. I wish I was able to decide the way that I was living my life because I love living with Rachel. It's better than it ever was living with mum but I hate the fact that when I will serve useful to her purpose she will return and try and whisk me back with her until she leaves to go to another 'dark place'. I don't know how many 'dark places' one person can go to but she has found several.

Rachel took a while to respond to the question knowing that this wasn't the reason why he was so upset when he entered her office 5 minutes ago. I wonder if I should try and find it out or accept that he seems to have got over it and leave it at that. I wish I knew the answers to these questions as however much Eddie tries to tell me that I'm doing a good job with Phil; I won't believe it because he needs his mum because surely a bad mother is better than a auntie who he has only known for a few months.

Feeling that she needed to know more about the party, Rachel decided the best option was to ask questions and then make a judgement on the end as to whether it was a good idea as to whether it would be a good idea to let him go.

"Where is this party then?" Rachel asked and immediately Phil replied showing that he was eager to go to the party, "it's at Bolton's house"

"So then what is your plan" Matt asked to Steph who was now sitting beside one another on the sofa after Steph had apologised about criticising his idea which she had unwittingly agreed would be the plan they would use if her idea failed. I hope that my plan works because I really don't want to have to 'invite' Melissa to come back and I can't believe that Matt even suggested it.

Steph grinned back at him knowing that this plan would work and the pair of them would receive great reward from the rest of the staff in uniting Rachel and Eddie.

However before Steph was able to respond their conversation turned into a hushed silence as Jasmine had sat down by the pair of them and it was the first time since the incident with Davina that anything else had captured her attention. I wonder what they are talking about because although I don't agree with the gossiping that the pair of them undertake; it is interesting because they find things out that the rest of us never would discover. I'm just thankful that to my knowledge I have never been the product of their gossiping.

After several questions regarding who else would be at the party and time that the party would end, Phil asked Rachel once more whether he would be allowed to go. At the moment it seems quite promising because she didn't dismiss it totally out of hand like mum would have done.

"Do you really want to go?" Rachel asked almost as if she needed final clarification that Phil really wanted to go to the party. Should I let him go; it is a school night so in that respect I shouldn't but it seems as though he is making friends something he desperately needs as he hasn't got much family left

Phil nodded eagerly showing his feelings on the matter, to which Rachel had come to a conclusion, "yes Phillip you can go but please don't be too late back as it is a school night" Rachel replied which caused Phil to stretch his arms out and embrace Rachel in a hug that he was convinced he had never given his mother.


	91. Chapter 91

Part 91

Jasmine rolled her eyes unable to believe that the pair of them were probably still talking about Rachel and Eddie. How much gossip can the pair of them find to talk about because it fills their past-time for the entire day surely they must have something more interesting to talk about?

"Please don't stop on my account" Jasmine said sarcastically to the pair of them who were yet to continue their conversation as they were unaware of Jasmine's intents especially when she sat down by the side of them.

Matt and Steph looked uneasily at one another knowing that Jasmine would be quite happy to tell either Rachel or Eddie the intentions of the two biggest gossips in the school, especially if it concerned the match-making plans from the pair of them.

The bell was about to ring but still Phil was sitting in Rachel's office unable to believe that she had allowed him to go to the party. I almost want to ask her if she is sure that I can go however I'm scared that she will change her mind. Rachel still had her arms wrapped around Phil pulling him closer to her knowing that it was these type of moments that she missed out when she was younger. I always promised that if I ever had children of my own I would ensure that they always felt loved and Emma was taken away from me… Rachel paused as she reflected upon time spent with her daughter hating the way that she was taken away from her before Rachel was ever truly able to appreciate moments like this.

"So then what have you found to gossip about now?" Jasmine asked trying to resist the temptation to sound interested although a small part of her liked the scandal that would be revealed by the pair of them however the hurt expression on the pair of their faces told Jasmine that she wasn't going to find much out anyway. I'm interested to hear to a certain extent however I believe that they shouldn't be so interested because Rachel and Eddie's business is private and it doesn't require any input from the rest of us particularly Steph and Matt.

"Who says that we were gossiping about anyone?" Steph replied as the pair of them mirrored the hurt expression on their face almost as if they were trying too hard to maintain the pretence that they weren't talking about anyone. Are me and Matt that predictable that they know we are obviously talking about someone…probably. Due to Steph's thought she laughed out loud at the realisation that her and Matt were extremely predictable to the other staff members in the school however due to the confused glances that she received from Matt and Jasmine this laughter was changed into a coughing fit.

"Phillip, I wanted to ask you something…" Rachel paused as she realised that this conversation was going to be awkward for the pair of them especially as Phil wasn't very good at expressing his thoughts through words.

Hoping that the conversation wasn't going to be as awkward as it sounded Phil pulled away slightly from Rachel so he was able to look at her in the eye; realising that Phil was ready for her to continue she took a deep breath and prepared to ask a question which would determine both of their futures.

On hearing the reply Jasmine rolled her eyes knowing that the pair of them had been talking about someone but the only question was who? Well the obvious candidate is Rachel and Eddie as they seem to always be under scrutiny by the two gossip queens. However I wouldn't put it past them to be talking about somebody else; perhaps they are trying to match-make the rest of us…although I wouldn't complain too much if they were trying to find someone for me; but I would never give them the credit for it of course.

"So who were you talking about then?" Jasmine asked knowing that they wouldn't be able to constantly deny it.


	92. Chapter 92

Part 92

Once more Steph and Matt looked at one another hoping that the other would take the incentive and provide an answer that would be realistic. I hadn't better rely on Matt then because he would say something dreadful which won't be realistic at all.

Jasmine gave the pair of them another quizzical expression which caused Steph to provide an answer; hoping that it would be seen as realistic and disguise the fact that they had just been caught out talking about Rachel and Eddie once more. "No we were discussing that Davina doesn't look very well so we were contemplating whether we should suggest whether she should go home" Steph replied trying to give the impression that she had actually had this conversation with Matt and surprisingly Matt seemed to act as though he had some knowledge as to what Steph was talking about.

"Phil are you happy?" Rachel asked to her nephew who looked at her confused almost as if she was able to see through the fake smiles that he used to give the impression that everything is 'fine'. How would Rachel know that something is bothering me I thought that I had kept it hidden so how would she be able to tell? And furthermore will I be able to tell her because I don't think that I can even explain it to myself at the moment. Sensing that Rachel was waiting for an answer Phil continued with his fake smile and replied far too enthusiastically to be convincing for Rachel's liking. He is so stubborn I wonder where he gets that from? I always thought that he felt like he was able to tell me anything but something is troubling him and he feels that he is unable to tell me…I have failed him already; he is no better off living with me than he was living with Melissa; at least she was his mother, whereas I'm doing a bad job at being his aunty never mind his guardian.

Jasmine looked back at the pair of them slightly confused as to why they would be alarmed about Davina's health but being typical Jasmine she looked for the best of people and as a result she accepted this at face-value and choosing to engage in a conversation with the pair of them. I wonder why they care about Davina…perhaps I have always mistaken the pair of them believing that they only care about mindless gossip but instead they are quite compassionate towards other people.

"Well I agree with you because I'm worried about her as she had a bit of a funny turn earlier by the cabinet…" Jasmine confessed and immediately the pair were interested in the news that Jasmine was providing and their need for gossip over powered their thoughts of Rachel and Eddie therefore Steph continuing trying to grill Jasmine about Davina's 'condition'.

Looks like it will be harder than I thought I get the information from Phil so I had better try a lot harder acting as more of a mother than a head teacher! "Phil you would tell me if there was something wrong would you…because you know that I only want to help don't you?" Rachel asked hoping that this would coax Phillip into telling her something however this only received a similar reply to the previous question "I'll bear that in mind if I ever need to tell you something" Phil replied and the response would have been convincing if Rachel didn't see the flicker of hope that his eyes contained when he realised what Rachel had said. I wish that he felt that he was able to tell me but how do I get through to him.

"So has she had any other symptoms?" Steph asked Jasmine trying to sound as heartfelt as possible and Matt who had failed to see the connection that Steph had instantly drawn was looking at Steph bewildered as he was confused as to why she would be so interested in a woman who served no useful purpose to their quest in discovering the extent of Rachel and Eddie's feelings for one another. Steph sighed at the sight that confronted her; two very blank faces and wondered how she had managed to put up with the staff around her for so long. Anyone would think that I'm talking in another language…I would say that it is French but we all know that I'm not particularly very good at it…as stated by Brett Aspinall every lesson that I used to have his class for.


	93. Chapter 93

Part 93

"Phil, I do you wish that you were still living with your mum" Rachel asked hoping that it would encourage Phil to open up about something which was so obviously troubling him. Phil had been trying to act really confident and overly smiley immediately ducked his head with an emotionless expression on his face almost as if he couldn't quite believe the question that was asked of him. How do I answer that question without hurting Rachel because I don't want to hurt her but at the same time I want to be able to tell the truth?

Rachel placed her hand on Phil's arm trying to reassure him that she would be happy with either answer as she was more concerned about his welfare then her own situation.

"Well I wonder if we will be hearing the sound of tiny patters of feet soon." Steph suggested to the pair of them who continued with the blank expressions. Immediately the pair of them started to realise what Steph meant and their reaction to the news was incredibly different; as Matt had started grinning sensing another opportunity to make money out of the good people of Waterloo Road staff. Even if they are a little naïve…unlike me and Steph.

Phil looked back in Rachel's eyes and she could see the tears that were starting to glisten. I knew that she knew something was wrong I just hoped that I was able to escape before she questioned me about it but now it seems that I have to provide her with a proper answer; one that doesn't just avoid the issue.

"Honestly Phil, you can tell me the truth I want to be able to help you as I can clearly see that you are upset" Rachel replied as she looked into his eyes hoping that the sincerity which was shown in them would be enough to convince him.

Realising that it might actually help him to tell someone his feelings rather than keeping them bottled up inside; Phil started to explain his thoughts to Rachel hoping that she wouldn't be too hurt by them and she could understand what he meant.

"And to think that I thought that you were actually caring about somebody else" Jasmine replied having seen the gestures that were exchanged between Matt and Steph when the recent comment was made by Steph. Jasmine stormed out of the staff room unimpressed as she had figured that Steph and Matt were going to participate in another bet. What is wrong with her I think that it is an inspired idea because me and Matt have a head start in the betting stakes and it's not our fault that we have had inside gossip from the best friend is it?

Although the pair of them were still considering the practicalities of the new money-making incentive, Matt had returned the topic of conversation that they had been having before Jasmine had unwittingly given them another idea.

"So then Steph what is your plan then?" Matt asked with excitement in his voice as he was delighted about the alternate piece of gossip that they had just acquired.

"In a strange sort of way; I wish that I was still living with mum…"Phil paused trying to determine a reaction from Rachel however he never received one as she knew that looking upset would have only made it harder for Phil as he would have started to feel guilty and that wasn't the object of this conversation. I have to be strong for him and accept that although she didn't give him the love that he deserves she was still his mother and he will always love her.

Phil was confused by the lack of emotion being shown by Rachel as Phil had only known one other woman properly; Melissa, and if he did or said anything that she didn't agree with Melissa would continue berating Phil until he either changed his mind to agree with her opinion or make him feel guilty and cause him to apologise. When you think about it like that; she would do anything to get her own way. But how about Rachel because they are sisters so surely they can't be that different; so does that mean that Rachel approves of my decision and wants to get rid of me.


	94. Chapter 94

Part 94

If I wasn't confused before I certainly am now, I thought that Rachel liked having me around but obviously not. Phil took one last glance at Rachel's face and saw something that he had managed to miss before; or Rachel is letting her true feelings show. The sadness in her eyes is apparent; perhaps she does like me living with her and I have just hurt her feelings; I knew that this was going to be a bad conversation so I had better solve the issue. "But I will be eternally grateful to you because you took me in when she abandoned me…" Once more Phil paused knowing that he wasn't actually expressing his feelings at all well. This is when I wish I had a better mum who showed me some affection because maybe I would be able to express my feelings better instead of just going off on a tangent.

Tom and Davina followed Jasmine out of the staff room desperate to capture as much time together as possible so it would be easier when they had to part for a lesson apart. Although it never is; I never thought after Izzie I would love anybody else because Izzie was perfect and I don't think anyone could come close to her. I know that is a dreadful thing to say about Davina; don't get me wrong; Davina is great and I love her but she just isn't Izzie. But I have to accept that Izzie is gone and she is never coming back and the love that we had for one another would result in us wanting the other one to be happy. Unconscientiously Tom had placed his arm around Davina's waist and rather than it being for the public show of affection it was because he was becoming genuinely concerned about her.

Phil took another deep breath preparing himself for something that was drastically out of his comfort zone. But I have to make Rachel understand and I think this is the only way I can do it; so I had better stop being the social inept boy and become the young man that Rachel has taught me to be…see no mean feat.

"Rachel…any chance that I can start my answer again" Phil asked with embarrassment which Rachel didn't fail to notice in her confusion; however she nodded her head knowing that if she spoke her words would show emotion similarly to the way her eyes had betrayed her. Great, I have made him feel guilty now why is it I can hide my emotions from everyone bar Eddie and Phil.

Kim walked into the staff room and immediately Steph's face lit up, "Sorry Matt I can't tell you as there isn't time so we will have to just put it into action" Steph replied as the pair of their eyes fell upon the woman who had just walked towards the kettle with the intent on making a drink. Glancing back at Steph; Matt could see the excitement in her face. This must be some impressive plan to make Steph look like this although I must admit that I thought my plan was clever but obviously not clever enough for Steph…hang on; if I haven't approved of this plan how do we know that it is any better than mine? Perhaps I could ask Steph. Looking back at Steph's child-like grin on her face; Matt knew that after everything she had gone through with Maxine and Earl she deserved a bit of happiness; and who am I to deprive her of it?

"The only reason I miss Mum is because I just wish that for once something could be normal but the reality of the situation is I'm living with my aunty who is also the Head teacher… but I'm having the best time of my life" Rachel who had been staring at a spot on the floor to try and stop her tears from falling suddenly jerked her head upwards until she met Phil's gaze. Surely he can't mean that; why would he want to live with me?

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	95. Chapter 95

Part 95

"Err Kim can I have a word please?" Steph asked in her normal style which immediately drew Kim's attention to her. Kim sprung around interested as to what Steph would want with her however she had a pretty good guess. Why can't she just accept that Andrew is at another school and I'm not going to beg him to come here because he is head teacher at Forest Mount something that I know wouldn't be on offer here. So Matt was unsure as to Kim's reasons to roll her eyes however he noticewd it nevertheless. It seems as though this conversation is going to go fantastically then. This is when I'm starting to think that it would have been a better idea to question her on this grand plan.

Tom looked at Davina as the colour was beginning to slowly return to her face however this didn't comfort him enough to remove his hand from supporting her. I wonder what is wrong with her; I hope that she isn't seriously ill because I know that I wouldn't be able to cope if I lost her…ok maybe a bit dramatic as we don't know that anything is wrong with her yet...but that hasn't happened before so of course I'm going to be worried. Perhaps I could ask her she might know something or at least be able to shred some light on the issue.

"Davina…" Immediately she stopped moving text-books from one side of the class room to the other and prepared for the inquisition that she expected to face. I know that I should tell him but I can't so it will be easier if I don't say anything as he doesn't deserve any more heartbreak as he is a good man.

Rachel looked back at Phil almost as if she was unable to comprehend what he had just said; I know that his mum wasn't much of a mum to him but I never thought that he felt so strongly about it…the only problem is it doesn't explain why he is so reserved surely he should be trying to engage with other people his age but other than Bolton's group of friends I don't think he talks to anyone and I'd say that was due to Bolton feeling that he owes me a favour as he believes I have made a massive impact on his life; obviously I hadn't I just gave him the confidence to believe in himself. So I guess that letting Phil go to this party is a good idea but I can't help be concerned that something is going to happen.

I wonder if he would appreciate the idea because he did say that he was missing his mum and there is no way that I could replace her so I'm going to have to push my feelings to one side and put his interests first.

"Phil; I've been thinking; we could try and get in contact with your mum" Although we all know that she doesn't deserve that title any more. Phil's face instantly dropped; great she is trying to get rid of me; I suppose it would be annoying having me around as I'm not the most sociable of lads but I thought we were managing.

"Steph; you can go mad and have several if you want" Kim replied with the fake smile that was plastered on her face hiding the sarcasm that the comment was dripping in. Whether it was the fact that Steph was excited about her questions to follow or she chose not to rise to the bait; Steph gave the impression that she failed to spot the sarcasm and the exasperated tone that was used by Kim. Standing next to Steph Matt was rapidly trying to attract Steph's attention as he was shaking his head trying to persuade Steph to stop while she was ahead however she was insistent that she knew best therefore she continued regardless. I know that Matt is trying to look out for me but I can handle it. I'm tougher than I look; I have to be.

"Do you know what is wrong with you" Tom asked to the point hoping that the direct question would throw her and she would provide some much needed answers however the answers she did know would neither comfort nor support one another; therefore it is less painful to feign ignorance isn't it? "No Tom I don't know but it's probably a combination of issues; not getting enough sleep; not eating enough and…"Davina paused realising that she didn't actually have another answer and decided that she could try and lighten the somewhat sombre mood, "it was also the thought of having to leave my handsome husband who I love with all my heart" Davina replied as she looked into Tom's eyes so he could see the sincerity in the last comment; however she could also see what he wasn't convinced. I can't help feeling that she knows something but she is too afraid to tell me, but we would tackle it together; surely she knows that I will support her whatever the problem is.

Once more Phil was struggling to contain his tears feeling hurt that another person he had grown to love and rely on was going to discard him and his feelings. I never thought that Rachel would do that particularly after she saw the effects of when mum did it; but then they are sisters so they are going to be similar. Phil wanted to hit himself and probably would have if he wasn't still within the company of Rachel. How could I even think that mum and Rachel are completely different as Rachel is caring, selfless and loyal whereas mum is…well mum is the complete opposite and she knows it because I told her on several occasions. Always receiving a clip around the ear but it was certainly worth it.

Noticing the tears that were beginning to stream down Phil's face, Rachel became to realise the way her words had been interpreted by the young man in front of her. No; surely he doesn't think I meant that because he couldn't be more wrong I would never try and get Phil to leave. But how can I make him understand that because it shows by this reaction how much damage Melissa has done to him and for that I could kill her.


	96. Chapter 96

Part 96

"Well you know us members of staff care about our colleagues" Steph waved her head about gesturing to the empty seats that filled the staffroom almost as if she believed they were filled with bodies that were supporting Steph in her current quest. Kim looked sceptical at Steph questioning where the blonde woman was going with her comments; well she is dressing the issue up a bit if she is going to ask about Andrew normally she just comes straight out and says it. Perhaps she thinks that I will give her more information if she tries to be caring, however I have news for her I won't. Kim noticed that there was a pause of anticipation as Steph waited to plunge the topic of conversation in unknown territory. However Kim was getting impatient almost annoyed; I can't believe that they are pretending so much just to try and find out about my love life. Why are they so bothered it's not even as if Matt knows Andrew but then Matt does whatever Steph tells him to so he is probably just following her lead but I wish they would hurry up because I could kill for a drink…actually that isn't a bad thought and it appears that these two are in the way. What a shame…I suppose their not that bad really as somewhere beneath all the gossip they are both extremely loyal and caring; that was shown through the Earl Kelly incident.

"No Phil I didn't mean it to sound like that; you are welcome to stay at my house for as long as you want because you are the only family that I have and if I have you then I don't need any of the others because I will have someone who is honest and tells the truth…although sometimes too much as you didn't need to be that brutally honest about my clothes" The pair of them laughed as they reflected upon memories that the pair of them knew they would treasure.

Phil ducked his head wondering whether this was a criticism of him something that he had received as often as he did when he was living with Melissa and begrudgingly he admitted that Rachel's criticism of him was justified and the punishments were definitely fair. That's just one of the reasons why I love living with Rachel; although she perhaps needs to switch off from being a head teacher quicker when she gets home but that's her character coming through and I wouldn't change it for the world.

"Phil honestly your opinion was valued it was a lot more co-operative than Eddie's…" Rachel paused realising the slip of her tongue. I shouldn't have said that because at the moment even Phil doesn't know about us. Phillip couldn't help the surprised expression that adorned his face with Rachel's comment. Oh that explains a lot then…I guess Eddie is the person I have to thank for making Rachel so happy then.

Phil decided to try and extract as much information from Rachel as he was going to get. "So why would Edd… had passed an opinion?" Phil asked with a smile and the wry smile which was replicated on Rachel's face made Phil's smile to stretch wider as he had something that he had always longed for and only recently received…a loving family.

With a smile on her face, Rachel replied, "Phil, you're worse than Miss Haydock…" Rachel paused determining whether she should tell Phil about Eddie. There are for's and against's but he does deserve to know despite it being early days in our relationship but I know that I can tell Phil as I trust him.

"Well me and Mr. Lawson…Eddie are…"Rachel paused with the colour starting to rise in her cheeks, finding it hard to tell Phil as despite him being family she wasn't used to letting anyone else behind the barriers which Eddie had already by-passed.

"Rachel its ok" Phil said to try and relieve the embarrassment that she felt; I know that she was prepared to tell me which is something totally different to what Mum would have done because she would say that it isn't any of my business and I should appreciate that I have no idea what it is like to be her as I will never be like her as I always get in the way so I don't deserve to know.


	97. Chapter 97

Part 97

"I'm happy for you…honestly I am because if anyone deserves to be happy it is you. As you took me in when no-body else wanted me" Phil noticed the concerned expression from Rachel on realisation as to his last comment. I hope he doesn't feel unloved because I wasn't loved throughout my childhood and it still hurts so I would hate to think that Phil feels like that as I vowed to do my best with him. However before Rachel was able to comment Phil had continued talking, "You have been like a mother to me; much better than the person who biologically owns that title. Rachel can I ask you something" Phillip asked and ducked his head in embarrassment wishing that he had never started this conversation as this wasn't something that he was comfortable with as he had already talked about his feelings which he didn't like however now he had started to beginning to ask a question that he had no idea how he was going to end it.

Rachel looked at Phil in anticipation. I wonder what he is going to ask me because it almost sounded serious so I can't imagine what he could be asking. Rachel looked quizzical and Phil knew that he had to ask the question which he has started.

"And how it isn't very fair to be kept in the dark about things especially when it has an impact on all of our lives" Steph continued hoping that the conversation would go how she had already foreseen it in her own mind. Before Kim was able to respond Steph had continued in her argument trying to make it so watertight that Kim would feel complied to agree and serve the purpose that Steph had earmarked her for.

"Rachel; well I just wonder why you have never had children" Phil asked and the bluntness of the question stunned Rachel into silence which caused Phil to think that he had to elaborate further. "I'm sorry Rachel I know that I shouldn't have asked but I'm just confused because someone like mum who doesn't deserve to be a mum is one whereas you…"Phil paused struggling to hold back the tears seeing the hurt expression on Rachel's face following his question. I never thought that I would have caused this reaction from Rachel. I should have known better perhaps mum is right and I'm stupid to thinking about other people's feeling. How could I be so stupid and why did I want to hurt Rachel; it's not even as though I can get Eddie to comfort Rachel because he is teaching so it looks as though I had better sort the situation out. The silence only served to confuse the pair of them further as they didn't quite understand the way that the conversation was going to progress.

"And you who would be a brilliant mother has never been given the chance because I know that my time living with you have been happier and more family like than the entire time that I spent with mum…". Rachel looked up at the loss of Phil's voice as she was aware that his explanation hadn't exactly finished instead it ended abruptly therefore Rachel realised that Phil must have been dealing with as many emotions as Rachel so the only way that she could resolve their suffering would be to answer Phil original question. Because Phil is the only family that I have and I don't want to spoil the ever-blossoming from between the pair of us.

"Well…" Rachel paused feeling her voice stuck at the back of her throat feeling herself overcome with emotion. Come on Rachel I know this is a hard question to answer but someone was going to ask it sooner or later and Phil is family so he does deserve to know however I thought that Melissa would have told him because it's not as though he would have been too young but then he never met the pair of them because we weren't particularly on very good terms. Rachel took a deep breath trying her best to keep her emotions in check and prepared to tell Phil one of Rachel's secrets from her illustrious past.


	98. Chapter 98

Part 98

"Ok Phil; I'm going to tell you something that not many other people know". Rachel said as she took another deep breath hoping that she would be able to prepare herself for the confession which she was going to admit. Phil looked at her confused still wondering why such a question would have created this sort of reaction from Rachel. If I didn't know better I would have thought that she had a child...but surely she can't because I would have heard…mum would have known and told me; after all they would be my cousin.

Rachel decided that although she didn't want to tell Phillip she hadn't actually got a lot of choice. Well I don't think that it will be at all easy to tell him as it's not something that I like to reflect upon and I must admit that despite it constantly being in the back of my mind I wouldn't have ever considered that I would be telling the third person in less than a year especially when I have kept it a secret for 6 years.

"Are you sure that you are well enough to work?" Tom asked Davina despite her continued insistence that she was 'fine'. "Yes for the umpteen time I am fine although if you keep asking me you won't be because I will have strangled you to stop you asking me" Davina replied with an expression that told Tom she was joking however the tone of her voice used showed that she was getting sick of hearing his concerns about her. Surely she isn't upset that I want to look after her because I can't help feeling that I let other people down and I'm certain that I'm not going to let the same thing happen to Davina.

Therefore Tom was determined that he wasn't going to let this go that easily as he couldn't imagine why she would have suddenly have lost her balance before and looked incredibly pale. "Have you got any idea why it happened?" Tom asking hoping that his persistence would pay off and he would be rewarded with the answers that he required however Davina was even more unimpressed. "No Tom I have told you before I don't know why it happened!" she replied with a raised voice hoping that he would gather she was annoyed with him and end the conversation however Tom decided that he wasn't finished yet as he still hadn't found anything out.

"I'm sorry Steph what are you talking about?" Kim asked the blonde haired woman getting confused at the way that the conversation was going. I thought that she was trying to imply about my relationship with Andrew but I don't understand why Steph would have any interest in my relationship and I don't understand why it concerns her.

Steph smiled back at Kim noticing the look of confusion on her face, sensing the chance to obtain more gossip Steph replied, "what do you think that I'm talking about?" Matt looked at the blonde haired woman with a doubtful expression on his face. And this is the master-plan then. I really think that my idea would have been better but then at this rate it will take so long for Steph's plan to be put into action that they will have already got married before we find out that they are together.

However Kim was starting to get quite agitated with the line of enquiry. Normally Steph is straight to the point so why does she choose the one time that I can't be bothered with her as I have a thumping headache to be cryptic.

I reckon the best way to tell him will be bluntly because despite it being a shock to him it will mean that I will actually tell him but if I try and tell him delicately it will result in him interrupting me and then I won't end up telling him and he does actually deserve to know…I just wonder why Melissa wouldn't have told him before. "I have had a child before" Rachel exclaimed and the water that Phil had just drank from nearly caused him to choke. What…I thought that Rachel said she had a child surely I must be hearing her wrong. Feeling the need to clarify the issue Phil looked back at Rachel and saw the glazed over expression as she reminisced the memories that she held with her daughter.


	99. Chapter 99

Part 99

If I wasn't confused before I defiantly am now. Phil looked at Rachel hoping that he had heard her wrong but the distant expression on his face told him that he was divulging into one of Rachel's biggest secrets something that worried Phil. Not because of the way that his opinion might change but the way that he knew he wasn't very good at comforting other people and I would hate Rachel to be upset but I can't do anything because I'm useless at it. I guess that is what happens when I live with Mum for all my life who never showed me any love or feelings. Phil was relieved that Rachel continued talking as she felt that telling someone about her daughter would help ease the pain that Rachel felt and it might enable Phil to understand why Rachel had so many barriers and bars around her heart.

"It was 6 years ago and I was in a happy relationship with a man called Adam; he was an fireman and I must admit that I was truly happy with him…" Rachel paused as she was smiling reflecting upon memories that had passed her by in an instant.

The staff room was suddenly illuminated by artificial light as the dark clouds which had began to gather around the school caused the darkened…almost colder atmosphere to surround the people within the brick walls; causing a inquisitive hand to switch the light switch on; hoping that the increased light would spread knowledge onto the particular topic. The grey building opposite the school were lost in the murk almost as if they had been rubbed from an artist's pictured deemed not necessary any more.

"I'm sorry Steph but I have no idea what you are talking about as you have just completely lost me so why don't you just tell me and stop all the games as I actually have something to do" Kim replied and Steph could tell that her attention was waning. I had better ask her soon then because she doesn't seem in the best mood as it is.

"Ok; well have you noticed over the last few weeks that Rachel and Eddie seem to be getting closer again" Steph asked with the anticipation showing clearly on her face due to the huge smile that was plastered on her face however the blank expression on Kim's face surprised her. Surely Kim isn't trying to tell me that she hasn't noticed because surely it is rather obvious but it looks as though I'm going to have to carry on regardless.

Kim shook her head not knowing where this conversation was going; "No Steph I can't say that I have noticed" Kim remarked which caused shocked expressions to be passed between both Steph and Matt. How could someone not be interested in someone else's life because surely it makes your own life more interesting if you view other people's lives?

Rachel rubbed her upper arm which Phil instantly noticed; admittedly it has gone colder but I wonder if it is out of a desire to be comfort rather than for the production of any heat. However Phillip was almost relieved by the fleeting, unplanned pause in the conversation; it allowed Phil to take in environment which had rapidly changed since his arrival in the head teacher's office 15 minutes ago; for one the dark clouds were attacking the once clear sky almost showing the total change in atmosphere both inside and out the four walls following Phil's arrival.

"So you haven't got any idea as to why it would have happened" Tom continued to pressure Davina for an answer and despite the darkened room Tom could sense her displeasure with him. I think that this will probably put me in her bad books but there's not a lot I can do as I'm honestly concerned about her.

"If I tell you, will you stop pestering me about it?" Davina asked and waited for Tom's reply, therefore begrudgingly Tom nodded having no intention of ignoring it if it was something serious. After all I'm doing it for her own good. "I didn't have any breakfast this morning because I was in a rush as I had not finished marking all the essays…" Davina paused when she saw Tom roll his eyes. Noticing the look of anger that was directed his way with his reaction to Davina's last comment he felt that he had to try and justify it. "Love, you shouldn't worry about it if you can't mark them all in time mark some the next day and give the essays back to the pupils a day late…because I'm sure that they aren't going to mind too much" Tom replied thinking that this was a helpful comment however the disgusted expression on Davina's face told him that this was anything other than helpful.

Phil looked at Rachel completely bewildered by the situation that he found himself in. I wonder why I have never been told this before because surely I would have been told because after all I would have been eleven…surely that is old enough to know about my cousin. I never thought that I would have found this revelation out when I asked the question…I'm almost wishing that I never asked because I'm obviously going to cause pain for Rachel. Rachel may have noticed the puzzled expression on Phil's face but the reminisce of her past made her continue the story almost as if she was having a flash back.

The lightening crashed outside causing a flash of light lifting the darkness for a split second almost as if in that second the future of the people involved was clear and uncomplicated, but as quickly as it came; the light retreated once again almost afraid to venture into the unknown…similarly to the people in the darkened building.


	100. Chapter 100

Part 100

"Tom that is hardly fair we wouldn't be impressed if the pupils didn't hand the essay in on time so it is hardly professional if we can't mark them in time" Davina replied and Tom smiled at her comment loving the passion that she spoke with. That is exactly why I knew that she would make a brilliant teacher. However Davina interrupted the smile as she thought that Tom was being sarcastic towards her. Great; now he thinks that I'm a bad teacher as well; isn't it nice to think that you can rely on the people you love can't you…well I can't, with the people around me and the trouble is I need them now more than ever…although he doesn't know about that and if I get my way it will be a while yet until he does.

"Oh so you don't want to do a Grantly then and not hand the essays back at all then?" Tom joked which was met by a stonily silence and a glare from Davina. She really isn't happy today is she?

"No of course I don't, why would I want to teach like him when I had to endure two years of seeing pupils under-achieve under Grantly?" Davina asked as once more a low rumble of thunder broke the newly created uneasy silence between the pair of them. I can't say anything without her taking offence to it; what am I meant to do…if I don't say anything she questions why I am silent; as she did this morning, and if I speak I still can't win. What's a man suppose to do?

The pair of them who were suppose to be in love especially after only being married a couple of months they seemed to do nothing other than fight. This is pointless and I can't be bothered with it any more; I might meet up with some mates and go to the pub tonight leaving her to get over her mood.

Steph continued to look at Kim with her eyes wide open amazed that her colleague had missed something that Steph and Matt often commented on or speculated about. I can't believe that Kim has never noticed but I hope that will only help me rather than hinder my plans.

"Oh…"Steph paused as she was still thrown not quite knowing how to continue the conversation following this shocking revelation. Kim looked amused at the woman who was never normally stuck for words floundered about not quite knowing how to continue the conversation but after lots of practice in her French lessons Steph quickly composed herself. See, although I think Rachel would disagree, there are some benefits to being a bad teacher although if only they could include gossiping into the national curriculum; Waterloo Road would immediately gain instant recognition for it; the department would be that good especially with me and Matt at the helm.

The lightening crashed and despite the light causing the temporary black out to be been lifted it didn't shred any more information for Phil to begin to understand and process the shattering information that Rachel had just provided.

"I'm sorry Rachel I don't understand" Phil exclaimed after spending recent moments with Rachel with the pair of them sitting in silence.

Rachel was snapped from her trace with the sound of Phil's voice and prepared herself for telling the whole truth to Phil; something that Rachel was convinced he had never received from Melissa. Which is why I have to tell him the truth; however hard it is.

"Well me and Matt have noticed it however obviously the pair of them will never admit it…" Steph took another breath delaying the part of the conversation where she would disclose the vital part of information that she had been building up to. The quizzical expression on Kim's face did nothing to comfort Steph as she was obviously not impressed with the way that the conversation was going. I think I'm just going to have to suggest it because after all what is the worst that can happen?

"Well I was wondering if you would have a word with Phil to see if you can find anything out about Rachel and Eddie?" Steph suggested and Kim raised her eyes from the floor to see two child-like grins that were aimed in her direction.

"We had been child-hood friends; only we lost contact once we grew up and we went separate ways however one evening when we were both out in town we met up and I guess that the attraction started there" Rachel reminisced as the smile was etched on her face almost as if she reflecting upon something rather than telling a story of her past to her nephew that she had grew to love.


	101. Chapter 101

Part 101

"We were both happy in the relationship and then he asked me to marry him; needless to say there was no decision to make and I instantly accepted the proposal. Thrilled that despite all the troubles I had had in my life I was lucky enough to be wanted by Adam. Obviously I wasn't convinced that it was what he wanted but somehow he preserved and got through the stubborn side of me and I had come to accept that for once my life was going right" Rachel paused and laughed ironically at the way that it turned out in the end; how very wrong.

Phil looked at Rachel with concern in his eyes at the way that Rachel had been transported back to a time which although she reflected upon it obviously also brought her grief because of the way that she isn't bitter about what happened; giving the impression that he didn't cheat on her.

Kim looked at Steph horrified; how could Steph suggest something so preposterous. Why would I want to use Phil like that; because he would never come to me ever again if I did therefore any problems that he may face may go undetected.

"Steph!" Kim called showing instant displeasure in the task that Steph seemed to believe was perfectly acceptable. "What?" the blonde woman asked innocently almost as if she could see no issue with the request that she had devised.

"So it was all planned and we were going to get married in the summer; as I have never particularly enjoyed the winter; so we agreed that we would have a quiet ceremony with family and friends…surprisingly my family was coming as Adam had insisted that I should ask them because although kicking me out on the streets when I was younger was unforgivable I would never be able to forgive myself if I hadn't given them the option to come to the wedding…put the ball back in their court as he put it. Can't you tell that he played tennis". Rachel said and once more slipped back into the trance that Phil was beginning to get used to. Although I sort of like seeing her a trance because she looks happy; something that she deserves to be…I just hope that she lets Eddie make her happy. But I wonder what happened because if she was so happy why would it just suddenly have turned so sour.

"Rachel, I've been thinking, at the wedding…"Adam paused as he wasn't quite sure how he should continue the conversation due to the way Rachel had already expressed her opinion on it. But I don't think that she will forgive herself if she doesn't have any of her family there so I think that it wouldn't be a good day because if she gives them the choice it is there option as to whether they will come.

Rachel looked at Adam worried; I wonder if he is having second thoughts I always thought that he would be too good for me and I right as he is obviously calling the entire thing off. Adam saw the worried expression on Rachel's face and he stretched out a hand grasping her small hand within his as he encased his larger, rougher hand around it.

"Surely you know that I can't ask Phil to answer that question" Kim replied to Steph and the smile that she had on her face was changed into a frown. Why not it's not as though it will cause him any harm is it?

The blonde woman smiled back at Kim hoping that she would be able to use her persuasive charm and encourage her to agree to the fool-proof plan which she had spent the entire year 10 French lesson creating.

"Yes you can it is relatively easy in fact" Steph replied and although she knew it was relatively pointless Kim glanced at Matt hoping that for once he was disagreeing with his friend and believing that this was a very bad idea however the excitable grin on his face told Kim that this person's thoughts were the exact same as any other times that he had to make a decision between Steph or another person. Needless to say I haven't got any more support so it is two against one, but I have a strong will-power so I'm certainly not going to back down because I know that I am right about this.

Rachel stretched out her hand and took some thin air and clutched it almost as if she let go o the vice like grip she had on it that it would slip through her fingers and she would never get to feel this emotions again. I know I said that I was happy for her but I almost starting to become worried because surely this isn't normal.

"Look Davina, I was only worried about you but I won't bother anymore because I don't know what I have done wrong this time but it is obviously something so don't bother cooking anything for me tonight because I won't be there" Tom replied and stormed off down the corridor banging the doors against the wall causing the paint-work to flake off and the slamming the doors on his passing. The tears started to build up in her eyes as she watched the man she loved stamping down the corridor annoyed at something she had done. I honestly don't know what is the matter with me but I feel all over the place and I seem to be taking it out on Tom; perhaps it's because you take all your emotions out on the people that you love however it doesn't comfort Tom as it seems like I am unfairly targeting him for criticism.

"Davina?" A woman called her name seeing the shaking form of the woman in front of her. I wonder what is wrong with her?


	102. Chapter 102

Part 102

Come on Adam; it's Rachel the woman that you love surely you can do this as if she doesn't agree then we can promise never to mention it again. Think how guilty you will feel on our wedding day when none of Rachel's family are there and the look of sadness in Rachel's eyes although she will use the fake smile; that I can spot from a mile away. "Well I've been thinking and I thought that you could try and contact your family and invite them to the wedding" the stunned silence in the room followed Rachel's shocked expression. Well that was something that I didn't expect I must be honest; surely I don't want them there do I not after everything that they did to me?

Rachel was confused therefore Adam decided that he should try to persuade Rachel further, "if you don't have them there you will regret it because your wedding day is the biggest day of your life and if they aren't there I know that it will hurt you" Rachel did a wry smile knowing that Adam had got her feelings pretty accurately; and I always thought that I guarded my feelings and emotions quite well. But what if they don't want to come? Perhaps Adam will be able to provide an answer for that.

"What happens if they don't come" Rachel asked with apprehension almost as if she knew that this was the more likely option out of them all. Adam smiled; how did I know that she was going to ask this question? It's a good job that I have already prepared an answer.

"Well if they don't come it is their choice but as you have asked them you will have put the ball back in their court" Adam replied and Rachel smiled knowing that honestly she would quite like a reconciliation with her family.

The woman had reached Davina and pulled her into her embrace hoping that she would be able to offer some comfort to the clearly distressed woman. "Can you tell me what the matter is?" Jasmine asked Davina as she led her into the classroom which was opposite the pair of them. If this is what being married does to you then I have already decided that I don't ever want to get married. The tears began to roll down Davina's cheeks knowing that she the situation she faced was completely her doing. How stupid am I; I'm meant to love Tom but all we seem to do is argue.

"I would love to be able to tell but the truth is I don't think I can because I honestly don't know what the matter is although I seem to be taking it out on Tom which has annoyed him so we have just had a massive argument" Davina admitted and instantly Jasmine felt sorry for her as she knew the love that her friend felt for Tom.

Rachel reminisce had concluded therefore she continued in telling Phil the events which were still very confusing for the sixteen year old lad. "So although it was really early we were making plans for the wedding which at this stage was in 7 months time" Rachel smiled at Phil as she knew that when she was describing this part in her life it was one of the happiest that she had ever been. Phil returned the smile as he could see the passion that Rachel spoke with showing the love that she felt for Adam…but I wonder what happened?

Rachel paused knowing that this next part of the story was going to be the hardest part of the entire thing as there was much happiness to follow.

"Look you two; I'm not going to ask Phil about Rachel and Eddie because if…and I mean if; they have a relationship because it has nothing to do with pastoral care therefore I'm not going to do it; as it would be an abuse of power to claim that it had anything to do with pastoral care" Kim responded to the pair of them until their smiles vanished from their faces knowing that they had been beaten as there was no way that Kim was going to agree to ask Phil. Why can't she do anything to help somebody else; she is so selfish. However Steph had a moment of inspiration; I just hope that Matt agrees me.

"Oh come on Kim; I would do it if I was Head of Pastoral care" Steph replied hoping that she was able to try and convince Kim into agreeing by making her feel guilty however the answer that she received told her that this wasn't any more successful than the previous attempt.

"Well maybe that explains why I'm Head of Pastoral care and you're not then" Kim replied with a smile on her face knowing that this would be an end to the conversation however she didn't anticipate Steph's persistence partly because she was annoyed at Kim's recent answer. It was unnecessary as there was no need for it.

"How about, if I said it did have something to do with Pastoral Care". Steph tried hoping that she would be able to convince Kim into helping.

"Look Steph unless there are some concerns over Phil's behaviour then I don't want to know because it isn't any of my business". Kim replied hoping that this would be the end of the conversation.


	103. Chapter 103

Part 103

"We were going to get married when I found out that I was pregnant with our first child" Rachel smiled at the memory and the joy that it brought to the pair of their lives.

The front door opened and immediately Rachel felt nervous; I wonder what he will feel about it because I know that I won't be able to do it on my own because I will need help. The smile which initially stretched across Adam's face when he saw Rachel sitting on the sofa soon vanished due to the worried expression that Rachel had on her face. Adam looked concerned at Rachel and immediately began to find out the problem; surely she should be happy it is Friday so we will have the whole weekend with one another and in 7 months we are going to get married and it will be the happiest day in my life because I will consider myself to be the luckiest man on Earth.

"Rachel what's the matter?" Adam asked as he sat down beside Rachel taking both of her hands inside his and giving the a gentle squeeze hoping that she would feel comfortable around him so she would be able to explain her fears to him.

"Um…"Rachel paused as she had ducked her head and was staring at the floor trying her best to avoid eye-contact with Adam. Hmm, I wonder what the problem is because this is a very unusual reaction from her. Adam transferred Rachel's hands into his left hand enabling him to free his right hand from the entwining of their fingers.

He gently placed his right hand under Rachel's chin and gently lifted it upwards until their eyes met with one another and started the attraction that was undeniable.

Davina winced and immediately Jasmine looked concerned at her friend as she rubbed her right shoulder obviously showing some discomfort. "Davina are you ok because you look awfully pale" Jasmine said as she looked the now ill-looking Davina and started to wonder whether her argument with Tom was affecting Davina more than she cared to express.

Davina was thinking as to how she could have hurt her shoulder and she honestly didn't know therefore to provide an answer for Jasmine's curious expression as to how she hurt her shoulder she replied, "I walked into the door last evening" which she thought seemed rather plausible however Jasmine wasn't impressed. Isn't that the excuse when people get hit by their husbands…but surely not Tom; as I never thought that he was like that but I will certainly give him a piece of my mind as he won't be brave enough to hit me.

Confident that Rachel was going to slip her gaze back to the floor, Adam removed his hand from underneath her chin and moved his hand to remove the tear tracks that were starting to form on his fiancée's face. I'm starting to worry now because this is unlike Rachel to show any emotion at all even in front of me. Rachel smiled at the caring gesture from Adam and decided that she hadn't got a lot of choice but to tell him the issue.

"Come on Rachel; what ever it is I promise that we will get through it together as I will support you". Adam exclaimed as he looked deep into Rachel's eyes hoping that he would be able to penetrate her thoughts and help her through the problem.

"Ok..."I hope he means that because I will certainly need the help from him. "Well there's no easy way of telling you this so I'm going to just come out and say it" Rachel replied and turned to face Adam who now looked very inquisitive.


	104. Chapter 104

Part 104

"I'm pregnant" Rachel said and there was silence in the room as neither of them knew what else there was to say and the pair of them had to digest Rachel's recent revelation as even Rachel hadn't quite accepted the concept of her being pregnant yet.

"Are you sure?" Adam said almost to signify that he had understood what Rachel had said, but to give him more time to think of the implications for the pair of them. That is brilliant news but I wonder what Rachel thinks about it because she certainly doesn't look very pleased at the moment.

Jasmine marched down the corridors intent on finding Tom and questioning his behaviour towards Davina. I'm going to stick up for Davina because I'm not going to let Tom get away with hurting her.

Well it seems as though I will have to be clever then, I just hope that Matt can understand what I'm doing and agrees with me. "You see Kim; then I think that it is your business because Matt noticed a difference in Phil" which caused both Kim and Steph to look at him and immediately he felt under pressure before he was able to stop himself he had replied, "have I?". Kim glared at Steph unable to believe that she would stoop so low to try and find out information that was so irrelevant.

Needless it say, Steph wasn't impressed with Matt; why can't he ever use his brain does he have to insist on wrecking everything; lets see if I can savage the situation that Matt has created for the pair of us.

"Yes surely you haven't forgotten Matt, you're memory is really bad these days…I thought it was only so bad after a few drinks but you are starting to disprove that theory" Steph replied trying to make a pointed comment to Matt hoping that he would understand what Steph was trying to get him to do.

However Kim had already seen through the plan, "sorry Steph but I'm not going to do it as Rachel's and Eddie's private life is exactly that…private" Kim responded hoping that this would bring the conversation to an end, especially when she started walking to the door relieved that the interrogation was over; only to be met with the sound of Steph's voice again, "so you admit that there is a Rachel and Eddie private life then". Well she is certainly persistent I will give her that.

The bell rang for the start of the lesson and begrudgingly Davina had to confirm that she had a lesson therefore with a final embrace from Jasmine, Davina had composed herself and Jasmine left when the first pupil started to encroach upon the classroom which the two women had been discussing their problems in for the last 20 minutes. Well at least I will be able to give Tom a piece of my mind as I'm not impressed with what I have just heard.

Rachel silently nodded hoping that this wasn't a way to say that this was something that he didn't want. Because I don't want to leave Adam because I love him but there is no way that I'm giving up my unborn child. The beaming smile on Adam's face told Rachel that all her concerns were unnecessary. Why did I need to worry because if that reaction was anything to go by then there was nothing to worry about?

"Rachel that is great news!" Adam exclaimed as he held out his arms hoping that Rachel would accept his embrace and the pair…three of them would become the family that they had always craved.

Rachel readily accepted the embrace and she rested her head in the crook of his neck both enjoying the comfort that they received from one another and content about the way that their lives were heading.

"Well Matt you were incredible helpful then weren't you?" Steph asked sarcastically towards Matt who looked very shamefaced at her. It wasn't my fault if she told me the plan then I would have been able to help but she didn't and she expects me to know what she is on about.

"Well I'm sorry Steph but it's not my fault that you are confusing and try to get me to understand your way of thinking" Matt responded as he glared at Steph unaware as to how Steph could blame him for the situation that they were in.

"You can't blame me for you not understand obvious plans" Steph retorted hoping that the pair of them wouldn't fall out but was insistent that she wasn't going to back down. I'm stubborn like that you see. Matt shuffled up on the sofa until he was into the corner and to increase the distance between them even further Matt turned away from Steph hoping that she would get the message that he didn't want to talk to her and leave him alone.


	105. Chapter 105

Part 105

Rachel slipped out of the trance and smiled at Phil as she realised that she wasn't alone in her office reflecting upon times gone by like previous times but instead she was in the company of her nephew explaining secrets of her life which he was none the wiser about.

"So we were both thrilled about the prospect of the pair of us having a child together however it did mean that we delayed the wedding even further because although I would have initially have liked to get married before the child was born it wasn't practical for me to be walking up the aisle eight months pregnant". Rachel explained to Phil who although Rachel was explaining the past well he was starting to get extremely confused. If they were so happy with one another why didn't the relationship work out?

Walking along the corridor Jasmine heard the voice of the man that she was searching for. Just typical I should have known that he was here; this should have been the first place that I looked. Jasmine slammed open the canteen door and when it crashed into the wall it caused a commotion; which caused the person in question to turn and face the sudden arrival with a massive smile on his face…however he wasn't alone. Why is he talking to her when he should be discussing the problems he has with his wife…my friend someone who I'm not going to let get hurt because of him.

"Oooh, mind the paint work" Tom's companion called to Jasmine who had just worked through the door glaring at the two people in front of her. How can I speak to him civilly when I know what he has done to Davina?

Steph sighed knowing that she had been harsh to her best friend and without him she wouldn't have anyone to gossip with. "Matt I'm sorry" Steph said in a child-like voice as she shuffled closer to Matt hoping that he would forgive her. Matt who was unable to stay annoyed at Steph for very long smiled back at her showing that the falling out between the pair of them was over. I can't be annoyed at her because life is a lot more interesting with her in it. Perhaps if I told her my plans it would stop her thinking that I'm useless.

"Well I have got an idea though" Matt replied hoping that for once Steph would give him the opportunity to express his thoughts and ideas and perhaps for once she would allow Matt to put his thoughts into practice. Steph looked intrigued at Matt which caused his heart to soar. It seems as though Steph actually wants to hear what I have to say…which is unusual as normally I have to just accept her decisions although sometimes I don't believe that they are very practical.

"So rather than planning for a wedding we put all our efforts into planning for our baby; which we were both hugely excited about…I was slightly nervous but at every opportunity Adam continued to reassure me that we would be brilliant parents; obviously I knew that he would be but I wasn't sure what I had to offer a child" Rachel started to explain and with each little bit of the story being revealed Phillip got increasingly confused, I don't understand why it would have gone so wrong. Phil looked at Rachel with the anticipation being shown clearly on his face willing for her to continue the intriguing story.

"In all the excitement the nine months came extremely quickly and despite me being excited it was blatantly obvious that the pair of us were starting to be incredibly nervous when we realised the weight of expectation that would be upon us when we had someone else to look after". Rachel exclaimed as her eyes glazed over almost as though she was fighting the tears; determined not to show them in front of her nephew. This is certainly going to be the hardest part of the story now though.


	106. Chapter 106

Part 106

"Tom can I have a word…in private" Jasmine said sharply and had to hold a small back from spreading across her face with the worried expression that spread across Tom's face on hearing the sharp tone that Jasmine used. Tom turned to Rose and smiled apologetically at her as he walked towards the door which was currently swinging upon its hinge. Jasmine walked through the door but declined the opportunity to hold it for Tom causing the door to hit into him.

"But it happened ever so quickly…" Rachel explained and immediately got lost in one of the memories that she had relived many times in the past six years. "Adam..." Rachel called up the stairs as she clung onto the work-surface in the kitchen trying to practice her breathing techniques which she had, had drilled into her during all the pre-natal classes that she went to…and hated.

"Rach; I'll be down soon I'm just moving some of the books about and will probably put them in the attic in a couple of minutes" Adam replied hoping that Rachel was sitting down on the sofa with the cup of tea that he had made for her prior to his departure upstairs.

"Somehow I doubt it" Rachel mumbled as she breathed through the pain once more, "Sorry darling I didn't hear that; what did you say?" Adam replied as he walked towards the top of the stairs hoping that this would stop Rachel's voice being so distorted. I wonder what is wrong with her because I thought that she would be pleased that I'm moving the boxes because she has been nagging me to do it for ages.

"Well if you asked Rachel and I asked Eddie we will be able to compare their answers and see if they match up…if they don't we know that something is happening so we know that something is happening between the pair of them and by continuing to pressure them we will be able to extract more information from the pair of them". Matt concluded hoping that Steph would agree that this was a good idea and in Matt's opinion he was surprised that she did.

"That is a very good idea, why didn't you tell me earlier" Steph asks towards a baffled Matt who was unable to believe that Steph had said that it was a good idea. I didn't think Steph knew that term when it was one of my ideas.

"Is everything ok?" Tom asked Davina as he still hadn't realised that Jasmine was annoyed at him; something has probably happened with Grantly and she is taking it out on the rest of us like she normally does; so I wonder what she is moaning at me for now and I have to be polite because she is Davina's friend…perhaps Jasmine will know what is wrong with Davina.

Jasmine looked back at Tom bewildered; how can he not know what is the matter…surely he knows that she would have told me and now I see him in the canteen flirting with Rose; he hasn't even been married a year yet!

"No it isn't" Jasmine retorted ensuring that Tom was feeling as uncomfortable as it was physically possible for her to make him. Before Tom was able to respond Jasmine had replied, "I know" which caused Tom to look crestfallen almost as if he couldn't believe that Davina would rather talk to someone else. I guess she would talk to anyone as long as it wasn't: as she only wants to argue with me; which I what I guess Jasmine must be moaning at me for doesn't she realise that I didn't want to have a argument with Davina any more than she did with me.

"Adam is there any chance that you can leave the boxes because I need you here" Rachel called up the stairs from her position in the kitchen with the panic that she was feeling showing in her voice. Adam looked exasperated; why is it the minute that you are doing the job that they have nagged you to do for the entire week they interrupt you. Woman who would have them! Adam smiled; although I can't complain too much because I have a beautiful fiancée and we are having a child together who if they are anything like Rachel, I will be the luckiest man alive…I hope nothing is wrong with the baby as Rachel did sound rather worried.

"Yes I know that it shouldn't have happened but it's just…well it seems as though we are picking constant faults with one another. I know this went too far but I promise from the bottom of my heart that I will sort it out because I love Davina and I couldn't bear her to be hurt" Tom replied with the expression on his face showing the truth behind the words that he spoke. I love Davina so much that I promise that I'm going to sort the problem out.

Jasmine looked back at Tom disgusted; how can he say that he didn't mean to hurt her when he was the cause of the harm…if he had 'hit' her then she wouldn't be in any pain.

"Well why don't you try and sort yourself out first because then she wouldn't be hurt" Jasmine replied hoping that this would affect Tom's conscience however the blank expression on his face told her that this was either something that didn't concern him enough for it to show on his face or he didn't understand what she was talking about. Either way Jasmine believed Tom's behaviour was disgraceful; I would hate to be with a man like Tom and I feel sorry for Davina as she is married to him. She turned on her heel leaving a very confuse man in her wake; is it me or does she get stranger after each conversation.


	107. Chapter 107

Part 107

Rachel smiled back at Phil realising that this description was rather disjointed but she was relieved that Phil wasn't pressuring her for answers because although it was causing her pain to remember in a way it was almost helping her. "Well as you can probably guess I was having the baby and when we got to hospital I held my daughter in my arms and I was filled with wonder and a surge of love for the baby in my arms…my baby".

"Rachel; she is perfect; just like you as she has your eyes. My two special girls" Adam exclaimed as he looked on the baby which was snuggled happily into Rachel's arms and wrapped his arm around Rachel pulling her into towards his chest until they looked the perfect family with Rachel holding the little baby and the loving parents gazing down at their baby with all the love and admiration in the world.

The tears began to build up in Rachel's eyes and despite the persistent blinking it wasn't doing anything to remove Rachel's tears almost as if the tears were being used as a sign for the pain that Rachel now felt for the huge gap in her life following events that were about to be revealed to Phil when Rachel concluded the story.

Phil's heart broke with the sight of his aunty and supporter crying in front on him; I wish there was something that I could do but I don't even know what happened and why everything went wrong. I wonder if Rachel is having flashbacks to the situation when she is telling me because she regularly pauses when trying to tell me. What Phil didn't know was that becoming closer to Eddie caused these feelings to be felt more as she was opening up wounds that had been closed for a very long time; and Rachel wasn't enjoying having to scratch over them again due to the deepening of the wounds which had never healed as they had been merely ignored.

Rachel stood up from the sofa and began the short journey back to her desk which was useful due to Rachel's vision being distorted by the tears that were still threatening to fall.

"Rachel!" Phil exclaimed as he looked towards the woman that he admired as she was suiting in the chair which Phil had dubbed 'the chair of power' and began ruffling papers which Rachel pretended to be focusing on. It might be a lot more convincing if she wasn't blinking so often to try and suppress the tears that were threatening to fall. If only I had Eddie's calming influence I would be able to help her but instead I feel so useless.

Rachel looked up from the 'paperwork' and waited with anticipation for the impending question from her nephew. Needless to say Rachel didn't have to wait very long for the question which was always a benefit and a hindrance to Rachel. I could have done with a bit longer to prepare because I'm still very emotional at the moment and I hate showing my emotions to other people because if you let other people see what you are feeling they know exactly what to do to hurt you.

"So then what happened?" Phil asked in the normal diplomatic system that Phil was able to deliver statements with; Rachel immediately caught eye contact with Phil almost as if his direct question had caused Rachel to suffer a physical blow. Rachel took yet another deep breath trying to convince herself that she would be able to get through the explanation to Phil holding her emotions in check. I hope I can do it because Phil is a mess anyway especially with Melissa leaving he doesn't need to see his highly emotional aunty.

Before Rachel could stop herself she had started to explanation hoping that the sooner she started the sooner it could be over and Phil might leave her alone. It's not that I don't like Phil because I do, I love him but it will mean that I don't have to hold my emotions behind my walls which are a lot lower following Eddie's attempts at getting me to open up towards other people. Doesn't he understand that this is the exact reason why I rely on my barriers?

"Emma; our daughter was now five months old and we both adorned her; we alternatively feed her and Adam was the best father and supporter that any first time mother would crave; and he decided that the three of us should go on a family holiday as being the perfectionist I am…" Rachel paused as she smiled at the memory knowing that this was one thing that Adam always used to tease her about but he said it was also one of the many things that he loved about her.


	108. Chapter 108

Part 108

"Come on Rachel it will be good for us to have a holiday" Adam begged Rachel for her to reconsider knowing that he had already booked the holiday therefore he would have to do a lot of un-booking if Rachel refused to go. Perhaps I should have checked that she wanted to come; not just booking it regardless, and Rachel isn't the easiest person to convince.

Phil looked at Rachel curious as to why there was an artificial pause in the conversation, therefore Rachel took this as her cue to proceed with the recollection of events that have shaped Rachel's life and still continue to haunt her.

"I was getting rather worried about the wedding and whether everything would be perfect. But Adam was brilliant as usual and helped by reassuring me that everything would be perfect because it was the day that we were getting married and becoming a family.

"Adam I can't there is so much to do for the wedding; I hadn't got time to go on holiday because I'm sure that we could do it another time. "Rachel, the wedding is planned as we have gone over it about a dozen times so I'm sure that we can go on this holiday because it will only be for a couple of days and then we can both go through the plans for the wedding again". Adam tried to convince Rachel and he could tell from the smile on her face that she was starting to accept his idea.

So I agreed that we needed a holiday and a week before the wedding we packed the car and began a journey down to the seaside; the theory being that Emma would love it….however we never got there" Rachel concluded and Phil looked from the position that he had gazed at on the floor for the last couple of minutes to look in Rachel's eyes to see the tears rolling down her face. I wish there was something that I could do. Over the last few weeks Phil had noticed a difference in Rachel as her eyes had been filled with a look of happiness and one that showed she was entirely happy with the decision that she made along with the way her life was progressing however when Phil currently looked at Rachel this happiness had been extinguished and her eyes only represented the hurt that Rachel felt. But there is nothing I can do because I'm useless at helping me because I never know what to say whereas Rachel will support me wherever I'm upset I just stand there feeling awkward as if I'm interrupting private thoughts from the particular person and they end up wishing that I wasn't there as I make the entire situation awkward.

Phil instantly thought that he was going to have to question Rachel further however she resumed in the explanation through the tears that Rachel was shredding. Phil stood up from the sofa and once more walked towards the 'chair of power' hoping that this would eliminate the apparent gulf between the pair of them who had started off distant but over the weeks that they had spent with one another they had blossomed in their relationship just as Phil had improved as a person. Which is all down to Rachel; although being the person she is; she will never admit that, to herself let alone anyone else.

"We were on the motorway and I turned around in the seat to see that Emma had stopped shaking her rattle as she was now sitting there contently almost as if she knew that she was going on holiday. I don't know if she really did but Adam said it had something to do with me being happy and the happy family that the three of us were; but nevertheless our daughter was the happiest that I think I had ever seen her" Rachel paused once more as she inhaled more oxygen trying to suppress the tears that were once again threatening to overcome the explanation.

Phil sat down in the nearest chair by Rachel enabling him if he wished to stretch his arms out and comfort Rachel. I would but I don't know how to do it; how do I comfort someone when I have no idea how they are feeling because I haven't ever lost anyone close to me.

"I still remember the road which it happened on… the weather conditions had worsened…it was like this actually" This instantly made the pair of them exchange glances out of the window to spot the next flash of lightening in response to the growl of thunder; for a split second the black sky was illuminated however as quickly as something was visible it went again as it feel under the dark blanket which covered the region.

"So Adam suggested that we should stop for a bit have something to eat and then continue in the journey as the weather was suppose to be better the next day and we wanted as much time for the just the three of us as we could get out of the holiday. Me and Emma gave one another quizzical expressions because although she was only 5 months old it was as if we understood one another exactly" Rachel smiled at the bitter memory of her daughter knowing that this blossoming relationship that the pair of them had was cut short all to quickly.

"Eating…is that all that you think about?" Rachel asked Adam with a wry smile on her face knowing that Adam was being practical but also not enjoying the prospect of having to delay the trip any longer. I know to being with I wasn't sure that it was a good idea but I can be certain that it is and now I don't want to waste any more time in getting there as I just want to get there so the holiday can begin.

"Not exactly" Adam replied with a smile on his face knowing that this was a conversation that Rachel and him had often had.

"You know that you are in my mind all of the time so I can only be thinking of food by a little percentage of my brain. I would try and guess how much but I'm not the science teacher or the mathematician" Adam replied and noticed the blush that appeared on Rachel's face when he said he thinks about her all the time. I have to make her better at accepting compliments because if I get my way she will receive plenty of compliments as I will never stop believing how lucky I am to be with Rachel.


	109. Chapter 109

Part 109

Rachel looked back with a slight smile on her face, "you flatterer" Adam decided that for once Rachel wasn't going to get the last word in therefore he replied, "I know but you love me for it". The quick smile was exchanged between the pair of them when Adam turned around to face Emma who was still sitting in the child's seat, "Come on Emma we will race mummy into the restaurant as mummy will be so scared of getting wet that I guarantee we will win" Adam hoped that Rachel was choosing to ignore his comments therefore he decided to continue the debate that he was constantly having with Rachel, "just like you will when you play football because daddy will make sure that you are the best footballer ever".

A quick glance at Rachel told him that she had heard what he had just said, "there is no way that my daughter is going to play football…" Realising that Adam would ask for a plausible reason why Rachel replied, "because she may get hurt like that footballer yesterday" Adam looked at Rachel quizzical; "how do you know about that"

Rachel smiled "see that is the problem with Match of the Day" deciding that the conversation was over the pair of them got out of the car and Adam rushed to the back seat to retrieve Emma and the three of them rushed into the restaurant.

"Miss Koreshi can I have a word please?" an incredibly pale Davina asked the English teacher which caused curious expressions to be passed between the two female members of staff. Surely Tom can't have done something else to hurt her because I can't believe that he is brave enough…if that's what you can call it… to hurt her in school; but if he has I will most certainly be pushing for Davina to report it to the police.

"Yes of course. Complete the questions on Great Expectations and then start the essay about the character of Miss Havisham" Jasmine said to the year 11 who were more eager to find out what was wrong with Davina than care about the work they were suppose to be doing to prepare for their GCSE's.

The two women stood in the corridor away from the prying eyes of Jasmine's class, "Are you ok Davina; it just that you look awful; if you don't mind me saying" Jasmine said to the blonde woman who was still holding her right shoulder; obviously in some discomfort from the pain in it.

"Well that's sort of what I wanted to ask you, I don't feel very well so I'm going to ask Rachel if it is alright for me to go home for the day so I was just wondering whether you would be able to cover my lessons for this afternoon" Davina asked her best friend hoping that she would agree immediately and Davina could begin the short journey home.

"Yes certainly, don't worry about telling Rachel I will do that for you. Just get off home and if you need anything text me and I will try and drop it in on the way home" Jasmine replied and the two women embraced one another which only caused pain to shoot through Davina's adnominal and shoulder. I know that I will turn the heating up and go to bed.

"So we decided that the conditions had improved slightly so we continued upon our journey knowing that within a couple of hours we would officially be on our holiday where it would be centred around the three of them rather than caring about the work commitments and bringing enough money into the house to support the three of them. Emma was smiling as she was gazing out of the window liking the fields and the farm animals that they were passing as they were reaching their destination. We were coming up to a junction and for some reason I had a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach; almost as if I knew something was going to go wrong…and how wrong it went." Rachel exclaimed as once more she had to compose herself.

Phil shuffled his chair towards Rachel and despite the awkwardness that he was feeling from the idea of his intended action he stretched his right arm out and rested it around Rachel's shoulders and pulled her towards him.

Rachel seemed to appreciate this gesture and continued in the explanation which Rachel was now considering whether it was completely necessary to tell Phil the memories which were now causing Rachel deep pain.

Davina walked down the corridor until she was out of sight of Jasmine when she realised that she couldn't take the pain any longer therefore she doubled up in pain resting her left hand against the windowsill hoping that she had some rational explanation for the pain that she was suffering. All I know is that it really hurts and it's making me dizzy. Tom ran down the corridor when he saw Davina; what on earth has happened to her…I hope she is ok because I know that Jasmine was talking strange earlier almost as if she knew that something was wrong with Davina but surely the pair of them would tell me. "Davina what's the matter?" Tom asked with his face etched with concern and a look of tenderness for the woman in front of him.

"We were approaching a junction and the lights were on green so naturally we proceeded and it came from no-where as I have reflected upon the situation so many times I still don't know where it was from. It was dark and I was starting to go sleepy so my eyes were being closed when all of a sudden there was a shunt and then it happened so quickly. The car rolled following the impact and then I don't remember any more as I must have lost consciousness". Rachel stopped talking as the sobs were now uncontrollable only broken by the sound of the school bell signalling that it was the last two lessons of the day; meaning that Phil had missed 2 consecutive lessons.


	110. Chapter 110

Part 110

Phil walked out of the office wishing that he had never started the conversation with Rachel as it was only a question however now it had stirred up so many emotions in the pair of them; obviously Rachel was hurt but at the same time Phil was annoyed. Annoyed at the way people like his mum could have children; whereas people who deserved children had to live without them as Emma had been so cruelly ripped away from Rachel; causing her life to spiral into destruction.

Obviously Rachel hadn't told me this but I remember mum saying that we weren't going to see Rachel because she wasn't very well I was confused because in the weeks that we had seen Rachel previously she had been the happiest that I have ever seen her but then I was young and I trusted mum…what a big mistake I should have seen through her there and then because surely I would have realised that if someone is unhappy then they should be helped through the problem not excluded. How isolated must Rachel have felt.

Rachel rested her head against the head rest on her chair; not exactly something that was on my list of things to do today. What must Phil think of me because that must have been really awkward to see his aunty and head teacher emotionally break down in front of him; how very unprofessional and I didn't even get to tell Phil the part which haunts me; the only image that I can't get out of my head and the one reason why I know that anyone who gets close to me will suffer.

The mangled car had rolled over until it came off the road and rolled down the embankment until it was lodged in the forest below. The previous grinding sound of the metal upon the road had subsided as now there was a deathly silence surrounding the three people who were in the car about to be ripped apart.

It was late in the evening therefore the only other car which was witness to the accident was the other car which had taken part in the destruction of the other car therefore they were in no hurry to stay around waiting for the verdict of dangerous driving resulting in the driver escaping from the scene eager to make sure that it looked like a tragic accident; with other road users totally unaware of the three people who were trapped in the car among the trees and rocks.

Phil stood against the wall gazing out of the window watching the rain drops run down the window pane unable to make the distinction between the rain drops and Rachel's barriers as he had aided in their destruction as he could see a clear resemblance between the two them. It just isn't fair that Rachel should have something like that happen other but mum can have children when she really doesn't deserve any.

The tears began to cascade down Phil's cheeks as he realised the pain that he had caused Rachel to suffer; the one woman that Phil saw as a mother figure for him; it's not as though mum has done much to earn the title but I wish that I could do something to help Rachel because I know that I have managed to work her into a state and the flaw in Rachel's character is that she won't tell anyone but instead she will keep it hidden hoping that no-one will realise her suffering perhaps because to my knowledge she has had years where people didn't care about her. But I hope she realises that those days are gone because she has me and Eddie. I know that I thought it was strange to begin with and I wasn't overly keen on living in the same house as the headteacher and now her having a relationship with Eddie; it was hard for me to take in…but I have to admit that it is incredible because it has made Rachel a lot happier as she knows that she will always have someone who is going to stand by her through thick and thin because I know Rachel tries to act very independent but the truth is Rachel needs someone and if that 'someone' has to be Eddie then who am I to stop it.

Steph checked her watch; 2:30, on a Friday afternoon I can't see that Rachel is going to object too much if I go to her office for a friendly chat is she? It's not as though the pair of us haven't got closer over the recent months because we have especially after what happened with Maxine and Earl. I'm just so pleased that Rachel managed to stop Ralph being able to release Earl out of revenge.

Steph leant her head to one side hearing a muffled cry coming from inside one of the classrooms that she had just walked past…I wonder who it is because I know that I wanted to go and talk to Rachel but that can wait because I have a responsibility to the person who is crying because I wasn't there enough for Maxine when she needed me with Earl and I'm just so pleased that she pulled through as I have the opportunity to make amends…so there is no way that I'm going to make the same mistakes now because I'm older…definitely older and hopefully wiser.

Phil was right Rachel was now curled up on the sofa and letting out the feelings that she had kept hidden for 5 years; the only problem was that there was no-one there to put her thoughts into perspective and to help her realise that what happened was terrible but she got through it and it made her a better person as it was used as her inspiration for the future.

Rachel's eyes flickered open when simultaneously the pain receptors recognised the pain that she was currently in; causing the feelings of anxiousness and loss all that more apparent. This was intensified as Rachel could hardly move due to the throbbing pain that shot through her body in every attempt; almost as though she was being warned that moving was not a good idea in her situation. However the determined strong willpower that Rachel had and the silence that encased the atmosphere around her made her convinced that she was moving especially as the first aid training she had received; in her bid to be a teacher; told her that she had broken a couple of ribs therefore she couldn't really do much more damage and the two people in the car with her were in silence and as Rachel couldn't turn to see either of them she panicked about their current situation. I pray that they are in a better situation then me because I don't know what I would do without them because they are my entire world. It sounds like a cliché but without them there is no point in me living.


	111. Chapter 111

Part 111

Tom knocked on Eddie's door almost surprised to see him here as he knew that Eddie wasn't teaching so he had expected to see an empty classroom with Eddie being in Rachel's office. They obviously aren't as close as Steph would like to claim; but at least it means that I will be able to ask Eddie without Rachel being there not because I think that she would say no but it is just easier not having to ask her in the first place.

Eddie immediately raised his head to the door and the look of disappointment on the recognition of Tom's face was clear to the man the other side of the door. Maybe Steph isn't that wrong after all then. Eddie nodded to signal the acceptance for the intrusion from the younger man.

"Eddie can I have a favour mate?" Tom asked hoping that Eddie was in a better mood than the disappointed expression gave the impression of.

Eddie looked at Tom quizzical almost as though he was trying to predetermine what the situation could be but as Tom wasn't someone to ask for too many favours it was harder to gauge.

Davina had eventually arrived home in the car after already agreeing that he would get a lift from Jasmine. I'm so glad that I'm home because I really don't feel very well I knew it this morning when I was sick but determined that I was going to go into work I thought nothing of it…but now I have a throbbing pain in my right shoulder and every so often I double over in pain as it feels as though someone is punching and kicking me in the stomach. I wish I knew what had caused these problems because I had to promise Jasmine that I would go to the doctors if I don't feel any better tomorrow although I think that she is massively exaggerating the possible explanations as it is probably just some virus.

Steph marched into the classroom determined that she was going to help the person in their moment of desperation and despair. I'm determined that I'm not to let this person down because they need me and I'm not going to fail somebody else.

Steph pushed the slightly opened door tilled it was wide enough for her to pass unannounced. Should I alert the person to my presence or keep quiet.

The sight in front of Steph shocked her as she never expected to see Phil still with his back against the window with the tears streaming down his face. What can be the matter with him? Should I take him to Rachel; because she is his aunty I wonder if she will know what to say to him?

The maternal instinct made Steph spring into action; as she sat on the floor beside Phil and pulled him into her warm embrace hoping that he would be comforted by these actions and feel ready to tell Steph the situation that had caused him to be in such a state.

Rachel closed her eyes with an increasing tiredness due to being haunted with the images that had plagued her thoughts ever since the day that it happened. I can't ignore them because I feel very guilty about it as indirectly it was my fault…I killed my own daughter.

Rachel unclipped her seat-beat and resisted the urge to cry out in pain when she forced her body into an upright position in the hope that she would be able to see Adam carrying Emma out of the car and to safety…however the reality of the situation was incredibly different.

The silence of the car along with the sight of the scene in front made Rachel feel as though she was being physically crushed; wishing that she was able to do anything to help the two people in front of her.

The pair of them lying limp in the seats told Rachel that this wasn't something that the pair of them were going to walk away from.

Tom believed that this was the indication for him to continue therefore he said, "I know that it is extremely unprofessional but I wondered whether I would be able to leave slightly early day…I'm not teaching so it's not as though anyone would have to cover my lessons it's just that Davina has already gone home as she wasn't very well and I'm afraid to say that I wasn't overly sympathetic so I think that she could do with a bit of TLC". Eddie paused before he made his decision as he was trying to determine why Tom had come to ask him instead of going straight to Rachel.

"Can I ask why you asked me instead of Rachel" Eddie asked with a brief smile flickering across his face with the mention of Rachel's name. He has got it bad for Rachel if he can't even say her name without the feelings showing for her. Maybe Steph wasn't so wrong after all.

"Well I went to her office about half an hour ago and I heard her talking to someone; Bridget then told me that she had been talking to Phil for the majority of the afternoon. So I am to ask you as I didn't like to interrupt the pair of them". Tom explained and immediately the concern that Eddie felt was represented on his face. I wonder what has happened between the pair of them.

Rachel's eyes searched the two people's faces looking for some sign of life hoping that the situation wasn't as dire as it appeared; however when she received no signal from either of them. Rachel shuffled across in the car; although finding it difficult as the car was on its side and the suspected broken ribs did nothing to aid Rachel in her attempts to help Emma and Adam.

Rachel concern for the immediate safety of her daughter; intensified by the constant crying that Emma had started showing that she was either scared or hurt…or a combination of both.

Rachel looked to her fiancé and saw that his eyes had started to flicker showing that all three of them had survived the car accident.

Tom had arrived home relatively quickly despite running the entire way home; seems as though my fitness training with the girls football team also improved my fitness.


	112. Chapter 112

Part 112

Phil pulled away from Steph almost as if the comfort that she was offering had just been noticed by him therefore to prevent any more embarrassment, Phil withdrew from the embrace. If she asks me what's wrong I have no idea what I can say because I know that Rachel would approve of me telling the actual reason and it makes me sound selfish because I'm upset when I don't even actually know the true extent of the pain suffered and if it wasn't for me then Rachel would never have remembered it today.

However Phil had no such luck in his hope that Steph wouldn't ask what the problem was, "so then are you going to tell me why you were upset" Steph asked using the motherly tone that she had adapted from her experiences with Maxine. This only served to make it harder for Phil; that makes me want to tell Miss Haydock but I know that Rachel would hate me forever.

Steph saw the hesitance as nerves therefore she replied, "It's ok; it will stay between you and me; we don't even have to tell Rach…Miss Mason" Steph corrected herself, "If you don't want to"

Rachel was startled by the sound of the school bell signalling that it was the end of the school day. The defence mechanisms had already been building and fortifying the walls which had been depleted from the conversation with Phil. What a waste of an afternoon! Rachel thought as her eyes flickered to the paperwork in front of her knowing that she was using it as a shield to keep her thoughts away from the things that had hurt her today but almost being prepared to do this as long as it kept the painful memories at bay. Well I can do it tonight; it's not as though I have any other plans.

Davina heard keys jangling in the lock from her position in the kitchen so rather than waiting for Tom to open the door she walked towards it with the intention of opening it for him. Despite the strong intention that Davina would open the door for him she was halted with the crippling pain which once again caused her to double over and wince. I wish I knew what was wrong but I guess that it came by itself so it will go by itself…as a good night sleep will sort me out.

Noticing a movement in the door Davina took a deep breath; standing upright trying to hide any previous pain that she may have been in, Tom who hadn't been witness to the sudden change in posture looked at Davina noticing the lack of colour in her cheeks. Now I see why she came home as she really doesn't look very well I wish that there was something that I could do to help her as I feel really guilty about going out tonight when I should perhaps be looking after her.

"Adam can you hear me" Rachel called with hope in her voice praying that it wasn't an illusion and he was actually coming back to her. I'm so pleased I honesty thought that I had lost the pair of them. The groan in pain that Rachel heard between the distraught crying of her daughter told Rachel that Adam was awake but needed serious help. The tears started to soak into the carpet which Rachel was unaware of because she was too involved in the flashback that she was seeing.

Rachel leant forwards and took Adam's hand within hers, "Look I need to get Emma out of the car because she is scared and I will try and find help but I promise that I will come back for you" The tugged force on her hand when Rachel withdrew from the kiss that she had placed on his forehead told Rachel that he had something to say to her. Rachel looked quizzical at Adam, especially when he responded with his comment, "Rachel look after Emma for us, make sure that she grows up to achieve all her dreams and find yourself someone else who loves you the way that you deserve to be loved". Adam smiled at Rachel seeing her face and wishing that he wasn't aware that he would be departing the pair of them shortly.

"Adam" Rachel exclaimed when she grasped the full extent of his comment, "why would I need to do that when you would be right beside me because I need you" Rachel replied to Adam as he smiled back her hoping that he would be able to stop her being so scared; "Rachel you don't need me because you are the strongest woman that I know and I will love you forever; and promise that you will never forget that and you will look after Emma" Adam asked as Rachel tried to remove her hand from Adam's grasp however the small pull he caused Rachel to feel mad her look at the man she loves, "yes I promise and don't go anywhere because I will be back soon". The pair of them slowly released the grip they had on one another's hand and Rachel leant forwards to kiss Adam on the lips again.

Tom rushed to Davina's side noticing both the lack of colour and the pained expression on her face. "You really don't look very well" Tom stated as he looked at the woman he loves with tenderness in his eyes hoping that he would be able to take her pain away however the answer he replied almost made him wish that he hadn't said anything, "thanks you do know how to make someone feel better and cheer them up don't you!" Davina replied in a tone which Tom had already discovered during their short time being married to one another; meant that he had done something or said something wrong. I can't win; if I didn't say anything I would get accused of not caring and when you do it is wrong anyway perhaps I shouldn't bother.

"I'm sorry but I meant that you should be in bed resting" Tom tried to preserver with Davina hoping that she would accept his caring words and retreat to bed where the pair of them knew was the best place for her. When Davina made no indication of her desire or intention to move Tom decided to try and usher her upstairs, "come on go to bed I will make you something to eat and a drink but it will do you go if you are resting" Tom exclaimed hoping that this would be enough to convince her.

The glare that Tom received told him that Davina was even more unimpressed with him, however deciding that she hadn't got the energy to have an argument with Tom; Davina proceeded to walk up the stairs hoping that the pain in her shoulder and stomach would have diminished by the time she woke up.


	113. Chapter 113

Part 113

"Come on Emma please stop crying mummy has to try and find someone to help us but it doesn't look very likely around here" Rachel pleaded with her daughter hoping that this would ease the crying and help clear the impending headache that Rachel was starting to notice a result of the collision, tiredness and nerves about Adam. Needless to say Emma didn't calm down or relieve Rachel's fears by being co-operative and the increasing anger that Rachel was starting to talk to her with did nothing to help the issue between the pair of them. Why can't she stop crying and go to sleep; my phone is broken and it feels as though I have been walking along this road f ranges because I really don't know where the nearest phone is. Why did we have to go on roads where it was so dark? The drizzling rain was now blowing into Rachel's face via the wintry wind which had caught hold of the skin exposed around Rachel's neck and it bit her making her realise the sudden drop in temperature and the coldness which Rachel had been immune to previously.

Rachel wrapped the blanket around Emma hoping that she would be kept warm and the warmth would send her to sleep however the insistent crying told Rachel that this plan wasn't as successful as she had initially hoped. Rachel sighed, looks as though she is going to be grizzly all of tonight then but I can't complain too much because I could have lost her in the accident but I haven't I have still got the pair of them.

The driving rain and wind was pushing Rachel further back almost draining Rachel's confidence and will-power to continue. I don't even know if I'm going in the right way but I just hope that I will eventually reach help because although the positive side of me says that the three of us have survived there is some nagging feeling in the pit of my stomach that the worst is yet to come. But then that could just because I always focus on the negative when it comes to my life; although normally there is good reason to.

"Sorry Steph but it's nothing I was just being silly but I had better go" Phil replied hoping that this would be enough to ease Steph's suspicions and allow him to leave her presence. Steph released her hands from Phil's shoulders hoping that he would feel more comfortable soon so he would be able to tell her. Because he looks as though he needs to tell someone something and I just wish that he felt comfortable around me to tell me. I must be such a terrible person that no body wants to confide anything in me.

Rachel stopped in her thoughts with the sight in front of her…that looks as though there is a light there; so hopefully I will be able to get some help from there and ensure that my family are all safe…perhaps it wasn't the best holiday that we wished for before the wedding.

Pulling Emma closer towards her she surged forwards as fast as her legs which were filled with lactic acid would take her. This is just what I needed because I was beginning to lose hope because it is incredible dark and if I wander for much further the pair of us could have got very lost so Adam would still be without help and Emma would be getting increasingly cold which isn't good for any children.

Tom knocked the door signalling that he was planning on entering the bedroom which Davina had stormed into following their conflict downstairs. On opening the door, Davina wished she had the energy to roll over in disgust but deciding that she had neither the energy nor the inclination, Davina stayed where she was vowing that she would hear Tom out.

Davina's bad mood was lifted with the sight of Tom carrying her a tray of food containing a small bar of chocolate something that Davina instantly spotted hoping that comfort food was something that she was lacking and the pain in both her shoulder and stomach would subside with the sweet taste of chocolate. Well it might not help but it is a good excuse isn't it and Tom brought it so it would be rude not to eat it.

"Thank you Tom; I'm sorry for being in such a mood earlier. I'm not very well and I've been taking it out on you when I shouldn't have because you always stick by me" Davina said as Tom rested on the end of the bed and looked lovingly in the Davina's eyes.

"No I'm sorry I shouldn't have been thinking about going out tonight with my friends I should have stayed at home to care for you" Tom said with the sincere apology showing in his eyes and the love that he has for her.

Davina smiled at the love that Tom has for her but knowing that she wouldn't be much company tonight she said, "No Tom, you go…I'm not going to be much company tonight so you might as well be with your friends. Have a good time and I'll see you tonight. I love you" Davina said as she stretched her arms out and welcomed Tom into her arms.

"Ok…if you are sure" Tom checked with Davina hoping that she would smile which always lit up her face making Tom feel happier as he knew that she was happy. Davina nodded, "but if anything happens or you feel worse phone me and I will be start home" Tom stated and Davina responded, "yes sir".

Tom leant forwards and gave Davina a kiss before he left her; saying that he hoped she felt better soon. I really hope she feels better soon because I feel embarrassed that I didn't notice that she wasn't very well and I'm not going to stay out very long because I'm sure the lads will understand it.

A few paces from the source of light Rachel started to run with the knowledge that it was a house and she could see a silhouette in the window signifying that somebody was awake and they would have a telephone therefore she would be able to get help for the two people that she loved more than anything in the entire world.

Rachel knocked on the door quite loudly although the strength she used had caused her already blue knuckles to feel the pain shoot through them. I hope that there is somebody in because I'm really cold so I'm guess that Emma must be.


	114. Chapter 114

Part 114

Rachel closed her eyes trying to remove the painful memories which until today had been repressed, shuffling the paperwork Rachel was preparing the stack which she would be taking to do with her over the weekend knowing that she would need something to keep her mind off today's events.

Rachel was startled by the sound of somebody knocking on her sanctity door; I hope that it isn't Eddie because he will see start through fake smile and it really don't think that I could stand Eddie comforting when I know that he can't be mine.

Perhaps I could keep quiet and pretend that I'm not here but I might be needed so I had better complete my duty as the Head of this school until 4:30 when I will leave the building for the weekend; so only 15 minutes to go then.

Tom pushed open the door and looked at the peaceful Davina who had succumbed to the sleep that her body craved. I'm pleased that she is getting some sleep because she has looked very unwell today so I hope that this will help her. I feel guilty for going out but I hope that she will call me if there are any problems. Tom placed the note on the bedside table and placed a kiss on Davina's forehead. "I love you so much" Tom had one last glance at the woman that he loved and left her lying peacefully on the bed.

"Come in" the ritual command was sounded and the door instantly swung open with the blonde haired woman marching confidently through the door. Great what has Steph come to quiz me about then?

Rachel wasn't particularly comforted by the sight of the blonde women lingering in the door way of her office. Another person that I didn't want to see so I will sort out her problem, bid her goodbye and leave the premises, settling for another evening alone with a bottle of wine for company.

Eddie looked around his classroom before he switched the light off, pleased that he had finished for the weekend. Hopefully I can convince Rachel to come for a drink with me and then I have Michael over the entire weekend…which will be brilliant because I might be able to include Rachel on one of the days as Michael can help me in trying to convince Rachel that I love her. Eddie looked at the books that needed to be marked over the weekend, with a smile on his face, Eddie shut the door leaving the books discarded on the desk. I can picture Rachel's face as she wouldn't imagine leaving her paperwork for the weekend as she is addicted to it but in fairness she does keep the school afloat due to all the work that she puts in. I know that the school wouldn't work without her in it because I wouldn't choose to work here with only Steph and Grantly for company.

"Hi Steph, do come in. How can I help you?" Rachel asked in the most professional and cheery voice that she manage in her current emotional state. Steph tilted her head to one side almost as if she was trying to look behind the barriers which were used to protect Miss Mason to enable Steph to see the 'real Rachel'. Someone that Steph was convinced had only been seen in glances and mainly shown to the pupils who didn't judge Rachel unlike the fellow teachers in the school. I can't help but think that I am partly responsible because I used to take glee in others misfortune.

"I've just seen Phil and he was very upset" Steph stated as she started to approach the desk noticing the red, puffy eyes that Rachel was trying to hide by her rapid blinking. I wonder if something has happened between the pair of them then because they both look as though they are upset; I hope that an unwelcome person isn't threatening to make a comeback because I will definitely be signing a petition to get rid of her and I'm sure that Matt will support me because I don't think any body would want her back.

Eddie looked onto the school field seeing the boys football team having a training session. That is another difference that Rachel has made because initially no-one would chose to stay at Waterloo Road any longer than absolutely necessary. I'm sure that the only scrum; that the pupils knew was the race to get to the school gates before their fellow pupils and the staff. Eddie continued upon his ascend up the stairs to Rachel and noticed that her office door was shut. I wonder if everything is ok because I noticed that Phil wasn't in the lesson just so I wonder if something has happened to Rachel. If it has I will ensure that I am the one that will support her through it due to the remarkable changes that she has made in my life by just being part of it.

Inside the office the panic was evident on Rachel's face with the recognition as to what Steph had told her. "Why what was the matter with him" Immediately Rachel's caring instantly removed any other emotions that were racing through her body as now she was concerned solely for her nephew and his feelings. I hope it isn't because of what I told him because I would hate to think that I have affected him because he doesn't deserve my past to affect his future.

Steph looked at the woman in front of her whom she had begun to respect and although she wouldn't actually admit to anyone she actually liked. Something must have happened between them because Rachel looks really concerned now; perhaps that I will be able to help because I'm a good listener…or so I've been told.

The taxi sounded outside the house as Tom looked up the stairs questioning whether he should leave his wife when he knew that she wasn't very well. What is the better option?


	115. Chapter 115

Part 115

"Rachel is there anything that I can do to help" Steph asked as she looked at the younger woman with concern in her eyes noticing the torn expression that was evident in them. I hope that Rachel feels she can tell me because surprisingly I don't have a hidden agenda which is strange for me because normally I assume that everybody has a hidden agenda.

Rachel seemed to look at Steph questioning whether it was a good idea to unload her troubles to the biggest gossip in the school; choosing that it wasn't the best idea, Rachel replied with her trademark answer which was the best defence mechanism that she knew, "I'm fine".

Tom looked at the house which he was about to enter; well it has changed since I was here last; lets just say that it clearly has a woman's touch. The door opened signalling that his arrival had been duly noted by the people inside who had been waiting for the impeding visit from the recently-married man that the group of people inside the house had been waiting for.

"Hi Tom; nice to see you mate" Ryan exclaimed as he stretched out his hand waiting to welcome the man they had been waiting for.

Steph responded with a wry smile knowing that this wasn't the truth and she desperately needed someone to talk too; although that blatantly can't be me I just hope that she has someone she feels she can talk to someone. I know as well as anyone that it isn't good to keep things locked away inside of you. Steph looked at her watch wishing that it wasn't nearing the time that she had promised that she would pick Maxine up; this wasn't because she didn't want to pick Maxine up but it was because the instinct in Steph told her to try and help everyone and at this precise moment Rachel was the person who needed this help.

Davina raised her hand to her shoulder hoping that the pain she was experiencing would have miraculously vanished following her brief sleep however she was sadly mistaken. I will go downstairs and get a drink because I know that with this pain in my shoulder I won't be going to sleep any time soon.

Davina slowly twisted trying to ignore the pain in her adnominal when she was twisting her lower back; to enable her to get out of the bed which Tom had left her in. A piece of paper which was swept onto the floor was left disregarded by the woman who was in severe pain. I really don't feel very well today I wish I knew what was wrong with me because at this rate I'm starting to think that Jasmine was right and I should go to hospital as it is really strange.

Rachel picked up on Steph looking at her watch realising that this signalled the end of the conversation. At least I haven't said anything that I may later wish to retract.

Steph stood up and looked with concern at Rachel who was looking as though she wanted to tell somebody something but she didn't know how to. "Rachel; can I give you some advice?" Steph asked taking a deep breath hoping that Rachel wouldn't resent her for saying such a comment. I know that Rachel likes to be independent so she may not appreciate being told what she should do.

Whether Rachel actually wanted to hear the advice she decided that she could at least listen to Steph because she normally provides good advice as she has her heart in the right place.

"You need to talk to someone…" before Rachel was able to interrupt her, Steph continued in her explanation, "even if that person can't be me you need to talk to someone and I hope that they will offer you the comfort that you need".

Rachel looked to the floor almost as if the words had cut through her because she knew that Steph was right and one day Rachel was going to have to left someone to get behind her barriers. I just have to find someone who will care about me enough to protect me and support me because I know that I will need it.

Looking at the auburn haired woman in the room that she was departing Steph couldn't help but feel concern for the woman in front of her which was alleviated by the words that were spoken by the woman, "thanks I will bear that in mind". The tone of voice that was used signalled that Rachel needed to talk to someone but there wasn't anyone that she thought she was able to confide in.

Davina rested her hands on the kitchen table hoping that a few deep breaths would prevent the wheezing feeling in her chest and the oxygen would eliminate the pain receptors which were going into overdrive. Davina's eyes were involuntary closing and there was nothing that she was able to do to prevent it; the black was pulling Davina towards it as she fell through the oblivion with the pain being suppressed into a feeling of numb. The house was filled with quiet as all that could be heard were the soft sounds of the radio filling the house; with all the previous light being extinguished.

The office door shut on Steph's exit and Rachel rested her head on the back of her chair hoping that she had been able to tell Steph her problems; I wish that I had someone I could unburden my problems to because I feel that I need someone because I need help with Phil; I don't mind if I suffer due to my past but I can't accept my past affecting someone else's life especially when they deserve a better life because Mel couldn't give him it.


	116. Chapter 116

Part 116

I appreciate that Steph is trying to help but there are things that have happened in my life that very few people know about. Immediately Rachel continued in her thoughts about the recollection of events that she was telling Phil before he had to leave her.

Rachel held Emma closer to her in an attempt to soothe her but was interrupted with the sound of the emergency operators with their attempts to establish what Rachel was saying in her panic and worry for Adam.

"Yes please hurry up because I know that he isn't very well but he was conscious when I left him" Rachel explained as the emergency operator had extracted the information that they needed to enable them to help Rachel and her family.

Rachel placed the phone back in the holder and looked at the woman who was standing beside Rachel by the phone. "Is there anything that I'm able to do...do you want a drink or a blanket for the baby" the woman asked Rachel hoping that she was able to offer as much support as the younger woman needed.

Rachel shook her head; wanting to get back to Adam as soon as she could. I wish that I was by Adam because I know that he needs me now as I've left him. I should have stayed by him because if anything has happened to him then I will never forgive myself.

"Well your baby looks cold so I will get a baby for her and then I will drop you back in my car so you will get back quicker and make me feel better because you will be out of the cold".

Tom placed the round of drinks on the table that the six of them had chosen to sit around, "well this is a first I didn't think that Tom ever brought any drinks" James said to the rest of them which caused laughter from the other four who had taken their respective drink from the tray which Tom had brought. "Well that is all down to the good woman that I have married" Tom said to the men in front of him to which they jokingly rolled their eyes to one another. That reminds me I had better text her to ensure that she is ok because I feel a bit guilty for leaving her when she doesn't feel very well.

Tom withdrew his phone from his pocket which caused the other five to look at him confused until Ryan decided to ask him the question which they were all thinking.

"I need to text Davina to ask her something" Tom stated as he began texting her until he had the phone pulled from his hand by Ryan, "when I was your best man it wasn't so you would be under the thumb this is an evening to be spent with us telling each other why we are all better off without the respective women in our lives". The other men around the table were all nodding to show they totally agreed with Ryan's speech which didn't please Tom so he sat there with his arms folded and a scowl on his face; which only served as further amusement for the rest of them.

Rachel thanked the woman for giving her a lift back to the site of the accident but the sight in front of Rachel took her breath away and immediately Rachel forgot anything else that was in her mind and ran towards the car which contained the man she loved.

Rachel ran towards the car and the image that she witnessed caused her knees to buckle under the shock and if it wasn't for the quick thinking of police officer who had been approaching Rachel; after realising who she was, she would have fallen to the floor.

"You must be Miss Mason" the policeman observed to which Rachel nodded unable to let the words pass the lump in her throat. Seeing the small indication as to who she was the police man continued in his description of the situation to the shell-shocked woman who was holding the baby who was crying obviously in distress; either picking up on the feelings of the woman or in some pain.

"Well Adam has suffered serious injuries following the collision and we are going to try and get him out as soon as we can because he needs to get to hospital to enable to doctors to treat his injuries. I'm afraid to say that it doesn't look go and you should probably prepare yourself for the worst…" The policeman was still talking but Rachel was unable to comprehend any more information as all she wanted to do was to be able to return a period earlier in the day when the happy family were all preparing to go on their first holiday with one another.

The letter box rattled and was greeted by the deathly silence in return as following Davina's adventure downstairs into the kitchen there had been no other movement in the house. The letter box was lifted to enable the prying eyes to see into the house wondering what had happened for the house to be submerged into the darkness and silence which it had fallen into. The eyes travelled as far to the closed kitchen doors unable to see the woman collapsed on the kitchen floor unable to call out for help as the darkness had enclosed around her; removing her pain and fears providing a perfect tranquil situation for her to be in.

The letter box clattered causing Davina's eyes to flicker in recognition of the noise trying to reach a hand out to grasp anything that would be used to create a noise to signal the danger was useless as there was nothing to hand for the woman. The letter box closed firmly with the person deciding that Davina must be asleep and Tom had gone out like he had said he was going to. I will come back later because Davina must be sleep so at least she is getting the rest that she needed.

Davina lacked the energy to stretch for any other object and chose to allow the darkness to embrace her again hoping that this ordeal would be over soon and she would be in the arms of the man that she loves.

Rachel was interrupted from her thoughts with the sight of the policeman looking at her almost as if he was expecting an answer from her. "I'm sorry I didn't hear that" Rachel responded with caused the policeman to look at her with compassion in his eyes realising the agony that Rachel was in, knowing that this request wouldn't help her in relieving the suffering.

"Adam has been asked for you and he is getting quite distress as you aren't there which isn't helping his injuries so the paramedics were hoping that you might consider going to sit by him in the car and talking to him" the policeman asked to which Rachel rapidly nodded hoping that she would be able to see the man that she love and realising that it was just being exaggerated by the emergency services. They always make people fear the worst because it covers their insurance if anything happens when they have initially said that everything is fine.


	117. Chapter 117

Part 117

Rachel started to march towards the car with a purpose until she heard the authoritative voice of the policeman and felt a hand on her forearm. "Miss Mason, we suggest that you don't take your daughter because it will be putting another person in danger and we don't have a helmet small enough for her". Rachel's eyes flickered down to her daughter pulling her closer towards her hoping that this would stop her being so irritable as everything that Rachel had tried hadn't made any difference.

Sensing Rachel's concern and letting her daughter out of her arms, the policeman responded, "she can stay with the nurse that has come out with the paramedic and she will look after her; checking that she isn't injured and the pair of them will always be in your sight". The policeman held his arms out to Rachel awaiting Rachel's daughter to be handed to him.

"Aww cheer up Tom; it doesn't suit you to be sitting there miserable. Surely you are going to give us a little smile" Ryan teased Tom who was looking more and more miserable as the night continued. I wish they would give me my phone because I would be able to check if Davina is ok and then I would be able to enjoy the rest of the evening.

Rachel placed a kiss on her daughter's forehead wishing that she didn't have to part with her. I wish I could keep Emma with me because I already feel as part of my family has been taken away from me I couldn't stand it if anyone else was. Quickly Rachel placed Emma into the police officers hands knowing that she wouldn't do it at all if she didn't do it quickly. "Don't worry Miss Mason, the nurse will look after her because it doesn't seem as though she wants to settle".

Steph walked into the staffroom looking around for Eddie hoping that she would be able to send him in Rachel's direction enabling her to have someone to unload her problems onto however when he was no-where to be seen, Steph's hopes sank. I really wish I could find him because Rachel seems vulnerable almost as if her barriers have been dismantled today; which may be the only chance of people finding out what is going on in her head. All I know is that if I can't find any one else then I will do it because I know that Rachel needs help and I'm not going to abandon her when she needs her friends and family the most.

Rachel had one last glance towards Emma and then wishing that she was able to hold her daughter in her arms wishing that she would be able to soothe her cries and tell her that everything would be 'fine'.

Rachel was unaware of the helmet being placed on her head and the jacket held behind her waiting for Rachel to stretch her arms out allowing the jacket to enclose around her; for all Rachel could hear was Adam's pleading for them to ensure that Rachel and Emma were safe. "Please leave me; I need you to know whether they are ok because they are all that matters". A lump rose in Rachel's throat due to the extent of his love for them but it occurred to Rachel that at this present moment he was the one who needed looking after more than them.

Rachel felt a hand applying pressure to the bottom of her back; almost as if they were waiting for confirmation that this was what Rachel wanted to do and then waiting to catch Rachel if she fell; literally or metaphorically.

Rose opened the Clarkson gate preparing to try and communicate with Davina as she knew that she wasn't feeling very well earlier and witnessing Tom leaving the house she felt that somebody had to be protective of her and she had to look after her. Opening the letter door again; Rose could only see the shut kitchen door; it is very strange because I can hear the radio so if Davina is awake why isn't she answering the door and if she is asleep why would the radio be on?

Rose thought about the options that she had available to her; I could ignore it and pretend that I don't know any situations that are happening or I could try and see if there is something wrong with Davina by getting into the house.

Rose closed the letter box and retreated to the gate with her emotions torn as to what would be the best course of action.

Rachel's heart initially soared when she saw Adam however the harsh reality of the situation pulled her back to Earth along with the sound of his voice, "Rachel?" he called almost as if he couldn't quite believe that she was there sitting beside him and in perfect health. The smile that was plastered across his features told her everything that she needed to know about his extent of love for her.

"I'm here Adam; don't worry everything is going to be ok. You will get out of here…I think the wedding will have to be delayed for a bit" Rachel exclaimed with a nervous laugh showing the concern that she had for the man in front of her.

Adam smiled back at her unable to pass any further comment due to the lump in his throat at the realisation that Rachel was worried. Rachel is never worried because she likes to claim that she is strong so I wonder if something has happened to Emma?


	118. Chapter 118

Part 118

Steph saw Matt sitting on the sofa; I wonder if he knows where Eddie is? Approaching Matt from behind; he wasn't aware of her presence in the staffroom therefore he jumped when he heard her voice behind him. "Matt have you seen Eddie?" The urgency in Steph's voice concerned Matt as he was worried about his friend who he knew wasn't as tough as she liked to make out.

"No I haven't not since he was in here earlier anyway. Why is everything ok?" Matt asked concerned about his best friend.

Steph shook her head; "no it's not and I really don't know what I can do about it" she responded with the tears in her eyes which immediately made Matt place the magazine on the table in front of him as he took hold of Steph's hand pulling her towards him sitting on the sofa. "Steph sit down and tell me what has happened because I'm sure that it's something that can be sorted". Matt responded trying to install some confidence into her.

Steph shook she head; "I'm sorry but I don't think that I can tell you the full story; partly because I don't know it myself but all I know that something has happened between Rachel and Phil…" Steph stopped as she felt that she was unable to continue speaking without breaking down.

Matt looked confused, "Steph I don't mean to be rude but why does that affect you"

Steph looked back at Matt, "because it is another person that I have let down…Matt please tell me that I'm not a complete failure" Steph asked hoping that he would reassure her.

"Steph listen to me, you are not a complete failure" Matt said looking in Steph's eyes for added effect; to ensure that she believed his words. Matt wrapped his arm around Steph's shoulders and pulled her closer towards him.

Immediately Adam felt panic and in his desire to extinguish his fears and comfort Rachel he stretched out his left hand and waited for Rachel to grasp hold of it; which she instantaneously did. He stroked the back of her hand with his thumb hoping that he was able to relieve her fears. "Don't worry Rachel; everything will sort itself out you will see" Adam said as he smiled at her knowing that she was worrying about the people around her.

"I know" Rachel replied hoping that the words would offer the strength that her voice was unable to deliver.

"Rachel can you do something for me?" Adam asked with his eyes glistening with the tears that he was refusing to release. Rachel looked quizzical at Adam therefore he continued speaking, "Promise me that you will look after Emma for us; make sure she…" Rachel interrupted him unable to allow him to talk any longer as she didn't want to accept what he was saying to her. "No Adam; we are both going to look after her as we will be the family that we have always wanted"

Rose walked around to the back of the Clarkson house hoping that she would be able to find some indication as to whether everything was ok in the house. I can't see anyone and there is no way of getting intro the house because ever door seems to be locked so what can I do. Rose pulled her phone out of her pocket and rang the house; with the phone being heard through the window pane. I must be that she is asleep then I will tell Tom that I looked in on her and everything seemed to be fine.

Adam shook his head, "No Rachel…" trying to fight back the tears meant that he needed to take a deep breath as he try and compose himself. I must stay strong for Rachel because I know that she will need me more than ever at the moment because she will definitely be scared…I just need her to know that she will manage and she will get through this.

Adam regained his composure and continued speaking to Rachel as she was the only one left in the car as the paramedics that were attempting to free Adam had left the pair of them alone as they were outside trying to discuss the best course of action. "Rachel…listen to me. You are the love of my life and I'm so pleased that I found happiness with you however I know that it is now time for me to go" Rachel emitted a sob and Adam would have done anything to be able to embrace Rachel and tell her that this wasn't actually happening. Adam stroked the back of Rachel's hand with his thumb hoping that this was offering the comfort to her that he knew that she craved.

"This wasn't supposed to happen" Adam stated as his eyes connecting with Rachel's through the misty haze of both of their tears. "But you Rachel are incredibly strong…a lot stronger than you think" Rachel at this stage was shaking her head knowing that this was finally goodbye for the pair of them.

"Don't you disagree with me Mason" Adam joked hoping that he could inject some humour into the situation to make it easier for Rachel, "but don't worry I know that everything will work out for you in the end…you will continue to train to become a teacher and be the best that there has ever been…you will be respected by both pupils and staff…even loved by them. You will find another man that you will love and the pair of you will bring up Emma together; treating her as if she is your own daughter".

Rachel looked horrified at this last comment until Adam started to explain again, "I know it seems as though I am asking you to forget me and I know that it may seem impossible for you to find anyone else but I promise you that it will happen because I will be by your side ever step of the way. I will never leave you…not really".


	119. Chapter 119

Part 119

Steph had left Matt with the pair of them deciding to split up in their search for Eddie. I have to help Steph find him because I know that we had all previously agreed to go to the pub but I'm sure that can wait as I know that Steph needs me at the minute because for some reason it seems to have affected her. Steph hurried down the corridor hoping that she would see some sort of indication of the man whose characteristics were his hands dug deep into the pit of his pockets with a longing expression on his face who the gossipers of the staffroom assumed that it was longing for Rachel.

Rachel leant forwards and kissed Adam on the forehead wishing that the pair of them didn't know that this was the end of their lives together. They were interrupted by the police officer who bent down to Rachel's level so Adam was unable to hear what they were saying, "I'm afraid that we are unable to get Adam out; if we do the bleeding which is being stopped by the steering column will almost certainly kill him" Rachel let the tears run down her face as she was powerless to do anything to stop them. Feeling that she needed final clarification on the situation Rachel asked, "is there nothing that you are able to do?" The police officer looked for support from the rest of his colleagues behind him, "Well there is one thing that we are going to try but I wanted to warn you that you should perhaps say your goodbyes".

Rachel saw her the nurse that was holding Emma and urged her towards the car, "Please Adam needs to say goodbye to her". The nurse reluctantly handed her back to Rachel who turned and faced Adam once more.

Adam stretched out his arm once more ignoring the pain that it caused in his chest due to the action, "hey Emma; I want you to look after mummy for me…can you do that for me hey? You aren't going to remember me but I want you to know this I will always be looking after you…you and mummy" Adam eyes connecting with Rachel's once again as she mouthed towards him, "I promise". Adam leant as far forwards as his injuries would allow, to enable him to kiss Emma on the cheek. "Bye beautiful girl. I love you" Adam stated as Rachel returned her daughter to the waiting nurse.

Adam looked at Rachel, "thank you" as the pair of them shared what they both knew was going to be their last kiss. The moment was broken with the police officer asking Rachel to leave the car as they were going to attempt the procedure which they hoped was going to release Adam.

Steph checked all the classrooms and there was no sign of the man in question, why is it the one time that you want to find the management in this school they are never around whereas when I want to avoid them like the plague they are in ever corridor, classroom and discussion. With her heart sunk into the pit of her stomach Steph retreated back to the staff room believing that Rachel was another person who she had failed. Looking down one corridor she saw the sight that warmed her heart; if anyone didn't know any better they would think that I have some sort of interest in Eddie giving Rachel so competition but I think we all know that Rachel and Eddie are made for one another.

Rachel was holding Emma standing in the plain waiting room wishing that this was all a nightmare and she would wake up in the cocoon of happiness which she previously lived in. Rachel looked at her daughter who was refusing to settle and wrapped the blanket around her daughter, "I wish you could talk to tell me what the matter is because you are fed, warm…I suppose you may be tired but surely that would mean you would want to go to sleep". I know that children can pick up on atmospheres so maybe she is scared as I know that this waiting room isn't exactly the most welcoming and endearing. So perhaps I had better convince her that this is going to be ok.

"Emma daddy will be fine, he is strong" Rachel was lacking the conviction in this statement. She was interrupted by the sound and sight of the door opening.

"You have no idea how pleased I am to see you" Steph exclaimed as she ran forwards with her arms stretched wide almost as if she was planning to embrace him. Eddie had a confused expression on his face almost as if couldn't quite believe that he was receiving such a reaction from the woman but almost a bit disappointed as this wasn't the woman who he wanted to receive this reaction from.

The playful side of Steph and relieve at finding Eddie caused Steph to reply by saying, "If I wasn't so happy to see you I might get offended due to that reaction…but don't worry I'm here to help you in your quest to get closer to Rachel…" Eddie tried to interrupt her but the smile on Steph's face prevented him from saying anything and the slight smile that erupted on his face by the realisation that his feelings for Rachel were obvious to the people around him.

The glum expression which the doctor and nurse wore on their entrance into the room looked at Rachel with regret in their eyes. "Miss Mason, you may want to sit down" the doctor stated as Rachel felt the air was being pulled from her lungs knowing that this was the start of the conversation that she dreaded since their arrival at hospital.

Rachel touched her cheeks aware that the tears were now streaming down her face and she knew that like previous days Eddie was going to come and see whether she wanted to go for a drink. I had better leave because I can't explain this to him…not today anyway and if he sees me in this state he will certainly demand to know what the problem is.

Rachel gathered her belongings together and placed the paperwork into a bag knowing that it would be her company for the rest of the evening and the weekend.


	120. Chapter 120

Part 120

"Steph how can I help you" Eddie asked trying to control the smile which was spreading across his face with the mention of 'Rachel's' name. I really have to try and disguise my feelings a little better than that because I'm convinced that Rachel doesn't feel the same way because despite the progress that we seemed to make around Christmas. As soon as we got back to school she was eager to hold me at an arms length not letting me get close to her.

"Well as you are her closest friend I was hoping that you might be able to have a word with her" Steph asked believing Eddie knew who they were talking about when she was referred to as 'her'. The blank expression on his face represented the confusion in the conversation, "sorry Steph but you're going to have to be more specific because I have no idea who you are talking about". I seemed to disguise my feelings quite well I think.

Rachel sat on the sofa knowing that with the school day only ending 15 minutes ago that there wasn't any chance that she would be able to leave the premises without anybody seeing her and asking what was wrong with her. I really don't think that I had better leave just yet then I will stay here and stick it out for a bit longer hoping that nobody comes to visit.

Rachel shook her head as she was sitting on the sofa wishing that they were going to deliver the information that Rachel was already expecting following their arrival. "Miss Mason we are very sorry but there was nothing that we were able to do; as the injuries that Adam suffered from the collision were too great…" the doctor continued talking but the words were lost upon Rachel as the tears were down silently streaming down her face. What am I suppose to do now because he was our future. Rachel looked at her daughter who had now fallen silent which came as a form of relief for Rachel as she was questioning why Emma was crying constantly. Looking around the room in despair Rachel saw the nurse looking at Emma in concern. Why are the pair of them still here? Unless they are able to bring Adam back there is no point to them being here.

"Miss Mason can I have a look at your daughter please?" the nurse asked with a face full of concern for both Rachel and Emma and wasn't surprised when Rachel shook her head and pulled Emma closer towards her, "no I have already lost half of my family…there is no way that I'm letting our daughter out of my sight; not for a minute because I promised that I would look after her".

The expression on the nurse's face made Rachel confused, I wonder what could have happened to her? The nurse walked towards Rachel and took Emma out of Rachel's eyes; looking back at the doctor. With regret in her eyes she nodded to him and started walking out of the waiting room door.

"Where are you taking her?" Rachel called to the pair of them and was stunned by the answer that she received.

"We are taking her to rescue because she has trouble breathing" Rachel collapsed onto the floor of the waiting room as the door swung shut. Feeling shut off from the rest of the world Rachel cried for the past that she had lost, the future that she wasn't going to experience and the missed opportunities.

"Ooh Tom's your phone's ringing I wonder who it could be…" The five men joked enjoying seeing the annoyed expression on Tom's face believing that he was only joking. The rest of them looked at the caller display "Who is Rose then?" they asked as they looked at Tom with suspicious expressions on their faces. Tom rolled his eyes unimpressed with the friends that he had chosen to meet up with despite Davina being ill. Perhaps this is my revenge for coming out and leaving Davina.

"Don't give me that, Mr. Edward Lawson you know that I'm talking about a certain woman who stays firmly fixed in your heart" Steph responded looking for any signal from a change in Eddie's facial expression that she was correct and the involuntary lop-sided grin that was shown encouraged Steph to continue in the conversation as she knew that Eddie was going to help her.

"And what would I talk to her about?" Eddie asked hoping that Steph was going to tell him a way that he would be able to win Rachel's heart like she had won his many months ago.

"Well that's the thing, something is bothering Rachel but she won't let anyone in and tell them what the problem is but as you are her special friend I'm sure that you will be able to be her knight in shining amour" Steph said trying to contain the smirk after noticing the curve upwards of Eddie's mouth when she said the 'knight in shining amour'. It seems as though me and Matt were pretty accurate in our assumptions as to their feelings.

Ryan looked at Tom with a confused expression his face having noticed that Tom had looked unhappy throughout the entire evening. "I think that we should let Tom have his phone back so he can answer the call. It might be important" Ryan suggested as the others looked in disbelief however they reluctantly handed the phone over in time to allow Tom to answer his phone.

"Hi Rose. Is everything ok?" Tom asked and instantly his face dropped.

Rachel was sitting outside emergency room with eyes fixed firmly on the wall opposite wondering what she could have done different to help the people in her life and how they were harmed. It should have been me that was hurt because I'm the one that made all the mistakes especially my past so why should they die when they have more of a right to live then me. Rachel was interrupted by her thoughts with the doctor which had aided in the treatment of her daughter, looking down the corridor with a worried expression on their face.

"Doctor…"Rachel was struggling to find her voice, "how is she?" Rachel asked with the anxious thoughts being represented in her voice.

"So what are you waiting for?" Steph asked Eddie which caused him to march done the corridor in pursuit of Rachel and he called back to Steph.

"Just for future reference don't call me Edward again…but thank you" Eddie said as he turned back towards Steph and smiled at her to which she responded "you're welcome… Eddie". Perhaps I'm not quite the failure that I thought that I was.


	121. Chapter 121

Part 121  
**"I…I'm sorry Miss Mason; we did everything we could but…" the doctor started to a distraught Rachel who was unable to believe that in one accident she had lost both her fiance and her daughter. "What happened?" Rachel responded unable to comprehend why such a problem hadn't been spotted earlier by the nurse that had checked Emma at the scene. **  
**"As a result of the car accident, your daughter suffered a traumatic brain injury; a symptom of this was the consisent crying but obviously this was disguised with the apparent shock which the nurse preassumed Emma was suffering from. This type of injury was caused by an outside force causing trauma for the brain. It is unusual to result in death but due to the age of the child; the risk was intensified as the skull doesn't harden until the child is older..." the doctor continued talking as he was used to delivering unpleasant news to the relatives; admitted he didn't normally have to tell one person the news twice in a day but he had hardened his feelings towards the relatives knowing that there wasn't any chance of doing the job if they felt empathy for all the relatives.**  
**The doctor left Rachel knowing that there wasn't anything he was able to say to make her feel any better. **_**What am I suppose to do now?**_

"I don't understand…" Tom listened to the answer that he received from Rose, the panic on his face caused the rest of the table to fall into a stunned silence as they could understand the panic that was in his voice.  
"Ok I will be there straight away" Tom replied with panic in his voice which concerned the other five people on the table. Tom started to stand up as he ended the call with Rose and looked towards the men that were looking on with concern, "sorry I have to go as Davina has been taken ill and going to hospital" he stated and immediately Ryan got to his feet, "I will take you in my car". The two men walked out of the pub with the others shouting after them, "I hope that she is ok".

Eddie knocked on the door to Rachel's office relieved that she hadn't left yet. _I bet that she tries her best to disguise her true feelings to me because I can never get the truth out of her because of the barriers which surround her heart and refuse to let me in._  
"Come in" Eddie heard the tired voice of Rachel and wished that he was in a position where he would be able to wrap his arms around Rachel and give her the strength and support that she craved but denied herself the opportunity to accept it.  
Eddie pushed the door open and looked at Rachel who was sitting on the sofa and had a fake smile plastered on her face hoping that she was able to convince the person who had intruded upon her personal space despite wishing that she was going to be left alone

Tom ran to the hospital desk with urgency in his voice he said, "Can you tell me where Davina Clarkson is please?" The receptionist tapped away on the keyboard looking for the vital piece of information that would tell Tom exactly what he needed to know. The delay caused Tom to drum his fingers on the reception desk which was starting to irritate the receptionist. "Sir take a seat I will get a nurse to come and take you to her" the blonde woman stated happy to remove the man from her presence as she was fed up of the annoying noise that Tom was making.  
Reluctantly Tom sat down and started tapping his feet with the nerves and guilt knowing that he shouldn't have gone out that evening and left Davina. _I'm just so pleased that Rose went around to check that she was ok because if not she may still be on the floor; collapsed with no-body any the wiser. _The receptionist glared at Tom wishing that he would sit there quietly. _Why can't people ever sit there without trying to draw attention to themselves do they think that it will make people help them more. I just hope that the nurse that is helping to look after Davina is fetched quickly. _Tom looked at his watch; _I asked to see Davina not to sit here and watch other people being taken to their relatives who are here perhaps I had better go and ask again just to check that she hasn't forgotten about me because she didn't seem to be overly helpful when I initially asked._

"Hi Eddie. What can I do for you?" Rachel asked hoping that she would be able to fend any of his questions off and then be allowed to return to her peaceful sanctity. _I'm just glad that I had managed to dry my tears and re-apply my make-up before Eddie came through the door._  
"I wanted to see if you were ok?" Eddie asked knowing that this probably wasn't the best way to avoid confrontation with Rachel as she seemed to get aggravated at his comments very easily recently.  
As Eddie expected Rachel took offence to the comment, "Why wouldn't I be ok? Why does everybody think that something is wrong with me; do I have to have a permanent smile fixed on my face to make everybody else feel better because I am always happy. Well I'm sorry but sometimes I have other things on my mind rather than caring what everybody else wants and expects me to do!" The shocked expression of the outburst caused Rachel to feel guilty especially when she looked at Eddie's face and saw the hurt and saddened expression which had replaced the normal happy appearance; particularly whenever he was in her company.

The breath was caught in Tom's throat when he saw the receptionist pointing to him. _I just hope that they aren't going to deliver bad news to me. _Tom found himself standing up and walking towards the two women. "Mr. Clarkson…I presume" Tom nodded; pleased that he was finally going to see Davina but at the same time he wished that he didn't have to go because he could be in blissful ignorance believing that it wasn't actually happening.  
Tom was brought out of his thoughts with the sound of the nurse walking away down the corridor and the sound of her voice, "can you follow me please and I will take you to her where we will explain her condition".


	122. Chapter 122

Part 122  
"Sorry Eddie I have just had a bad day and I took it out on you" Rachel stated as Eddie left the doorway and started to walk towards Rachel who was sitting on the sofa. Rachel shuffled over to make room for Eddie and he looked with a concerned expression on his face to Rachel, "do you want to talk about it". To which Rachel shook her head knowing that she wouldn't be able to talk about it as she had already had flashbacks and broken down in tears about it twice today. _I don't think that I could take a third time. _  
Eddie looked back at Rachel and stated, "if you ever do you know where to find me don't you" Eddie asked needing to check that Rachel felt as though she was supported_. I wish that she would let me in as I know that she needs help but she is just refusing to accept any and I don't understand why. _Once again Rachel nodded and said, "So then how can I help you?" Rachel asked once more hoping that she would be able to get rid of Eddie and enable her to have some time to herself.

Just as Tom reached the room, the doctor that was treating Davina emerged from out of it. "Doctor this is Mr. Clarkson" to which the doctor reached his hand out to allow Tom to grasp it and shake hands. "Hello Mr. Clarkson I am Dr. Redfern and I've been treating Davina since she arrived. Would you like to take a seat" The doctor gestured to the seats that were outside of Davina's room and immediately Tom's stomach started to twist. _Isn't that what they say when they try to prepare someone for bad news?_  
"What is wrong with Davina?" Tom asked with his voice being filled with concern and nerves as to what could be wrong with Davina. _If it is something bad I can't believe that I never knew before; she is supposed to be the woman that I love._  
"Well when she came in she was drifting in and out of consciousness; which is something that we didn't understand as there wasn't a lot of information to go on". Tom was starting to get impatient; _why can't the doctors ever give a straight answer in this place. _  
"We are running some tests and we are going to try and find out the cause of the problem as soon as possible. I'm afraid that until we get the results back there isn't anything that we are able to do so we are going to have to be patient and wait" the doctor replied with concern in his voice seeing the heartbroken expression on Tom's face following the news. _That is alright for him to say because he isn't the one that doesn't know whether his wife is ok…but Davina is a fighter we will get through the problem; whatever it is._  
The doctor had left Tom as he was sitting in the corridor alone knowing that there was nothing that he could do except pray.

"Well I was wondering whether Miss Mason would like to join her loyal deputy for a drink." Eddie asked with an expression which Rachel was finding it hard to refuse. _I really don't want to go with him to the pub because I really don't feel in the mood to make idle chit-chat. I can't tell Eddie about Emma again today as he already found out a bit via Michael's questions. _Eddie looked at Rachel with a bemused expression on his face as he was wondering why Rachel's eyes seemed teary. _I wonder what happened before I came in because that would explain what Steph must have been talking about. _  
When Rachel didn't answer Eddie decided to ask her another question one that she may feel complied to answer. "Rachel you can tell me; I want to help you, is everything ok?"  
Rachel whose focus had previously been held by the floor immediately looked at Eddie almost as if she couldn't believe that he had asked such a question. Eddie walked towards Rachel and rested his hand on her lower arm.  
"Why Eddie why would you want to help me after all the problems in my past why do you insist on being there to pick up the pieces; trying to piece my life back together. It's not as though you get any thanks for it is it?" Rachel asked as the tears that had been threatening to fall cascaded down Rachel's cheeks at a rate which established that there was an underlying issue here rather than this outburst being a result of Eddie's questioning.

Tom heard someone approaching as they walked down the corridor; lifting his head out of his hands he rubbed his hands over his face trying to hold off the sleep which his body was craving but he refused to comply with. Tom stood up automatically as soon as he realised that it was a doctor and as they were walking towards him with some purpose; they obviously had some news about Davina.  
"Have you found out the problem with Davina?" A weary Tom almost as if he didn't actually want to hear the answer due to the impending problems that it may cause. _Sometimes I think that ignorance is bliss and I'm wondering if this is one of those times._  
"Yes" replied the stern looking doctor not giving any indication by his expression whether the news that he was going to deliver and whether it was good or bad.


	123. Chapter 123

Part 123

"Why do you think Rachel?" Eddie trying to gather his thoughts and contemplating whether he should pledge his love for her, or whether he should let the moment pass. _If I don't tell her now I probably never will but at the same time I will feel really awkward around her if she knocks me back. What would be the better option?_  
Rachel had the tears continuing to roll down her face and despite wishing that she wasn't crying in front of Eddie again she knew that she was unable to reign in the tears due to the strong emotions that were running through her. _I don't understand why I have lowered my barriers to Eddie because when I moved here I pledged that no-one was getting past them because I prefer being alone. I have no expectations of anyone so I don't get disappointed when they let me down._  
"I think that people feel disgusted by me and they wish that they are the person who are able to get my life back on track so they can get all the recognition for being the person that saved Rachel Mason". She stated not noticing the expression of horror and sadness that was etched on Eddie's face.

"Mr. Clarkson, your wife has suffered from an ectopic pregnancy which is why she was complaining of shoulder pain and ultimately fainted; due to the pain that she was in". The doctor was explaining the cause of Davina's symptoms to Tom and due to the high level of medical terminology that the doctor was using Tom was starting to get confused. _I wish that he would tell me what all this means for Davina because at the moment she is the person that I care about more than anything else in the world and I couldn't imagine my life without her. It almost seems as though this is happening to somebody else and I'm just witnessing it rather than actually being involved in it. _Tom started to think about everything that he knew about ectopic pregnancies; _obviously it means that she has lost the baby…I wonder if Davina knows about this because she will be devastated…I will be later but it doesn't seem to have sunk in yet. All I know is that I will have to support her and make sure she knows that I love her more than anything else in the world. _  
The doctor continued talking and the last statement was something that Tom heard due to the impact that it would have on all of their lives.

"Is that what you think I'm trying to do?" Eddie asked a distinct sadness in his voice and the apparent lack of concern that Rachel had for herself and how little she thought everybody cared for her. _I thought she knew how much I care about her and I can promise that I'm not the only one who cares about her._  
"Well I don't know to be honest because it's strange with you…different…" Rachel stopped trying to explain it knowing that she wasn't doing the most convincing job in claiming that she wanted to maintain Eddie's friendship after this little encounter. Eddie looked at her with a confused expression, "I'm sorry Rachel I don't understand" and in her response she contemplated explaining her reason again.  
"What I meant is it is different with you because it wouldn't just involve the two of us" Rachel stated as the tears had dried from her face and she was looking into Eddie's getting drawn in more and more as she felt the connection between the pair of them strengthen. Once more Eddie had another confused expression on his face and looked at Rachel wishing that for once she would stop doubting his feelings for her and she accepted that other people care for her.

"There is a possibility of her needing surgery if the fallopian tube is at risk of rupturing and only then can the surgeon assess the damage and decide the next course of action. However at the moment her condition is stable and despite feeling slightly worse for wear she is making good progress" The doctor concluded looking at Tom expecting the next question that every loving relative asked as soon as the doctor had finished speaking, "is she going to be ok?" The worried expression on Tom's face represented the love for her and the doctor recognised this having seen the varying emotions as he had been a doctor for a long time he knew the people who genuinely cared and the others who were here due to a sense of responsibility. _Davina is a very lucky woman due to the love that he has for her._  
"Well she is stable at the moment and awake I think would you like to see her" The doctor responded, to which Tom nodded eagerly; and started following the doctor into the room where Davina was. The doctor had his hand on the door handle and turned back to Tom and said, "She may be groggy at the moment so she doesn't know about the ectopic pregnancy". Before Tom was able to comment the doctor had opened the door with a ill-stricken Davina in the room caused Tom's focus to be changed from the doctor to Davina.

"What do you mean Rachel; why isn't it just the pair of us?" Eddie asked although he was anticipating the answer that he was going to receive. _I bet she will say she has to be concerned about the school and the possibility of the pupils and staff knowing about a possible relationship between the pair of us. _Rachel looked back at Eddie in disbelief; _surely he knows that it doesn't just involve the two of us. _"Well firstly we would have to contemplate telling the pupils and staff; lets be honest it doesn't look very profession does it and secondly and the more important reason, we would have to consider Michael in all of this as does he want someone else taking his dad attention from him and you. You have missed enough of his life so your attention can't be divided as you never know when they may be taken away from you…" Rachel had to stop talking knowing that she wouldn't be able to keep her emotions in check for any longer due to the realisation that the romance and feelings she had for Eddie were never going to be something that was possible for her to have despite her wishing for it ever minute she saw him and dreaming about it every night.


	124. Chapter 124

Part 124  
"Rachel somehow I don't think that Michael would be complaining if you spent some time with the pair of us" Eddie responded with a wry smile knowing that Rachel was the one person who Michael always asked Eddie about whenever he saw him. Rachel didn't look totally convinced however her eyes were lacking the conviction behind her refusal which made Eddie convinced that for once he was actually going to win the battle against her. _I know that I will because I'm not going to give up until I have won it._  
"And is that what you want me…?" Rachel trailed off in her question, lacking the confidence to finish the question in an audible volume. _What was I thinking why did I even consider asking that talk about putting him on the spot like that…I can't believe that I ever did it. Right, I had better come up with something good to get me out of this mess._  
The boyish grin of Eddie's had returned, as he looked back into Rachel's eyes showing the strength of his feelings he replied, "I couldn't think of anything I would like more" Eddie replied and looked at Rachel so he could see her reaction when she established what he had meant by the comment. Rachel dipped her head to the floor when she heard the comment; as she had to disguise the smile and the blush that crept on her cheeks when she realised Eddie had just offered her everything that she wanted from him. _Before she dipped her head I'm sure that I saw a smile…why would that be is it because she is pleased that I feel like this or is she pleased that she has made another man fall for her dazzling beauty; just to prove that she is still out of my league…resulting in another rejection. The only difference is I don't think that I could take another rejection as I couldn't see her and work with her every day knowing that I had put our friendship in jeopardy by exposing my feelings._

The doctor left as soon as he had checked Davina's blood pressure and reminded Tom that Davina shouldn't be placed under any stress. _I guess that is a warning that I shouldn't tell her what the problem is…but what do I tell her because she is going to inevitably ask. _Tom sat beside Davina and immediately took hold of her hand; lifting it to his lips he placed a feather-like kiss on it almost as if would break if he did applied too much pressure.  
Davina's eyes flickered open and the pair of them exchanged a smile and she instantly knew that Tom had been told her condition. _Surely he will tell me because I can't believe that I have been here for a couple of hours and no-body has bothered to tell me why I collapsed. Although, he has probably been told not to tell me so I will have to try and subtly ask him._

When Rachel heard Eddie sigh she lifted her head and saw the obvious pain in the eyes of the man stood in front of her. Considering her next move Rachel realised that she had left it too long when Eddie was shuffling from one foot to another and stated, "Well I'll see you tomorrow then" the disappointment in his voice was evident and it made Rachel's heart soar. _Obviously I don't want to see him hurt but I does represent how much he must love me and for that I'm going to hold on to him and never let him go. _  
Eddie turned away from Rachel and was struggling to hold the tears as being the strong man that he tried maintain the image of he was certain that he shouldn't show this pain to Rachel especially as her feelings were obviously platonic for him.

_I wish that I was able to convince Rachel that a relationship between the pair of us could work but she doesn't even seemed prepared to try. Looks as though I will continue cooking for one because I know that I could go out and prove that there are people who are better than Rachel but in my mind there is anyone better than her. Rachel is perfect but all I know is that she can never be mine however much I might desire her to be; I just hope that she will find happiness and find someone who will treat her with the respect that she deserves because she is an inspiration to many people; including me._


	125. Chapter 125

Part 125  
Rachel leant forwards and placed her hand on Eddie's lower arm causing the electricity to shoot through both of their bodies and Eddie looked at Rachel confused, _what else is there to say I have told her how I feel and she just didn't respond surely that proves she doesn't feel the same way. Why are there always mixed signals from Rachel in moments like this…talk about being confusing. _  
"I'm sorry Eddie but can you stay for a bit because I think there are things to say" Rachel gestured for Eddie to follow her to sofa which he dutifully did.

Davina looked at the pained expression on Tom's face and decided that as he was normally the positive person in the relationship something must be bad. _Surely that is another reason why I deserve to know my condition. _"I'm sorry" Davina stated as she squeezed his hand tighter wishing that she was able to take the pain away from him. Tom looked at her confused, _why should she be sorry it's not as though it is her fault. _"…Why are you sorry?" Tom asked not understanding what Davina had meant. _I would think that she is blaming herself but surely that isn't the case because to mine and the doctors knowledge she doesn't know what is wrong with her. I can't say that I agree with that because I'm not going to lie to her._

The pair of them sat in an uncomfortable silence with the tension and the desire to say things to one another hanging in the air. Both of them opened their mouths to speak at separate times and then decided against it knowing that it wasn't the best way to start the conversation. The one conversation that had the possibility of changing their lives, to enable them to possess everything that they longed for and dreamt of.  
Eddie looked at Rachel realising that he was going to be the one that would break the unusual tension from between the pair of them, "Rachel…" _Come on Eddie you can do it because I think we both know that there are things that need to be said and if you don't then you will probably have passed up the best opportunity that you will have to tell Rachel how you feel about her. I guess that I did promise myself that if I had this type of opportunity I was going to do it. So I have to just plan what I'm going to say and actually tell her how I feel about her; which I know because I feel these feelings every time that I see her._  
"I've been meaning to ask you for a while really and until now I haven't had the confidence to ask you" Eddie started and paused almost adding to the dramatic effect of the opening sentence. Initially Rachel was pleased that he had been the one to break the silence between the pair of tjhem however her mind soon went into overdrive. _He's going to ask me to marry him…what do I say?_

Davina looked back at Tom noticing the slight pause before he spoke signalling that he knew more than he claimed to, "because I ruined your evening…I'll be fine her as I'm quite tired so I'm sure that you could go back to the pub and meet up with them all again…" Before Davina had finished talking Tom had interrupted her, "the evening wasn't that good to be honest and anyway there is no way that I'm leaving you" Tom responded with a determined voice showing that this wasn't up for negotiation.  
Davina was immediately concerned by this, "why am I that unwell that you don't like to leave?"


End file.
